Mai nou, plou\u0103 cu nenorociri. S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na \u015fi atacul terorist \/ incendiul cu iz de atac terorist \/ fl\u0103c\u0103ul frumos propus ministru \u015fi azv\u00e2rlit f\u0103r\u0103 mil\u0103 \u00een neant la o or\u0103 dup\u0103. Niciodat\u0103 via\u0163a n-a fost at\u00e2t de grea ca \u00een toamna lui 2015. \u015ei cum reac\u0163ionezi tu la tot acest chin? <\/p>\n
Ce \u00eentrebare penibil\u0103, ve\u0163i replica voi. Retoric\u0103, nu penibil\u0103, bre, aceia. Cu r\u0103spuns sub\u00een\u0163eles. Amatorul sufer\u0103 cum d\u0103 Dumnezeu, profesionistul sufer\u0103 conform regulilor \u015fi normelor. Pe care ni le-au predat pe r\u00e2nd to\u0163i exper\u0163ii \u00een suferit de pe re\u0163elele sociale. Pentru c\u0103 se \u015ftieee, vara nu-i ca iarna, nunta nu-i \u00eenmorm\u00e2ntare (nu l\u0103sa\u0163i Miori\u0163a s\u0103 v\u0103 p\u0103c\u0103leasc\u0103) \u015fi nici tot ce se m\u0103n\u00e2nc\u0103 nu zboar\u0103. Era \u015fi vorba popular\u0103 cu nu tot ce e gaur\u0103 cu p\u0103r, dar voi \u015fti\u0163i continuarea iar eu ur\u0103sc s\u0103 fiu C\u0103pit\u0103neasa Evident\u0103, sau Elena Udrea, cum i se mai spune. <\/p>\n
Opa, am divagat grav, ceea ce de la dou\u0103 sticle de vin \u00een sus e ok. Deci cum se sufer\u0103 profesionist. Lec\u0163ii \u00eenv\u0103\u0163ate cu greu de la speciali\u015ftii \u00een suferit ai lui Facebook, care, se \u015ftie, au luat to\u0163i medalia de aur ex aequo la Olimpiada Interna\u0163ional\u0103 de Suferit. <\/p>\n
1. Thou shallst not have poz\u0103 de profil cu z\u00e2mbet <\/strong><\/p>\n Coae, bre, nesim\u0163itule sau nesim\u0163ito, lumea \u00ee\u015fi rupe p\u0103rul din cap \u015fi tu afi\u015fezi poza cu tine-n rochie de bal la nunta lu’ var\u0103-ta? Inadecvatule sau inadecvato. “P\u0103i da bine, dar io, \u0103\u0103\u0103, e singura mea poz\u0103 \u00een care m\u0103 plac \u015fi eu”. 2. Thou shallst not prioritizezi o dram\u0103 peste alta. <\/strong><\/p>\n A fost atentat terorist \u00een Fran\u0163a, iar c\u00e2teva ore mai devreme, a fost \u00een Beirut. Logic, agen\u0163iile rom\u00e2ne\u015fti au raportat crimele din Fran\u0163a primele c\u0103, deh, France Presse func\u0163ioneaz\u0103 mai rapid dec\u00e2t, \u0103\u0103\u0103, Beirut Presse? Pfoooa. Discriminatorilor. Cum rasa voastr\u0103 caucazian\u0103 suferi\u0163i preferen\u0163ial??? 3. Thou shallst not pui steagul Fran\u0163ei peste poza de profil <\/strong><\/p>\n P\u0103i ce, nesim\u0163i\u0163ii au pus cumva steagul rom\u00e2nesc?? <\/p>\n Ce conteaz\u0103 c\u0103 au fost printre primele \u0163\u0103ri care s-au oferit s\u0103 ajute \u00een cazul urgen\u0163elor de la Colectiv, ce conteaz\u0103 c\u0103 au trimis medici \u015fi echipament, ce conteaz\u0103 c\u0103 au preluat bolnavi \u00een clinicile lor? Se \u015ftieee, ce nu afi\u015fezi pe Facebook nu exist\u0103. <\/p>\n 4. Thou shallst juri ur\u0103 etern\u0103 musulmanilor \u015fi, prioritar, sirienilor <\/strong><\/p>\n Nu conteaz\u0103 c\u0103 inclusiv Assad, despotul Siriei, a zis de atacurile din Fran\u0163a ceva de genul: Regret c-au fost, dar acum m\u0103car ne crede\u0163i \u015fi pe noi prin ce trecem cu idio\u0163ii \u0103\u015ftia \u00een \u0163ar\u0103. Nu conteaz\u0103 c\u0103 faza cu buletinul de emigrant sirian, g\u0103sit la terorist, a fost genul de \u00eenscenare cusut\u0103 nu cu a\u0163\u0103 alb\u0103 ci cu cinci mosoare de a\u0163\u0103 alb\u0103. Nu conteaz\u0103 c\u0103 nimeni nu las\u0103 c\u0103\u0163el \u015fi purcel, cas\u0103 \u015fi ograd\u0103 s\u0103 treac\u0103 Mediterana cu barca dec\u00e2t dac\u0103 \u00eei e terifiant de greu unde era. Nu conteaz\u0103 c\u0103 poate m\u00e2ine \u0163i se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 \u015fi \u0163ie vreo nenorocire \u015fi atunci o s\u0103 visezi la o m\u00e2n\u0103 cald\u0103 \u00eentins\u0103, nu la l\u0103trat dispre\u0163uitor \u015fi atoate\u015ftiutor. 5. Thou shallst not examinezi superoferte la pantofi <\/strong><\/p>\n Sau, na, asta era la Colectiv, c\u00e2nd o doamn\u0103, merg\u00e2nd cu metroul, s-a uitat \u00een mobilul altei doamne \u015fi a constatat c\u0103 aia, ca vaca, nu suferea regulamentar, ci examina ni\u015fte stilettos la reducere. Cum \u00ee\u015fi permitea ordinara? Presupun c\u0103 se aplic\u0103 \u015fi la dezastrele curente. Caz \u00een care sper c\u0103 ave\u0163i suficiente perechi de pantofi acas\u0103, c\u0103, p\u00e2n\u0103 se termin\u0103 sezonul nenorocirilor, risc\u0103m s\u0103 umbl\u0103m to\u0163i descul\u0163i. Mai nou, plou\u0103 cu nenorociri. S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na \u015fi atacul terorist \/ incendiul cu iz de atac terorist \/ fl\u0103c\u0103ul frumos propus ministru \u015fi azv\u00e2rlit f\u0103r\u0103...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":10080,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10079","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/leave.jpeg?fit=315%2C243&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10079","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10079"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10079\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10085,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10079\/revisions\/10085"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/10080"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10079"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10079"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10079"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nNu conteaz\u0103\u0103! Trebuie s\u0103 ai musai o poz\u0103 cu jale. Zilele astea, jalea e obligatorie. \u015etii c\u0103 la \u015fcoal\u0103 uniforma a redevenit obligatorie \u015fi e\u015fti dat afar\u0103 de la ore dac\u0103 vii \u00een blugi? A\u015fa \u015fi poza de profil cu jale. Dac\u0103 n-ai jale p\u0103 tine, vei fi dat afar\u0103 de pe Facebook. <\/p>\n
\n“M\u0103 scuza\u0163i, habar n-am avut de drama din Beirut. C\u0103 plm, am \u00een bookmarks agen\u0163ii de pres\u0103 europene. Mi-e mai u\u015for s\u0103 suf\u0103r dac\u0103 i se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 ceva vecinului dec\u00e2t dac\u0103 se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 domnului Vasile C\u0103ma\u015f\u0103 din F\u0103urei. Asta nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 nu \u00een\u0163eleg drama domnului Vasile C\u0103ma\u015f\u0103, dar ia-m\u0103 cu \u00eencetinelul \u015fi \u00eent\u00e2i poveste\u015fte-mi drama domnului Vasile C\u0103ma\u015f\u0103 din F\u0103urei \u015fi dup\u0103 ce te asiguri c-am \u00een\u0163eles-o, b\u0103uni la mine. Ce zici?”
\nNu ne intereseaz\u0103! N-ai suferit pentru Beirut chiar \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 \u015ftii? Via\u0163a ta e f\u0103r\u0103 valoare. <\/p>\n
\nDac\u0103 nu o arzi generalizant \u015fi du\u015fm\u0103nos la adresa tuturor musulmanilor, nu suferi cu adev\u0103rat. <\/p>\n
\nNu am verificat dac\u0103 interdic\u0163ia se aplic\u0103 \u015fi la haine, dar e ok. Dac\u0103 le uzez pe astea, \u00eemi fac din perdele, ca Scarlett O’Hara. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"