Orice autor de umor cunoa\u015fte din r\u0103runchi momentul \u015fi \u00eel detest\u0103. Momentul c\u00e2nd apare un idiot f\u0103r\u0103 umor \u015fi-\u0163i omoar\u0103 gluma cu o b\u0103d\u0103r\u0103nie f\u0103r\u0103 sens, doar pentru c\u0103 poate. Sau doar pentru c\u0103 nu poate. <\/p>\n
Gre\u015feala mea de p\u00e2n\u0103 acum era c\u0103 m\u0103 enervam prea tare pe idiot. Idiotul nu pricepe de ce e antihaz ce face, pentru c\u0103, logic, asta cere inteligen\u0163\u0103. \u00cen mintea idiotului, el nu f\u0103cea dec\u00e2t s\u0103 contribuie la conversa\u0163ie. Cu ce putea \u015fi el, dup\u0103 dot\u0103ri \u015fi aplica\u0163ii. Creierul nu ni-l alegem. Nici nu-l putem da \u00een judecat\u0103 pe Dumnezeu pentru rebut. <\/p>\n
\u015ei atunci solu\u0163ia pentru masacrarea glumei e: <\/p>\n
“Frate, \u00ee\u0163i mul\u0163umesc c\u0103 mi-ai ucis gluma.
\n\u00ce\u015fi sim\u0163ea sf\u00e2r\u015fitul aproape. De\u015fi se \u0163inea bine, era \u00eenc\u0103 verde. Dar fraterniza cu ciobanul din Miori\u0163a. \u015ei mi-a zis gluma mea:
\n“Vezi tu steaua aia c\u0103z\u0103toare?”
\n“Da. \u015ei?”
\n“E semn c\u0103 o s\u0103 mor \u00een cur\u00e2nd. Te implor s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eengropi \u00een c\u00e2mp cu mohor.”
\n“Pula c\u00e2mp de mohor, acum iarna”
\n“Ce s\u0103 facem, nu alegem c\u00e2nd murim, \u0103sta e destinul implacabil”, mi-a zis gluma. “\u015ei \u00eenainte, s\u0103 m\u0103 sco\u0163i neap\u0103rat pe Internet, s\u0103 g\u0103sim \u00eempreun\u0103 cretinul f\u0103r\u0103 umor care o s\u0103-mi pecetluiasc\u0103 soarta.”
\n“Ce preten\u0163ii pe tine”
\n“\u015ei acum, c\u0103 dac\u0103 mai prege\u0163i, \u00ee\u0163i cer \u015fi fluiera\u015f de fag \u015fi restul sufl\u0103torilor”
\n“OK, gata, gata, am \u00een\u0163eles ideea. Hai”
\nDeci, coaie, mersi c\u0103 mi-ai ucis-o c\u00e2t avea preten\u0163ii mici.
\nAcum \u015ftii \u015fi direc\u0163ia spre un c\u00e2mp de mohor?” <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Orice autor de umor cunoa\u015fte din r\u0103runchi momentul \u015fi \u00eel detest\u0103. Momentul c\u00e2nd apare un idiot f\u0103r\u0103 umor \u015fi-\u0163i omoar\u0103 gluma cu o b\u0103d\u0103r\u0103nie...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9853,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10292","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/valeu.jpg?fit=800%2C621&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10292","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10292"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10292\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10293,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10292\/revisions\/10293"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9853"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10292"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10292"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10292"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}