La un moment dat, m\u0103 apucasem s\u0103 studiez cancerul, s\u0103 scriu un roman despre. A trebuit s\u0103 \u00eentrerup proiectul, dintr-un motiv colateral: rude cretine \u015fi nesim\u0163ite. Dar asta nu m-a l\u0103sat mai pu\u0163in \u00eendurerat\u0103 fa\u0163\u0103 de aceast\u0103 anomalie a organismului uman, care vine pe nea\u015fteptate, r\u0103v\u0103\u015fe\u015fte complet via\u0163a lini\u015ftit\u0103 a suferindului \u015fi a tuturor persoanelor care-l iubesc, st\u00e2rne\u015fte suferin\u0163e de nedescris, cheltuieli de mii de euro \u015fi eterna sabie a lui Damocles deasupra capetelor tuturor celor implica\u0163i.
\nAcum, acest cancer al politicii rom\u00e2ne\u015fti, care e madam Alina Gorghiu, a venit cu propunerea imbecil\u0103 ca pacien\u0163ii de cancer s\u0103-\u015fi pl\u0103teasc\u0103 singuri jum\u0103tate de tratament, dac\u0103 boala a avansat.
\nPas\u0103mite, dac\u0103 din s\u0103r\u0103cie, o mam\u0103 divor\u0163at\u0103 cu trei copii \u015fi dou\u0103 joburi nu apuc\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi identifice cancerul de col uterin, trebuie s\u0103 rup\u0103 de la gura celor trei copii \u015fi s\u0103 se trateze.
\nPas\u0103mite, dac\u0103 din s\u0103r\u0103cie, un pensionar nu-\u015fi identific\u0103 din timp cancerul osos, d\u0103-l dreq’ s\u0103 moar\u0103, c\u0103 oricum din pensia aia de mizerie nu mai ai ce rupe. <\/p>\n
S\u0103 preciz\u0103m: eu am fost simpatizant liberal de c\u00e2nd m-am n\u0103scut. Am vederi politice de dreapta. Cred \u00een antreprenoriat, \u00een taxe mici, \u00een ini\u0163iativ\u0103 \u015fi tot ce face liberalismul o idee bun\u0103. Chiar nu cred c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 vin\u0103 statul s\u0103-mi dea l\u0103ptic \u015fi \u015ftearg\u0103 la botic post-l\u0103ptic. <\/p>\n
Dar ce a f\u0103cut femeia asta din partidul \u0103la e o chestie absolut oribil\u0103, stupid\u0103 cu bulbuci \u015fi lipsit\u0103 de orice ini\u0163iativ\u0103, care s-a l\u0103udat un an \u00eentreg c\u0103-l d\u0103 jos pe Ponta, \u00een condi\u0163iile \u00een care erau intens dori\u0163i \u015fi de UE, \u015fi, \u00eentr-un an \u00eentreg, au dat jos doar mo\u0163ul de pe rahat. <\/p>\n
Nu exist\u0103 partid f\u0103r\u0103 conduc\u0103tor. Nu exist\u0103 partid f\u0103r\u0103 o persoan\u0103 puternic\u0103, hot\u0103r\u00e2t\u0103 \u015fi apt\u0103 de decizii ferme \u015fi utile. De ini\u0163iative organizate \u015fi coerente. Nu exist\u0103 partid f\u0103r\u0103 un strateg. <\/p>\n
Iar strategia “m\u0103 laud c\u0103 te fut \u00een anus” e cea mai infantil\u0103, penibil\u0103, retardat\u0103 \u015fi oligofren\u0103 din lume. Dac\u0103 eu m\u0103 laud c\u0103 te voi fute \u00een anus, \u015fi pe tine nu te excit\u0103 deloc perspectiva, ce faci?
\nD\u0103h. Te asiguri c\u0103-\u0163i \u0163ii anusul departe de mine.
\n\u00ce\u0163i iei chilo\u0163i de tabl\u0103.
\nTe baricadezi \u00een pivni\u0163e antirachete anale.
\n\u00ce\u0163i ui\u0163i anusul acas\u0103 c\u00e2nd ne vedem.
\nPe scurt, dac\u0103 suntem inamici \u015fi eu \u00eemi enun\u0163 inten\u0163ia, te pun \u00een gard\u0103.
\nCel mai amuzant e c\u00e2nd sunt prost de pute p\u0103m\u00e2ntul sub mine \u015fi te pun \u00een gard\u0103 absolut inutil, c\u0103 eu oricum nu fac dec\u00e2t s\u0103 m\u0103 laud. <\/p>\n
Apoi a fost panarama aia nesf\u00e2r\u015fit\u0103 cu tururile de scrutin locale. Care au fost o dat\u0103 votate. \u015ei Gorghiu et co au votat senin pentru unul.
\n\u015ei cu exact patru luni \u00eenainte de alegeri, se treze\u015fte s\u0103 \u0163ipe ca din gur\u0103 de \u015farpe: S\u0103 se modifice legileeeeeeee.
\nCe proast\u0103 e\u015fti, Gorghiu. N-ai votat tu pentru un tur de scrutin?
\nNu m\u0103 intereseaz\u0103 ce-am votat, s\u0103 se modifice legileeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
\nDar \u015ftii c\u0103 legea zice c\u0103 am intrat bini\u015for \u00een anul electoral \u015fi c\u0103 nu se poate?
\nNu m\u0103 intereseaz\u0103, s\u0103 se modifice legileeeeeeeeeeeeeee. <\/p>\n
Ca un copil handicapat c\u0103ruia i se c\u0103\u015fun\u0103 la o \u00eenmorm\u00e2ntare c\u0103 vrea ur\u015fi guma\u0163i.
\n“Gigel, nu acum, m\u0103mic\u0103.”
\n“Vleauuu ulsuleeee\u0163i gumaaaaa\u0163i!!!”
\n“Gigel, bunica ta care te-a iubit e \u00een sicriu acolo. N-o vei revedea niciodat\u0103. Hai s\u0103 ne concentr\u0103m pe asta”.
\n“Vleaauuuu ulsuleeee\u0163i gumaaaa\u0163i!!”
\n“Gigel, tat\u0103l t\u0103u vorbe\u015fte acum despre mama lui \u015fi toat\u0103 iubirea pe care \u015fi-au purtat-o. Tu cum o s\u0103 te sim\u0163i la \u00eenmorm\u00e2ntarea mea? C\u00e2nd \u015fi eu voi deveni p\u0103m\u00e2nt?”
\n“Vleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu ulsuleeeeeeeeeeeeeee\u0163i gumaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa\u0163i!”
\nDiferen\u0163a e c\u0103 asta e adult\u0103. <\/p>\n
P\u00e2n\u0103 acum era doar proast\u0103, ineficient\u0103 \u015fi inoportun\u0103. \u00cen a\u015fa hal, \u00eenc\u00e2t s-au prins \u015fi cei din UE c\u0103 n-au cu cine \u015fi au schimbat planul, au ales tehnocra\u0163i. <\/p>\n
Acum, la faza cu cancerul, e dovede\u015fte \u015fi halul de toxicitate al prostiei. C\u0103 prostia nu vine singur\u0103. Vine musai la pachet cu r\u0103utate \u015fi lips\u0103 de viziune. Ce pleonastic\u0103 sunt azi. <\/p>\n
Pe scurt, Gorghiu, \u00ee\u0163i doresc s\u0103 faci cancer. \u00cen grad 4. Cu metastaz\u0103. \u015ei s\u0103 se aplice legea pe care o vrei tu acum. C\u0103 dac\u0103 n-ai fi halucinant de vac\u0103 proast\u0103, ai \u015fti c\u0103 exist\u0103 cancere care evolueaz\u0103 \u00een termen de o lun\u0103, iar controalele omului normal sunt anuale.
\nPoate ai cancer chiar acum \u015fi nu \u015ftii.
\nM\u0103car cr\u0103pi naibii \u015fi ne redai partidul care a fost odinioar\u0103 al Br\u0103tienilor.
\nCancer ambulant ce e\u015fti. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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