Povesteam eu la telefon cu Andreea Bibiri. \u015ei zice.
\n-B\u0103i, cel mai de rahat e c\u00e2nd un musafir se uit\u0103 critic prin cas\u0103. Eu una n-a\u015f face niciodat\u0103 a\u015fa ceva.
\n-Nu, fac eu. Cel mai de rahat e s\u0103-\u0163i vin\u0103 menajera, s\u0103 \u0163i se uite critic prin cas\u0103. Exemplu: Am fost eu prin patrie cu ni\u015fte Povestiri din Miserupia, apoi am avut film\u0103ri, apoi reportaje pl\u0103tite \u015fi tot a\u015fa dou\u0103 s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2ni. Plus lenea, \u00eenc\u0103 dou\u0103. Aveam cocin\u0103. Tanti a mea obi\u015fnuit\u0103 nu era disponibil\u0103, am chemat o alta pe recomand\u0103ri. \u015ei unde nu se uit\u0103 aia \u00een jur apocaliptico-melodramatic \u015fi \u00eencepe.
\n“Ce-i aici, Dumnezeule?”
\n“Jeg. C\u0103 de-aia te-am chemat. \u015ei de-aia te pl\u0103tesc. Dac\u0103 era aproximativ cur\u0103\u0163el, m\u0103 descurcam \u015fi singur\u0103.”
\n“\u015ei mai e\u015fti \u015fi fat\u0103.”
\n“\u015ei dac\u0103 sunt fat\u0103, ce? Cutiile mele goale de bere \u015fi sticlele de vin, nemaivorbind de con\u0163inutul a patru dulapuri de haine, se metamorfozeaz\u0103 magic \u015fi dispar?”
\n“Doamnee”.
\n“Auzi, madam, direc\u0163ia banilor din discu\u0163ia asta e dinspre mine spre tine. OK? Nu e\u015fti maic\u0103-mea oripilat\u0103 c\u0103 nu mi-am f\u0103cut curat \u00een camer\u0103, e\u015fti o angajat\u0103 care ia bani. Te pl\u0103tesc s\u0103 faci curat, nu s\u0103-mi faci observa\u0163ii de rahat \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 faci s\u0103 m\u0103 simt prost c\u0103 te-am angajat. Mopul e acolo, c\u00e2rpele dincolo. Spor.” <\/p>\n
\u015ei Bibiri:
\n-Da, frate, a\u015fa \u015fi eu cu ma\u015fina. N-o sp\u0103l, c\u0103 oricum se jego\u015fe\u015fte la loc \u00een ora\u015f. Iar c\u00e2nd merg la sp\u0103l\u0103torie, se uit\u0103 \u0103ia ca la felul opti\u015fpe.
\n“Ce-i cu ma\u015fina dvs.?”
\n“E murdar\u0103, duuh. De-aia am adus-o.”
\n“Vaaai.”
\n“Oameni buni, care e problema voastr\u0103? Lumea vine s\u0103 spele ma\u015fina de murdar\u0103 ce e, nu de curat\u0103 ce e. Come on.” <\/p>\n
\u015ei a\u015fa, pe post de concluzie final\u0103. Pariez c\u0103 dac\u0103 eram doi zdrahoni cu pumnul de fier, nu comenta nimeni nimic. Se \u00eencasau frumu\u015fel banii, se executa frumu\u015fel sp\u0103latul, s\u0103n\u0103tate la neamuri. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Povesteam eu la telefon cu Andreea Bibiri. \u015ei zice. -B\u0103i, cel mai de rahat e c\u00e2nd un musafir se uit\u0103 critic prin cas\u0103. Eu...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9790,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10384","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/7192lljzkzL.jpg?fit=2000%2C1215&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10384","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10384"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10384\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10387,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10384\/revisions\/10387"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9790"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10384"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10384"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10384"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}