Intru \u00een scara de bloc. O stimabil\u0103 tanti \u00een v\u00e2rst\u0103 tocmai intr\u0103 \u00een lift. M\u0103 \u00eentreab\u0103:
\n-Urci cu liftul?
\n-Nu mul\u0163umesc, merg pe sc\u0103ri.
\nLa etajul 6, se deschide u\u015fa liftului \u015fi iese cucoana.
\n-P\u0103i de ce n-ai venit cu liftul?
\n-Am precizat deja c\u0103 merg pe sc\u0103ri, doamn\u0103.
\n-Aaa, vrei s\u0103 sl\u0103be\u015fti.
\n(Pe un ton b\u0103nuitor, de parc\u0103 m\u0103 acuza de trafic de droguri.)
\n-Da, m\u0103 citi\u0163i ca pe o carte de colorat.
\n-Dar nu e\u015fti foarte gras\u0103.
\nGenul \u0103la de insult\u0103 \u00eempachetat\u0103 \u00een pseudo-compliment care te face s\u0103 vrei s\u0103 omori omul cu un topor sc\u0103pat din gre\u015feal\u0103 peste sc\u0103f\u00e2rfie.
\n-Vai, mul\u0163umesc, m\u0103 onora\u0163i, izbucnesc entuziast.
\nO v\u0103d c\u0103 m\u0103 m\u0103soar\u0103 oarecum precaut\u0103: nu \u015ftie dac\u0103-s proast\u0103 sau curv\u0103. Sau ambele.
\n-\u015ei crezi c\u0103 b\u0103rba\u0163ii merit\u0103 s\u0103 sl\u0103be\u015fti pentru ei?
\n(“\u0102? Tanti, dac\u0103 urcatul sc\u0103rilor ar fi fost o preten\u0163ie masculin\u0103, luam liftul \u015fi la bud\u0103.”)
\n-Da, doamn\u0103. Merit\u0103 \u015fi s\u0103 ne punem silicoane pentru ei. \u015ei botox. \u015ei acid hialuronic. \u015ei strap-on. Dublu.
\n-O s\u0103 te dezam\u0103geasc\u0103 unul \u015fi-\u0163i trece.
\n-Pe mine? Niciodat\u0103. M\u0103 scuza\u0163i, mai am de urcat c\u00e2teva etaje. A zis iubi c\u0103 la 3000 de trepte urcate m\u0103 ia de so\u0163ie.
\nM\u0103 simt prost s\u0103 ironizez b\u0103tr\u00e2ni. A\u015f prefera s\u0103-i admir \u015fi s\u0103-i respect pentru v\u00e2rsta \u015fi \u00een\u0163elepciunea lor. Mai ales c\u00e2nd – \u015fi dac\u0103 – se manifest\u0103. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Intru \u00een scara de bloc. O stimabil\u0103 tanti \u00een v\u00e2rst\u0103 tocmai intr\u0103 \u00een lift. M\u0103 \u00eentreab\u0103: -Urci cu liftul? -Nu mul\u0163umesc, merg pe sc\u0103ri....<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":11560,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11557","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/stairway.jpg?fit=3375%2C1662&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11557","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11557"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11557\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11561,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11557\/revisions\/11561"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/11560"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11557"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11557"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11557"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}