{"id":11766,"date":"2016-12-03T11:44:09","date_gmt":"2016-12-03T08:44:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=11766"},"modified":"2016-12-03T11:49:12","modified_gmt":"2016-12-03T08:49:12","slug":"lucruri-pe-care-nu-le-am-facut-niciodata","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/lucruri-pe-care-nu-le-am-facut-niciodata\/","title":{"rendered":"Lucruri pe care nu le-am f\u0103cut niciodat\u0103"},"content":{"rendered":"

Nu am<\/strong> tras de b\u0103rba\u0163i pentru care nu eram \u00een mod vizibil op\u0163iunea num\u0103rul 1. <\/p>\n

A\u0163i zice c\u0103 e vorba de orgoliu. Dar de fapt, e realism pur. <\/p>\n

Hei, eu sunt Lorena. Sunt un dezastru \u00een buc\u0103t\u0103rie, pe strad\u0103 \u015fi \u00een dormitor. Scap coji de cartofi \u00een ciorb\u0103 \u015fi din\u0163i \u00een cea mai intens\u0103 fela\u0163ie. E foarte clar c\u0103 dac\u0103 nu m\u0103 iube\u015fti din prima, n-o s\u0103 m\u0103 iube\u015fti \u00een vecii vecilor.
\nTocmai de aceea, unde nu v\u0103d o mare \u015fi necondi\u0163ionat\u0103 iubire, \u015ftiu foarte clar c\u0103 nu va fi nimic niciodat\u0103. <\/p>\n

Nu am<\/strong> dat mesaje incoerente la be\u0163ie. <\/p>\n

Am dou\u0103 tipuri de be\u0163ie. Be\u0163ia social\u0103 \u015fi be\u0163ia singuratic\u0103. Be\u0163ia mea social\u0103 este mai cizelat\u0103 dec\u00e2t o sculptur\u0103 renascentist\u0103, pentru c\u0103 \u00eei respect prea mult de oameni \u015fi timpul lor cu mine s\u0103 le vomit pe bocanci. Be\u0163ia mea social\u0103 se opre\u015fte \u00een momentul \u00een care vine valul \u015fi d\u0103 s\u0103-mi ia calul. \u00cen acel moment, be\u0163ia mea social\u0103 se urc\u0103 \u00eentr-un taxi, cu de\u0163in\u0103tor cu tot, \u015fi se duce frumu\u015fel ac\u0103sic\u0103. Unde se continu\u0103 cu be\u0163ia singuratic\u0103. Iar aceasta are loc la o distan\u0163\u0103 sigur\u0103 de mijloace de comunicare la distan\u0163\u0103.
\nPrefer s\u0103 m\u0103 dezbrac de caracter \u00een singur\u0103tate, cu un singur martor 100% discret, iar acela e Pulic\u0103 Splendoaremaxim\u0103, de profesie pisic. <\/p>\n

Nu am<\/strong> insistat c\u00e2nd cineva m-a anun\u0163at c\u0103 m\u0103 p\u0103r\u0103se\u015fte. <\/p>\n

C\u00e2nd cineva \u00ee\u0163i spune c\u0103 te p\u0103r\u0103se\u015fte, exist\u0103 dou\u0103 variante. Versiunea \u00een care chiar a g\u0103sit iarb\u0103 mai verde \u00een alt\u0103 parte. Sau pe cineva care-i face fela\u0163ie f\u0103r\u0103 din\u0163i. Moment \u00een care nu po\u0163i dec\u00e2t s\u0103 te bucuri din inim\u0103 de fericirea omului \u015fi s\u0103-l la\u015fi s\u0103-\u015fi urmeze interesul.
\n\u015ei versiunea B. \u00cen care \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103 te joace. Chestie pe care S\u0103get\u0103torul n-o tolereaz\u0103. S\u0103get\u0103torul are o form\u0103 de onestitate fa\u0163\u0103 de persoanele apropiate, \u015fi forma asta de onestitate implic\u0103 zero jocule\u0163e de strategie, suprema\u0163ie, fente, pase, \u015fmecherii. De aceea, pentru un S\u0103get\u0103tor, \u00eencercarea de a-l juca de parc\u0103 ar fi hopa hopa Penelopa duce la o imens\u0103, glorioas\u0103 \u015fi \u00eenfloritoare muie.
\n“Du-te cu Domnul” nu e doar expresia preferat\u0103 a belgienilor, ci \u015fi a mea. <\/p>\n

Nu am<\/strong> vrut o personalitate public\u0103 pe care s\u0103 vrei neap\u0103rat s-o ag\u0103\u0163i, respectiv s-o fu\u0163i. <\/p>\n

De aceea, c\u00e2nd primesc mesaje private de la str\u0103ini cu “Mi-ar pl\u0103cea s\u0103 ie\u015fim la o cafea” mi se scoal\u0103 p\u0103rul din anus. Pentru c\u0103 realizez ce bordel fabulos ar fi putut deschide alta, care s\u0103 aib\u0103 datele mele, combinate cu o minte mai orientat\u0103 spre rezultate imediate. E practic o avere poten\u0163ial\u0103 care se risipe\u015fte aiurea \u00een timp ce eu \u00eendemn pa\u015fnic gigeii s\u0103-mi citeasc\u0103 textele, s\u0103 le comenteze inteligent, dac\u0103 e posibil, \u015fi stupid, dac\u0103 nu i-a dotat Dumnezeu cu mai mult. <\/p>\n

Nu am<\/strong> visat s\u0103 fiu nevast\u0103. <\/p>\n

Pare prea mult efort devotat unor scopuri m\u0103runte \u015fi \u00een mare parte extrem de plictisitoare. \u015ei mai ales, sunt destule care exceleaz\u0103 \u00een scopuri m\u0103runte \u015fi extrem de plictisitoare. “To do”-ul zilnic al unor oameni m-ar putea b\u0103ga la sec\u0163ia vesel\u0103 \u00een doi timpi \u015fi trei mi\u015fc\u0103ri. <\/p>\n

Nu am<\/strong> ars-o competitiv. <\/p>\n

\u00cei \u015ftii pe oamenii competitivi din via\u0163a ta. \u0102ia care o au perpetuu mai lung\u0103, mai groas\u0103 \u015fi mai cu crengi dec\u00e2t o ai tu. Dac\u0103 tu \u0163i-ai luat ceva nou de la H&M, ei \u015fi-au luat din colec\u0163ia exclusiv\u0103 Venera Arapu. Dac\u0103 tu \u0163i-ai luat o sticl\u0103 de vin de 30 de lei, ei \u015fi-au luat una de Dom Perignon. Dac\u0103 tu ai luat o boal\u0103 transmisibil\u0103 sexual, ei au luat direct SIDA \u015fi sifilis direct \u00een stadiul al treilea. Pe scurt, orice faci tu, ei f\u0103ceau cu zece ani \u00eenainte s\u0103 faci tu, desigur c\u0103 excelau, \u015fi nu le e foarte clar ce cau\u0163i tu \u00een via\u0163a ta.
\nIar eu m\u0103 \u00eentreb: Oare oamenii \u0103\u015ftia b\u0103nuiesc c\u00e2nd de infinit de detestabili sunt de fapt? Cum toat\u0103 lumea vede prin tentativa lor de suprema\u0163ie \u015fi se pi\u015f\u0103 pe ei cu jet? <\/p>\n

Nu am<\/strong> purtat pic\u0103 dac\u0103 un om care mi-a f\u0103cut un c\u0103cat \u015fi-a recunoscut mizeria \u015fi \u015fi-a cerut scuze. <\/p>\n

Mi se pare c\u0103 e nevoie de un nivel de m\u00e2r\u015f\u0103vie la care eu una nu aspir, s\u0103 dai jet la scuzele cuiva. Treci cu vederea \u015fi mergi \u00eenainte. P\u0103rerea de r\u0103u e cel mai nobil sentiment al unui om, desigur dup\u0103 dona\u0163ia de Paypal. (Pentru zg\u00e2rcel care n-a donat niciodat\u0103, dar \u00eemi face c\u00e2te o dram\u0103 \u00een comentarii de c\u00e2te ori aduc vorba: Glum\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103. \u015etiu c\u0103 n-o s\u0103 donezi, a\u015fa cum \u015ftii \u015fi tu c\u0103 n-o s\u0103 donezi. Sunt relaxat\u0103 \u00een privin\u0163a asta. Nu te criza aiurea ca prostu’ pe sat. Cel mult te iau la sictir c\u00e2nd tu, \u00een calitatea ta de nedonator, \u00eemi vii cu nazuri de genul: “Textul de azi nu m-a satisf\u0103cut.” Nazurile astea se pot face c\u00e2nd ai pe ce s\u0103 te bazezi. Nu sunt Sephora s\u0103racului, s\u0103 vii s\u0103 faci fi\u0163e la mine pentru c\u0103 n-ai bani s\u0103 str\u00e2mbi din nas la Sephora, c\u0103 mostrele lor de la Clinique sunt un rahat plutitor.)
\nRevin: p\u0103rerea de r\u0103u e cel mai nobil sentiment al unui om. E bine s\u0103 ier\u0163i pentru c\u0103 nu \u015ftii niciodat\u0103 \u00een ce incendiu \u00ee\u015fi pierde \u0103la via\u0163a, \u015fi o s\u0103 suferi c\u0103 era\u0163i certa\u0163i c\u00e2nd a murit. <\/p>\n

Nu am<\/strong> cedat la pis\u0103logeal\u0103. <\/p>\n

Zilele trecute m\u0103 sun\u0103 un nene cu care am o colaborare de la distan\u0163\u0103, dar una relativ mic\u0103 \u015fi insignifiant\u0103. M\u0103 freac\u0103 la cap o jum\u0103tate de or\u0103 pe ceas, cu p\u0103l\u0103vr\u0103geal\u0103 \u00eengrozitooooor de plictisitoare. Fa\u0163\u0103 de oamenii \u00een urma c\u0103rora c\u00e2\u015ftig bani am un cod de protocol n+1, care implic\u0103 s\u0103 nu hackuiesc p\u0103l\u0103vr\u0103geala cu “m\u0103 scuza\u0163i, acum intru \u00een opera\u0163ie, \u00eemi pun o pereche de s\u00e2ni \u00een plus”, cum fac de obicei c\u00e2nd cineva m\u0103 freac\u0103 la icre neproductiv.
\nBun, \u015fi dup\u0103 ce m\u0103 seac\u0103 interminabil cu toate inep\u0163iile posibile \u015fi imposibile, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi pun\u0103 m\u0103car pre\u0163 de o secund\u0103 \u00eentrebarea: “oare plictisesc”, nenea \u0103sta trece la “\u015ftii c\u0103 e\u015fti o persoan\u0103 foarte distant\u0103 \u015fi superioar\u0103”.
\n“Cum cum cum? \u015ei efortul meu de a te \u00eendura p\u00e2n\u0103 acum nu se pune? OK, \u00eemi cer scuze profunde c\u0103 \u0163i-am ascultat bullshitul. N-o s\u0103 se mai \u00eent\u00e2mple”.
\nUnii oameni chiar nu intuiesc p\u00e2n\u0103 unde s\u0103 abuzeze. <\/p>\n

Voi ce nu a\u0163i f\u0103cut niciodat\u0103? <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Nu am tras de b\u0103rba\u0163i pentru care nu eram \u00een mod vizibil op\u0163iunea num\u0103rul 1. A\u0163i zice c\u0103 e vorba de orgoliu. Dar de...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9560,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11766","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/facebook.jpg?fit=500%2C434&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11766","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11766"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11766\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11770,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11766\/revisions\/11770"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9560"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11766"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11766"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11766"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}