{"id":12062,"date":"2017-02-14T12:26:37","date_gmt":"2017-02-14T09:26:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=12062"},"modified":"2017-02-14T16:49:32","modified_gmt":"2017-02-14T13:49:32","slug":"ultimul-metrou-spre-berceni","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/ultimul-metrou-spre-berceni\/","title":{"rendered":"Ultimul metrou spre Berceni"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>\u015etiu c\u0103 n-am scris o povestire erotic\u0103 de ceva vreme. Dar e Valentine&#8217;s Day, \u015fi de Valentine&#8217;s Day, to\u0163i suntem mai buni, sau dac\u0103 nu, m\u0103car mai lubrifia\u0163i. Dac\u0103 a\u015f fi avut un vin ro\u015fu s\u0103-mi sponsorizeze blogul, a\u015f fi precizat aici: Scris\u0103 sub influen\u0163a. Din p\u0103cate, influen\u0163a va r\u0103m\u00e2ne \u00een acest caz anonim\u0103 \u015fi ne\u015ftiut\u0103 de nimeni. <\/em><\/p>\n<p>Domnul Costel ie\u015fise t\u00e2rziu de la munc\u0103. Prin valul de oboseal\u0103 plumburie care i se rev\u0103rsa peste oase, era fericit. \u00cei pl\u0103cea s\u0103 g\u0103teasc\u0103. \u00cei pl\u0103cea s\u0103 fac\u0103 o friptur\u0103 dup\u0103 alta, s\u0103 prepare oale mari de ciorb\u0103, s\u0103 soteze diverse legume \u015fi s\u0103 bat\u0103 piureul de cartofi. \u00cei pl\u0103cea s\u0103 striveasc\u0103 ingredientele \u015fi s\u0103 le supun\u0103 for\u0163ei lui brute, s\u0103 le transforme \u00een sosuri \u015fi creme. \u00cei pl\u0103cea s\u0103 dea de m\u00e2ncare fl\u0103m\u00e2nzilor. O tur\u0103 de 12 ore, cu m\u00e2ini pline de arsuri la final, era pentru el o felie de via\u0163\u0103. Intens\u0103, tr\u0103it\u0103 cu bucurie.<br \/>\nOboseala lui era fericire. Fericirea lui era oboseal\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>Trecuser\u0103 de Pia\u0163a Sudului, \u015fi din metrou cobor\u00e2se aproape toat\u0103 popula\u0163ia. F\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 vrea, privirea i se strecur\u0103 spre doamna de vizavi. Foarte zvelt\u0103, filiform\u0103, incredibil de feminin\u0103, \u00eentr-o rochie portocalie tricotat\u0103 \u015fi pufoas\u0103 cu g\u00e2t \u00eenalt, care \u00eei m\u00e2ng\u00e2ia b\u0103rbia fin\u0103, de zei\u0163\u0103, \u015fi care se termina cu o palm\u0103 deasupra cizmelor crem, din piele \u00eentoars\u0103. Paltonul era \u015fi el pufos, de un portocaliu mai deschis dec\u00e2t rochia tricotat\u0103. \u00cel desf\u0103cuse. Era cald \u00een metrou. Ce femeie elegant\u0103; se uit\u0103 domnul Costel la ea cu poft\u0103. Apoi se g\u00e2ndi la Mariana care-l a\u015ftepta acas\u0103, l\u0103f\u0103it\u0103-n fotoliu, cu o pung\u0103 mare de covrigi sprijinit\u0103 \u00eentre pliul al treilea \u015fi al patrulea al b\u0103rbiei, uit\u00e2ndu-se la un talk show unde toat\u0103 lumea \u0163ipa \u00eenc\u0103lecat &#8211; \u015fi nu, nu \u00een sensul porno al cuv\u00e2ntului.<br \/>\nParc\u0103 nu-\u0163i vine s\u0103 crezi c\u0103 \u015fi Mariana, \u015fi fiin\u0163a asta creat\u0103 dintr-o fantezie de puf \u015fi parfum apar\u0163in aceleia\u015fi rase \u015fi aceluia\u015fi gen. Sigur, minimum una era mutant\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;La dracu&#8221;, \u00ee\u015fi repro\u015f\u0103 domnul Costel, &#8220;de ce s\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc r\u0103u de Mariana, c\u00e2nd \u015fi eu, de c\u00e2nd am devenit chef, zici c\u0103 m-a proiectat Anca Petrescu?&#8221;<br \/>\nDomnul Costel era trecut de 40 de ani \u015fi \u015ftia cine coordonase construc\u0163ia Casei Poporului.<\/p>\n<p>La Ap\u0103r\u0103torii Patriei, au cobor\u00e2t cuplul de pensionari care st\u0103tuser\u0103 vizavi de el, pe banca femeii, \u015fi cei patru studen\u0163i chicotitori care \u00eei \u0163inuser\u0103 companie pe banca lui. Era singur cu ea, pe acea por\u0163iune de metrou. Doar ei doi, f\u0103r\u0103 o umbrel\u0103. Acum ar fi momentul lui. Dac\u0103 ar avea 30 de kilograme \u015fi o Marian\u0103 mai pu\u0163in. Dac\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>-Pot s\u0103 m\u0103 a\u015fez l\u00e2ng\u0103 dvs.? \u00eel \u00eentrerupse o voce feminin\u0103 pl\u0103cut\u0103.<br \/>\n-Sigur, tres\u0103ri el jenat, ro\u015fu \u015fi transpirat.<br \/>\n-Nu vreau s\u0103 v\u0103 deranjez, dar e at\u00e2t de pustiu metroul.<br \/>\n-Da&#8230; da, da, a\u015fa e.<br \/>\n-E o sear\u0103 pl\u0103cut\u0103, nu? continu\u0103 femeia pe un ton amabil \u015fi catifelat, perfect asortat la hainele ei fluffy.<br \/>\n-Din ce \u00een ce mai pl\u0103cut\u0103, se adun\u0103 domnul Costel, pip\u0103indu-se pe interior s\u0103 identifice o pereche de testicule despre care nu era foarte sigur c\u0103 nu slujesc doar de decor.<br \/>\n-P\u0103re\u0163i o persoan\u0103 foarte puternic\u0103, remarc\u0103 femeia, \u015fi domnul Costel nu fu sigur dac\u0103 era un compliment sau o ironie perfect mascat\u0103.<br \/>\n-Eu&#8230; da, ca buc\u0103tar trebuie s\u0103&#8230; Sunt lucruri care cer for\u0163\u0103.<br \/>\n-\u015eti\u0163i, mie \u00eemi plac mult b\u0103rba\u0163ii masivi ca dumneavoastr\u0103.<br \/>\n&#8220;Ceeeee?&#8221;<br \/>\n-Da. M\u0103 rugam s\u0103 nu cobor\u00e2\u0163i. Speram s\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2nem pu\u0163in singuri, pentru c\u0103 v-am ochit de cum am urcat \u00een metrou.<br \/>\n-P&#8230; pe mine, doamn\u0103?<br \/>\nFemeia \u00eel privi la fel de fluffy, cum \u00eei vorbise.<br \/>\n-Par neserioas\u0103, domnule?<br \/>\n-Nu. Asta nu. A\u015f zice c\u0103&#8230;<br \/>\n-De cum v-am v\u0103zut, am avut aceast\u0103 viziune a celor 140 de kilograme ale dumneavoastr\u0103&#8230;<br \/>\n-132 \u015fi zece grame, o corect\u0103 domnul Costel u\u015for r\u0103nit \u00een orgoliu.<br \/>\n-M\u0103 rog, detalii.<br \/>\n-Ba nu-s detalii, doamn\u0103. Sunt opt kilograme. Opt kilograme teribil de u\u015for de acumulat \u015fi \u00eengrozitor de grele de lep\u0103dat.<br \/>\n-Sigur. V\u0103 \u00een\u0163eleg chinul. Ce voiam s\u0103 zic c\u0103 de c\u00e2nd v-am v\u0103zut, am avut aceast\u0103 viziune a celor 140 de kilograme ale dumneavoastr\u0103 strivindu-mi paloarea vizibil\u0103 \u015fi foarte fragil\u0103.<br \/>\nB\u0103rbatul r\u0103mase \u00een\u0163epenit. Dimitrie Leonida era sta\u0163ia lui. La zece minute de mers, \u00eel a\u015fteptau Mariana \u015fi covrigii. Dar c\u00e2nd auzi una ca asta, \u00ee\u0163i ui\u0163i destina\u0163ia.<br \/>\n-Poftim?<br \/>\n-Da, poftesc. Mi-ar pl\u0103cea s\u0103 v\u0103 am deasupra \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 demola\u0163i sub greutatea dumneavoastr\u0103. O curiozitate: o ave\u0163i at\u00e2t de groas\u0103 precum&#8230; pe formatul dumneavoastr\u0103 fizic?<br \/>\n\u00cen ochii femeii, toat\u0103 \u015fleahta lui Belzebut juca hora unirii. Pe de o parte, ar fi trebuit s\u0103 se simt\u0103 ofensat. Nimeni nu-i luase greutatea corporal\u0103 peste picior \u00een halul \u0103sta. Pe de alta&#8230; dac\u0103 tipa vorbea serios.<br \/>\n-Nu-mi place s\u0103 m\u0103 laud, doamn\u0103, \u015fuier\u0103 el printre din\u0163ii \u00eencle\u015fta\u0163i. V\u0103 pot demonstra.<br \/>\nFemeia \u00ee\u015fi puse lin palmele pe g\u00e2tul lui.<br \/>\n-La c\u00e2t e de gros \u015fi de tare, zic c\u0103&#8230; sunte\u0163i propor\u0163ional. Vre\u0163i s\u0103 m\u0103&#8230; fisura\u0163i pe interior?<br \/>\n-La prima, nu?<br \/>\n-La prima, da. E cap\u0103tul de linie, nebunaticule.<br \/>\nB\u0103rbatul o s\u0103rut\u0103 fl\u0103m\u00e2nd pe buzele roz, pline, apetisante.<br \/>\n-Te voi demola, p\u0103pu\u015f\u0103. Te voi rupe \u00een dou\u0103. O s\u0103 vezi.<br \/>\nFemeia respira deja \u00eentret\u0103iat. \u00ce\u015fi puse m\u00e2na pe coapsa ei \u015fi d\u0103du s\u0103 urce. Ea \u00eel opri.<br \/>\n-Cum te cheam\u0103?<br \/>\n-Costel.<br \/>\n-Costel, mai trebuie s\u0103-\u0163i spun ceva despre mine \u00eenainte s\u0103 cobor\u00e2m. E cinstit s\u0103 \u015ftii.<br \/>\n&#8220;O fi vr\u00e2nd bani? O fi t\u00e2rf\u0103? Nu conteaz\u0103. Orice pentru c\u00e2t de tare m-a \u00eent\u0103r\u00e2tat&#8221;, \u00ee\u015fi spuse el, puls\u00e2nd din r\u0103runchi.<br \/>\n-Bine. Costele&#8230;<br \/>\nFlutur\u0103 din gene.<br \/>\n-Realitatea e c\u0103, \u00eenainte s\u0103 m\u0103 atingi acolo&#8230;<br \/>\n&#8220;O fi virgin\u0103?&#8221;<br \/>\n-Trebuie s\u0103 \u015ftii c\u0103 avem acelea\u015fi organe sexuale. M\u0103 cheam\u0103 Eusebiu.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u015etiu c\u0103 n-am scris o povestire erotic\u0103 de ceva vreme. Dar e Valentine&#8217;s Day, \u015fi de Valentine&#8217;s Day, to\u0163i suntem mai buni, sau dac\u0103&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":12063,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12062","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/metrou.jpg?fit=750%2C500&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12062","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12062"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12062\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12195,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12062\/revisions\/12195"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12063"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12062"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12062"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12062"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}