{"id":12371,"date":"2017-03-29T09:08:33","date_gmt":"2017-03-29T06:08:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=12371"},"modified":"2018-03-29T12:19:36","modified_gmt":"2018-03-29T09:19:36","slug":"aceste-clisee-ne-dor-daca-nu-mi-dai-likeuri-de-ce-esti-in-lista-mea","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/aceste-clisee-ne-dor-daca-nu-mi-dai-likeuri-de-ce-esti-in-lista-mea\/","title":{"rendered":"Aceste cli\u015fee ne dor: “Dac\u0103 nu-mi dai likeuri, de ce e\u015fti \u00een lista mea”"},"content":{"rendered":"

Not\u0103: M-au corectat c\u00e2\u0163iva prieteni: Lorena, de ce nu la\u015fi parafraza corect\u0103, cu “Aceste cli\u015fee ne doare?” R\u0103spuns: pentru c\u0103 internetul geme de antihaji sini\u015ftri care ar avea impresia c\u0103 dup\u0103 patru c\u0103r\u0163i \u015fi zece ani de jurnalism ai nevoie de lec\u0163ioare de gramatic\u0103 \u015fi mai bine evit\u0103m. <\/em><\/p>\n

Nu \u015ftiu ce e cu influens\u0103rii din lista mea, dar \u00een ultima vreme remarc aceea\u015fi \u00eengrijorare la din ce \u00een ce mai mul\u0163i dintre ei. To\u0163i lanseaz\u0103 \u00een eter \u00eentrebarea: Oare de ce sta\u0163i \u00een lista mea de prieteni, dac\u0103 nu reac\u0163iona\u0163i la ceea ce fac?
\n\u015ei de fiecare dat\u0103, reac\u0163ia mea este: H\u0103? De ce se presupune c\u0103 un om care \u00ee\u0163i cite\u015fte – sau nu – textele, \u00ee\u0163i vede – sau nu – fotografiile, face o lab\u0103 – sau nu – cu tine ca partener imaginar trebuie musai s\u0103 comenteze, l\u0103icuiasc\u0103, dea semne c\u0103 exist\u0103?<\/p>\n

Eu nu sunt un influens\u0103r. \u00cen sensul c\u0103 nimeni, niciodat\u0103, nu \u015fi-a schimbat via\u0163a, p\u0103rerea despre univers, drepturile omului, drepturile c\u00e2inelui, drepturile p\u0103durilor din Carpa\u0163i \u015fi orice alt subiect doar citindu-m\u0103 pe mine. Cel mult i-am adunat \u00eentr-o comunitate pe cei care vedeau la fel aceste probleme, A PRIORI. Nu e cu nimic meritul meu. Dac\u0103 nu era gardul meu, era gardul vecinului.<\/p>\n

Dar niciodat\u0103, niciodat\u0103 nu am provocat reac\u0163ii cer\u00e2ndu-le. Niciodat\u0103 nu am sim\u0163it c\u0103 e cazul s\u0103-\u0163i urechezi cititorii c\u0103 nu se bag\u0103 \u00een seam\u0103 cu tine.<\/p>\n

A fost \u00een istoria acestui blog o perioad\u0103 c\u00e2nd am aplicat o teorie care a pornit de la tabloide \u015fi s-a l\u0103b\u0103r\u0163at pe la toate revistele cu \u015fefi sp\u0103la\u0163i pe creier: “Las\u0103 s\u0103 zic\u0103 oricine orice. E democra\u0163ie.”
\nRezultatul a fost c\u0103 sec\u0163iunea mea de comentarii era acaparat\u0103 de aceia\u015fi cinci gher\u0163oi pe care-i puleam iar \u015fi iar, \u00een ripost\u0103 la mitoc\u0103niile lor, rubrica de comentarii era un infinit r\u0103zboi, ca un teritoriu invadat de ISIS, \u015fi de\u015fi statisticile \u00eemi ar\u0103tau zilnic 2.000 de cititori, restul de 1.995 t\u0103ceau pentru c\u0103 nu exista un climat agreabil comunic\u0103rii.<\/p>\n

Momentul revela\u0163iei, c\u00e2nd am constatat c\u0103 t\u0103cerea nu e totuna cu neimplicare, \u015fi faptul c\u0103 un om nu d\u0103 like nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 absolut nimic, a fost cel \u00een care am setat contul de Paypal al blogului. Dar real, mi-a c\u0103zut fa\u0163a. A plouat cu dona\u0163ii, dar nici din gre\u015feal\u0103 de la \u0103ia cu gura c\u00e2t \u015fura, care te frecau la icre p\u00e2n\u0103 la epuizare \u015fi-\u0163i puneau nervii pe bigudiuri. Nicidecum. Ci de la exact cei din zona t\u0103cut\u0103 a listei, cei care nu se certau cu tine, nu te interogau ca la poli\u0163ie, nu-\u0163i jurau iubire etern\u0103, nu erau omniprezen\u0163i \u015fi omniscien\u0163i ca \u00eensu\u015fi Dumnezeu p\u0103rintele celor v\u0103zute \u015fi nev\u0103zute.<\/p>\n

Pe baza “cur\u0103\u0163eniei \u00een list\u0103” (mam\u0103 c\u00e2t ur\u0103sc no\u0163iunea asta de “cur\u0103\u0163enie \u00een list\u0103”, de parc\u0103 oamenii ar fi vechituri de aruncat la gunoi), probabil c\u0103 influens\u0103rii \u0103\u015ftia dispera\u0163i \u00ee\u015fi sacrific\u0103 de fapt fanii adev\u0103ra\u0163i.<\/p>\n

Alt moment de revela\u0163ie a fost c\u00e2nd am \u00eenceput s\u0103 umblu cu evenimente prin \u0163ar\u0103. Nici pomeneal\u0103 s\u0103-i vezi pe \u0103ia cu gura mare, care \u00ee\u0163i m\u00e2ncau tone de timp frec\u00e2ndu-te la cap cu mesaje private pe teme pe care tu le tratai public. Numai fe\u0163e necunoscute. “Ne avem pe Facebook, dar nu-\u0163i comentez c\u0103 nu mi se pare c\u0103 am ceva interesant de spus.”<\/p>\n

Chestia asta m-a f\u0103cut s\u0103 \u00een\u0163eleg ceea ce b\u0103nuiam deja, \u015fi anume: t\u0103cerea unui om nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 dezinteres. \u00censeamn\u0103 doar c\u0103 nu-l \u00eenc\u00e2nt\u0103 s\u0103 fluture public din sine \u00eensu\u015fi. Dar – \u015fi acesta e cel mai important dar – \u00eei pas\u0103 de ceea ce faci tu \u015fi vrea s\u0103 fie parte component\u0103 a fenomenului “tu”.<\/p>\n

De aceea, \u00eei \u00eencurajez c\u0103lduros pe oamenii care nu simt nevoia s\u0103 aib\u0103 reac\u0163ie cu tot dinadinsul s\u0103 stea lini\u015fti\u0163i \u015fi s\u0103 bea o bere citindu-m\u0103, cum o fac mereu. Sus\u0163inerea voastr\u0103 se vede \u015fi se simte \u00een fapte concrete. \u015ei e singura care m\u0103 intereseaz\u0103 de fapt.<\/p>\n

\u015ei-i \u00eencurajez pe influens\u0103ri s\u0103 pun\u0103 problema un pic diferit: Utilitate vs. Daun\u0103.
\nUtilitate: e primul interesat de un nou produs al t\u0103u, caut\u0103 s\u0103 ajute oricum \u00eei st\u0103 cu putin\u0163\u0103, \u00eel sim\u0163i c\u0103 e al\u0103turi de tine, se bucur\u0103 de succesele tale.
\nDaun\u0103: Face balamuc infinit \u00een comentarii, caut\u0103 s\u0103 te frece la icre cu t\u00e2mpenii sinistre \u00een mesaje private, caut\u0103 s\u0103 se certe cu al\u0163i comentatori ai t\u0103i, \u00ee\u0163i acapareaz\u0103 spa\u0163iul, are mereu instruc\u0163iuni de dat pe investi\u0163ia altora.<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103 dauna dep\u0103\u015fe\u015fte utilitatea, da\u0163i-le block. Cur\u0103\u0163a\u0163i-v\u0103 vie\u0163ile de stres inutil, care nu se revan\u015feaz\u0103 cu nimic.
\n“Dar o s\u0103 pierd cititori”.
\nNu. Dimpotriv\u0103. Dup\u0103 ce am izgonit mui\u015ftii, \u015fi atmosfera din rubrica de comentarii a devenit predominant relaxat\u0103 \u015fi prietenoas\u0103, num\u0103rul de cititori s-a triplat. \u015ei \u00eencetul cu \u00eencetul, au \u00eenceput s\u0103 aib\u0103 reac\u0163ie \u015fi “cei buni”. C\u0103 nu mai exista stresul democra\u0163iei prost \u00een\u0163elese.<\/p>\n

*<\/p>\n

\u015ei ca fun fact: ieri sear\u0103 \u00eemi scrie o duduie care m\u0103 scosese din list\u0103 pe acela\u015fi motiv, c\u0103 nu \u00eei d\u0103deam reac\u0163ii la peretele ei compus predominant din m\u00e2ncare neinteresant aranjat\u0103, prost fotografiat\u0103 \u015fi medita\u0163ie popt\u0103ma\u015fic\u0103. A se \u00een\u0163elege: nu m\u0103 deranja c\u0103 posta lucrurile astea. Sunt con\u015ftient\u0103 c\u0103 nu era entertainerul meu privat pl\u0103tit. Pur \u015fi simplu, nu era nimic care s\u0103 merite o reac\u0163ie pe acolo.
\nA\u015fadar, \u00eemi scrie prin\u0163esa:
\n“Vrei s\u0103 ne re\u00eemprietenim?”
\nEu nici n-am observat c\u0103 ne-am desprietenit, \u00eei zic eu.
\n“Te-am scos eu c\u0103 nu-mi reac\u0163ionai.”
\nA, deci am c\u0103zut prad\u0103 unei “cur\u0103\u0163enii”, zic eu. \u015ei de ce s\u0103 reciclezi gunoi o dat\u0103 aruncat?
\n(\u00centre noi fie vorba, eu respect dreptul oricui s\u0103 m\u0103 scoat\u0103 din list\u0103 \u015fi nu alerg dup\u0103 nimeni s\u0103 m\u0103 lamentez, dar odat\u0103 ce m-ai scos f\u0103r\u0103 motiv bine \u00eentemeiat, nu m\u0103 mai vezi \u00eenapoi. Cur\u0103\u0163enie faci cu m\u0103-ta \u015fi apropia\u0163ii.)
\n“P\u0103i nu, c\u0103 tu scriai chestii amuzante \u015fi acum trebuie s\u0103 te caut pe Facebook s\u0103 le citesc”.
\nWell, eu nu sunt nici hopa Mitic\u0103, nici hopa hopa Penelopa, nici vibrator cu \u015fase viteze, s\u0103 m\u0103 bagi \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 sco\u0163i dup\u0103 pofta inimii tale. Data viitoare fii mai precaut\u0103 c\u00e2nd faci cur\u0103\u0163enii, i-am zis.
\nS-a sup\u0103rat flea\u015fc\u0103. Tot ea.
\n“S\u0103 \u015ftii c\u0103 nu te mai citesc!”
\nOh, vai. Ce m\u0103 fac f\u0103r\u0103 contribu\u0163ia ta lunar\u0103 de zero euro \u015fi zero eurocen\u0163i, am oftat eu a jale. \u015ei pentru c\u0103 d\u0103dea typing \u015fi mi-era clar c\u0103 ar fi urmat panaram\u0103 stupid\u0103 p\u00e2n\u0103 diminea\u0163a, i-am dat block.
\nNope, nu faci panar\u0103mi de muiere nefutut\u0103 pe timpul valoros al Lorenei fucking Lupu. Mai ales c\u00e2nd ai zero motive obiective s\u0103 emi\u0163i preten\u0163ii la timpul numitei.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Not\u0103: M-au corectat c\u00e2\u0163iva prieteni: Lorena, de ce nu la\u015fi parafraza corect\u0103, cu “Aceste cli\u015fee ne doare?” R\u0103spuns: pentru c\u0103 internetul geme de antihaji...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":11266,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12371","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/mitz.jpg?fit=1920%2C1200&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12371","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12371"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12371\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14630,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12371\/revisions\/14630"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/11266"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12371"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12371"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12371"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}