{"id":13308,"date":"2017-09-16T10:29:45","date_gmt":"2017-09-16T07:29:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=13308"},"modified":"2017-09-16T10:29:45","modified_gmt":"2017-09-16T07:29:45","slug":"trollywood-sneak-peek-1-mici-aranjamente-artistice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/trollywood-sneak-peek-1-mici-aranjamente-artistice\/","title":{"rendered":"Trollywood Sneak Peek 1: Mici aranjamente artistice"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Dup\u0103 cum v-am povestit zilele acestea, preg\u0103tim colec\u0163ia celor mai bune texte de pe blog, \u00eentr-o carte superb\u0103, pe care o pute\u0163i precomanda <a href=\"http:\/\/hyperliteratura.crestemidei.ro\/Trollywood?locale=ro\">aici<\/a>, \u015fi, dac\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2mpina\u0163i blocaje pe parcurs, pute\u0163i cere ajutor <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Trollywood.thebook\/\">aici<\/a>.<br \/>\nAcum, \u00eens\u0103, a sosit acel moment \u00een rela\u0163ia noastr\u0103, c\u00e2nd v\u0103 voi dezv\u0103lui unul dintre textele care au trecut de foarfeca cenzorului necru\u0163\u0103tor \u015fi vor vedea lumina tiparului, sau cel pu\u0163in \u00eentunericul lui. <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Mici aranjamente artistice<\/em> a v\u0103zut lumina onlineului \u015fi ura trollilor pe 10 noiembrie 2014. <\/p>\n<p>Politicianul: Bun\u0103 ziua.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul de teatru: Bun\u0103 ziua, domnule. S\u0103 \u015fti\u0163i c\u0103 a\u0163i gre\u015fit u\u015fa. Casa de bilete e al\u0103turi.<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: Eu cred c\u0103 glumi\u0163i. Ce m\u0103 intereseaz\u0103 pe mine ni\u015fte am\u0103r\u00e2te de spectacole de trei lei, pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 mega show-ul pe care-l fac eu zi de zi?<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: Da, am remarcat, dansa\u0163i ca o div\u0103 pe la emisiuni TV. De parc\u0103 a\u0163i juca \u00een echipa advers\u0103. \u015ei? Cu ce v\u0103 putem fi de folos? Vre\u0163i s\u0103 ne propune\u0163i un spectacol de salsa?<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: E o idee! Bine, dar nu chiar acum c\u0103 sunt \u00een alegeri \u015fi trebuie s\u0103 par b\u0103iat serios. De fapt, de asta am venit.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: Adic\u0103? S\u0103 v\u0103 \u00eenv\u0103\u0163 eu cum s\u0103 fi\u0163i serios? Nici eu nu \u015ftiu, stimabile. Am doar figura asta impozant\u0103 \u015fi vocea bine timbrat\u0103, care m\u0103 avantajeaz\u0103. Dar nu m\u0103 cita\u0163i nic\u0103ieri, c\u0103 v\u0103 dau \u00een judecat\u0103 pentru calomnie.<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: Sta\u0163i lini\u015ftit. Unu, c\u0103 deja v-am \u00eenregistrat. \u015ei doi, nu m\u0103 intereseaz\u0103 aceste futilit\u0103\u0163i. Problema mea este urm\u0103toarea: am un renume absolut st\u00e2njenitor, de preferat al oligofrenilor \u015fi al analfabe\u0163ilor, \u015fi vreau s\u0103 schimb asta.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: De ce? Nu v\u0103 e clar \u00een ce \u0163ar\u0103 tr\u0103i\u0163i? La c\u00e2t a\u0163i furat, a\u015f zice c\u0103 v\u0103 e foarte clar. Oricum, oligofrenii \u015fi analfabe\u0163ii sunt majoritatea.<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: Da, bine. \u015ei mie-mi convine de fapt, dac\u0103 vre\u0163i s\u0103 fiu sincer. Dar nu te po\u0163i \u00eenconjura doar cu Nicu\u015for de la Br\u0103ila \u015fi Beyonce de Rom\u00e2nia \u00een drumul spre al optsprezecelea Congres. Optsprezece, nu? Parc\u0103 aici se oprise num\u0103r\u0103toarea.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: Domnul meu, eu sunt actor. Singurele cifre pe care le \u0163in minte sunt onorariile cu care sunt pl\u0103tit! Zi ce dore\u015fti de la mine, c\u0103 am de dat un interviu \u00een zece minute \u015fi-mi place s\u0103 fiu punctual.<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: Am nevoie de sus\u0163inere de la intelectuali.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: \u015ei ce, actorii sunt intelectuali?<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: Conteaz\u0103? Important e c\u0103 pot memora \u015fi recita credibil orice, inclusiv citate pompoase \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu subiectul.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: A\u015fa e. C\u00e2nd auzi un actor bun gl\u0103suind, mai c\u0103-l crezi c\u0103 \u015ftie despre ce vorbe\u015fte. P\u0103i, pe tineri nu \u0163i-i pot da, c\u0103 \u0103\u015ftia-s mereu pe fug\u0103 dup\u0103 \u015fu\u015fe. \u015ei nici nu-i vrei, c\u0103 sunt celebri mai mult peste hotare, \u00een \u0163ar\u0103 nu-i \u015ftie nimeni. Dar am colec\u0163ia de mon\u015ftri sacri. Care chiar pot s\u0103 par\u0103 intelectuali, dac\u0103 se str\u0103duiesc. Au \u015fi c\u00e2teva citate din Jean \u2013 Paul Sartre \u00een carne\u0163elul de partid.<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: Sun\u0103 interesant.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: Chiar este. Tot stau acas\u0103 \u015fi se pl\u00e2ng c\u0103 pensia e mic\u0103 \u015fi c\u0103 nu joac\u0103 nimic. N-au nicio scuz\u0103 s\u0103 nu pun\u0103 osul la treab\u0103.<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: P\u0103i da. Rolul vie\u0163ii lor: acela de fanii mei.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: O \u00eentrebare totu\u015fi: n-o s\u0103 par\u0103 suspect c\u0103 sunt to\u0163i de la acela\u015fi teatru?<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul: Neaaa! La c\u00e2t sunt de pro\u015fti rom\u00e2nii, nici n-o s\u0103 se prind\u0103.<br \/>\n\tDirectorul: V\u0103d c\u0103 g\u00e2ndi\u0163i deja ca un pre\u015fedinte, bravo! Dar \u015fti\u0163i, \u0103\u015ftia-s actori, nu se cade s\u0103 le da\u0163i doar o f\u0103in\u0103 \u015fi o sticl\u0103 de ulei.<br \/>\n\tPoliticianul (cu generozitate): Nici o problem\u0103. Se \u015ftie c\u0103 eu sunt inim\u0103 larg\u0103. Dou\u0103 sticle de ulei!<\/p>\n<p>Foto de Andrei P\u0103curaru. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dup\u0103 cum v-am povestit zilele acestea, preg\u0103tim colec\u0163ia celor mai bune texte de pe blog, \u00eentr-o carte superb\u0103, pe care o pute\u0163i precomanda aici,&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":13309,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13308","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/pinup.jpg?fit=1243%2C805&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13308","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13308"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13308\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13310,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13308\/revisions\/13310"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13309"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13308"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13308"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13308"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}