{"id":13806,"date":"2017-12-17T12:34:43","date_gmt":"2017-12-17T09:34:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=13806"},"modified":"2017-12-17T13:41:04","modified_gmt":"2017-12-17T10:41:04","slug":"interviu-imaginar-cu-regele-noptii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/interviu-imaginar-cu-regele-noptii\/","title":{"rendered":"Interviu imaginar cu Regele Nop\u0163ii"},"content":{"rendered":"

Reporterul: Ce onoare deosebit\u0103 c\u0103 discuta\u0163i cu mine. \u015etiu din film c\u0103 sunte\u0163i extrem, dar extrem de zg\u00e2rcit din punct de vedere verbal. <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Sigur, \u00een armata mor\u0163ilor nu am cum altfel. \u0102ia au sistemul auditiv erodat de procesul natural de desompunere \u015fi a\u015f irosi orzul pe g\u00e2\u015fte, s\u0103 zic a\u015fa. D\u0103-le oamenilor ce vezi c\u0103 func\u0163ioneaz\u0103.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: \u015ei \u00een cazul meu ce crede\u0163i c\u0103 func\u0163ioneaz\u0103? <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Valoarea de \u015foc, normal. M\u0103 alergai at\u00e2ta dac\u0103 nu eram un personaj negativ celebru?<\/p>\n

Reporterul: Sigur. Dac\u0103 era\u0163i personaj pozitiv celebru. <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Ca s\u0103 m\u0103 pretind personaj pozitiv c\u00e2nd se vede cu ochiul liber cum smulg via\u0163a din oameni, ar trebui s\u0103 m\u0103 fac politician rom\u00e2n.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: Hahahahaha. Ceea ce e absolut ridicol, nu-i a\u015fa? <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Deloc. De fapt, e \u00een plan dup\u0103 urm\u0103torul sezon GOT, care, \u015ftie toat\u0103 lumea, e foarte scurt \u015fi va fi despre cum acaparez eu tot Westerosul.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: AHA. \u015ei de ce exact Rom\u00e2nia? <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: \u00cent\u00e2i, au existat semnele mici. Noi nu suport\u0103m apa – nici Rom\u00e2nii n-o suport\u0103. Oastea noastr\u0103 miroase a hoit, deoarece, ei bine, e format\u0103 din hoituri. Miros pe care-l reg\u0103se\u015fti \u00een orice autobuz rom\u00e2nesc, la o or\u0103 de v\u00e2rf. Oastea noastr\u0103 ac\u0163ioneaz\u0103 ca teleghidat\u0103 dup\u0103 cum ridic eu m\u00e2inile. Lucru pe care \u00eel face, \u00een mare m\u0103sur\u0103, \u015fi popula\u0163ia Rom\u00e2niei.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: Mda, nu m\u0103 pricep, dar dac\u0103 a\u015fa zice\u0163i dumneavoastr\u0103, a\u015fa e.<\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Apoi, au ap\u0103rut semnele mijlocii. Mor\u0163ii care voteaz\u0103. Practic, Rom\u00e2nia e singura \u0163ar\u0103 unde ai drept de vot dup\u0103 ce mori, ceea ce mi se pare foarte tare. Hai cu corectitudinea politic\u0103. De ce s\u0103 fii discriminat doar pentru c\u0103, \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103tor, independent de voin\u0163a ta, ai dat ortul popii? Nu mi se pare corect. S\u0103 la\u015fi mor\u0163ii s\u0103 voteze liber e o dovad\u0103 de democra\u0163ie pioniereasc\u0103.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: Pioniereasc\u0103? \u0102\u015ftia nu erau ni\u015fte etape \u00een ierarhia comunist\u0103 sau ceva de genul? <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Doamne. Unde te duce mintea, amice. E vorba de inova\u0163ie. De reform\u0103. De faptul c\u0103 nimeni n-a v\u0103zut a\u015fa democra\u0163ie.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: A, a\u015fa da. \u015ei presupun c\u0103 urmeaz\u0103 semnele mari. <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Corect. Semnul cel mai mare este c\u0103 Rom\u00e2nia e preg\u0103tit\u0103 cu ardoare \u015fi dornic\u0103 de primul conduc\u0103tor zombi.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: Ce v\u0103 face s\u0103 afirma\u0163i asta? <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Modul \u00een care \u00ee\u015fi trateaz\u0103 cu surle, tr\u00e2mbi\u0163e \u015fi urale personalit\u0103\u0163ile, dar numai post mortem. Dac\u0103 \u00een Rom\u00e2nia contezi doar dup\u0103 moarte, e semn c\u0103 acolo e de mine.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: \u015ei care ar fi programul de guvernare? <\/em>
\nRegele Nop\u0163ii: Exact ca al Armatei Mor\u0163ilor. Le anihilez voin\u0163a \u015fi-i las s\u0103 se descompun\u0103 lent, cu ma\u0163ele la vedere. Oh, dar stai. Asta deja se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103. \u0102mm. Reformulez: S\u0103 las Rom\u00e2nia s\u0103 fie Rom\u00e2nia \u015fi periodic s\u0103-i mai dirijez ce s\u0103 distrug\u0103.<\/p>\n

Reporterul: Mult succes. <\/em>
\nRegele Mor\u0163ii: S\u0103 fie. \u015ei pentru c\u0103 te v\u0103d b\u0103iat inteligent, cam la lemnul: dup\u0103 moarte, s\u0103 \u015ftii c\u0103 ai mereu un job asigurat \u00een Rom\u00e2nia.
\nReporterul: Bine de \u015ftiut. \ud83d\ude42 <\/em><\/p>\n

Foto: HBO.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Reporterul: Ce onoare deosebit\u0103 c\u0103 discuta\u0163i cu mine. \u015etiu din film c\u0103 sunte\u0163i extrem, dar extrem de zg\u00e2rcit din punct de vedere verbal. Regele...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":13807,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13806","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/1508_promo_stills_12001692731.jpg?fit=3733%2C2100&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13806","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13806"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13806\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13811,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13806\/revisions\/13811"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13807"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13806"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13806"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13806"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}