Periodic, mama \u00eemi poveste\u015fte c\u00e2t de oribil se purta tata cu ea. Bine, tata nu era violent, nici gelos. Tata p\u0103c\u0103tuia exact \u00een direc\u0163ia opus\u0103: uita c\u0103 exist\u0103. \u00cen sesiuni, \u00ee\u015fi lua m\u00e2ncare numai pentru el. Era egoist \u015fi nep\u0103s\u0103tor. Lucrurile nu f\u0103ceau dec\u00e2t s\u0103 se agraveze, oric\u00e2t ar fi \u00eencercat ea s\u0103-l schimbe.<\/p>\n
\u015ei de fiecare dat\u0103, \u00eentrebarea mea e aceea\u015fi: \u015ei tu de ce i-ai f\u0103cut copii boului \u0103stuia sinistru?<\/p>\n
Da, \u015ftiu, practic \u00eemi pun sub semnul \u00eentreb\u0103rii propria existen\u0163\u0103. Dar crede\u0163i-m\u0103, un copil care, dup\u0103 ce se na\u015fte, nu are efectul miraculos de transformare a c\u0103pc\u0103unului \u00een F\u0103t Frumos, ci, dimpotriv\u0103, \u00eei accentueaz\u0103 tr\u0103s\u0103turile de c\u0103pc\u0103un, pentru c\u0103 o femeie cu copii deja e dependent\u0103 din toate punctele de vedere, iar un nemernic poate specula asta la cu totul alt nivel – un astfel de copil \u00ee\u015fi pune frecvent sub semnul \u00eentreb\u0103rii propria existen\u0163\u0103, mai ales c\u00e2nd e mic \u015fi simte acut c\u0103 e o povar\u0103.<\/p>\n
Idem, femeia frumoas\u0103 \u015fi delicat\u0103, Nicoleta\u00a0Bo\u0163an, care a murit ieri, \u00eenjunghiat\u0103 de monstru. I-a f\u0103cut copii. Doi. Probabil tot \u00een ideea, radical gre\u015fit\u0103, c\u0103 o s\u0103-l schimbe. \u015ei exact ca mama mea, mai mult i-a dat ap\u0103 la moar\u0103 monstrului s\u0103 o bat\u0103, s\u0103 o tortureze, s\u0103 o jigneasc\u0103.<\/p>\n
De ce femeile acestei \u0163\u0103ri aleg s\u0103 le fac\u0103 copii tuturor gunoaielor societ\u0103\u0163ii?<\/p>\n
De ce femeile acestei \u0163\u0103ri aleg s\u0103 fie legate pe tot restul vie\u0163ii, prin odrasle comune, de to\u0163i gher\u0163oii, criminalii, nesim\u0163i\u0163ii, jegurile cu ochi?<\/p>\n
De ce femeile acestei \u0163\u0103ri nu spun “stop” la primul semn al abuzului, \u015fi nu aleg singur\u0103tatea, care poate c\u0103 nu e cea mai pl\u0103cut\u0103 form\u0103 de via\u0163\u0103 pentru unii, dar m\u0103car ofer\u0103 pace \u015fi lini\u015fte?<\/p>\n
Iar r\u0103spunsul meu este: afurisita asta de educa\u0163ie secular\u0103 tradi\u0163ional\u0103 submisiv\u0103.<\/p>\n
De c\u00e2te ori, ca feti\u0163\u0103, cau\u0163i s\u0103 faci o n\u0103zb\u00e2tie, \u015fi sare c\u00e2te o bab\u0103 c\u0103, dac\u0103 faci a\u015fa, “nu te ia nimeni”. \u00cen timp ce b\u0103ie\u0163eilor nu le spune nimeni s\u0103 nu se urce-n copac c\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2n burlaci. Ei au voie orice. Noi suntem condi\u0163ionate de mici c\u0103 rostul nostru \u00een via\u0163\u0103 e s\u0103 “fim luate de cineva”.<\/p>\n
Pe Nicoleta Bo\u0163an n-a ucis-o doar jigodia bolnav\u0103 care a p\u00e2ndit-o cu cu\u0163itul \u00een m\u00e2n\u0103 s-o \u00eenjunghie, nep\u0103s\u0103toare fa\u0163\u0103 de destinul celor doi copii mici.<\/p>\n
Pe Nicoleta Bo\u0163an au ucis-o toate babele acestei \u0163\u0103ri, cu “Suport\u0103, maic\u0103, c\u0103 e\u015fti femeie”. Cu “Fii cuminte, c\u0103 altfel nu te ia nimeni”. Cu “E normal s\u0103 \u0163ipe \/ urle \/ dea, doar e b\u0103rbat.” Cu: “Cum s\u0103-l p\u0103r\u0103se\u015fti, e ru\u015fine”. Cu “Nu ne face de r\u00e2s \u00een fa\u0163a vecinilor”. Cu “Rezist\u0103 de dragul copiilor”.<\/p>\n
Am o veste pentru oricine o flutur\u0103 pe asta cu copiii: copiii \u015eTIU. Copiii nu-s animale proaste \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 discern\u0103m\u00e2nt. \u00cenc\u0103 la 3 ani, am poze \u00een care m\u0103 retrag sc\u00e2rbit\u0103 din bra\u0163ele lui taic\u0103-miu, pentru c\u0103 nep\u0103sarea lui fa\u0163\u0103 de mama \u015fi egoismul lui mi se p\u0103reau oribile. \u00cemi amintesc cum ascultam de sub mas\u0103 cum ea suna s\u0103-l \u00eentrebe pe un ton implorator c\u00e2nd ajunge acas\u0103, s\u0103 nu se r\u0103ceasc\u0103 m\u00e2ncarea, iar eu cea de patru ani \u00eel uram la culme pentru nesim\u0163irea lui, de\u015fi n-a\u015f fi putut-o formula chiar a\u015fa.<\/p>\n
Niciun copil din acest univers n-a fost vreodat\u0103 fericit \u00eentr-o familie abuziv\u0103, \u015fi rezistatul de dragul copiilor \u00eenseamn\u0103 doar expunerea prelungit\u0103 a tuturor victimelor la o traum\u0103 f\u0103r\u0103 sf\u00e2r\u015fit.<\/p>\n
Pentru c\u0103 abuzul e ca un bulg\u0103re de z\u0103pad\u0103. \u00cencepe u\u015for \u015fi, nepedepsit, se acumuleaz\u0103 ca o avalan\u015f\u0103.<\/p>\n
Pe Nicoleta Bo\u0163an a ucis-o societatea rom\u00e2neasc\u0103 tradi\u0163ional\u0103, care le educ\u0103 pe femei c\u0103 valoarea lor uman\u0103 rezid\u0103 strict \u00een supunerea fa\u0163\u0103 de “\u0103la care le ia”. \u00cen orice condi\u0163ii. Educa\u0163ia asta sinistr\u0103, care const\u0103 din extirparea unei coloane vertebrale \u015fi strivirea individualit\u0103\u0163ii.<\/p>\n
Pe Nicoleta Bo\u0163an au ucis-o legiuitorii, \u015fi legile excesiv de permisive cu violen\u0163a domestic\u0103.<\/p>\n
A ucis-o poli\u0163ia, care a sf\u0103tuit-o s\u0103 treac\u0103 b\u0103taia cu vederea.<\/p>\n
\u015ei ce e mai trist e c\u0103, at\u00e2ta timp c\u00e2t aceast\u0103 educa\u0163ie va persista, Nicoletele vor continua s\u0103 moar\u0103. T\u0103cute, sp\u0103site, d\u00e2nd statusuri mult prea subtile pe Facebook, \u00een care cer ajutor, dar nu prea explicit, s\u0103 nu cumva s\u0103 se prind\u0103 gunoiul uman \u015fi s\u0103 sar\u0103 iar la b\u0103taie.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
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