{"id":15222,"date":"2018-07-03T10:27:20","date_gmt":"2018-07-03T07:27:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=15222"},"modified":"2018-07-03T10:27:20","modified_gmt":"2018-07-03T07:27:20","slug":"ieri-iordache-co-si-au-votat-intangibilitatea","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/ieri-iordache-co-si-au-votat-intangibilitatea\/","title":{"rendered":"Ieri, Iordache & co \u015fi-au votat intangibilitatea"},"content":{"rendered":"

Uneori, m\u0103 trezesc c\u0103 am darul profe\u0163iei. Un astfel de moment vizionar am avut ieri, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 \u015ftiu, \u00een ce am scris la mi\u015fto acest fictiv dialog pesedist de pe marginea legii care viza combaterea violen\u0163ei domestice<\/a>.<\/strong> Pute\u0163i merge p\u00e2n\u0103 acolo, sau, mai simplu, v\u0103 d\u0103 fata citatul.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u015ei chiar nu ciordim nimic cu legea asta?\u201d
\n\u201cNu, boss.\u201d
\n\u201cNu ne iese nimic.\u201d
\n\u201cNu, boss.\u201d
\n\u201cChiar e prima lege care e strict pentru votant \u015fi at\u00e2t?\u201d
\n\u201cDa, boss.\u201d
\n\u201cNasol. M\u00e2ine dezincrimin\u0103m zece noi infrac\u0163iuni, s\u0103 recuper\u0103m.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Ei, bine, eu, c\u00e2nd o scrisesem, eram convins\u0103 c\u0103 e o glum\u0103. Una proast\u0103 chiar. Dar se pare c\u0103 dimpotriv\u0103, era gluma proast\u0103 numit\u0103 \u00eendeob\u015fte adev\u0103r. <\/p>\n

Practic, tot codul penal a fost f\u0103cut harcea-parcea, \u00een a\u015fa fel \u00eenc\u00e2t slujba\u015ful public s\u0103 fie orice altceva dec\u00e2t acest salariat al poporului, destinat s\u0103 serveasc\u0103 interesele acestuia, \u015fi maai degrab\u0103 un tiran atotputernic, cu zero responsabilitate legat\u0103 de deciziile sale. E stadiul de “dup\u0103 mine, potopul”, al politicii rom\u00e2ne\u015fti. <\/p>\n

Ce au f\u0103cut cu abuzul \u00een serviciu e demn de propriul banc: <\/p>\n

-Jeane, recuno\u015fti c\u0103 ai furat portofelul de la Mitic\u0103?
\n-P\u0103i nu eu fur, dom’ judec\u0103tor. Dumneavoastr\u0103 ave\u0163i o defini\u0163ie gre\u015fit\u0103. Ia s\u0103 zicem c\u0103 furatul e numai de la oameni cu ochi alba\u015ftri, \u015fi se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 numai mar\u0163ea pe la 4, \u015fi numai dac\u0103 banii din portofel sunt mai mul\u0163i de o mie de euro, \u015fi exist\u0103 \u015fi m\u0103run\u0163i\u015f de metal. Ce culoare au ochii lui Mitic\u0103?
\n-C\u0103prui.
\n-Ce zi e azi?
\n-Vineri.
\n-Ce or\u0103?
\n-Zece diminea\u0163a.
\n-C\u00e2t aveai \u00een portofel, Mitic\u0103?
\n-Patru sute de euro.
\n-\u015ei nici n-aveai m\u0103run\u0163i\u015f. Deci, dom’ judec\u0103tor, se dovede\u015fte c\u0103 n-am furat nimic. <\/p>\n

\u015ei chiar \u015fi defini\u0163ia asta super abramburit\u0103, care transform\u0103 instant \u00een om cinstit 90% din popula\u0163ie, se aplic\u0103 doar \u00een acte care nu provin de la Parlament \u015fi Guvern. Parlamentul \u015fi Guvernul sunt deasupra responsabilit\u0103\u0163ii legale. \u00cen cazul lor se aplic\u0103, pe baza bancului de mai sus.
\n-Eu n-am furat, eu mi-am completat necesarul. <\/p>\n

\u015ei desigur, s-au restr\u00e2ns termenele de prescrip\u0163ie pentru infrac\u0163iuni. Sau, pe baza bancului de mai sus.<\/p>\n

-Nu mi-am plimbat m\u00e2na pe la buzunarele lui Mitic\u0103 alalt\u0103ieri. Am f\u0103cut-o cu o zi \u00eenainte, prin urmare, nu s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat nimic. <\/p>\n

Faza cu continuitatea la grupul infrac\u0163ional organizat m-a f\u0103cut s\u0103 r\u00e2d \u00een chinuri. E ceva de genul: <\/p>\n

-Jeane, tu cu ga\u015fca ta viola\u0163i babele din sat \u00een fiecare mar\u0163i \u015fi joi.
\n-\u0102, nu chiar. C\u0103 s\u00e2mb\u0103t\u0103 Mitic\u0103 avea curs de tenis. N-aveam continuitate. <\/p>\n

Toate modific\u0103rile din codul penal sunt tentative de legitimare a tuturor f\u0103r\u0103delegilor universului, prin relativizarea termenului. \u015ei adev\u0103ratul criminal e\u015fti tu, pentru c\u0103 insinuezi c\u0103 ei ar fi criminali. Mai nou, po\u0163i face \u00eenchisoare de la \u015fase luni la trei ani dac\u0103 te referi la un suspect ca la un condamnat. <\/p>\n

-B\u0103i, ho\u0163ule.
\n-Cum s\u0103 afirmi una ca asta?
\n-P\u0103i te-am v\u0103zut cu m\u00e2na \u00een buzunarul lui Mitic\u0103, pescuind portofelul.
\n-Dar m-a condamnat cineva?
\n-B\u0103i, am zis c\u0103 te-am v\u0103…
\n-OK, tu e\u015fti infractor c\u0103 zici asta. <\/p>\n

Mai r\u0103m\u00e2ne s\u0103 defineasc\u0103 \u015fi prezum\u0163ia de nevinov\u0103\u0163ie, precum urmeaz\u0103: <\/p>\n

Prezum\u0163ia de nevinov\u0103\u0163ie este starea perpetu\u0103 a membrului marcant PSD, indiferent de modurile \u00een care \u00ee\u015fi completeaz\u0103 necesarul sau ajut\u0103 contra cost pe al\u0163ii s\u0103 \u015fi-l completeze. Cine formuleaz\u0103 cea mai vag\u0103 \u00eendoial\u0103 la adresa numitei prezum\u0163ii de perpetu\u0103 nevinov\u0103\u0163ie va pl\u0103ti amend\u0103, fir-ar tac-su al dracu’, p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00eenva\u0163\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi \u0163in\u0103 \u00eendoielile pentru el. <\/p>\n

Acum v\u0103 l\u0103s\u0103m, c\u0103 avem ni\u015fte necesar de completat. <\/p>\n

Foto: Elisa Riva \/ Pixabay.com. <\/p>\n

\u00a0***<\/div>\n

\u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Uneori, m\u0103 trezesc c\u0103 am darul profe\u0163iei. Un astfel de moment vizionar am avut ieri, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 \u015ftiu, \u00een ce am scris la mi\u015fto...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15225,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15222","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/thieves.jpg?fit=640%2C640&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15222","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15222"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15222\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15227,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15222\/revisions\/15227"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15225"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15222"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15222"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15222"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}