{"id":15577,"date":"2018-09-16T11:53:58","date_gmt":"2018-09-16T08:53:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=15577"},"modified":"2018-09-16T12:08:04","modified_gmt":"2018-09-16T09:08:04","slug":"baietii-pe-care-nu-i-vrea-nimeni","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/baietii-pe-care-nu-i-vrea-nimeni\/","title":{"rendered":"B\u0103ie\u0163ii pe care nu-i vrea nimeni"},"content":{"rendered":"

S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na asta m-am tot revoltat \u00eempotriva ploii de mesaje private, \u015fi am avut parte de o serie de reac\u0163ii cretine – pe care le voi dezvolta \u00een alt articol – \u015fi de c\u00e2teva m\u0103rturisiri care m-au \u00eentristat. Sunt mul\u0163i tipi care nu fac sex cu lunile, ba chiar cu anii, pentru c\u0103, din diverse motive, nu reu\u015fesc s\u0103 st\u00e2rneasc\u0103 acest tip de interes din partea doamnelor \u015fi domni\u015foarelor.<\/p>\n

\u015ei atunci, zilele lor sunt o pendulare \u00eentre “toate femeile sunt curve” – “jos feminismul” – “de m\u00e2ine \u00eemi tai p*la” – “muie, curvelor” – “de ceeee nu m\u0103 iube\u015fte nimeni, bruhuhu?”.<\/p>\n

Problema cu aceast\u0103 mentalitate este c\u0103 ea duce spre ceea ce eu numesc “cercul vicios al nef*terii” – sunt respins – m\u0103 port ca un bou s\u0103 m\u0103 r\u0103zbun – sunt respins iar – m\u0103 port \u015fi mai bovin – sunt respins once again – iau premiul Boul de Aur, sec\u0163iunea crea\u0163ie, \u015fi tot a\u015fa, p\u00e2n\u0103 ajung un ratat b\u0103tr\u00e2n \u015fi vicios \u00een bodeg\u0103 la Argentin, ocupat s\u0103 povesteasc\u0103 basme erotice conspectate cu grij\u0103 din serialul porno “G\u00e2t Ad\u00e2nc”.<\/p>\n

Ca s\u0103 scapi din cercul vicios al nef*terii, primul pas e s\u0103 iei suta aia de lei \u015fi s\u0103 vizitezi o doamn\u0103 practicant\u0103 a celei mai vechi meserii a lume. Ba chiar mai multe. \u00cen aceast\u0103 faz\u0103, pe seduc\u0163ie nu te po\u0163i baza, c\u0103 de cum vezi o femeie, faci ca o maimu\u0163\u0103 spasmodic\u0103. \u015ei NU e sexy. E repulsiv maxim.<\/p>\n

Completeaz\u0103-\u0163i caren\u0163ele de natur\u0103 erotic\u0103, p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00een punctul \u00een care te detensionezi \u015fi \u00ee\u0163i dispare aerul de disperare \u015fi izul antisex. Momentul \u00een care te calmezi \u015fi vezi \u00een femeie un simplu om, nu du\u015fmanul de clas\u0103 care trebuie \u00eenfr\u00e2nt, e chiar momentul \u00een care vei \u00eencepe s\u0103 fu*i \u015fi tu ceva.<\/p>\n

Al doilea pas e exact o chestie pe care \u0163i-o interzic to\u0163i incelii care dau manuale de ag\u0103\u0163at: \u00eemprietene\u015fte-te cu femei. F\u0103r\u0103 inten\u0163ii ascunse. Pur \u015fi simplu, fii prieten normal cu femei. Impune tu un friendzone, dar care s\u0103 fie chiar friendzone: amici\u0163ie fireasc\u0103, ie\u015fit la b\u0103ute etc.
\nA\u015fa apuci s\u0103 cuno\u015fti diverse fete, s\u0103 \u00een\u0163elegi cum g\u00e2ndesc \u015fi ce vor, \u015fi, de la un punct \u00eencolo, una sau dou\u0103 o s\u0103 \u00eenceap\u0103 invariabil s\u0103 te plac\u0103, iar lucrurile se vor dezvolta natural de la sine.
\nAscult\u0103 la sora ta Lorena: indiferent ce bra\u015foave \u00ee\u0163i v\u00e2nd alt-righ\u0163ii pe net, masculul care lurkere\u015fte singur pe strad\u0103 sau \u0103la care bag\u0103 obscenit\u0103\u0163i \u00een mesaj privat la o secund\u0103 dup\u0103 accept sunt SC\u00c2RBO\u015eI. De aceea, ra\u0163ia de r\u0103spuns pozitiv e de 0,00001%. Omul care e \u00eenconjurat de multe fete, \u015fi toate amice, transmite siguran\u0163\u0103 \u015fi \u00eencredere.
\nPentru urechea feminin\u0103, pove\u015fti de genul: “M\u0103, ce b\u0103iat mi\u015fto e Gigel, eram eu beat\u0103, m-a dus acas\u0103 \u015fi NU MI-A F\u0102CUT NIMIC” e afrodisiac \u00een stare pur\u0103, pentru c\u0103 orice femeie de atractivitate cel pu\u0163in medie a fost h\u0103ituit\u0103 din adolescen\u0163\u0103 de to\u0163i labagiii fune\u015fti, \u015fi \u00eenjurat\u0103 de al\u0163i labagii fune\u015fti, din invidie c\u0103 are aten\u0163ia primilor labagii fune\u015fti.
\nExact de aceea, femeile se \u00eendr\u0103gostesc de OMUL CARE NU CAUT\u0102 S\u0102.<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103-\u0163i faci ga\u015fc\u0103 de fete, ele o s\u0103 te ajute, automat, s\u0103 te \u00eembraci mai bine, s\u0103 te aranjezi mai bine, o s\u0103 alerge \u015fi o s\u0103 mearg\u0103 la sal\u0103 cu tine, iar asta o s\u0103 te transforme \u00eentr-un b\u0103rbat cu cam 30% mai atr\u0103g\u0103tor pentru alte fete, care vor vrea \u015fi ele \u00een ga\u015fca ta.<\/p>\n

\u00cen al treilea r\u00e2nd: fii omul cu ini\u0163iative interesante.<\/p>\n

F\u0103 excursii. C\u0103l\u0103tore\u015fte. Du-te la spectacole de diverse tipuri. Educ\u0103-te. Mai f\u0103 un curs de ceva. Vezi un stand-up pe Netflix. Mai educ\u0103-te un pic. Salveaz\u0103 c\u0103\u0163ei \u015fi pisoi.
\nToate astea \u00ee\u0163i vor face via\u0163a palpitant\u0103, pe de o parte, \u015fi vor face \u015fi grupul de prietene despre care vorbesc s\u0103 te admire \u015fi s\u0103 te considere omul cool \u015fi cu orizonturi vaste. \u015ei implicit o s\u0103 ai lucruri minunate de povestit. O s\u0103 transmi\u0163i energie pozitiv\u0103 \u015fi spirit de aventur\u0103, pentru c\u0103 \u00een acest punct, nu vei mai sim\u0163i c\u0103 to\u0163i se distreaz\u0103, numai tu nu, ci c\u0103 tu e\u015fti miezul distrac\u0163iei.<\/p>\n

\u00cen al patrulea r\u00e2nd: ie\u015fi \u00een ora\u015f cu mindsetul c\u0103, indiferent dac\u0103 pic\u0103 ceva sau nu, scopul t\u0103u e s\u0103 te distrezi.<\/p>\n

C\u00e2nd ai o singur\u0103 \u0163int\u0103, \u015fi anume v\u00e2n\u0103toarea de p\u0103s\u0103rici, pierzi vibe-ul general al momentului. \u015ei te \u015fi v\u0103duve\u015fti pe tine \u00eensu\u0163i de \u015fansa de a te amuza, de a tr\u0103i petrecerea, de a dansa caraghios \u015fi a\u015fa mai departe.
\nNu face asta. Simte-te bine, pur \u015fi simplu.
\n\u015ei starea de bine pe care o ai se va transmite c\u0103tre al\u0163ii \u015fi altele, iar c\u00e2nd chemi o fat\u0103 la dans dup\u0103 zece minute de prosteal\u0103 amuzant\u0103, e cu totul altfel dec\u00e2t dac\u0103 o chemi la dans dup\u0103 o sear\u0103 de tentative de ag\u0103\u0163at e\u015fuate, care te-au umplut \u015fi pe tine de draci.<\/p>\n

Morala pove\u015ftii: Secretul spre inimile (\u015fi alte zone anatomice) ale femeilor nu e \u00een a insista c\u0103 vrei. Toate \u015ftiu c\u0103 vrei. \u015ei jur c\u0103 nu \u00eencepe s\u0103 le pese dec\u00e2t dac\u0103 le dai un motiv s\u0103 le pese. F\u0103-le s\u0103 te doreasc\u0103 ele pe tine.
\nIar asta presupune timp \u015fi r\u0103bdare.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

\u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

***
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na asta m-am tot revoltat \u00eempotriva ploii de mesaje private, \u015fi am avut parte de o serie de reac\u0163ii cretine – pe care le...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15007,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15577","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/beauty.jpg?fit=400%2C400&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15577","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15577"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15577\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15582,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15577\/revisions\/15582"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15007"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15577"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15577"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15577"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}