Ca orice fra\u0163i care se respect\u0103, eu \u015fi brotherul meu nu avem absolut nimic \u00een comun. Eu am fost dintotdeauna o f\u0103ptur\u0103 ginga\u015f\u0103, cu ochii-n soleil, el a fost din fa\u015f\u0103 un bi\u015fni\u0163man de mare implicare, priceput \u00een a scoate bani \u015fi din piatr\u0103 seac\u0103. Numai c\u0103, \u00eentr-o zi cu soare, \u00een care ploua cu g\u0103leata, al meu fratelo a vrut s\u0103 afle cum se poate \u00eenv\u0103\u0163a actoria.
\nDin pur\u0103 plictiseal\u0103, logic. Ne prinsese ploaia prin ora\u015f – da’ ploaie de-aia toren\u0163ial\u0103, de var\u0103, care transform\u0103 instant str\u0103zile \u00een p\u00e2raie – \u015fi ne retr\u0103sesem sub o strea\u015fin\u0103. \u015ei neav\u00e2nd despre ce s\u0103 vorbim, frati-miu \u015fi-a amintit c\u0103 eram \u00een anul II de actorie. \u015ei i se p\u0103rea – logic – c\u0103 nu are cum s\u0103 \u00eel \u00eenve\u0163e cineva pe Al Pacino s\u0103 presteze ca \u00een “Parfum de femeie”. Ceea ce adev\u0103rat. Ceea ce se poate, \u00een schimb, e s\u0103 cape\u0163i un bagaj de unelte, care s\u0103 cizeleze marile presta\u0163ii de mai t\u00e2rziu.
\n-De exemplu, alege rapid o poezie!
\n-Haide, b\u0103, de unde s\u0103 \u015ftiu eu poezii! \u00ce\u0163i ba\u0163i joc de mine!?
\n-Orice fel de poezie, nu conteaz\u0103.
\n\u015ei frati-miu \u015fi-a amintit ultima prostioar\u0103 obscen\u0103 care circula pe messengere \u00een vremea aceea. Suna a\u015fa:<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n “O pas\u0103re pe gard st\u0103tea \u00cen lumea asta prost f\u0103cut\u0103 <\/em><\/p>\n -Excelent\u0103, zic eu. Acum, imagineaz\u0103-\u0163i c\u0103 eu sunt publicul, \u015fi spune-mi-o! \u015ei tot a\u015fa, p\u00e2n\u0103 a trecut ploaia. \u00cen final, frati-miu ajunsese s\u0103 spun\u0103 dumnezeie\u015fte poezioara obscen\u0103 de pe messenger. Ca orice fra\u0163i care se respect\u0103, eu \u015fi brotherul meu nu avem absolut nimic \u00een comun. Eu am fost dintotdeauna o f\u0103ptur\u0103 ginga\u015f\u0103, cu...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1623","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1623","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1623"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1623\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1623"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1623"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1623"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n\u015ei medita: Ce pula mea! Ce pula mea!?
\nCe-i pas\u0103 lumii dimprejur
\nDe fut o pizd\u0103 sau un cur?
\nCe-i pula lor? E pula mea!
\nCe pula mea! Ce pula mea!<\/p>\n
\nC\u0103ca\u0163ii fut \u00een loc s\u0103 put\u0103
\nIar futangiii consacra\u0163i
\nNu pot s\u0103 fut\u0103 de c\u0103ca\u0163i.
\nCe pula mea, ce pula mea!” <\/p><\/blockquote>\n
\n-O pas\u0103re pe gard st\u0103tea \/ \u015ei medita…
\n-Nu mi-o recita cu ritm \u015fi rim\u0103, poveste\u015fte-o! Spune-mi-o ca pe o poveste.
\n-A, ok. O pas\u0103re pe gard st\u0103tea \u015fi medita ce pu…
\n-NU! Povestea a fost ok. Dar nu uita c\u0103 alea-s g\u00e2ndurile p\u0103s\u0103rii. Transpune-te \u00een starea ei de spirit!
\n-O pas\u0103re pe gard st\u0103tea \u015fi medita: CE PULA MEAA!!!
\n-Tz-tz, ce golani! f\u0103cu o bab\u0103, care trecea pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 noi cu o umbrel\u0103 paradit\u0103.
\n-Dac\u0103 urci din prima la apogeu, nu mai ai unde s\u0103 urci dup\u0103 aceea. C\u00e2nd stai \u015fi fierbi \u00een tine, nu te \u00eenfurii chiar at\u00e2t de tare. E mai mult\u0103 am\u0103r\u0103ciune!
\n-O pas\u0103re pe gard st\u0103tea \u015fi medita:
\n\u015ei aici, frati-miu adopt\u0103 o atitudine involuntar\u0103 de Hamlet a-fi-sau-a-nu-fi.
\n-Ce pula mea… Ce pula mea…
\n-AHAHAHAHAHA! Bravo! Mi\u015fto trecere. Dar vezi tu… nu po\u0163i spune cele dou\u0103 “ce pula mea” cu aceea\u015fi intensitate. Las\u0103-l pe primul a\u015fa, hamletian, dar la al doilea, te g\u00e2nde\u015fti la problem\u0103 \u015fi e\u015fti mai ofticat. Dar nu ofticat-isteric, ci cu o oftic\u0103 din aia subtil\u0103, care te roade la ficat.
\n-Ce pula mea… Ce pula mea!
\n-Buuuuun. Excelent!<\/p>\n
\n-B\u0103, tu \u015ftii c\u0103 ai putea da la actorie cu asta?
\n-\u015ei a\u015f intra? face frati-miu \u00eenc\u00e2ntat.
\n-Asta nu \u015ftiu. Dar sigur ai face ni\u015fte babe gre\u0163oase de pe acolo s\u0103 moar\u0103 de inim\u0103. Ceea ce ar fi excelent!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"