{"id":16261,"date":"2018-12-18T11:45:04","date_gmt":"2018-12-18T08:45:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=16261"},"modified":"2018-12-18T11:45:04","modified_gmt":"2018-12-18T08:45:04","slug":"la-posta","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/la-posta\/","title":{"rendered":"La po\u0219t\u0103"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ieri, m\u0103 duc la un oficiu po\u0219tal din Bucure\u0219ti. Un singur ghi\u0219eu deschis, coad\u0103 de b\u0103tr\u00e2nei veni\u021bi dup\u0103 pensii. Pa\u0219nici, \u00eemp\u0103ca\u021bi cu soarta, dup\u0103 o via\u021b\u0103 de stat la cozi. \u00centreb:<\/p>\n

-Nu v\u0103 sup\u0103ra\u021bi \u0219i ierta\u021bi nesim\u021birea, se poate deschide un al doilea ghi\u0219eu, s\u0103 nu ne uite Dumnezeu aici?<\/p>\n

-Nu! se zbor\u0219e\u0219te o tanti care completa de zor catastife. Zici c\u0103 o \u00eentrebasem dac\u0103 accept\u0103 s\u0103 fac\u0103 amor \u0219i pe bonuri de mas\u0103.<\/p>\n

Ok. Aveam de ridicat un colet. Unii \u00eenc\u0103 n-au aflat de existen\u021ba curierului, \u00een 2019.<\/p>\n

Bine, acum m\u0103n\u00e2nc cacao cu lapte; \u00eencurajez s\u0103 mi se trimit\u0103 stuff la po\u0219t\u0103, pentru c\u0103 de c\u00e2te ori are un curier s\u0103-mi aduc\u0103 ceva, de obicei eu sunt la dracu \u00een praznic, \u00een col\u021bul opus al ora\u0219ului, \u0219i dac\u0103 sun firma de curierat \u0219i stabilim o or\u0103 a doua zi, nici de-al naibii livrarea nu vine la ora aia. Cum mi-a explicat un curier o dat\u0103: Eu fac ora\u0219ul roat\u0103, drag\u0103, nu-s dus – \u00eentors, c\u0103 nu-s bilet de avion.<\/p>\n

Dar divaghez. Deci, eram eu la oficiul po\u0219tal \u0219i a\u0219teptam ca proasta la coad\u0103, num\u0103r\u00e2ndu-mi punctele mici \u0219i ro\u0219ii care ar fi fost peri\u0219ori, dac\u0103 eu eram feminizd\u0103 de social media.<\/p>\n

C\u00e2nd, deodat\u0103, tanti care urmeaz\u0103 la r\u00e2nd zice:<\/p>\n

-A\u0219 vrea s\u0103 trimit un colet la adre…<\/p>\n

-N-avem formular de colet.<\/p>\n

-Cum adic\u0103 n-ave\u021bi formular de colet? Pe 17 decembrie?<\/p>\n

-Ni s-au terminat.<\/p>\n

-P\u0103i, dar eu vreau s\u0103 trimit colet!<\/p>\n

\u0218i se isterizeaz\u0103 tipul de la ghi\u0219eu.<\/p>\n

-N-a\u021bi \u00een\u021beles c\u0103 nu putem?? Doar v-am spus! se zbor\u0219e\u0219te el.<\/p>\n

Zici c\u0103 eram eu, u\u0219uind un Mr. Laba-laba \u00een mesaje private.<\/p>\n

-Cum s\u0103 nu pute\u021bi, nu sunte\u021bi po\u0219t\u0103?<\/p>\n

-N-avem formular, v-am zis foarte clar!<\/p>\n

-\u0218i ceva, nu \u0219tiu, pe calculator nu se poate? insist\u0103 femeia.<\/p>\n

-Nu, doamn\u0103. Nu avem \u0219i nu avem. Merge\u021bi la oficiul po\u0219tal x!<\/p>\n

-Sigur, acum m\u0103 pune\u021bi \u0219i s\u0103 m\u0103 plimb.<\/p>\n

-Lua\u021bi autobuzul, dou\u0103 sta\u021bii. Urm\u0103torul.<\/p>\n

-Dar, domnule, nu ave\u021bi cum s\u0103 nu m\u0103 servi\u021bi. Vreau s\u0103 vorbesc cu diriginta.<\/p>\n

\u0218i doamna cu catastife, pe un ton mai pu\u021bin \u021b\u00e2fnos:<\/p>\n

-Eu sunt. Doamn\u0103, ni s-a terminat formularele. Veni\u021bi m\u00e2ine \u0219i cerem. Rezolv\u0103m. Acum nu avem cum s\u0103 ne d\u0103m peste cap s\u0103 ne facem formular pentru dumneavoastr\u0103.<\/p>\n

-Sigur nu m\u0103 plimb degeaba \u0219i m\u00e2ine.<\/p>\n

-Sigur. M\u00e2ine o s\u0103 fie.<\/p>\n

Se deschide u\u0219a \u0219i intr\u0103 o alt\u0103 doamn\u0103, cu o cutie imens\u0103 \u00een bra\u021be.<\/p>\n

-A\u021bi venit degeaba, n-au formulare, doamn\u0103.<\/p>\n

-Ba eu am adus formular, z\u00e2mbe\u0219te noua venit\u0103.<\/p>\n

Acum, am o \u00eentrebare pentru onora\u021bii cititori: de unde fac rost de un certificat de deces \u00een alb, \u00een caz c\u0103 mor m\u00e2ine \u0219i n-au \u0103ia formular? S\u0103 nu se dea \u0103ia peste cap s\u0103 se fac\u0103 certificate de deces pentru mine.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

\u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

***
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ieri, m\u0103 duc la un oficiu po\u0219tal din Bucure\u0219ti. Un singur ghi\u0219eu deschis, coad\u0103 de b\u0103tr\u00e2nei veni\u021bi dup\u0103 pensii. Pa\u0219nici, \u00eemp\u0103ca\u021bi cu soarta, dup\u0103...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15902,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16261","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/postaredactiei.jpg?fit=480%2C360&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16261","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16261"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16261\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16262,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16261\/revisions\/16262"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15902"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16261"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16261"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16261"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}