{"id":16304,"date":"2018-12-24T11:59:18","date_gmt":"2018-12-24T08:59:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=16304"},"modified":"2020-07-16T19:56:43","modified_gmt":"2020-07-16T16:56:43","slug":"da-fratica-preferam-cafeaua-dimineata","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/da-fratica-preferam-cafeaua-dimineata\/","title":{"rendered":"Da, fr\u0103\u021bic\u0103, prefer\u0103m cafeaua diminea\u021ba"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Azi, avem o form\u0103 un pic neobi\u0219nuit\u0103 de po\u0219ta redac\u021biei, pentru c\u0103 nu mi-a scris nimeni \u00een aceast\u0103 s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103. \u00cen schimb, mi-a comentat un tip care \u00ee\u0219i deducea toate informa\u021biile despre femei de pe siteuri de porneturi \u0219i de ag\u0103\u021bat, s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eentrebe de ce mint femeile \u0219i de ce nu recunosc ce mult le place sexul. \u0218i a ata\u0219at un link. <\/p>\n<p>Unde ducea linkul?<\/p>\n<p>La chestia asta:<\/p>\n<div class=\"video-container\"><span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"700\" height=\"394\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/KSN7LAfy6N8?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span><\/div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Pe scurt, animala asta absolut dizgra\u021bioas\u0103, care are talent de intervievator cam c\u00e2t am eu \u0219anse s\u0103 c\u00e2\u0219tig viitoarea olimpiad\u0103 de iarn\u0103, sec\u021biunea patinaj artistic, categoria cupluri, se folose\u0219te de \u00eentrebare s\u0103 se \u00eenghesuie agasant \u0219i inconfortabil \u00een ni\u0219te fete, s\u0103 bage insinu\u0103ri de cel mai prost gust cu altele \u0219i dea \u00een repeat reac\u021biile jenate ale altora. O \u00eentrebare de via\u021b\u0103 privat\u0103 pe care, b\u0103d\u0103ran fiind, o pune cu elegan\u021ba \u0219i pertinen\u021ba unui elefant \u00een magazinul de por\u021belanuri.<\/p>\n<p>\u0218i mai are \u0219i tupeul s\u0103 intituleze asta &#8220;pamflet&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>Pamfletul, fr\u0103\u0163ic\u0103, presupune INTELIGEN\u0162\u0102 \u015eI UMOR. Aspectele alea care-\u0163i lipsesc \u0163ie din n\u0103scare.<\/p>\n<p>Mbun.<\/p>\n<p>Ce \u00een\u0163elege comentacul care-mi pune \u00eentrebarea?<\/p>\n<p>C\u0103 vezi doamne, intervievatele ar min\u0163i.<\/p>\n<p>Fapt insinuat \u015fi de nasul \u0103la de Pinocchio, pe la jum\u0103tatea filmule\u0163ului.<\/p>\n<p>Iar insinuarea c\u0103 tipele ar min\u0163i \u015fi c\u0103 &#8220;m\u0103car eu ar trebui s\u0103 fiu sincer\u0103&#8221; mi se pare chiar mai jenant\u0103 dec\u00e2t &#8220;interviul&#8221; \u00een sine,<\/p>\n<p>OK. S\u0103 fiu sincer\u0103. Sincer, \u0103\u015ftia care suspecta\u0163i c\u0103 fetele mint sunte\u0163i idio\u0163i de beh\u0103i\u0163i.<\/p>\n<p><strong>A<\/strong>:\u00a0<strong>Femeile nu au morning wood\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Starea obi\u015fnuit\u0103 de trezire a TUTUROR tipelor cu care am locuit prin c\u0103mine, am \u00eenchiriat apartamente, am \u00eemp\u0103r\u0163it camere de hotel e u\u0103\u0103\u0103, deja e diminea\u0163\u0103. Parc\u0103 a trecut tractorul peste mine.<\/p>\n<p>Femeile se trezesc foarte low energy \u015fi relativ ciufute. Pentru c\u0103 ele au un somn mult mai agitat, pentru c\u0103 un vis mai nasol le stric\u0103 toat\u0103 odihna, pentru c\u0103 n-au dormit suficient \u015fi a\u015fa mai departe.<\/p>\n<p>Avem nevoie de ni\u015fte timp \u015fi de un c\u0103noi uria\u015f de cafea s\u0103 ne clarific\u0103m imaginea \u015fi s\u0103 \u00eencepem s\u0103 func\u0163ion\u0103m omene\u015fte.<\/p>\n<p>Apoi, de obicei, diminea\u0163a femeia planific\u0103 mintal ce are de f\u0103cut \u00een ziua respectiv\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>Nu i-ar trebui sex nici dac\u0103 ar descinde Brad Pitt cel de la 30 de ani la ea \u00een buc\u0103t\u0103rie. Ar zice: &#8220;Voinicule, ia calul meu \u015fi du-te&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p><strong>B) Femeile au nevoie de relaxare \u015fi de atmosfer\u0103 pentru sex\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Genul \u0103sta de \u00eentrebare, \u015fi reac\u0163iile de \u0103h\u0103h\u0103, nu sunte\u0163i sincere, \u00ee\u0163i tr\u0103deaz\u0103 instant labagiul profesionist care n-a \u00eemp\u0103r\u0163it \u00een via\u0163a lui casa \u015fi patul cu o femeie \u00een carne \u015fi oase. Un b\u0103rbat care a fost \u00een minimum O rela\u0163ie de lung\u0103 durat\u0103 \u015ftie c\u0103 treaba func\u0163ioneaz\u0103 mai degrab\u0103 a\u015fa:<\/p>\n<div class=\"video-container\"><span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"700\" height=\"394\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/aX8jRDHLM6U?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span><\/div>\n<p>Sigur, pentru lucr\u0103toarele sexuale e simplu. E job. Mimezi orgasmul cum vrea pl\u0103titorul \u015fi s\u0103n\u0103tate. Dar o tip\u0103 normal\u0103, care nu face sex ca parte a unei tranzac\u0163ii, ci ca s\u0103-i plac\u0103 \u015fi ei, are nevoie de atmosfer\u0103, muzic\u0103, m\u00e2ng\u00e2ieri, \u015foapte, preludiu, s\u0103 \u00eei vin\u0103 pofta.<\/p>\n<p>C\u00e2nd e\u015fti femeie, datul din fund de trei ori urmat de ejaculare nu ofer\u0103 nici o pl\u0103cere. E doar lab\u0103 asistat\u0103.<\/p>\n<p><strong>C) C\u00e2nd nu ai chef, CHIAR nu ai chef<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u00cenc\u0103 nu am cunoscut b\u0103rbat care s\u0103 nu aib\u0103 chef de sex. Oric\u00e2t de obosit, stresat sau am\u0103r\u00e2t s\u0103 fi fost. Pentru ei, sexul e o strict\u0103 eliberare de lichid spermatic \u015fi de endorfine, \u015fi nu exist\u0103 povar\u0103 &#8211; except\u00e2nd anumite boli &#8211; care s\u0103 te \u00eempiedice.<\/p>\n<p>Pentru femei, e mai complicat. \u0162ine de perioada din lun\u0103 \u00een care te afli. \u015ei nu m\u0103 refer doar la menstrua\u0163ie, ci \u015fi la perioade tranzitorii c\u00e2nd pur \u015fi simplu NU \u00ee\u0163i arde. \u0162ine de starea emo\u0163ional\u0103: dac\u0103 se simt iubite, dac\u0103 simt c\u0103 \u0103luia \u00eei pas\u0103 real de ele, dac\u0103 facturile sunt pl\u0103tite, dac\u0103 au note ok la facultate, dac\u0103 merge treaba la munc\u0103, dac\u0103 n-au \u00eent\u00e2lnit vreun intervievator bou pe strad\u0103, s\u0103 le \u00eentrebe t\u00e2mpenii. \u00cen cazul nostru, cheful de sex se na\u015fte mult mai greu \u015fi trebuie \u00eendeplinite mai multe condi\u0163ii.<\/p>\n<p>Nu e: m\u0103 trezesc diminea\u0163a \u015fi sar direct \u00een p***. O fi a\u015fa \u00een filmul t\u0103u preferat de pe Red Tube, dar \u0103la e jucat de o profesionist\u0103 pl\u0103tit\u0103 s\u0103 \u00eentruchipeze o fantezie. Are aceea\u015fi leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu via\u0163a real\u0103, c\u00e2t\u0103 are Fast &amp; Furious cu traficul rutier din zona Unirii \u00eentr-o miercuri la \u015fapte.<\/p>\n<p><strong>D) Ca femeie, descoperi pl\u0103cerea de a face sex abia dup\u0103 25 de ani.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Sigur, nu m\u0103 refer la tinerele \u00eempinse de mici \u00een conjuncturi promiscue. Zic de fetele normale, din familii ok. Alea silite s\u0103 se prostitueze de pe la 14 ani nu \u00eenva\u0163\u0103 s\u0103 se bucure de actul sexual niciodat\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cen primii ani, \u00eenc\u0103 nu \u00ee\u0163i controlezi corpul, \u00eenc\u0103 lucrurile sunt mult prea str\u00e2mte \u015fi mult prea str\u0103ine, nu \u015ftii nici tu ce te stimuleaz\u0103 \u015fi ce te excit\u0103, \u015fi faci pe femeia fatal\u0103 s\u0103 impresionezi pe al\u0163ii. Nu \u0163ine de erotism, ci de nevoia de popularitate \u00een liceu \u015fi de nevoia de a fi iubit\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>Abia pe la 25, \u00eenve\u0163i s\u0103 te relaxezi, \u00eenve\u0163i s\u0103 descoperi punctele erogene, \u015fi \u00eenve\u0163i s\u0103-\u0163i controlezi \u015fi s\u0103-\u0163i induci orgasmul. \u015ei abia dup\u0103 25 putem spune c\u0103 e\u015fti o femeie st\u0103p\u00e2n\u0103 pe corpul ei, care face sex de pl\u0103cere, \u015fi nu ca moned\u0103 de schimb pentru acceptare sau iluzia iubirii.<\/p>\n<p>Or, majoritatea tipelor pe care le intervieva \u0103sta erau mult sub 25 de ani. Pentru categoria asta de v\u00e2rst\u0103, sexul e munc\u0103 grea. Sigur, facem, c\u0103 vreau s\u0103 m\u0103 iubeasc\u0103 Gigel, dar mai pe sear\u0103. Sau m\u00e2ine.<\/p>\n<p><strong>E) \u015ei nu te ajut\u0103 cu nimic aluziile porcoase, intruziunile, obr\u0103zniciile \u015fi h\u0103r\u0163uirea nesolicitat\u0103.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Moartea pasiunii.<\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>\u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/paypal.me\/Trollywood\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-14577\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=768%2C768&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=160%2C160&amp;ssl=1 160w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=320%2C320&amp;ssl=1 320w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=184%2C184&amp;ssl=1 184w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=600%2C600&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=100%2C100&amp;ssl=1 100w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?w=931&amp;ssl=1 931w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>***<br \/>\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lorenaalmighty\/\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/lorenalupu\">Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/lorena.lup\/\">Instagram<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Azi, avem o form\u0103 un pic neobi\u0219nuit\u0103 de po\u0219ta redac\u021biei, pentru c\u0103 nu mi-a scris nimeni \u00een aceast\u0103 s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103. \u00cen schimb, mi-a comentat un&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":13487,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16304","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/10\/cafea.jpg?fit=510%2C340&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16304","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16304"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16304\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20063,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16304\/revisions\/20063"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13487"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16304"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16304"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16304"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}