Bun\u0103 ziua, domni\u0219oara Lorena, <\/em><\/p>\n Sper c\u0103 am nimerit formula de adresare corect\u0103. Ne e foarte greu nou\u0103, b\u0103rba\u021bilor, \u00een timpurile astea #metoo, s\u0103 \u0219tim cum s\u0103 ne adres\u0103m unei femei f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 se supere.<\/em> Eu \u00eemi iubesc mult copii. A\u0219 fi preferat s\u0103 fie am\u00e2ndoi heterosexuali, s\u0103 se \u00eensoare \u0219i s\u0103 aib\u0103 copii, dar, dac\u0103 a\u0219a a ie\u0219it, vreau s\u0103-i fiu aproape \u0219i s\u0103-i ar\u0103t c\u0103 \u00eel accept a\u0219a cum este, \u0219i c\u0103 nu trebuie s\u0103 se fereasc\u0103 de mine, dar nu prea \u0219tiu cum s\u0103 pun problema. Tu scrii mereu articole despre gay, a\u0219a c\u0103 o s\u0103 te rog s\u0103-mi dai \u0219i mie ni\u0219te idei.<\/em><\/p>\n Mul\u021bumesc.<\/em> Drag\u0103 X,<\/p>\n Pentru \u00eenceput, ne-ar ajuta teribil \u015fi pe mine, \u015fi pe tine, s\u0103 nu mim\u0103m c\u0103 #metoo ar fi problema. Problema e m\u00e2rl\u0103nia unui procent considerabil de b\u0103rba\u0163i, #metoo e doar expresia nemul\u0163umirii, angoasei, panicii, traumelor celor afectate de asta. A\u015fa cum nu r\u0103scoala lui Horia, Clo\u015fca \u015fi Cri\u015fan a fost problema, ci impozitarea exagerat\u0103 a \u0163\u0103ranilor, care i-a adus pe ace\u015ftia la sap\u0103 de lemn.<\/p>\n “Doamn\u0103”, dac\u0103 femeia e c\u0103s\u0103torit\u0103, “domni\u015foar\u0103”, dac\u0103 nu e, sau simplu, Lorena. \u015ei ai rezolvat problema.<\/p>\n \u015ei acum, s\u0103 trecem la subiect.<\/p>\n M\u0103 bucur mult c\u0103 alegi s\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i \u00een\u0163elegi \u015fi s\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i accep\u0163i copilul a\u015fa cum este, \u015fi m\u0103 bucur \u015fi mai mult c\u0103 solici\u021bi ajutor c\u00e2nd nu e\u0219ti sigur cum s\u0103 procedezi. Iar pentru a simplifica, hai s\u0103 ne g\u00e2ndim cum vei ac\u0163iona tu, ca tat\u0103, cu cel\u0103lalt fiu.<\/p>\n Vei \u00eencepe s\u0103 vorbe\u015fti cu el despre femei de pe acum? C\u00e2nd \u00eenc\u0103 se joac\u0103 cu lop\u0103\u0163ica \u00een \u0163\u0103r\u00e2n\u0103? \u00cendr\u0103znesc s\u0103 cred c\u0103 nu. Cel mult \u00eei \u00eenve\u0163i pe am\u00e2ndoi s\u0103 nu accepte acadele de la neni ciuda\u0163i, \u00eembr\u0103ca\u0163i \u00een parpalac, \u015fi \u00een rest, \u00eei la\u015fi s\u0103 se bucure de copil\u0103rie.<\/p>\n Valabil \u015fi pentru copilul “diferit”.<\/p>\n Apoi, emo\u0163iile omului legate de propria lui identitate sexual\u0103 tind s\u0103 se cristalizeze \u00een timp. \u015ei fac o analogie, s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00een\u0163elegi.<\/p>\n Ai \u015ftiut din prima zi c\u00e2nd ai cunoscut-o pe mama celor doi copii c\u0103 ea va fi\u00a0 so\u0163ia ta? Probabil c\u0103 nu. Probabil c\u0103 \u0163i s-a p\u0103rut foarte dr\u0103gu\u0163\u0103 \u015fi at\u00e2t. Apoi, treptat, v-a\u0163i cunoscut mai bine \u015fi lucrurile s-au \u00eent\u00e2mplat de la sine.<\/p>\n Dac\u0103 \u00eencercai s\u0103 for\u0163ezi o rela\u0163ie \u00eentr-o faz\u0103 prea timpurie, nu era\u0163i acum c\u0103s\u0103tori\u0163i \u015fi femeia defila \u015fi ea cu o pancart\u0103 #metoo.<\/p>\n Valabil \u015fi pentru orientarea sexual\u0103 a copilului t\u0103u. Acum, la opt ani, \u00eenc\u0103 nu-\u00eei sunt clare foarte multe lucruri legate de el \u015fi lucrurile care-l atrag.<\/p>\n Sfatul meu pe moment e s\u0103-l tratezi p\u0103rinte\u015fte, normal, s\u0103-l educi s\u0103 nu fac\u0103 t\u00e2mpenii, s\u0103-l lauzi c\u00e2nd ia zece, s\u0103-l duci periodic la mall, etc., ca orice alt p\u0103rinte.<\/p>\n Apoi, c\u00e2nd se apropie de v\u00e2rsta adolescen\u0163ei, ini\u0163iaz\u0103 discu\u0163ia “\u00eentre b\u0103rba\u0163i” cum o faci \u015fi cu fiul cel mic. Dar celui mare \u00eei vei explica, pe un ton foarte neutru, ca \u015fi cum ai discuta starea vremii, \u015fi faptul c\u0103 exist\u0103 persoane atrase de membri ai aceluia\u015fi sex, sunt cam 10% din popula\u0163ie, \u015fi c\u0103 nu e nimic \u00een neregul\u0103 cu asta. Tu doar \u00eei spui c\u0103 e bine ca un t\u00e2n\u0103r s\u0103 fie informat, \u015fi c\u0103 te poate considera \u00eentotdeauna cel mai bun prieten al lui.<\/p>\n De ce un ton neutru?<\/p>\n Pentru c\u0103 un adolescent, mai ales unul de alt\u0103 orientare, trece prin toate panicile universului. P\u00e2n\u0103 \u00een\u0163elege cine este, cum este el construit pe interior. P\u00e2n\u0103 se \u00eemprietene\u015fte cu noua lui identitate, cea de adult.<\/p>\n Un ton prea personal l-ar putea determina s\u0103 se inhibe \u015fi mai tare, sau s\u0103 se simt\u0103 atacat. Poate nu e preg\u0103tit s\u0103-\u0163i fac\u0103 m\u0103rturisiri. Un ton neutru, lipsit de judec\u0103\u0163i, \u00eel va face s\u0103 se simt\u0103 \u00een largul lui.<\/p>\n Poveste\u015fte-i cum erai tu la 14 ani, descrie-i primele tale st\u00e2ng\u0103cii, r\u00e2zi de tine \u00eensu\u0163i, \u015fi spune-i c\u0103 poate veni la tine cu toat\u0103 sinceritatea, c\u0103 tu e\u015fti taic\u0103-su \u015fi \u00eei vei fi mereu al\u0103turi.<\/p>\n Poate atunci \u00eei vei declan\u015fa o confesiune, poate c\u0103 va dura c\u00e2teva luni.<\/p>\n Ai r\u0103bdare, las\u0103-l s\u0103 \u0163i se deschid\u0103 \u00een ritmul lui. \u00cen acest timp, f\u0103-l s\u0103 simt\u0103 c\u0103 poate avea \u00eencredere \u00een tine \u015fi c\u0103 \u00eei e\u015fti un sprijin.<\/p>\n Adolescen\u0163ii, indiferent de orientare, au cea mai mare nevoie de sprijin \u015fi se pricep cel mai pu\u0163in s\u0103 \u00eel cear\u0103.<\/p>\n Te felicit pentru c\u0103 e\u015fti un tat\u0103 grijuliu \u015fi cu mintea deschis\u0103.<\/p>\n PS: \u0218i, pentru c\u0103 nu \u00eentotdeauna feminitatea sau masculinitatea are leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu orientarea sexual\u0103 a combatantului, dat fiind c\u0103 exist\u0103 mul\u021bi straight extrem de feminini \u0219i mul\u021bi gay care par mai fioro\u0219i dec\u00e2t Chuck Norris, m-a\u0219 amuza s\u0103 fie exact invers. B\u0103iatul zambil\u0103 s\u0103 fie hetero, \u0219i cel\u0103lalt s\u0103-\u021bi vin\u0103 acas\u0103 cu prietenul lui cel nou, Mircea.<\/p>\n Sper c\u0103 am fost util\u0103,<\/p>\n Lorena.<\/p>\n Foto: pixabay.com.<\/p>\n ***<\/p>\n \u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n *** Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care mi-o...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":16623,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16621","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/mail.png?fit=640%2C387&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16621","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16621"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16621\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16626,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16621\/revisions\/16626"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/16623"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16621"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16621"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16621"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n\u00ce\u021bi scriu pentru c\u0103 am v\u0103zut c\u0103 dai ni\u0219te r\u0103spunsuri foarte de bun sim\u021b oamenilor care \u00ee\u021bi spun problema lor, \u0219i cumva, asta m-a \u0219i f\u0103cut s\u0103 te v\u0103d \u00eentr-o lumin\u0103 nou\u0103. \u00cenainte, te vedeam ca pe o muiere dr\u0103coas\u0103, pus\u0103 s\u0103 fac\u0103 milit\u0103rie cu to\u021bi am\u0103r\u00e2\u021bii care nu nimereau cuvintele care \u00ee\u021bi pl\u0103ceau \u021bie. Cu oamenii care \u00ee\u021bi scriu la Po\u0219ta redac\u021biei e\u0219ti nea\u0219teptat de miloas\u0103 \u0219i asta m\u0103 face s\u0103 cred c\u0103 m-ai putea ajuta.<\/em>
\nAm doi b\u0103ie\u021bei. Unul mai mare, de opt ani, unul mai mic, de \u0219ase. \u0102la mai mare a fost mereu diferit. Vorbe\u0219te \u0219i se alint\u0103 ca o fat\u0103, pe c\u00e2nd era mic, se \u00eenv\u00e2rtea numai sub fustele bunic\u0103-sii \u0219i ale prietenelor ei, se d\u0103dea cu parfumul maic\u0103-sii s\u0103 miroas\u0103 frumos, la gr\u0103dini\u021b\u0103 s-a \u00eemprietenit numai cu feti\u021be \u0219i se juca cu p\u0103pu\u0219i \u0219i carioci \u00eempreun\u0103 cu ele, \u0219i i-am tot prins pe al\u021bi b\u0103ie\u021bei purt\u00e2ndu-se foarte ur\u00e2t cu el. El nu ne zicea nimic nou\u0103, p\u0103rin\u021bilor, dar am remarcat eu ni\u0219te episoade \u0219i le-am promis \u0103lora c\u0103 dac\u0103 se mai iau de el, le rup urechile.<\/em>
\nA \u00eenceput \u0219coala, e un elev foarte bun, dar, cum cre\u0219te, observ c\u0103 are mersul, \u021binuta, totul foarte diferit.<\/em>
\nAm \u00eencercat s\u0103-l dau la fotbal, apoi la tenis. G\u0103se\u0219te mereu scuze s\u0103 nu se duc\u0103, \u0219i abonamentele au expirat.<\/em>
\nCel mic, de \u0219ase ani, un b\u0103iat ca to\u021bi b\u0103ie\u021bii, \u00eei place s\u0103 se joace de-a b\u0103taia \u0219i de-a mon\u0219trii, are doar prieteni b\u0103ie\u021bi, e exact cum eram eu la v\u00e2rsta lui.<\/em><\/p>\n
\nX.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\")
<\/a><\/p>\n
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"