{"id":18239,"date":"2019-08-22T08:58:47","date_gmt":"2019-08-22T05:58:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=18239"},"modified":"2019-08-22T08:58:47","modified_gmt":"2019-08-22T05:58:47","slug":"arunca-in-decedatii-ma-tii-la-cos","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/arunca-in-decedatii-ma-tii-la-cos\/","title":{"rendered":"Arunc\u0103 \u00een deceda\u021bii m\u0103-tii la co\u0219"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Cu acest articol, blogul lorenalupu.com se aliniaz\u0103 campaniei #aruncamlacos a prim\u0103riei sectorului 3. Cu o precizare. Noi aruncam deja la co\u0219. Cei targeta\u021bi de campanie sunt m\u00e2rlanii b\u0103tubili peste bot cu un bocanc solid de munte, \u0219i tagline-ul corect este Arunc\u0103 \u00een mor\u021bii m\u0103-tii la co\u0219, b\u0103i, \u021b\u0103ran p\u00e2rlit.<\/p>\n<p>Sau mai pe larg: Bag pula \u00een m\u0103-ta aia curv\u0103 proast\u0103 care era prea ocupat\u0103 s\u0103 sug\u0103 pula pe bonuri de mas\u0103 s\u0103 te \u00eenve\u021be s\u0103 arunci la co\u0219 \u0219i \u00een tac-tu s\u0103m\u00e2n\u021bar care se pi\u0219a \u00een bosche\u021bi, arunc\u0103 la co\u0219, futu-\u021bi g\u00e2tu m\u0103-tii de \u00eeng\u0103lat \u0219i de r\u0103p\u0103nos, \u00eenmorm\u00e2nta-te-ar urma\u0219ii \u00eentr-un sac de gunoi, preferabil par\u021bial plin \u0219i de alte jeguri, c\u0103 tot ai fost o mizerie de om \u0219i un izvor de mizerie toat\u0103 via\u021ba ta.<\/p>\n<p>Ne place s\u0103 gui\u021b\u0103m c\u0103 oioioi ce jeg e \u00een Bucure\u0219ti. C\u0103 vai autorit\u0103\u021bile, c\u0103 vai prim\u0103ria, c\u0103 vai pula calului. Dar \u00een sectorul III e mereu plin de ma\u0219ini specializate care spal\u0103 \u0219i ud\u0103, de domni \u0219i doamne \u00een vest\u0103 neon de la Salubritate. \u0218i de \u00eenc\u0103 ceva. De o multitudine de co\u0219uri de gunoi, containere, tomberoane, tomberonele, tomberona\u0219e, \u0219i din acelea de gunoi sortat pe categorii, \u0219i din acelea cu gunoi buluc &#8211; gr\u0103mad\u0103, toate cu un singur scop.<\/p>\n<p>S\u0103-l educe pe boul prost de rom\u00e2n s\u0103 arunce \u00een pizda r\u0103p\u0103noas\u0103 \u0219i br\u00e2nzoas\u0103 a m\u0103-sii la co\u0219.<\/p>\n<p>\u0218i oric\u00e2t\u0103 munc\u0103 s-ar face, \u00een c\u00e2teva ore, jegul e tot acolo.<\/p>\n<p>De ce?<\/p>\n<p>Pentru c\u0103 boul prost de rom\u00e2n arunc\u0103 \u00een pizda r\u0103p\u0103noas\u0103 \u0219i br\u00e2nzoas\u0103 a m\u0103-sii pe jos \u0219i pe oriunde se nimere\u0219te.<\/p>\n<p>De ce mor\u021bii vo\u0219tri de \u00eempu\u021bi\u021bi \u0219i de \u00eeng\u0103la\u021bi se presupune c\u0103 trebuie perpetuu s\u0103 adune al\u021bii dup\u0103 voi?<\/p>\n<p>Ideea acestei post\u0103ri mi s-a n\u0103scut de la urm\u0103toarea experien\u021b\u0103:<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: none; overflow: hidden;\" src=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/plugins\/post.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Florenaalmighty%2Fposts%2F1175771329297582&amp;width=500\" width=\"500\" height=\"242\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>Parcul IOR e printre cele mai frumoase \u0219i mai mari din Bucure\u0219ti. O oaz\u0103 de aer curat \u0219i r\u0103coare \u00eentr-o capital\u0103 sufocat\u0103 de poluare \u0219i de gaze de e\u0219apament. De ce pizda mamelor voastre de \u021b\u0103r\u0103noi jego\u0219i \u0219i m\u00e2rlani nu pute\u021bi p\u0103stra ce are ora\u0219ul frumos, s\u0103 se simt\u0103 bine \u0219i prostul care vine dup\u0103 voi? Vi se rupe m\u00e2na, futu-v\u0103 muma \u00een cur, unde probabil c\u0103 nu se \u0219terge, c\u0103 de aceea v-a crescut at\u00e2t de \u00eeng\u0103la\u021bi, s\u0103 v\u0103 aduna\u021bi zoaiele \u0219i s\u0103 merge\u021bi zece metri, s\u0103 le plasa\u021bi \u00een containerul care \u021bip\u0103 mare, cu litere colorate, #aruncamlacos??<\/p>\n<p>Aceea\u0219i categorie de t\u00e2rlete infect a \u00eenceput s\u0103 mearg\u0103 la Vam\u0103, c\u00e2nd \u00eenc\u0103 era intim\u0103 \u0219i pur\u0103. \u0218i s\u0103-\u0219i lase peturile de bere \u0219i ambalajele de \u021big\u0103ri peste tot. Apoi, \u00een c\u00e2\u021biva ani, c\u00e2nd gunoiul a sporit, <em>obviously,\u00a0<\/em>s\u0103 se dea tot el r\u0103nit \u0219i lovit: \u0102vaaai, nu-mi mai place la Vam\u0103, c\u0103 au venit to\u021bi cocalarii \u0219i acum e jegoas\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u00ce\u021bi arunci mucul de \u021bigar\u0103 pe jos? E\u0219ti parte din problem\u0103, \u00een pizda m\u0103-tii.<\/p>\n<p>\u00ce\u021bi arunci biletul de autobuz compostat pe jos? E\u0219ti parte din problem\u0103, \u00een pizda m\u0103-tii.<\/p>\n<p>\u00ce\u021bi arunci petul de plastic sau cutia de bere pe jos? E\u0218TI PARTE DIN PROBLEM\u0102. \u00ceN PIZDA M\u0102-TII.<\/p>\n<p>\u00ce\u021bi arunci petul de plastic sau cutia de bere spre co\u0219, crez\u00e2ndu-te baschetbalistul pulii calului, \u0219i dac\u0103 nu nimere\u0219ti, o la\u0219i unde a c\u0103zut, c\u0103 neamul prost de tine are oase \u00een burt\u0103 \u0219i nu se apleac\u0103?<\/p>\n<p>E\u0218TI PARTE DIN PROBLEM\u0102.<\/p>\n<p>\u00ceN PIZDA M\u0102-TII.<\/p>\n<p>Sco\u021bi c\u00e2inele la c\u0103care \u0219i nu-i aduni norocelul maroniu, pe care \u00eel n\u0103p\u0103desc instant puzderie de mu\u0219te, \u0219i next thing you know, acelea\u0219i mu\u0219te aterizeaz\u0103 pe ro\u0219iile \u021b\u0103ranilor din pia\u021ba al\u0103turat\u0103?<\/p>\n<p>E\u0218TI PARTE DIN PROBLEM\u0102. \u00ceN PIZDA M\u0102-TII.<\/p>\n<p>\u0218i pot continua a\u0219a p\u00e2n\u0103 mi se defecteaz\u0103 tastatura.<\/p>\n<p>Poate veni orice primar, orice consiliu local, orice partid. La un moment dat, oricine o s\u0103 se sature s\u0103 str\u00e2ng\u0103 dup\u0103 curul t\u0103u del\u0103s\u0103tor \u0219i murdar.<\/p>\n<p>Adun\u0103-\u021bi, \u00een pizda m\u0103-tii, zoaiele, c\u0103 sunt ale tale, \u00een pizda m\u0103-tii, \u0219i arunc\u0103-le \u00een pizda m\u0103-tii la co\u0219.<\/p>\n<p>*<\/p>\n<p>C\u00e2nd eram copil, maic\u0103-mea nu era nici tandr\u0103, nici afectuoas\u0103, dar un lucru a f\u0103cut foarte bine. De cum l\u0103sam dup\u0103 mine ambalaj de bomboan\u0103, coji de portocal\u0103, vreo cutie a unei juc\u0103rii sau orice altceva, \u00eencepea:<\/p>\n<p>-Pune m\u00e2na \u0219i adun\u0103 dup\u0103 tine.<\/p>\n<p>-Aaaacum? m\u0103 mior\u021b\u0103iam eu, cu mintea deja la joac\u0103. Vreau afar\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>-Nu te duci la niciun afar\u0103, p\u00e2n\u0103 nu aduni dup\u0103 tine.<\/p>\n<p>-Aduun mai t\u00e2\u00e2\u00e2rziu.<\/p>\n<p>\u0218i mum\u0103-mea unguroaic\u0103 a dracului \u00eentindea un deget \u00eempungaci spre mine \u0219i zicea:<\/p>\n<p>-Nu. Aduni acum. Sau nu ie\u0219i afar\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>Iar eu m\u0103 g\u00e2ndeam cu obid\u0103 la al\u021bi copii, dup\u0103 care adunau mamele lor, \u0219i m\u0103 \u00eentrebam: dar oare femeia asta nu m\u0103 iube\u0219te chiar deloc?<\/p>\n<p>Anul lui Dumnezeu 2019. Acei al\u021bi copii \u00eenc\u0103 tr\u0103iesc cu impresia c\u0103 o mam\u0103 imaginar\u0103 \u00eei urm\u0103re\u0219te peste tot \u0219i adun\u0103 c\u0103caturile dup\u0103 ei. \u00cen timp ce eu arunc la co\u0219.<\/p>\n<p>Mul\u021bumesc, mam\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>\u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/paypal.me\/Trollywood\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-14577\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=768%2C768&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=160%2C160&amp;ssl=1 160w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=320%2C320&amp;ssl=1 320w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=184%2C184&amp;ssl=1 184w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=600%2C600&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=100%2C100&amp;ssl=1 100w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?w=931&amp;ssl=1 931w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lorenaalmighty\/\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/lorenalupu\">Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/lorena.lup\/\">Instagram<\/a><\/strong>. Sau, mai nou, devino parte a comunit\u0103\u021bii mele pe <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/LorenaLupuTrollywood\/\">Reddit<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Cu acest articol, blogul lorenalupu.com se aliniaz\u0103 campaniei #aruncamlacos a prim\u0103riei sectorului 3. Cu o precizare. Noi aruncam deja la co\u0219. Cei targeta\u021bi de&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":18240,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18239","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/cos.jpg?fit=797%2C517&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18239","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18239"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18239\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18243,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18239\/revisions\/18243"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18240"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18239"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18239"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18239"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}