{"id":18347,"date":"2019-09-08T09:35:27","date_gmt":"2019-09-08T06:35:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=18347"},"modified":"2019-09-08T09:40:13","modified_gmt":"2019-09-08T06:40:13","slug":"sa-fie-atrasi-barbatii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/sa-fie-atrasi-barbatii\/","title":{"rendered":"S\u0103 fie atra\u0219i b\u0103rba\u021bii"},"content":{"rendered":"

S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na trecut\u0103, tratam \u00eentr-un articol comentariile acelea extrem de iritante care repro\u0219au absen\u021ba “feminit\u0103\u0163ii”, a ochilor bl\u00e2nzi de c\u0103prioar\u0103 prins\u0103 \u00een b\u0103taia farurilor, a z\u00e2mbetului t\u00e2mp \u00een poze \u015fi a buclelor de serafim.<\/p>\n

\u015ei printre altele, am relatat un caz \u00eent\u00e2lnit de mine \u00eentr-un cerc de cunoscu\u0163i, unde mama e o prin\u0163es\u0103 tr\u0103itoare \u00een nostalgia turnului de cristal de unde se pi\u015f\u0103 pe omenire prin crinolin\u0103, fiica, o fotbalist\u0103 c\u0103\u0163\u0103r\u0103toare \u00een copaci \u015fi viitoare campioan\u0103 la categoria fluture, \u015fi cum prin\u0163esa blocat\u0103 \u00een tripul Frumoasei din p\u0103durea adormit\u0103 \u00eei ciuntea copil\u0103ria fiic\u0103-sii \u00eencerc\u00e2nd s-o dreseze la ideea asta de feminitate prost \u00een\u0163eleas\u0103, cu voce miorl\u0103it\u0103 \u015fi preten\u0163ia c\u0103 nu \u015ftii s\u0103 desfaci capace de una singur\u0103.<\/p>\n

\u015ei, cum se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103, au intervenit \u00een comentarii gigeii. Gigeii care au s\u0103rit s\u0103-mi mansplain cum c\u0103 nu \u015ftiu s\u0103 apreciez eforturile unei mame bune \u015fi bl\u00e2nde, \u015fi c\u0103 de fapt era important s\u0103 anihilezi toat\u0103 personalitatea copilei respective, “s\u0103 fie atra\u015fi b\u0103rba\u0163ii”.<\/p>\n

S\u0103 ce?<\/p>\n

“S\u0103 fie atra\u015fi b\u0103rba\u0163ii”.<\/p>\n

Dup\u0103 cum se \u0219tie, de-a lungul istoriei, omenirea a obligat femeile la ciuntiri interminabile ale corpului \u015fi vie\u0163ii lor, “s\u0103 fie atra\u015fi b\u0103rba\u0163ii”. De la pansarea extrem\u0103 a piciorului \u00een Orientul \u00cendep\u0103rtat \u015fi centura de castitate din o\u0163el \u00een Europa medieval\u0103, de la \u0163inerea femeii cu sila \u00een harem \u00een Orientul Mijlociu, umilirea celor care nu \u0163ineau cu din\u0163ii de virginitate \u00eenainte de c\u0103s\u0103torie \u015fi privarea femeii de educa\u0163ie \u015fi drepturi peste tot.<\/p>\n

\u015ei, dup\u0103 at\u00e2tea milenii, omenirea a ajuns la concluzia evident\u0103: c\u0103 nu merit\u0103.<\/p>\n

O via\u0163\u0103 mutilat\u0103 \u015fi ciuntit\u0103 \u00een toate felurile, doar pentru a corespunde capriciilor de moment ale sexului opus, nu se justific\u0103 din nici un punct de vedere.<\/p>\n

Atrac\u0163ia b\u0103rba\u0163ilor e un obiectiv important doar pentru acelea dintre femei care opteaz\u0103 o carier\u0103 care s\u0103 monetizeze atrac\u0163ia b\u0103rba\u0163ilor, cum ar fi mult-hulitul videochat, sau orice alt\u0103 form\u0103 de sex work. Dar stai, astea sunt cele mai \u00eenjurate, umilite \u015fi porc\u0103ite femei.<\/p>\n

Altminteri, pentru o femeie care \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi construiasc\u0103 o carier\u0103 s\u0103 zicem unisex, \u00een care aspectul fizic \u015fi disponibilitatea de a te gudura senzual sunt neimportante, “s\u0103 fie atra\u015fi b\u0103rba\u0163ii” mai mult \u00eencurc\u0103. Pentru c\u0103 b\u0103rba\u0163ii \u0103ia “atra\u015fi” \u00eencep brusc s\u0103 g\u00e2ndeasc\u0103 doar cu capul de jos, \u015fi cu orgoliul, \u015fi cu ideea c\u0103 li se datoreaz\u0103 un anumit gen de aten\u0163ie – nope, nu! – \u015fi dac\u0103 treaba nu \u00eent\u00e2lne\u015fte instant gratification, \u00eencep s\u0103 te frece enervant la icre, s\u0103-\u0163i bage str\u00e2mbe peste tot, s\u0103 \u00eencerce strategii de tot rahatul \u015fi s\u0103 devin\u0103 general nepl\u0103cu\u0163i.<\/p>\n

Singurele ini\u0163iative de succes din via\u0163a mea le-am avut cu b\u0103rba\u0163i neatra\u015fi. Al c\u0103ror obiectiv era s\u0103 ias\u0103 treaba impecabil, nu s\u0103 m\u0103 abrambureasc\u0103 pe mine cu vr\u0103jeal\u0103 proast\u0103.<\/p>\n

Iar un b\u0103rbat atras o s\u0103 g\u0103se\u015fti indiferent de cum ar\u0103\u0163i, indiferent de c\u00e2te kilograme ai, indiferent dac\u0103 z\u00e2mbe\u015fti \u00een poze, indiferent dac\u0103 alergi maratonul an de an.<\/p>\n

E taman invers.<\/p>\n

Cu c\u00e2t REFUZI S\u0102 te transformi \u00een mizda generic\u0103 \u015fi mieun\u0103toare, cu at\u00e2t o s\u0103 atragi oameni, \u015fi b\u0103rba\u0163i, \u015fi femei, prin personalitatea ta bine definit\u0103 \u015fi ce e numai al t\u0103u.<\/p>\n

\u015ei nu-i vei atrage la modul superficial, poate dau \u015fi eu o buc\u0103 la p\u0103pu\u015fica aia, ci \u00eei vei face s\u0103 te iubeasc\u0103 sau, pe unii, s\u0103 te urasc\u0103, la nivelul profund, pentru cine e\u015fti tu ca om.<\/p>\n

\u015ei acum o s\u0103 fiu sincer\u0103 p\u00e2n\u0103 la cap\u0103t: dintre un “atras” care \u00eentreab\u0103 “cf, frum-y, te plakk” \u015fi \u0163i-e clar c\u0103 a mai trimis acest mesaj la altele 200, \u015fi habar nu are cu cine vorbe\u015fte, \u015fi un hater \u00eenver\u015funat, care \u00ee\u0163i scrie \u00een 20 de r\u00e2nduri de ce \u00ee\u0163i ur\u0103\u015fte existen\u0163a pe p\u0103m\u00e2nt, \u00eel respect mai mult pe hater. \u0102la m\u0103car \u015ftie cine e\u015fti, ce faci, \u015fi are sentimente clare legate de tine ca om, nu ca “pies\u0103, bucat\u0103, p\u0103pu\u015fic\u0103.”<\/p>\n

S\u0103 concluzionez: nu, mamele care \u00ee\u015fi constr\u00e2ng fiicele s\u0103 duc\u0103 un anumit mod de via\u0163\u0103, destinat pl\u0103cerii \u015fi atrac\u0163iei altora nu fac o treab\u0103 bun\u0103. Pe patul de moarte, amintirile care te fac s\u0103 z\u00e2mbe\u015fti nu vor fi niciodat\u0103: “am mimat aia, aia \u015fi aia, s\u0103 fie fericit Gigel”. Amintirile care te fac s\u0103 z\u00e2mbe\u015fti \u00een timp ce luneci spre nefiin\u0163\u0103 sunt: “Am TR\u0102IT aia, aia \u015fi aia.”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

\u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

***
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S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na trecut\u0103, tratam \u00eentr-un articol comentariile acelea extrem de iritante care repro\u0219au absen\u021ba “feminit\u0103\u0163ii”, a ochilor bl\u00e2nzi de c\u0103prioar\u0103 prins\u0103 \u00een b\u0103taia farurilor, a...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":18349,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18347","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/Mask-03.jpg?fit=900%2C506&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18347","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18347"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18347\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18352,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18347\/revisions\/18352"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18349"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18347"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18347"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18347"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}