{"id":18676,"date":"2019-12-02T12:37:53","date_gmt":"2019-12-02T09:37:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=18676"},"modified":"2019-12-02T12:37:53","modified_gmt":"2019-12-02T09:37:53","slug":"not-posta-redactiei-dar-tu-pentru-ce-traiesti","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/not-posta-redactiei-dar-tu-pentru-ce-traiesti\/","title":{"rendered":"Not Po\u0219ta redac\u021biei: Dar tu pentru ce tr\u0103ie\u0219ti?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na asta, ne-am luat cu rezultatele alegerilor \u0219i cu ziua na\u021bional\u0103, \u0219i n-am primit nimic \u00een po\u0219ta redac\u021biei, ceea ce e p\u0103cat, pentru c\u0103 multe scrisori con\u021bin probleme pe care mie nu mi-ar da prin cap s\u0103 le abordez.<br \/>\nDe aceea, o s\u0103 vorbim despre o scurt\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2mplare care mi-a fost relatat\u0103 \u00een sec\u021biunea de comentarii de o fat\u0103. \u0218i anume: <\/p>\n<p>Ea are un business \u00eenfloritor, ceea ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 munce\u0219te de diminea\u021ba p\u00e2n\u0103 seara, \u0219i periodic merge la cursuri, la recalific\u0103ri, s\u0103 \u00eenve\u021be mai mult, ceea ce, am putea spune, e imaginea perfect\u0103 a carieristului de succes. Eu o respect \u0219i o admir pentru asta. Dar o m\u0103tu\u0219\u0103 b\u0103tr\u00e2n\u0103 s-a g\u0103sit \u00eentr-o zi s\u0103-i fac\u0103 o moral\u0103 lung\u0103, lat\u0103 \u0219i nes\u0103rat\u0103. Ceva de genul: fat\u0103, ce-i \u00een capul t\u0103u, ai trecut de 30, de ce nu faci copii.<\/p>\n<p>Un lucru pe care nu l-am \u00een\u021beles niciodat\u0103 este fwterea de grij\u0103 a unor oameni fa\u021b\u0103 de poten\u021biali copii pe care ar trebui s\u0103-i creasc\u0103 \u0219i s\u0103-i \u00eentre\u021bin\u0103 al\u021bii. Da, boss, te califici s\u0103 pretinzi copii acolo unde pui p\u00e2inea pe mas\u0103. Acolo unde nu, decizia copul\u0103rii cu urma\u0219i pur \u0219i simplu nu e a ta, \u0219i cei \u00een cauz\u0103 au destule date legate de propriile vie\u021bi \u00eenc\u00e2t s\u0103 decid\u0103 singuri dac\u0103 da sau dac\u0103 ba, \u0219i ai o singur\u0103 op\u021biune: s\u0103 respec\u021bi asta, \u00een mor\u021bii m\u0103-tii. <\/p>\n<p>Eu UR\u0102\u0102\u0102\u0102SC intromisiunea unde nu fierbe oala personal\u0103 din dotare \u0219i am retezat-o at\u00e2t de ur\u00e2t, de c\u00e2te ori rudele mele \u00een v\u00e2rst\u0103 au \u00eencercat s\u0103-mi vorbeasc\u0103 despre copii, \u00eenc\u00e2t acum moodul general e: da, e nepoata asta a noastr\u0103 un pic s\u0103rit\u0103 de pe fix, purta\u021bi-v\u0103 frumos cu nebunii c\u0103 \u0219i ei sunt oameni, nu vorbi\u021bi despre copii cu ea c\u0103 face ur\u00e2t. Sau \u00een fine, vorbi\u021bi despre copiii vo\u0219tri, o s\u0103 le aduc\u0103 portocale \u0219i banane, dar nu-i sugera\u021bi c\u0103 ar trebui s\u0103 emane unul \u0219i ea pe orificiul vaginal, c\u0103 o s\u0103 v\u0103 r\u0103spund\u0103 c\u0103 ia anticoncep\u021bionale \u0219i c\u00e2nd face sex cu femei, just to make sure. <\/p>\n<p>Al\u021bii, \u00eens\u0103, nu-s at\u00e2t de buni la setat boundaries cum sunt eu. \u0218i rudele continu\u0103 s\u0103-i frece la icre agasant, intruziv \u0219i monoton. O alt\u0103 prieten\u0103, scriitoare, a ajuns s\u0103-\u0219i \u0219tearg\u0103 contul personal de Facebook. Cum a\u0219a? Nu doar c\u0103 rudele o frecangeau cu insisten\u021be t\u00e2mpite legate de rolul ei de animal f\u0103t\u0103tor; dar nici unul nu acordase vreo secund\u0103 de interes faptului c\u0103 ea scria, \u0219i nu-i cump\u0103raser\u0103 vreo carte vreodat\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>De ce nu dai pur \u0219i simplu block \u0103lora care-\u021bi consum\u0103 timp \u0219i energie cu inep\u021bii? am \u00eentrebat-o eu.<br \/>\nPentru c\u0103 se vor duce s\u0103 se pl\u00e2ng\u0103 mamei.<br \/>\n\u0218i maic\u0103-ta nu le poate spune s\u0103-\u0219i \u021bin\u0103 nasul \u00een oalele personale din dotare?<br \/>\nMama nu e o fire conflictual\u0103. <\/p>\n<p>Definim diferit o fire conflictual\u0103.<br \/>\nPentru mine, o fire conflictual\u0103 este o persoan\u0103 care INI\u021aIAZ\u0102 conflict. Care se ia de al\u021bii din senin, f\u0103r\u0103 ca acei al\u021bii s\u0103-i fi f\u0103cut ceva.<br \/>\nFaptul c\u0103 \u00eel iei pe \u0103la conflictual de mo\u021b \u0219i-l bagi ad\u00e2nc \u0219i ap\u0103sat \u00een pizd\u0103 de mam\u0103 nu e pentru c\u0103 vrei conflict, ci taman pentru c\u0103 vrei pace. \u0218i \u0219tii c\u0103 a ceda \u00een chestii m\u0103runte nu va face dec\u00e2t s\u0103-i induc\u0103 prostului ideea c\u0103 \u021bine vr\u0103jeala.<br \/>\n\u00cen nemuritoarele cuvintele ale lui RuPaul: I always try to come from a place of love, but sometimes you just have to break it down for a motherfucker. <\/p>\n<p>Revenind la prima fat\u0103 \u0219i la m\u0103tu\u0219\u0103-sa: dup\u0103 ce fata a explicat c\u0103 acum nu are timp \u0219i energie pentru \u00eempuire, pentru c\u0103 zb\u00e2rn\u00e2ie businessul a\u0219a cum nici nu a \u00eendr\u0103znit s\u0103 viseze, baba s-a trezit s\u0103 o \u00eentrebe brusc urm\u0103toarea imens\u0103 m\u0103g\u0103rie: <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Dar tu pentru ce tr\u0103ie\u015fti?&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>Huh? <\/p>\n<p>Fata mea a \u00een\u0163eles c\u0103 problemele sunt mai grave dec\u00e2t par, drept care a g\u0103sit o scuz\u0103 s\u0103 se extrag\u0103 din conversa\u0163ie \u015fi a \u00eentins-o de la locul faptei. <\/p>\n<p>Serios, DAR TU PENTRU CE TR\u0102IE\u015eTI? <\/p>\n<p>Exact ca \u00een cazul fetei scriitoare, \u015fi \u00een cazul fetei antreprenoare sunt to\u0163i ace\u015fti imbecili cu care e \u00eenrudit\u0103, \u015fi care tind s\u0103 trateze ni\u015fte ocupa\u0163ii legitime \u015fi aduc\u0103toare de venit ca pe ace\u015fti g\u0103rg\u0103uni neimportan\u0163i. <\/p>\n<p>\u00cencearc\u0103 s\u0103-i spui bodegarului din col\u0163 c\u0103 bodega lui e un rahat \u015fi, dac\u0103 nu se \u00eempuie\u015fte, pentru ce tr\u0103ie\u015fte. Sau oric\u0103rui mic businessman de orice calibru. \u00ce\u0163i iei una peste bot de-\u0163i rectifici problemele dentare pe via\u0163\u0103. E fenomenal de c\u00e2t bullshit scap\u0103 b\u0103rba\u0163ii, doar pentru c\u0103 par mai mari \u015fi mai amenin\u0163\u0103tori. Sau, dac\u0103 au parte de bullshit, m\u0103car \u00eel au din partea unor persoane de la care primesc \u015fi sex, deci se compenseaz\u0103 pe undeva. Noi avem parte de bullshit de la o gr\u0103mad\u0103 de oameni de la care nu primim absolut nimic compensator, doar pentru c\u0103 nu p\u0103rem \u00een stare s\u0103 le footem un bocanc \u00een muie. <\/p>\n<p>Dincolo de lipsa imens\u0103 de respect pe care baba \u00een cauz\u0103 o ar\u0103ta fa\u0163\u0103 de activitatea (subliniez, DE SUCCES) a nepoatei, partea cea mai grosolan\u0103 \u015fi mai oripilant\u0103 e insinuarea c\u0103, dac\u0103 nu ai copii, via\u0163a ta e inutil\u0103 \u015fi lipsit\u0103 de valoare. \u015ei c\u0103 ai trebui extirpat\u0103 ca un g\u00e2ndac de buc\u0103t\u0103rie, sau ceva.<\/p>\n<p>Acum, exist\u0103 destule femei pe care le cunosc, \u015fi care au unul, doi, trei copii. Dar cele care fac treaba asta a\u015fa cum trebuie nu sunt \u00een nici un caz cele care au genul \u0103sta de nevroze \u015fi psihoze (via\u0163a mea nu are sens) \u015fi au f\u0103tat doar ca s\u0103 creeze unul. <\/p>\n<p>V\u0103 da\u0163i seama c\u00e2t\u0103 presiune pe ni\u015fte umeri ginga\u015fi de copil? &#8220;D\u0103 \u015fi mie un sens.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>Pwla mea, mergi la terapie, mergi la cursuri de recalificare, get a life, g\u0103se\u015fte-\u0163i pentru ce s\u0103 tr\u0103ie\u015fti, \u015fi vorbim dup\u0103. <\/p>\n<p>Copilul nu are menirea magic\u0103 s\u0103-\u0163i dea pentru ce s\u0103 tr\u0103ie\u015fti \u015fi nu ai de ce s\u0103-l \u00eencarci de genul \u0103sta de povar\u0103. E o fiin\u0163\u0103 care are nevoie de aten\u0163ie, dragoste \u015fi ghidare pentru a deprinde principii corecte, nu de vampirismul emo\u0163ional al unei fiin\u0163e defecte psihic. <\/p>\n<p>Poate c\u0103 prietena mea va face copii, dup\u0103 ce va atinge un punct de echilibru profesional. Sau poate nu. Decizia e a ei. Dar m\u0103car ea va face copii din motive corecte, \u015fi le va fi o mam\u0103 echilibrat\u0103, care \u00eei va putea \u00eenv\u0103\u0163a ceva extrem de important: lec\u0163ia succesului. Pentru c\u0103 a tr\u0103it experien\u0163a succesului. <\/p>\n<p>Pe c\u00e2nd genul de muieri ratate, f\u0103r\u0103 preocup\u0103ri reale, puse doar pe aolit \u015fi v\u0103ic\u0103real\u0103, ca m\u0103tu\u015f\u0103-sa, pot cre\u015fte copii doar dup\u0103 chipul \u015fi asem\u0103narea lor. Iar acelor copii le va lua ani de autoeducare, terapie \u015fi reevaluare a propriilor priorit\u0103\u0163i, s\u0103 scape de povara rolului de sens al vie\u0163ii cuiva \u015fi complexul victimei societ\u0103\u0163ii. <\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>\u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Po\u0163i sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/paypal.me\/Trollywood\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-14577\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=768%2C768&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=160%2C160&amp;ssl=1 160w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=320%2C320&amp;ssl=1 320w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=184%2C184&amp;ssl=1 184w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=600%2C600&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=100%2C100&amp;ssl=1 100w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?w=931&amp;ssl=1 931w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>***<br \/>\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lorenaalmighty\/\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/lorenalupu\">Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/lorena.lup\/\">Instagram<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na asta, ne-am luat cu rezultatele alegerilor \u0219i cu ziua na\u021bional\u0103, \u0219i n-am primit nimic \u00een po\u0219ta redac\u021biei, ceea ce e p\u0103cat, pentru c\u0103&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":18157,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18676","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/wow.jpg?fit=640%2C426&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18676","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18676"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18676\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18677,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18676\/revisions\/18677"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18157"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18676"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18676"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18676"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}