Te admir mult \u015fi am v\u0103zut c\u0103 ai un mod foarte lucid de a aborda problemele oamenilor, le r\u0103spunzi foarte frumos \u015fi dai sfaturi ca o sor\u0103 mai mare.<\/strong><\/p>\n A\u015fa c\u0103 a\u015f vrea \u015fi eu s\u0103 te \u00eentreb: ce te faci cu oamenii ultra competitivi de la job? \u0102ia cu care \u00een mod normal nu ai avea mare lucru de \u00eemp\u0103r\u0163it, dar care nu mai au loc de tine, care caut\u0103 sa te combat\u0103, elimine, discrimineze, miceasc\u0103 etc? \u00cen mediul t\u0103u, cred c\u0103 ai parte din plin de a\u015fa ceva, p\u00e2n\u0103 la urm\u0103, arti\u015ftii se lupt\u0103 pentru aten\u0163ie, competi\u0163ia e masiv\u0103, din asta tr\u0103iesc \u015fi a\u015fa e normal.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00cen mediul meu, e pu\u0163in diferit, c\u0103 suntem economi\u015fti, deci \u015foareci plictisi\u0163i de birou.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00cen Rom\u00e2nia, am \u00eent\u00e2lnit diverse situa\u0163ii \u015fi specii de oameni, (…) M-am v\u0103zut de multe ori discriminat\u0103, criticat\u0103 aiurea \u015fi des plecam cu fric\u0103 \u00een vacan\u0163\u0103, pentru ca la \u00eentoarcere s\u0103 m\u0103 g\u0103sesc scoas\u0103 de pe lista de proiect, f\u0103r\u0103 explica\u0163ii. Lucram \u00eentr-un mediu cu majoritatea b\u0103rba\u0163i. Nefiind conflictual\u0103, am suportat unele chestii, dar am \u015fi \u00een\u0163eles c\u0103 problema nu e la mine. Din p\u0103cate, nu am \u00eenv\u0103\u0163at s\u0103 reac\u0163ionez \u015fi s\u0103 returnez lovitura. Nu am un caracter agresiv, dar nu cred c\u0103 ar fi t\u00e2rziu s\u0103 mi-l formez (am doar 29 de ani), cu condi\u0163ia s\u0103 nu-mi consume energie vital\u0103.<\/strong><\/p>\n Dup\u0103 ce am plecat in UK, am dat de un alt mediu, volum mare de munc\u0103, dar oamenii relaxa\u0163i \u015fi mul\u0163umi\u0163i de via\u0163a lor, toate bune \u015fi frumoase, p\u00e2n\u0103 am ajuns s\u0103 am o coleg\u0103 rom\u00e2nc\u0103. Culmea e c\u0103, dup\u0103 experien\u0163a din Ro, credeam c\u0103 e mai bine s\u0103 lucrezi cu femeile. Am f\u0103cut gre\u015feala s\u0103 ajut o individ\u0103 s\u0103 se angajeze, de\u015fi \u00eemi era o necunoscut\u0103 (nu mai fac asta ever) \u015fi, fix din momentul \u00een care s-a v\u0103zut cu contractul semnat, a intrat in competi\u0163ie cu mine, de zici c\u0103 sunt cel mai mare obstacol \u00een calea fericirii ei.<\/strong><\/p>\n Nu sunt lucruri neap\u0103rat pe fa\u0163\u0103, dar nici eu nu sunt proast\u0103.<\/strong><\/p>\n De c\u00e2te ori vorbesc, se vede c\u0103 o deranjeaz\u0103 \u015fi \u00ee\u015fi roade unghiile, se foie\u015fte p\u00e2n\u0103 reu\u015fe\u015fte s\u0103 zic\u0103 ceva \u015fi s\u0103 vorbeasc\u0103 peste mine, deci sa capteze ea aten\u0163ia, m\u0103 contrazice sau m\u0103 ia \u00een r\u00e2s subtil, face diverse jocuri de domina\u0163ie pe motive absolut copil\u0103re\u015fti, g\u0103se\u015fte tot felul de motive s\u0103 se pozi\u0163ioneze cumva deasupra mea, inclusiv la ma\u015fina de cafea sau la coada de la cantin\u0103. Orice fac sau spun eu, ea a f\u0103cut ceva mai mare, mai grandios. \u00cen ce prive\u015fte partea profesional\u0103, m\u0103 copiaz\u0103 \u00een tot ce fac \u015fi vrea s\u0103 fac\u0103 totul mai repede \u015fi mai bine ca mine. Munce\u015fte p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00eei vine r\u0103u, de\u015fi \u00een cultura asta \u00een care tr\u0103im chiar nu e necesar. \u015ei nu, lucrurile nu sunt doar \u00een mintea mea, c\u0103 m-am verificat \ud83d\ude0a. M\u0103 bucur totu\u015fi c\u0103 m-am prins la timp \u015fi nu am apucat s\u0103 \u00eei dau informa\u0163ii valoroase sau s\u0103 devin o carte deschis\u0103 pentru ea.<\/strong><\/p>\n In\u0163eleg c\u0103 competi\u0163ia makes the world go round, \u015fi c\u0103 a\u015fa ne mai motiv\u0103m unii pe al\u0163ii (de\u015fi experien\u0163a mi-a ar\u0103tat c\u0103 oamenii mint de \u00eenghea\u0163\u0103 apele), dar partea proast\u0103 e c\u0103 m-am umplut de ur\u0103 \u015fi mi-am dezvoltat un al \u015faselea sim\u0163 fa\u0163\u0103 de atitudini de genul \u0103sta. <\/strong><\/p>\n Nu mai v\u0103d lucrurile pozitive sau omul, m\u0103 v\u0103d \u00eentr-un ring de box, obligat\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 ap\u0103r sau s\u0103 atac. Lupta asta nu e necesar\u0103 \u015fi te poate seca de energie aiurea. \u00cen\u0163eleg c\u0103 o fi complexat\u0103 (e \u015fi ur\u00e2\u0163ic\u0103), dar eu chiar nu vin la munc\u0103 s\u0103 fiu \u00een r\u0103zboi cu ea. \u00cemi fac treaba foarte bine \u015fi sunt apreciat\u0103. Ce pot s\u0103 fac s\u0103 fie iar totul zen? Nu pot sta \u00een alert\u0103 tot timpul si nici nu vreau s\u0103 \u00eei alimentez pornirile. Am v\u0103zut totu\u015fi c\u0103 e \u015fi naiv\u0103, \u015fi m-a\u015f putea distra pu\u0163in, pot plasa “pastile” \u015fi s\u0103-i stric planurile, dar sincer, nu-mi place s\u0103 provoc intrigi, chiar am o via\u0163\u0103 privat\u0103 \u015fi destule ocupa\u0163ii, nu-mi iau energia din a\u015fa ceva.<\/strong><\/p>\n Tu ce ai face?<\/strong><\/p>\n Iart\u0103-mi mesajul a\u015fa lung.<\/strong> ***<\/p>\n Drag\u0103 X.,<\/p>\n Problema e \u00een ceea ce tu nume\u015fti natura ta non-conflictual\u0103, iar eu numesc la\u015fitate. S\u0103 zicem c\u0103 m\u00e2ine te-ar diagnostica medicii cu o tumor\u0103 pe un ovar. Ai aplica strategia: “pot plasa “pastile” \u015fi s\u0103-i stric planurile, dar sincer, nu-mi place s\u0103 provoc intrigi, chiar am o via\u0163\u0103 privat\u0103 \u015fi destule ocupa\u0163ii, nu-mi iau energia din a\u015fa ceva.”??\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Fuck no. Te-ai duce s\u0103 te documentezi care sunt op\u0163iunile de tratament, ai alege solu\u0163ia cea mai safe \u015fi cu \u015fanse mai mari de vindecare \u015fi, dac\u0103 asta ar presupune s\u0103 intri \u00een opera\u0163ie m\u00e2ine, ai intra \u00een opera\u0163ie m\u00e2ine.<\/p>\n Oamenii cu un caracter de javre infecte sunt, ca \u015fi tumorile maligne, izvor de celule canceroase care se multiplic\u0103 singure \u015fi se hr\u0103nesc din organismul nostru. B\u0103rba\u0163ii primesc sfatul corect de la ta\u0163ii lor: “Dac\u0103 motherfucker nu se potole\u015fte, punch motherfucker in the face”. Numai femeile se tortureaz\u0103 ele pe ele \u015fi una pe alta cu acest bullshit al ignoratului \u015fi al noncompetitivit\u0103\u0163ii, c\u0103 tu e\u015fti o doamn\u0103.<\/p>\n Fii doamn\u0103 cu domnii \u015fi golanc\u0103 cu golanii. Dinte pentru dinte, s\u00e2nge pentru s\u00e2nge \u015fi vei constata cum, miraculos, comportamentul multora va deveni semnificativ mai bun. Singurele dou\u0103 locuri unde \u00eentorci \u015fi cel\u0103lalt obraz sunt<\/p>\n a) la makeup artist<\/p>\n b) la un spanking consensual.<\/p>\n \u00cen rest, faci ce \u00ee\u0163i spune sora ta mai mare Lorena, \u015fi anume:<\/p>\n A) Din secunda asta, \u00eencetezi s\u0103 o iei pe t\u00e2r\u00e2tur\u0103 \u00een serios.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n S\u0103 te umpli tu de ur\u0103 pentru o vac\u0103 proast\u0103, care nu \u015ftie s\u0103 aprecieze prietenul la nevoie? No way, m’am. Din secunda asta, o prive\u015fti pe borfet\u0103 ca pe o glum\u0103 \u015fi o tratezi ca atare. Tot ce face ea, tot ce zice, toate sfor\u0163\u0103rile ei de a te dep\u0103\u015fi sunt bancuri de doi lei, \u015fi reac\u0163ionezi ca la bancuri de doi lei.<\/p>\n I’m all for sisterhood. Sus\u0163in femei, ajut femei, ridic moral femei. Dar c\u00e2nd femeile r\u0103spund la asta ca ni\u015fte gher\u0163oaice, invita\u0163ia s\u0103 \u00eemi sug\u0103 pula e oficial deschis\u0103.<\/p>\n B) \u00cencerci un dialog \u00eentre patru ochi, \u00een care pui problema pe \u015fleau:\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n “Drag\u0103 Marcela, \u0163in s\u0103-\u0163i reamintesc, \u00een caz c\u0103 nu \u0163i-ai luat lecitina, c\u0103 ai jobul \u0103sta datorit\u0103 mie. Eu am pus o vorb\u0103 pentru tine. Deci, care e problema ta \u015fi cum o putem solu\u0163iona?”<\/p>\n Dar fii ferm\u0103 \u015fi seac\u0103 c\u00e2nd o \u00eentrebi asta, nu l\u0103sa loc de ezitare. Descrie-i \u00een detaliu ce face. \u015ei preg\u0103te\u015fte-te s\u0103 nege, s\u0103 te mint\u0103 \u00een fa\u0163\u0103 \u015fi s\u0103 o dea la \u00eentors: “A, eu nuuu…. \u0162i se pare. E\u015fti paranoic\u0103, fath\u0103\u0103\u0103. Eu nu am dec\u00e2t respect c\u0103 m-ai ajutat”.<\/p>\n Bine, Marcela, \u00eei spui tu, eu am \u00eencercat s\u0103 ne \u00een\u0163elegem ca oamenii. Sau \u00ee\u0163i temperezi r\u0103ut\u0103\u0163ile la adresa mea \u015fi m\u0103 tratezi cu respectul datorat unui om care a intervenit pentru tine, sau \u00eentoarcem foaia.<\/p>\n Aici, exist\u0103 \u015fanse ca Marcela s\u0103 fie genul la\u015f, tupeist doar cu \u0103ia pe care \u00eei percepe slabi, \u015fi s\u0103 dea \u00eend\u0103r\u0103t, nu din respect, ci din fric\u0103.<\/p>\n C) Deschizi r\u0103zboiul.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Dar exist\u0103 \u015fansa ca r\u0103utatea Marcelei s\u0103-i biruie la\u015fitatea, \u015fi s\u0103 continue, pentru c\u0103, exact ca \u00een bancul cu scorpionul. “O s\u0103 murim am\u00e2ndoi”. “Nu conteaz\u0103, \u0103sta e caracterul meu”.<\/p>\n Arde-o pe unde apuci.<\/p>\n Te deranjeaz\u0103 \u00een timp ce vorbe\u015fti? Call her out. “Observ c\u0103 pe colega mea Marcela o preocup\u0103 alte lucruri \u015fi vrem s\u0103 afl\u0103m ce anume”.<\/p>\n Se foie\u015fte? Call her out. “M\u0103 scuza\u0163i, lu\u0103m o pauz\u0103 de dou\u0103 minute, p\u00e2n\u0103 se reculege colega mea Marcela”.<\/p>\n \u00ce\u015fi roade unghiile? Call her out. “\u00cemi cer scuze c\u0103 divaghez, dar vreau s\u0103-i recomand colegei mele Marcela un mani-pedi bun,”<\/p>\n De c\u00e2te ori \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103 te \u00eencalece, \u00eencalec-o tu pe ea \u015fi f\u0103-o \u0163inta glumelor \u015fi r\u00e2setelor.<\/p>\n De asemenea, aplic\u0103 regula plus unu.<\/p>\n Marcela te-a deranjat azi? \u00cei comba\u0163i deranjul cu glume, PLUS \u00eei g\u0103se\u015fti ceva defect de repro\u015fat \u00een fa\u0163a marii Adun\u0103ri Na\u0163ionale.<\/p>\n Important: trateaz\u0103 totul ca pe un joc, nu te ambala \u015fi nu l\u0103sa s\u0103 te consume. Iar obiec\u0163iile tale s\u0103 fie mereu bine \u00eentemeiate.<\/p>\n Believe me, cu genul \u0103sta de javr\u0103, refuzul de a o confrunta e ca \u015fi cum ai ignora o tumor\u0103 malign\u0103. P\u00e2n\u0103 te dezmetice\u015fti, \u0163i s-a \u00eentins pe tot organismul.<\/p>\n Cum zicea RuPaul: I always come from a place of love, but sometimes you have to break it down for a motherfucker.<\/p>\n Sper c\u0103 \u0163i-am fost util\u0103,<\/p>\n Lorena.<\/p>\n *** ***<\/p>\n \u00ce\u0163i plac textele Trollywood? Sus\u0163ine \u015fi tu proiectul.<\/p>\n *** ***<\/p>\n Ascult\u0103 Jet pe Spotify<\/a><\/strong>, cump\u0103r\u0103 piesa pe iTunes<\/strong><\/a> sau pe Amazon Music<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care mi-o...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":19034,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19032","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/notebook-3397136_640.jpg?fit=640%2C497&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19032","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19032"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19032\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19036,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19032\/revisions\/19036"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/19034"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19032"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19032"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19032"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nMul\u0163umesc si mult respect,<\/strong>
\nX.<\/strong><\/p>\n
\nImage by Monfocus<\/a> from Pixabay<\/a><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\")
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\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n