{"id":19551,"date":"2020-05-13T11:02:48","date_gmt":"2020-05-13T08:02:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=19551"},"modified":"2020-05-13T11:51:55","modified_gmt":"2020-05-13T08:51:55","slug":"posta-redactiei-2-parintii-si-conspiratiile","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/posta-redactiei-2-parintii-si-conspiratiile\/","title":{"rendered":"Po\u015fta redac\u0163iei 2: P\u0103rin\u0163ii \u015fi conspira\u0163iile"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care mi-o trimite\u0163i pe mail, pe birou@lorenalupu.com, \u015fi g\u0103sim o solu\u0163ie, pe care oricum n-o ve\u0163i urma, dar m\u0103car ne distr\u0103m.<\/p>\n

\u015ei prev\u0103d: “Dar Lorenaaa, de ce persoanei \u0103steia i-ai r\u0103spuns a doua zi, iar eu a\u015ftept o s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 pentru lunea viitoare, c\u00e2nd ai tu rubrica regulat\u0103?”<\/p>\n

Pentru c\u0103 persoana asta e donator al blogului, iar donatorilor le r\u0103spund repede \u015fi accept din partea lor \u015fi “mi-ar pl\u0103cea s\u0103 scrii despre cutare”. C\u00e2nd un om face un efort s\u0103 te sus\u0163in\u0103, faci \u015fi tu un efort s\u0103-i ar\u0103\u0163i apreciere.<\/p>\n

\u015ei misiva de data asta:<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“Drag\u0103 Lorena,\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
Am nevoie de un sfat.\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n
Primesc adesea de la mama tot felul de filmule\u021be pe youtube \u015fi link-uri legate de pandemie, Bill Gates, noua ordine mondial\u0103 etc. Oric\u00e2t de delicat sau mai pu\u021bin delicat \u00eencerc s\u0103 le resping (de multe ori le ignor complet), rezult\u0103 c\u0103 sunt sp\u0103lat\u0103 pe creier \u015fi nu \u00een\u021beleg.\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n
Pe de alt\u0103 parte, sunt \u00eengrijorat\u0103 pentru c\u0103 v\u0103d cum persoane la care \u021bin \u00ee\u015fi otr\u0103vesc mintea \u015fi nu \u015ftiu cum a\u015f putea ajuta.<\/strong><\/div>\n
Cum s\u0103 abordez situa\u021bia?\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Mul\u021bumesc,\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n
X”\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Drag\u0103 X,<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u00cent\u00e2mpl\u0103tor ne-am nimerit pe aceea\u015fi problem\u0103. \u015ei anume: mama e printre secuii care vor extrem de tare autonomie “pentru c\u0103 Bucure\u015ftiul ne fur\u0103 tot”. Ea nu \u00een\u0163elege c\u0103 adev\u0103ratul ho\u0163 din zon\u0103, cel care a desp\u0103durit \u015fi cel care a \u00eenghe\u0163at salariile e exact UDMR-ul ei iubit, pe care l-a votat cu sfin\u0163enie de la \u00eenfiin\u0163are, \u015fi sistemul de fur\u0103ciune pesedist e “fiecare ciorde\u015fte acas\u0103 \u015fi reuni\u0163i ciordim \u00een centru”.<\/div>\n
\u015ei nu \u00een\u0163elege c\u0103 autonomia nu va garanta dec\u00e2t faptul c\u0103 vor fi jecm\u0103ni\u0163i de acum \u00eenainte \u00een ungure\u015fte, nu \u00een rom\u00e2ne\u015fte, de aceia\u015fi ho\u0163i care se bat \u00een piept cu c\u0103r\u0103mida etnic\u0103, s\u0103 orbeasc\u0103 contribuabilul \u015fi s\u0103-i fure \u015fi chilo\u0163ii de pe ou\u0103.<\/div>\n
\u015ei c\u00e2nd i-o spun, reac\u0163ioneaz\u0103 ca Dracula c\u00e2nd flutur\u0103 Van Helsing usturoiul.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Exact ca tine, am \u00eencercat s\u0103-i spun frumos, am \u00eencercat s\u0103-i spun ur\u00e2t, dar nu am ob\u0163inut dec\u00e2t dram\u0103, lacrimi \u015fi “puteam s\u0103 \u015ftiu c\u0103 o s\u0103 cresc o rom\u00e2nc\u0103 \u015fovin\u0103 ca tine”.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Deci, a girl recunoa\u015fte o lupt\u0103 pierdut\u0103 \u015fi nu mai insist\u0103.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
*<\/div>\n
\u015ei totu\u015fi, m\u0103 \u00eentrebi tu, eu pentru de ce plm \u00ee\u0163i donez, doar ca tu s\u0103-mi spui c\u0103 asta e?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Nu. Hai s\u0103 fim un pic diploma\u0163i \u015fi s\u0103 ne punem \u00een situa\u0163ia p\u0103rin\u0163ilor no\u015ftri.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Sunt ni\u015fte oameni \u00een v\u00e2rst\u0103. \u0162inu\u0163i cu sila \u00een case de trei luni, speria\u0163i de \u015ftiri. Evolu\u0163ia aceasta tehnologic\u0103 extrem de rapid\u0103 \u00eei dep\u0103\u015fe\u015fte. Ai stat probabil cu maic\u0103-ta dou\u0103 ore la telefon s-o \u00eenve\u0163i s\u0103-\u015fi descarce \u015fi configureze Whatsapp. \u015ei asta dac\u0103 nu cumva maic\u0103-ta are Nokia 3310 cu snake, cum are a mea. (C\u00e2nd m\u0103 duc acas\u0103, joc snake \u00een ne\u015ftire pe telefonul ei, btw. E pl\u0103cerea mea vinovat\u0103.)<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Imagineaz\u0103-\u0163i o lume care \u0163i-e din ce \u00een ce mai inaccesibil\u0103, cu un avans tehnologic pe care \u0163i-e din ce \u00een ce mai greu s\u0103-l urm\u0103re\u015fti \u015fi cu oameni care vorbesc un jargon care \u0163i-e din ce \u00een ce mai neclar.<\/div>\n
OK.<\/div>\n
Wellcome to experien\u0163a prezent\u0103 a p\u0103rin\u0163ilor no\u015ftri.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
De ce \u00eei atrag conspira\u0163iile?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Pentru c\u0103 pornesc exact de la nivelul de necunoa\u015ftere al omului la care prind conspira\u0163iile, \u015fi \u00eei furnizeaz\u0103 ni\u015fte explica\u0163ii care paraziteaz\u0103 FRICA DE NECUNOSCUT<\/strong> \u015fi SUSPICIUNEA C\u0102 TOTUL E O FOR\u0162\u0102 MALEFIC\u0102<\/strong>. Exact cele dou\u0103 axe de coordonate care au transformat religia \u00een opiul maselor de needuca\u0163i, milenii \u00een \u015fir.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
OK. Acum, ce putem face?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Nu, nu ne cert\u0103m \u015fi mai cu seam\u0103 nu \u00eei facem \u00een fa\u0163\u0103 “sp\u0103la\u0163i pe creier”.<\/div>\n
\u015ei iat\u0103 de ce nu.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
P\u0103rin\u0163ii no\u015ftri ne-au schimbat scutecele, ne-au \u015fters la kuhr \u015fi ne-au min\u0163it c\u0103 exist\u0103 Mo\u015f Cr\u0103ciun. Cu nu foarte mul\u0163i ani \u00een urm\u0103, ne puteau turna orice bra\u015foav\u0103 gogonat\u0103, \u015fi noi \u00eei credeam, pentru c\u0103 eram mici \u015fi naivi.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Acum, c\u0103 suntem mai mari dec\u00e2t ei, avem mereu c\u00e2te o replic\u0103 smart \u015fi \u015ftim totul mai bine – noi, cei nu demult mici \u015fi min\u0163ibili \u00een voie – le reamintim parc\u0103 de dou\u0103 ori mai acut de sic transit gloria mundi.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u015ei atunci, p\u0103rin\u0163ii no\u015ftri, cei pu\u0163in cei care s-au ocupat, au fa\u0163\u0103 de noi o frustrare de tipul “De c\u00e2nd a ajuns oul s\u0103 dea lec\u0163ii g\u0103inii”.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Taic\u0103-miu, care n-a cotizat niciun chior pensie alimentar\u0103, n-are forma asta de frustrare, pentru c\u0103 nu \u015fi-a sacrificat meciul de fotbal de s\u00e2mb\u0103t\u0103 pentru serbarea mea \u015fi n-a \u00eenv\u0103\u0163at logaritmii cu mine. Dar mama da, \u015fi taman de aceea, pot \u00een\u0163elege de unde vine aceast\u0103 frustrare. Gen: Eu te \u015ftergeam de muci \u015fi acum \u00eemi dai tu lec\u0163ii?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Taman de aceea, p\u0103rin\u0163ii vo\u015ftri nu vor admite s\u0103 piard\u0103 o discu\u0163ie \u00een contradictoriu cu noi<\/strong>, nici dac\u0103 le demonstr\u0103m negru pe alb c\u00e2t a furat UDMR \u00een jude\u0163ul Covasna.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u015ei eu, care-\u0163i foot \u00een gur\u0103 un troll de pe net p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00ee\u015fi taie penisul \u015fi ia calea c\u0103lug\u0103riei, poc\u0103indu-se c\u0103 a deranjat vreodat\u0103 o femeie, tind s-o las pe mama \u00een pace de la un punct \u00eencolo, pentru c\u0103, spre deosebire de trollul c\u0103ruia nu-i datorez nimic (ok, poate\u00a0 s\u0103-l trec Dun\u0103rea pe un pod de pwle), mama mi-a pus p\u00e2ine pe mas\u0103 18 ani.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u015ei atunci, ce facem?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u0162ine-o ocupat\u0103, s\u0103 nu-\u0163i trimit\u0103 ea linkuri, trimite-i tu linkuri ei.\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Un link excelent cu o tanti care face g\u0103lu\u015fte cu prune.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Un link fabulos cu un blog culinar, cu o re\u0163et\u0103 de care n-a auzit.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Un link la un clipule\u0163 cu prietenia dintre un c\u00e2ine lup \u015fi un pui de pisic\u0103 adoptat.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Un link la un episod din “Vrei s\u0103 fii miliardar”.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u0162ine-o pe maic\u0103-ta ocupat\u0103 cu chestii inofensive \u015fi dr\u0103gu\u0163e, \u015fi atunci nu va avea timp s\u0103 mediteze la cum a fabricat Angela Merkel virusul \u00een sera ei de castrave\u0163i.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u015ei c\u00e2nd deschizi discu\u0163ii, deschide-le pe teme calde \u015fi dr\u0103g\u0103la\u015fe. C\u00e2nd trimite linkuri conspira\u0163ioniste sau \u00ee\u0163i zice c\u0103 UDMR e salvatorul ungurilor (yup, \u00eei salveaz\u0103 de propriile lor p\u0103duri \u015fi resurse, ar fi r\u0103spuns Lorena de acum zece ani), ignor\u0103 pur \u015fi simplu \u015fi \u00eentreab-o ceva\u00a0 f\u0103r\u0103 leg\u0103tur\u0103, ca de exemplu, uite bluza A \u015fi bluza B, pe care o port cu blugii C.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Sper c\u0103 \u0163i-am fost util\u0103,<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Lorena.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n

***<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i place acest blog, ai avut vreodat\u0103 inten\u0163ia s\u0103-l sus\u0163ii dar ai tot am\u00e2nat, acum ar fi un moment foarte bun.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

***
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a>.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Ascult\u0103 Jet pe Spotify<\/a><\/strong>, cump\u0103r\u0103 piesa pe iTunes<\/strong><\/a> sau pe Amazon Music<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9373,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19551","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/FACEPALM.png?fit=800%2C486&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19551","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19551"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19551\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19572,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19551\/revisions\/19572"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9373"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19551"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19551"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19551"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}