Sunt mama unei copile de 15 ani \u0219i nu \u0219tiu dac\u0103 eu, ca p\u0103rinte, \u00eei mai pot ei explica lucrurile obiectiv, cu privire la subiectul \u201e\u00eencrederea \u00een sine\u201d.<\/strong> X.<\/strong><\/p>\n ***<\/p>\n Drag\u0103 X.,<\/p>\n E foarte complicat.<\/p>\n Prin \u00eens\u0103\u0219i natura adolescen\u021bei\u00a0 – perioada \u00een care ne deta\u0219\u0103m de \u00eengrijirea \u0219i controlul p\u0103rin\u021bilor \u0219i ne adapt\u0103m la rolul nostru \u00een societate – fiica ta crede extrem de pu\u021bin \u00een ce \u00eei spui tu, \u00ee\u021bi ia complimentele drept alinturi \u0219i vr\u0103jeal\u0103 menite s\u0103 \u00eei adoarm\u0103 vigilen\u021ba \u0219i maxima ei sensibilitate e orientat\u0103 acum spre feedbackul exterior.<\/p>\n O nevast\u0103 p\u0103r\u0103sit\u0103 nu are cum s\u0103 conving\u0103 un b\u0103rbat chitit pe divor\u021b c\u0103 ea e so\u021bia perfect\u0103, chit c\u0103 probabil c\u0103 i-a c\u0103lcat mai multe c\u0103m\u0103\u0219i \u0219i i-a g\u0103tit mai multe ciorbe dec\u00e2t fufa de 20 de ani u\u0219or de dominat cu care e \u00eenlocuit\u0103. Nu, nu compar cele dou\u0103 situa\u021bii. Spun doar c\u0103 efectul ra\u021biunii c\u00e2nd omul e cu foxusul pe alte direc\u021bii e nul.<\/p>\n Dar poate la\u0219i postarea asta deschis\u0103 accidental pe mobil, iar eu m\u0103 voi adresa tuturor adolescen\u021bilor de 15 ani care citesc acest text.<\/p>\n Dragilor,<\/p>\n Da, e cam nasol. P\u0103r \u00een zone aiurea, \u021b\u00e2\u021be prea mari, sau prea mici, zece kile prea mult, zece kile prea pu\u021bin \u0219i lista continu\u0103. \u00cen schimb, sora voastr\u0103 mai mare \u0219i mai t\u00e2r\u0219\u00e2it\u0103 Lorena are ni\u0219te solu\u021bii care, aplicate, vor simplifica mult lucrurile.<\/p>\n 1. Defectele voastre uria\u0219e sunt mai mult \u00een mintea voastr\u0103.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Oamenii din jur v\u0103 plac a\u0219a cum sunte\u021bi, nu fac inventar de defecte, iar \u0103ia care stau \u0219i b\u00e2rfesc toat\u0103 ziua pe toat\u0103 lumea sunt ni\u0219te tri\u0219ti goi pe interior \u0219i hate-ul lor nu e despre voi, ci despre faptul c\u0103 sunt pro\u0219ti \u0219i r\u0103i.<\/p>\n Prin urmare.<\/p>\n 2. Nu lua\u021bi asupra voastr\u0103 ce spun rata\u021bii. Mai ales cei c\u0103rora nu le datora\u021bi nimic. C\u00e2nd unul se ia de \u021b\u00e2\u021bele \u0219i curul vostru, practic plimb\u0103 o pancart\u0103 pe care scrie Sunt prost \u0219i semnalizez.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n E despre ei, nu despre voi.<\/p>\n \u0218i \u00eenc\u0103 o chestie. Sub 18 ani, legea e de partea ta. Ajunge s\u0103 spui Am 15 ani \u0219i e ilegal s\u0103-mi spui lucrurile astea.<\/p>\n Iar dac\u0103 insist\u0103, sco\u021bi mobilul \u0219i \u00eei spui: Te filmez \u0219i te reclam la poli\u021bie. Ce faci tu se nume\u0219te h\u0103r\u021buirea sexual\u0103 a minorului.<\/p>\n \u0218i dac\u0103 insist\u0103, chiar \u00eel filmezi \u0219i \u00eel reclami.<\/p>\n 3. Niciodat\u0103 n-o s\u0103 te plac\u0103 toat\u0103 lumea, \u0219i e perfect ok.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00ce\u021bi place mult fata popular\u0103 a clasei, dar ea te ignor\u0103 \u0219i atunci te consideri ur\u00e2t\u0103 sau uncool? Exist\u0103 \u0219anse s\u0103 te ignore pentru c\u0103 se simte amenin\u021bat\u0103 de tine. Poate c\u0103 e\u0219ti mai frumoas\u0103, poate c\u0103 e\u0219ti mai inteligent\u0103, poate te place unul de care e ea atras\u0103, poate ai\u00a0 medii mai mari.<\/p>\n E perfect \u00een regul\u0103 s\u0103 nu te plac\u0103 ni\u0219te oameni. Nu trage de ei. Las\u0103-i \u00een pace. Ai prietenii t\u0103i, care te plac, bucur\u0103-te c\u0103 \u00eei ai \u0219i distreaz\u0103-te cu ei.<\/p>\n 4. Dac\u0103 cineva nu te place, e pierderea lui.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n E\u0219ti un om bun, cu foarte multe de oferit. Cine nu vede asta, nu \u0219tie ce pierde. Tu nu ai de ce s\u0103 cer\u0219e\u0219ti aten\u021bie. Fii sigur\u0103 pe tine, \u0219i vine singur\u0103 de la cine trebuie.<\/p>\n 5. Nu ai nimic de demonstrat nim\u0103nui.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n O parte din jocule\u021bele de rahat ale tipilor nesim\u021bi\u021bi sunt provoc\u0103ri de tipul La pariu c\u0103 nu faci asta \u0219i Dac\u0103 nu faci asta, e\u0219ti fraier\u0103.<\/p>\n Refuz\u0103 genul \u0103sta de jocule\u021be. \u0102ia care au nevoie de manevre de genul s\u0103 manipuleze lume sunt ni\u0219te tri\u0219ti \u0219i ni\u0219te rata\u021bi \u0219i nu ai timp de ei.<\/p>\n 6. Dac\u0103 nu \u00ee\u021bi place greutatea ta, f\u0103 mi\u0219care.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00cen adolescen\u021b\u0103 se poate sl\u0103bi cel mai eficient cu sport. \u0218i \u0219tii ce mai face sportul? \u00ce\u021bi spore\u0219te for\u021ba fizic\u0103, te \u00eemprietene\u0219te cu corpul t\u0103u \u0219i te face s\u0103 te mi\u0219ti mai bine.<\/p>\n \u0218i sportul arde gr\u0103simea de peste tot, inclusiv… ai ghicit.. pe cea din s\u00e2ni. Multe femei care sl\u0103besc cu sport constat\u0103 c\u0103 au s\u00e2nii mai mici.<\/p>\n De\u0219i jum\u0103tate din cititorimea masculin\u0103 hetero m\u0103 va \u00eenjura pentru acest sfat.<\/p>\n 7. Welcome to the jungle, o s\u0103 tot ai aten\u021bie sexual\u0103 de la diver\u0219i.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n \u0218i e dreptul t\u0103u s-o refuzi, s\u0103 spui nu, s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi comunici v\u00e2rsta, s\u0103-i faci pedofili, \u0219i chiar s\u0103 reclami la poli\u021bie pe \u0103ia care nu \u00een\u021beleg de vorb\u0103 bun\u0103. P\u00e2n\u0103 c\u00e2nd faci 18 ani, E ILEGAL S\u0102 \u021bi se adreseze cuvinte sexuale ca minor. Iar dup\u0103, \u00eei expediezi scurt \u0219i sec. Timpul t\u0103u e comoara ta personal\u0103 \u0219i nu \u00eel merit\u0103 dec\u00e2t cei pe care-i alegi tu.<\/p>\n 8. Nu-\u021bi ascunde s\u00e2nii. Altele dau mii de euro s\u0103-\u0219i pun\u0103 pungi de silicon. Nu sta str\u00e2mb\u0103 \u0219i nu c\u0103uta s\u0103-i maschezi. Sunt ai t\u0103i. Poart\u0103-i m\u00e2ndr\u0103, ca o regin\u0103.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Unu la m\u00e2n\u0103: nimeni nu are dreptul s\u0103 pun\u0103 m\u00e2na pe tine. Pe ei cu at\u00e2t mai pu\u021bin. Dar s\u00e2nii mari \u0219i frumo\u0219i sunt un motiv de m\u00e2ndrie. Pe vremea r\u0103posatului Playboy, Hugh Hefner pl\u0103tea 10.000 de dolari pentru o \u0219edin\u021b\u0103 foto cu s\u00e2ni mari naturali. \u00cenainte de apari\u021bia fotografiei, modelele de nuduri c\u00e2\u0219tigau o avere dac\u0103 aveau s\u00e2ni mari \u0219i frumo\u0219i.<\/p>\n Bucur\u0103-te c\u0103 natura a fost generoas\u0103 cu tine. C\u00e2nd mai cre\u0219ti, o s\u0103 le descoperi \u0219i utilitatea practic\u0103.<\/p>\n 9. Tu, mintea ta, ideile tale, spiritul t\u0103u, corpul t\u0103u – e tot ce ai mai bun.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Nu \u00eencerca s\u0103 fii altcineva. Pre\u021buie\u0219te \u0219i bucur\u0103-te de ceea ce ai, iube\u0219te-\u021bi calit\u0103\u021bile, corecteaz\u0103-\u021bi defectele – dar f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 accep\u021bi nepolite\u021be \u0219i tratament oribil pentru ele – \u0219i fii eroul principal al propriei tale pove\u0219ti. Nu Gigel, nu Titel, nu Costel. TU e\u0219ti eroul principal. Nu irosi timp investind \u00een al\u021bii, dac\u0103 ei nu investesc \u00een tine.<\/p>\n 10. Dac\u0103 cineva e rude sau b\u0103g\u0103re\u021b, pune-l \/ pune-o la punct \u0219i seteaz\u0103 boundaries.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Societatea le-a \u00eenv\u0103\u021bat pe femei c\u0103 doamnele tac \u0219i ignor\u0103, dar \u0219tii ce face a\u0219a-numitul ignorat? \u00cel convinge pe prost c\u0103 poate semnaliza \u00een continuare, c\u0103 nu-i rade nimeni o pervers\u0103 de la T\u00e2rgu Ocna peste bot.<\/p>\n Pe c\u00e2nd fermitatea \u0219i punerea prompt\u0103 la punct impun respect.<\/p>\n Apropo de iubire vs. respect, axioma Lorena Lupu este urm\u0103toarea: Oamenii care te iubesc te pot tr\u0103da oric\u00e2nd, \u0219i de obicei, o fac. Oamenii care te respect\u0103, \u00eens\u0103, nu te vor desconsidera \u0219i nu te vor subestima niciodat\u0103.<\/p>\n Iar dac\u0103 cineva \u00ee\u0219i face sport din a te s\u00e2c\u00e2i repetat, rupe rela\u021bia f\u0103r\u0103 regrete. Cine vrea s\u0103 m\u00e2nuiasc\u0103 marionete, s\u0103 se angajeze la Teatrul de P\u0103pu\u0219i. Tu nu e\u0219ti p\u0103pu\u0219a nim\u0103nui.<\/p>\n Sper c\u0103 \u021bi-am fost util\u0103,<\/p>\n Lorena.<\/p>\n ***<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Dac\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i place acest blog, ai avut vreodat\u0103 inten\u0163ia s\u0103-l sus\u0163ii dar ai tot am\u00e2nat, acum ar fi un moment foarte bun.<\/p>\n *** ***<\/p>\n Ascult\u0103 Jet pe Spotify<\/a><\/strong>, cump\u0103r\u0103 piesa pe iTunes<\/strong><\/a> sau pe Amazon Music<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care mi-o...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9823,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19598","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/tallgirl-e1589767782217.jpg?fit=450%2C321&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19598","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19598"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19598\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19601,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19598\/revisions\/19601"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9823"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19598"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19598"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19598"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nDeun\u0103zi am avut un conflict legat de un sutien, pe care eu i l-am sp\u0103lat \u0219i am uitat s\u0103-l usuc p\u00e2n\u0103 la momentul plec\u0103rii ei din cas\u0103. \u00cencerc\u00e2nd s\u0103 o conving c\u0103 \u00eei este bun \u0219i un am\u0103r\u00e2t de sutien de-ale mele, copila mi s-a dest\u0103inuit printre lacrimi, c\u0103 ea este suficient de timorat\u0103 c\u00e2nd iese afar\u0103, auzind expresii de genul: \u201eIa uite ce cur mare are aia!\u201d sau \u201eMoam\u0103, ce \u021b\u00e2\u021be are aia!\u201d \u0219i c\u0103 f\u0103r\u0103 sutienul-minune ar fi o varz\u0103. Men\u021bionez c\u0103 a luat cca 10 kg \u00een ultimul an, iar despre s\u00e2nii ei zice c\u0103-s mari \u0219i c\u0103 \u00eei ur\u0103\u0219te cu spume.<\/strong>
\nDac\u0103 ai timp, r\u0103spunde-mi \u0219i \u00eenva\u021b\u0103-m\u0103, rogu-te, referindu-te la v\u00e2rsta asta sensibil\u0103 a adolescentei mele, cum s\u0103 procedez pentru a-i spori \u00eencrederea \u00een ea \u00eens\u0103\u0219i \u0219i cum ar trebui ea ghidat\u0103 pentru a face fa\u021b\u0103 provoc\u0103rilor acestea de pe-afar\u0103. \u0218tiu c\u0103 \u0219i noi am trecut prin astfel de faze, cu diferen\u021ba c\u0103 noi nu aveam discu\u021bii de genul \u0103sta cu p\u0103rin\u021bii no\u0219tri, ba mai mult, ne mai \u0219i certau pentru \u201eprostiile astea\u201d, cum spuneau ei.<\/strong>
\n\u00ce\u021bi mul\u021bumesc!<\/strong><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\")
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\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a>.<\/p>\n