{"id":19641,"date":"2020-05-25T11:58:47","date_gmt":"2020-05-25T08:58:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=19641"},"modified":"2020-05-25T11:58:47","modified_gmt":"2020-05-25T08:58:47","slug":"posta-redactiei-marlanul-de-la-munca","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/posta-redactiei-marlanul-de-la-munca\/","title":{"rendered":"Po\u015fta redac\u0163iei: M\u00e2rlanul de la munc\u0103"},"content":{"rendered":"

Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care mi-o trimite\u0163i pe mail, pe birou@lorenalupu.com, \u015fi g\u0103sim o solu\u0163ie, pe care oricum n-o ve\u0163i urma, dar m\u0103car ne distr\u0103m.<\/p>\n

\u015ei misiva de data asta:<\/p>\n

Bun\u0103,\u00a0 Lorena,<\/strong><\/div>\n
Sunt o cititoare a ta, te urm\u0103resc de ceva timp, am o problem\u0103 si am nevoie de o privire critic\u0103 din afara, cred c\u0103 e\u0219ti persoana cea mai in m\u0103sur\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 sf\u0103tuiasc\u0103. <\/strong><\/div>\n
Lucrez la stat, \u0219i aici po\u021bi fi bou \u0219i bigot f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 se sesizeze cineva, problema mea este ca am un astfel de coleg, idiot, misogin, pup\u0103tor de dorsal etc, dar care e bine v\u0103zut de sefi, jobul meu este destul de legat de al lui, el fiind tot timpul nesim\u021bit, mi-e destul de greu s\u0103 \u00eemi performez treaba, eu sunt foarte emotiv\u0103 \u0219i nu m\u0103 descurc \u00een confrunt\u0103ri, de multe ori am t\u0103cut \u0219i mi-am blestemat zilele dup\u0103, g\u00e2ndindu-m\u0103 la ce a\u0219 fi putut zice sau face.<\/strong><\/div>\n
\u00cen orice caz, \u015feful nostru nu ia atitudine, cum s\u0103-l tratez ca s\u0103 nu m\u0103 mai stresez \u015fi s\u0103 imi pot face treaba?<\/strong><\/div>\n
Mul\u0163umesc,<\/strong><\/div>\n
X.\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Drag\u0103 X.,<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Din ce mi-ai scris, nu reiese foarte clar dac\u0103 ai vorbit cu \u015feful, s\u0103-i spui c\u0103 ai o problem\u0103. Sau doar te-ai a\u015fteptat s\u0103-\u0163i intuiasc\u0103 disconfortul \u015fi s\u0103 ia ini\u0163iativa, ceea ce foarte pu\u0163ini b\u0103rba\u0163i fac.<\/div>\n
\u00cen orice caz, po\u0163i s\u0103-l consideri pe m\u00e2rlanul \u0103sta ca pe un antrenament gratuit din partea lui Dumnezeu pe partea de promptitudine \u00een reac\u0163ii, asertivitate \u015fi b\u0103gare \u00een mor\u0163i de mam\u0103, calit\u0103\u0163i care nu trebuie s\u0103 lipseasc\u0103 unui om modern.<\/div>\n
Iar pentru a vedea cum r\u0103m\u00e2i calm \u00een fa\u0163a unui bully, cum \u00eei demontezi cu umor \u015fi relaxare mar\u0163afoielile \u015fi cum la\u015fi paranoia \u015fi ideile lui fixe s\u0103 treac\u0103 pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 tine, d\u0103 un goag\u0103l cu jurizare Lorena Lupu iUmor 2020.<\/div>\n
OK, dar tu e\u015fti la munc\u0103, \u015fi atunci treaba se complic\u0103.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Ce trebuie s\u0103 ui\u0163i din start cu genul \u0103sta de m\u00e2rlan este “sunt foarte emotiv\u0103 \u015fi nu m\u0103 descurc \u00een confrunt\u0103ri”. Exact de aceea \u00ee\u015fi permite boul s\u0103 fie bou, pentru c\u0103 mizeaz\u0103 c\u0103 nu-i smulgi momi\u0163ele \u015fi i le \u00eenm\u00e2nezi f\u0103cute paneu. Din cele mai vechi timpuri, istoria ne arat\u0103 c\u0103 bullies au avut trei grupuri \u0163int\u0103 mari, care nu reprezentau pericol pentru nimeni: femeile, gay-ii \u015fi evreii. In short, blegii. Nu te pui cu musulmanii sau cu Mafia, c\u0103 nu \u015ftii c\u00e2nd te treze\u015fti cu explozibil sub ma\u015fin\u0103. Dar femeile, gay-ii \u015fi evreii sunt trei categorii nonviolente, pasiv agresive c\u00e2nd se sup\u0103r\u0103 \u015fi tradi\u0163ional nonconflictuale, de aceea, to\u0163i bully-ii istoriei \u015fi-au g\u0103sit saci de box \u00een ei.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Primul pas este s\u0103 \u00eel \u00eentrebi direct, foarte calm \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 pari intimidat\u0103: Prietene, care e de fapt problema ta? \u015ei c\u00e2nd d\u0103 din col\u0163 \u00een col\u0163, \u00eei enumeri exact ce a f\u0103cut, c\u00e2nd \u015fi cum. Informeaz\u0103-l c\u0103 nu merge a\u015fa \u015fi c\u0103 o s\u0103 iei m\u0103suri.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Al doilea pas este s\u0103 mergi la \u015feful direct, s\u0103 \u00eei ceri \u00een fa\u0163\u0103 ajutorul. Explic\u0103-i tot ce \u0163i se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103, descrie modul \u00een care comportamentul individului te afecteaz\u0103 \u015fi caut\u0103 s\u0103 ob\u0163ii un aliat. Dac\u0103 \u015feful direct nu se bag\u0103, mergi cu o treapt\u0103 mai sus, \u015fi tot a\u015fa.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Dar s\u0103 zicem c\u0103 nimeni, absolut nimeni nu se bag\u0103.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Impune-\u0163i calm \u015fi trateaz\u0103 totul ca pe un joc de strategie.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Se face c\u0103 nu te aude? \u00cel suni pe mobil, chiar de la masa vecin\u0103, \u015fi c\u00e2nd reac\u0163ioneaz\u0103, faci o glum\u0103: Ah, deci nu e\u015fti surd. A\u015f fi putut jura.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Nu livreaz\u0103 partea lui dintr-un proiect comun? O predai pe a ta, as is, \u015fi \u00eei spui superiorlui s\u0103 trag\u0103 ei de muist, c\u0103 e angajatul lor \u015fi e obliga\u0163ia lor s\u0103-l motiveze.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Face comentarii deplasate? Spune-i c\u0103 n-ai auzit bine \u015fi cere-i s\u0103-\u0163i explice ce \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103 zic\u0103, c\u0103 uite, nu transmite foarte clar.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
For\u0163eaz\u0103-l s\u0103-\u0163i cear\u0103 scuze c\u00e2nd gre\u015fe\u015fte \u015fi dac\u0103-\u0163i cere o favoare, refuz\u0103-l sec. “Nu \u00eemi place comportamentul t\u0103u, eu nu m\u0103 pot baza pe tine, prin urmare, nici tu nu te po\u0163i baza pe mine”.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Important: NU le g\u00e2ndi lung \u00eenainte, NU-\u0163i face scenarii, c\u0103 sunt cumplit de neconving\u0103toare \u00een moment \u015fi nu te oftica de momente \u00een care nu l-ai tufut adecvat \u00een gur\u0103. Ai un viitor \u00een fa\u0163a ta s-o faci.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Recapitul\u0103m pa\u015fii:<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
1. Tu, un om vertical \u015fi cu nimic de ascuns, \u00eel \u00eentrebi verde \u00een fa\u0163\u0103 de ce e \u0163\u0103ran \u015fi ce crede c\u0103 ob\u0163ine cu asta pe termen lung.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Sunt nesim\u0163i\u0163i care se intimideaz\u0103 c\u00e2nd sunt lua\u0163i direct \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 ezitare, \u015fi dup\u0103 aceea se regrupeaz\u0103. Sunt nesim\u021bi\u021bi care nu. Dac\u0103 nu…<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
2.\u00a0 VORBE\u015eTI propriu-zis cu superiorii \u015fi le spui problema. Explici \u015fi modurile \u00een care performan\u0163a ta e afectat\u0103 de agarici.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
3. Te reinventezi \u00een nesim\u0163ita 2.0, \u015fi sco\u0163i la iveal\u0103 scorpia necru\u0163\u0103toare, soacra primordial\u0103 care zace \u00een fiecare femeie. \u00cei taxezi verbal, tare, fiecare pas gre\u015fit, \u00eel critici \u00een ochi, \u015fi \u00eel raportezi \u00een scris superiorilor, dar nu pe la spate, ci declarat, \u00een fa\u0163\u0103, \u00eei faci observa\u0163ii t\u0103ioase, dar justificate \u015fi \u00eel reeduci legat de “emotiva care nu se descurc\u0103 \u00een confrunt\u0103ri”.<\/div>\n

F\u0103-l s\u0103-i fie fric\u0103 de gura ta \u015fi atunci, te asigur, o s\u0103 \u00eenve\u0163e s\u0103 nu se pun\u0103 cu nebuna.<\/p>\n

Nu uita! \u0102la emotiv \u015fi cu team\u0103 de confrunt\u0103ri fie moare primul \u00eentr-un film horror, fie se dovede\u015fte c\u0103 e de fapt Batman.<\/p>\n

Sper c\u0103 \u0163i-am fost util\u0103,<\/p>\n

Lorena.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i place acest blog, ai avut vreodat\u0103 inten\u0163ia s\u0103-l sus\u0163ii dar ai tot am\u00e2nat, acum ar fi un moment foarte bun.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

***
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a>.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Ascult\u0103 Jet pe Spotify<\/a><\/strong>, cump\u0103r\u0103 piesa pe iTunes<\/strong><\/a> sau pe Amazon Music<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care mi-o...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15902,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19641","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/postaredactiei.jpg?fit=480%2C360&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19641","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19641"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19641\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19642,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19641\/revisions\/19642"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15902"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19641"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19641"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19641"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}