Acesta este un guest post, scris de un cititor pe nume Cristian Dobre. Domnul respectiv se \u00eenfuriase foarte tare la o replic\u0103 stupid\u0103 a cuiva care afirmase c\u0103 “\u015fi nu \u015ftiu care \u015fi-a b\u0103tut copiii, dar acum au ajuns ingineri \u015fi-i mul\u0163umesc.” Cineva care nu era cititorul meu regulat – evident, cu o astfel de mentalitate – doar \u00eel f\u0103cuse dr\u0103cu\u015forul internetului s\u0103 pice \u00een ziua aia pe pagina mea \u015fi s\u0103 expun\u0103 p\u0103reri despre parenting.<\/p>\n
C\u00e2nd am v\u0103zut enervarea lui Cristian Dobre, un om care comenteaz\u0103 de obicei calm, civilizat \u015fi cu glumi\u0163e sobre, mi-am dat seama c\u0103 e ceva acolo. \u015ei l-am rugat s\u0103-mi scrie un guest post,\u00a0Nu v\u0103 mul\u0163umim.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Acesta e textul.<\/p>\n Am fost crescut \u0219i educat \u00eentr-o familie \u201ctradi\u021bional\u0103\u201d, unde mi se aplicau \u00een mod regulat corec\u021bii izvor\u00e2te din g\u00e2ndirea \u0219i civiliza\u021bia milenar\u0103 a poporului traco-geto-daco-rom\u00e2n gen \u201cunde d\u0103 mama cre\u0219te\u201d, \u201ceu te fac eu te omor\u201d, \u201cmai bine pl\u00e2ngi acum dar \u00eemi vei mul\u021bumi mai t\u00e2rziu\u201d, etc. dac\u0103 am uitat ceva completa\u021bi voi. Apoi ce venea de la \u0219coal\u0103 era bonus: \u201cda\u021bi, tovar\u0103\u0219a (\u00eenv\u0103\u021b\u0103toare\/profesoar\u0103) \u00een el dac\u0103 nu ascult\u0103, pentru c\u0103 v\u0103 dau eu voie\u201d.<\/strong><\/p>\n Am fost elev de mijlocul clasamentului, cu o men\u021biune prin clasa a doua iar \u00een rest mi-am f\u0103cut jobul f\u0103r\u0103 pl\u0103cere \u0219i tragere de inim\u0103.<\/strong><\/p>\n Prima dat\u0103 s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat prin clasa a doua dup\u0103 o \u0219edin\u021b\u0103 cu p\u0103rin\u021bii, \u0219ti\u021bi voi, locul acela unde p\u0103rin\u021bilor li se \u201cumfl\u0103 pipota de m\u00e2ndrie\u201d sau \u201cle crap\u0103 obrazul de ru\u0219ine\u201d, iar elevii sunt \u00eemp\u0103r\u021bi\u021bi \u00eentre buni \u0219i r\u0103i, puturo\u0219i etc. A fost seara mea cu ghinion, pentru c\u0103 luasem note proaste pe la ni\u0219te lucr\u0103ri \u0219i mamei \u201ci-a cr\u0103pat obrazul de ru\u0219ine\u201d, \u00een timp ce altele se f\u0103leau cu copiii lor silitori. \u201c\u0218ti\u021bi, tovar\u0103\u0219a X, c\u0103 el este elev bun, dar este br\u00e2nz\u0103 bun\u0103 \u00een burduf de c\u00e2ine, trebuie stimulat\u201d i-a spus \u00eenv\u0103\u021b\u0103toarea mamei la plecare.<\/strong><\/p>\n Nu am sc\u0103pat de perdaful de rigoare pe drum spre acas\u0103, am intrat \u0219i am fost trimis s\u0103 stau \u00een camera mea \u00een timp ce mama, care era pumped up, d\u0103dea raportul \u201ccapului familiei\u201d, am fost familie tradi\u021bionala \u0219i se respectau ierarhiile. Tata a intrat \u00een camer\u0103, a \u00eenchis u\u0219a, a scos cureaua de la pantaloni \u0219i mi-a spus s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eentind \u00een pat pe burt\u0103 \u201cnu, nu a\u0219a, dai \u0219i chilo\u021bii jos\u201d. Prima lovitur\u0103 a fost ca un cu\u021bit care mi-a despicat sufletul ca s\u0103 fac\u0103 loc acolo fricii, fricii de b\u0103taie. Mai t\u00e2rziu au intrat am\u00e2ndoi la mine ca s\u0103 \u00eemi explice c\u0103 “mai t\u00e2rziu am s\u0103 le mul\u021bumesc”.<\/strong> S\u0103 ne \u00een\u021belegem, asta se \u00eent\u00e2mpla \u0219i altor copii din bloc, ne auzeam prin pere\u021bi cei care erau la primire \u00een seara respectiv\u0103, iar a doua zi ne ar\u0103tam v\u00e2n\u0103t\u0103ile. Al\u021bii erau pu\u0219i s\u0103 doarm\u0103 noaptea pe sc\u0103ri.<\/strong><\/p>\n B\u0103t\u0103ile erau asezonate desigur \u0219i cu exemple motiva\u021bionale, gen \u201cvezi \u021big\u0103ncile alea care m\u0103tur\u0103 pe strad\u0103\u201d, \u00eentre timp una \u00ee\u0219i ridicase fustele, se cr\u0103c\u0103nase \u0219i se p**a din picioare, \u201cam s\u0103 te duc s\u0103 te angajez \u0219i s\u0103 m\u0103turi cu ele\u201d c\u00e2nd eram prin clasa a patra. Sau eram \u00eembr\u0103cat cu haine murdare \u0219i vechi, \u0219i trimis cu ele a doua zi la \u0219coal\u0103. Tunsul zero era freza mea obi\u0219nuit\u0103 de care \u00ee\u0219i amintesc fo\u0219tii colegi \u0219i acum.<\/strong><\/p>\n Bonusul \u00eel primeam de la profesori la \u0219coal\u0103, castane de ne umflau capetele, palme peste urechi \u0219i rigle de lemn peste palme \u00eenso\u021bite de jigniri \u0219i b\u0103t\u0103i de joc.<\/strong><\/p>\n A venit ziua \u00een care am trasat linia peste care nu am permis \u201ccapului familiei\u201d s\u0103 treac\u0103. Intrasem la facultate \u0219i acela\u0219i controlling \u0219i parental bullying mi se serveau p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00eentr-o sear\u0103, c\u00e2nd am g\u0103sit puterea s\u0103 spun NU, s\u0103 ripostez \u0219i s\u0103 scot acel sentiment de fric\u0103. Universitatea, masterul \u0219i doctoratul le-am f\u0103cut cu pl\u0103cere \u0219i bucuria cunoa\u0219terii, note foarte bune \u0219i burse ceea ce mi-a dovedit c\u0103 nu la mine a fost problema. Acel parental bullying mi-a distrus copil\u0103ria \u0219i mi-a c\u0103lcat in picioare personalitatea, de multe ori m-a f\u0103cut s\u0103 m\u0103 simt ca un milog cer\u0219ind s\u0103 fiu iubit, nu b\u0103tut.<\/strong><\/p>\n Peste ani p\u0103rin\u021bii no\u0219tri se \u00eent\u00e2lnesc \u0219i discut\u0103 despre realiz\u0103rile copiilor \u201casta pentru c\u0103 le-am dat b\u0103taie la timp, iar acum ne mul\u021bumesc\u201d.<\/strong><\/p>\n Nu v\u0103 mul\u021bumim! Pentru c\u0103 se putea altfel.<\/strong><\/p>\n Nu, nu v\u0103 mul\u021bumim, dar ne este mil\u0103 de voi pentru c\u0103 a\u021bi \u00eemb\u0103tr\u00e2nit \u0219i nu a\u021bi g\u0103sit momentul sau puterea p\u00e2n\u0103 acum s\u0103 spune\u0163i c\u0103 v\u0103 pare r\u0103u c\u0103 ne-a\u021bi b\u0103tut ca ni\u0219te bestii.<\/strong><\/p>\n Not\u0103 Lorena: Nu le pare r\u0103u. Se crediteaz\u0103 pentru realiz\u0103rile tale \u015fi se laud\u0103 c\u0103 b\u0103taia lor a dat roade. Neironic. Vezi m\u0103m\u0103ile alea care comenteaz\u0103: Indiferent cum s-au purtat, sunt p\u0103rin\u0163ii t\u0103i \u015fi \u00eei respec\u0163i.<\/p>\n Nu, nu v\u0103 mul\u021bumim, pentru c\u0103 ne-a\u021bi schilodit sufletele \u0219i ne-a\u021bi amestecat sentimentele de nici nu \u0219tim dac\u0103 v\u0103 iubim sau v\u0103 ur\u00e2m, dac\u0103 ne este dor de voi sau nu vrem s\u0103 v\u0103 mai vedem.<\/strong><\/p>\n Nu v\u0103 mul\u021bumim!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Acesta este un guest post, scris de un cititor pe nume Cristian Dobre. Domnul respectiv se \u00eenfuriase foarte tare la o replic\u0103 stupid\u0103 a...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":10174,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20195","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/70.jpg?fit=500%2C333&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20195","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20195"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20195\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20197,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20195\/revisions\/20197"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/10174"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20195"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20195"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20195"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nApoi, stimularea a continuat \u0219i \u00een anii urm\u0103tori, tata prefera cureaua pe cur \u0219i zonele adiacente pentru c\u0103 nu se vedeau v\u00e2n\u0103t\u0103ile de sub haine, mama era mai neglijent\u0103, m\u0103 pocnea pe fa\u021b\u0103 p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00eemi umfla buzele, unghii \u00eenfipte prin m\u00e2ini, fa\u021b\u0103, lingurile de lemn \u0219i f\u0103c\u0103le\u021bul erau folosite atunci c\u00e2nd nu vroia s\u0103 \u00ee\u0219i rup\u0103 unghiile.<\/strong><\/p>\n