Te felicit pentru tot ceea ce faci, e\u0219ti o profesionist\u0103 des\u0103v\u00e2r\u0219it\u0103.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00ce\u021bi scriu deoarece simt c\u0103 o s\u0103 explodez. C\u0103 sunt ca o oal\u0103 sub presiune care mai are pu\u021bin \u0219i plezne\u0219te. Iar \u00een camera \u00een care e oala aia, sunt doar eu, m\u0103 poate r\u0103ni cel mai tare doar pe mine.<\/strong><\/p>\n Ca s\u0103 nu o lungesc: ca orice cet\u0103\u021bean, prezint anumite traume. Pe care am \u00eencercat s\u0103 le rezolv la psihoterapie. Prin scris. Prin be\u021bii cu prieteni & povestindu-le de (aproape) cele mai ascunse traume. & Nu a mers, presiunea e tot acolo.<\/strong> A\u0219 apela la prieteni, \u00eens\u0103 m-am s\u0103turat eu s\u0103 m\u0103 aud pl\u00e2ng\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 at\u00e2t.<\/strong> Ce crezi c\u0103 a\u0219 putea s\u0103 fac? M\u0103 simt blocat\u0103, la marginea pr\u0103pastiei.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00ce\u021bi mul\u021bumesc mult \u00een avans,<\/strong> ***<\/p>\n Drag\u0103 X,<\/p>\n O s\u0103-\u021bi spun o p\u0103rere. Poate c\u0103 o s\u0103 \u021bi se par\u0103 un pic jignitoare, dar ia-o a\u0219a. Tu mi-ai cerut un sfat, eu \u021bi-l dau, nu te \u0219tie nimeni sub umbrela anonimatului, deci nu e ca \u0219i cum o jignesc pe doamna Elefteria P\u0103curici din Aduna\u021bii Cop\u0103ceni, strada Principal\u0103 nr. 8 (toate localit\u0103\u021bile astea au c\u00e2te o Strada Principal\u0103) \u0219i dac\u0103 nu-\u021bi place, po\u021bi s\u0103 o ignori.<\/p>\n Nu te cunosc, dar din tonul mailului t\u0103u mi se pare c\u0103 suferi foarte tare de sindromul capului ad\u00e2nc b\u0103gat \u00een c*r. E o expresie american\u0103. Head up one’s ass \u00eenseamn\u0103, pur \u015fi simplu, c\u0103 e\u015fti at\u00e2t de preocupat de dramele tale, c\u0103 nimic altceva din jurul t\u0103u nu mai conteaz\u0103. \u0218i c\u0103 te complaci \u00een ele.<\/p>\n \u0162i-am povestit cum mama, la 30 de ani dup\u0103 divor\u0163, \u00eenc\u0103 \u00eemi poveste\u015fte ce porc a fost taic\u0103-miu? \u015ei da, a fost. Subscriu. Dar for Christ’s sake, ai sc\u0103pat de porc acum 30 de ani. \u00centre timp, bietul porc a ajuns un mo\u015fulic\u0103 stafidit \u015fi extrem de modest, dup\u0103 ce i-a dat via\u0163a mai mult\u0103 mumu dec\u00e2t \u00eei dau eu unui cocalar random care ini\u0163iaz\u0103 apel video pe Instagram f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 ne cunoa\u015ftem.<\/p>\n Cam at\u00e2t de ridicol.<\/p>\n Taic\u0103-miu e vinovat – \u015fi recunoa\u015fte – de cum \u015fi-a tratat nevasta. Partea a doua e c\u0103 nu \u015fi-a mai tratat-o \u00een nici un fel de 30 de ani. Da, ok, e de porc s\u0103 la\u015fi o femeie singur\u0103 s\u0103 creasc\u0103 doi copii \u015fi s\u0103 nu pl\u0103te\u015fti le\u0163caie de pensie alimentar\u0103. Recunoa\u015fte \u015fi asta. Pentru c\u0103 dac\u0103 nu recunoa\u015fte, \u00eel \u00eempxl\u0103i eu p\u00e2n\u0103 recunoa\u015fte.<\/p>\n Ideea e c\u0103 \u015fi eu, \u015fi frati-miu, dup\u0103 ce am f\u0103cut fiecare 18 ani pe persoan\u0103 fizic\u0103, am g\u0103sit prompt joburi, eu m-am tirat la Bucure\u015fti cu facultate, n-am at\u00e2rnat pe capul ei ca o povar\u0103 nici m\u0103car o nanosecund\u0103, cum fac at\u00e2\u0163ia al\u0163i tineri, deci am c\u0103utat s\u0103 repar\u0103m cumva m\u0103car o parte din ipostaza nedreapt\u0103.<\/p>\n Mkaay. Dac\u0103 \u0103la nu o trateaz\u0103 nicicum de at\u00e2ta timp, cine e de vin\u0103 pentru c\u0103 \u00een continuare \u00ee\u015fi proiecteaz\u0103 filme de acum 30 de ani?<\/p>\n Ea.<\/p>\n Ce recomand?<\/p>\n S\u0103-\u0163i asumi c\u0103 suferi de o form\u0103 de masochism, care implic\u0103 pl\u0103cerea de a relua iar \u015fi iar chinurile prin care ai trecut, \u015fi de complexul victimei, a c\u0103rui mentalitate poate fi descris\u0103 pe scurt a\u015fa: “Nu sunt cu nimic responsabil\u0103 de via\u0163a mea de kkt, \u00eei acuz perpetuu pe x, y \u015fi z \u015fi a\u015fa, le pasez lor responsabilitatea \u00een mod foarte convenabil, iar asta m\u0103 scute\u015fte de a g\u0103si solu\u0163ii \u015fi de a m\u0103 \u0163ine de ele”.<\/p>\n Cum ziceam. Tata e direct vinovat c\u0103 a fost un so\u0163 de toat\u0103 jena. Din secunda \u00een care calitatea lui de so\u0163 a luat sf\u00e2r\u015fit, ar fi fost sarcina maic\u0103-mii s\u0103 se reseteze \u015fi s\u0103-\u015fi g\u0103seasc\u0103 noi izvoare de fericire. Nu neap\u0103rat alt b\u0103rbat, dar un hobby, un side job, un cerc de prieteni, orice. Erau anii 90. Alte vecine mergeau \u00een Turcia, cump\u0103rau blugi \u015fi-i vindeau \u00een bloc, maic\u0103-mea st\u0103tea s\u0103 se uite la televizor \u015fi s\u0103 boceasc\u0103 c\u0103 via\u0163a ei e compromis\u0103.<\/p>\n Mi se p\u0103rea \u00eenc\u0103 de atunci c\u0103, \u00een definitiv, e o form\u0103 de lene interioar\u0103. S\u0103 boce\u015fti pe canapea e simplu. S\u0103 scobe\u015fti over and over acelea\u015fi r\u0103ni \u015fi s\u0103 mai storci ni\u015fte s\u00e2nge din ele, apoi s\u0103 dai vina pe porcul misogin \u015fi lipsit de sentimente e simplu. S\u0103 iei autocarul spre Turcia, s\u0103 cau\u0163i blugi faini, s\u0103 \u00eei aduci cu c\u00e2rca acas\u0103, apoi s\u0103 te plimbi pe la vecini s\u0103-i vinzi e deja complicat.<\/p>\n Ce trebuie tu s\u0103 faci? \u00cen fond, nimic. Poate chiar e un feti\u015f bizar s\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i r\u0103scole\u015fti etern traumele \u015fi de ce s\u0103-\u0163i iau pl\u0103cerea asta. Dar uite. E o nou\u0103 zi. Sunt n\u015fpe mii de oferte de munc\u0103 pe bestjobs sau ejobs. Sunt nenum\u0103rate profile \u015fi de b\u0103rba\u0163i, \u015fi de femei (nu \u015ftiu ce preferi) pe Tinder. Sunt o gr\u0103mad\u0103 de cursuri online \u00een n domenii. Sunt at\u00e2tea anim\u0103lu\u0163e de adoptat. E alegerea ta s\u0103 te define\u015fti prin ce po\u0163i face azi, nu prin paradigma Victima lui A, B \u015fi C.<\/p>\n Ai o singur\u0103 via\u0163\u0103. E alegerea ta cum o petreci. Bocind dup\u0103 rahaturi pe care oricum le-ai dep\u0103\u015fit, sau cu privirea \u00eenainte, asum\u00e2ndu-\u0163i prezentul \u015fi c\u0103ut\u00e2nd oportunit\u0103\u0163i de toate tipurile. Sper c\u0103 \u0163i-am fost util\u0103, ***<\/p>\n Dac\u0103 \u0163i-a pl\u0103cut acest articol,\u00a0sus\u0163ine site-ul cu o dona\u0163ie<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/p>\n *** <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Intro: Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. Nu, Gicu, nu sub form\u0103 de sex, stai jos. \u00cen schimb, lu\u0103m o dram\u0103 personal\u0103 pe care mi-o...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":14493,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20795","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/loud-boom.jpg?fit=800%2C638&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20795","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20795"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20795\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20796,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20795\/revisions\/20796"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14493"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20795"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20795"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20795"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nDa, (cred c\u0103) \u0219tiu ce o s\u0103 spui: nu totdeauna te potrive\u0219ti cu psihoterapeutul, trebuie s\u0103 cau\u021bi p\u00e2n\u0103 faci click cu unul. F\u0103cut \u0219i asta. Nu e asta problema, ci faptul c\u0103 am asimilat, din mai multe \u0219edin\u021be, ce ar trebui s\u0103 fac\/cum ar trebui s\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc\/pun problema. Dar nu pot. Prezint o oarecare inteligen\u021b\u0103, nu neap\u0103rat emo\u021bional\u0103, ci strict obiectiv\u0103, \u0219i \u0219tiu ce ar trebui s\u0103 “fac” \u0219i “cum s\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc” pentru a nu sf\u00e2r\u0219i la marginea pr\u0103pastiei iar. Doar c\u0103 nu pot asimila astea. Le \u00een\u021beleg, logic vorbind, dar nu le pot pune \u00een practic\u0103 nicicum.<\/strong>
\nA\u0219a c\u0103 am renun\u021bat la terapie, momentan, fiindc\u0103 simt c\u0103 \u00eemi pierd ore (\u0219i mul\u021bi bani) doar ca s\u0103 aud acelea\u0219i lucruri pe care le \u0219tiu pe de rost, \u00eens\u0103 pe care nu le pot aplica \u00een practic\u0103.<\/strong><\/p>\n
\n& Nu ajut\u0103 neap\u0103rat, am tot f\u0103cut asta, e o desc\u0103rcare doar pe moment.<\/strong><\/p>\n
\nX.<\/strong><\/p>\n
\nAlegerea \u00ee\u0163i apar\u0163ine.<\/p>\n
\nLorena.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\")
<\/a><\/p>\n
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe\u00a0Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe\u00a0Twitter<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u015fi\u00a0Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe\u00a0YouTube<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n