{"id":20966,"date":"2020-12-21T12:04:42","date_gmt":"2020-12-21T09:04:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=20966"},"modified":"2020-12-21T12:17:31","modified_gmt":"2020-12-21T09:17:31","slug":"ce-faci-daca-ai-parinti-homofobi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/ce-faci-daca-ai-parinti-homofobi\/","title":{"rendered":"Ce faci dac\u0103 ai p\u0103rin\u021bi homofobi?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Zilele astea, Antonella g\u0103zduie\u0219te la ea o fat\u0103 trans cu o poveste extrem de trist\u0103. P\u0103rin\u021bii, oameni cu idei tradi\u021bionaliste, au dat-o afar\u0103 din cas\u0103 pentru c\u0103 nu vrea s\u0103 fie b\u0103rbat.<\/p>\n

\u0218i consider\u00e2nd c\u00e2te mesaje cu “s\u0103 nu spui la nimeni” primesc de la tineri din toate culorile curcubeului, realizez c\u0103, de\u015fi oficial legea care contesta identitatea de gen a fost declarat\u0103 neconstitu\u0163ional\u0103, neoficial avem o \u0163ar\u0103 de p\u0103rin\u0163i care \u00ee\u015fi m\u00e2n\u0103 copiii spre ce cred ei c\u0103 e bine, orbi la personalitatea acestora, iar copiii speria\u0163i se ascund ad\u00e2nc \u00een dulap, de teama consecin\u0163elor.<\/p>\n

Drept care, e nevoie s\u0103 scriu acest articol.<\/p>\n

A\u015fadar: ai alt\u0103 orientare sexual\u0103 sau alt\u0103 identitate de gen dec\u00e2t cea de b\u0103rbat sau de femeie. Dar, ghinion, taic\u0103-tu e dac verde \u015fi a votat AUR \u00een speran\u0163a c\u0103 \u0103ia o s\u0103 fac\u0103 obligatorie violen\u0163a domestic\u0103, s\u0103 poat\u0103 da \u00een m\u0103-ta p\u00e2n\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2ne v\u0103duv, iar maic\u0103-ta o arde pe ortodoxie grav\u0103 care o \u00eenva\u0163\u0103 c\u0103 basically femeia e de vin\u0103 pentru orice \u00een general \u015fi c\u0103 abuzul se converte\u015fte \u00een bile albe \u00een lumea de apoi, drept care, se v\u0103ic\u0103re\u0219te toat\u0103 ziua \u0219i cam asta e solu\u021bia ei la orice problem\u0103.<\/p>\n

Sau similar.<\/p>\n

\u00cent\u00e2i \u00ee\u0163i spun ce s\u0103 NU faci.<\/p>\n

Nu \u00eei pui pe un piedestal imaginar, la modul c\u0103, indiferent c\u00e2t sunt de pro\u015fti \u015fi de r\u0103i, sunt p\u0103rin\u0163i \u015fi crucea mea e s\u0103 \u00eei mint frumos toat\u0103 via\u0163a, fie din mil\u0103, fie din frica de puterea castratoare \u015fi paralizant\u0103 pe care o au p\u0103rin\u0163ii cu adev\u0103rat abuzivi.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

P\u0103rin\u0163ii t\u0103i sunt oameni, \u015fi, \u00een calitatea lor de oameni, sunt limita\u0163i ca oricare al\u0163ii. Dac\u0103 nu le po\u0163i comunica real nimic despre tine, c\u0103 ignor\u0103 sau \u0163ip\u0103 peste tine, chiar mai limita\u0163i dec\u00e2t majoritatea. \u015ei \u00een calitatea lor de oameni, va fi nevoie s\u0103 ia not\u0103 despre adev\u0103rul t\u0103u, fie c\u0103 le convine, fie c\u0103 nu.<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103 \u00eei suspectezi c\u0103 te-ar putea da afar\u0103 din cas\u0103, am\u00e2n\u0103 coming out p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i c\u00e2\u015ftigi independen\u0163a material\u0103.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Cine cite\u015fte acest blog de ceva vreme \u015ftie c\u0103 noi suntem fanii banului c\u00e2\u015ftigat prin munca proprie. Banul c\u00e2\u015ftigat prin munca proprie \u00ee\u0163i d\u0103 demnitate. \u00ce\u0163i permite s\u0103 ie\u015fi pe u\u015f\u0103 cu fruntea sus de oriunde. Inclusiv din casa p\u0103rinteasc\u0103, dac\u0103 e cazul.<\/p>\n

Sigur, acum, cu Covid, treaba se complic\u0103, dar \u015fi acum. Am fost s\u0103-mi iau m\u00e2ncare de la Carrefour. Pe u\u015f\u0103: Carrefour angajeaz\u0103! Apoi, m-am dus s\u0103 ridic un produs de la showroomul Emag. Alt\u0103 pancart\u0103: Angaj\u0103m colegi! Se caut\u0103 for\u0163\u0103 de munc\u0103 \u00een continuare peste tot.<\/p>\n

Fii pe picioarele tale, caut\u0103 o chirie ok, \u015fi dup\u0103 ce \u015ftii c\u0103 ai unde s\u0103 fugi, preg\u0103te\u015fte-te de conversa\u0163ia inevitabil\u0103. De ce inevitabil\u0103? Pentru c\u0103 TU AI DREPTUL LA ADEV\u0102RUL \u015eI IDENTITATEA TA, a\u015fa cum dacul verde are dreptul la a lui, \u015fi nu cere permisiune de la nimeni pentru asta. \u015ei e important ca al\u0163ii s\u0103-\u0163i respecte adev\u0103rul \u015fi identitatea, a\u015fa cum o respec\u0163i \u015fi tu pe a lor.<\/p>\n

\u0218i independen\u021ba material\u0103 mai are o caracteristic\u0103, extrem de agreabil\u0103: te face mai self-confident \u0219i mai pu\u021bin \u00eenclinat s\u0103 iei bullshit de la al\u021bii.<\/p>\n

Preg\u0103te\u015fte-te mintal de criz\u0103 \u015fi repet\u0103-\u0163i c\u0103 e\u015fti suficient de puternic s\u0103 treci peste.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mai ales c\u00e2nd p\u0103rin\u0163ii sunt at\u00e2t de drama queen, \u00eenc\u00e2t ai senza\u0163ia c\u0103 e\u015fti la Schimb de mame zi de zi, cu diferen\u0163a c\u0103 maic\u0103-ta nu pleac\u0103 nic\u0103ieri, \u015ftii c\u0103 o s\u0103 urmeze show.<\/p>\n

Dar CINE E\u015eTI TU \u00ceN REALITATE e mai important dec\u00e2t frica de isterii f\u0103r\u0103 rost. Pentru tine, e identitatea ta. Pentru ei e “oloooo, uiuiuuu, ce-a s\u0103-o zic\u0103 vecinele.”<\/p>\n

De ce e important s\u0103 le spui?<\/p>\n

Pentru c\u0103, din cauza t\u0103cerii tale \u015fi a celor ca tine, ei nu \u015ftiu c\u00e2\u0163i dintre voi sunt “altfel”, \u015fi latr\u0103 pe net din ignoran\u0163\u0103.<\/p>\n

D\u0103-le timp.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mai ales pentru creierele extrem de sp\u0103late ale tradi\u0163ionali\u015ftilor care \u015ftiu una \u015fi bun\u0103, c\u0103 eu te-am f\u0103cut \u0219i eu te omor, au nevoie de timp s\u0103 proceseze no\u021biunea c\u0103 nu, copilul nu e plastilin\u0103 din care modelezi ce vrei tu, ci e om de sine st\u0103t\u0103tor \u0219i po\u021bi doar s\u0103-l \u00eenve\u021bi s\u0103 te mint\u0103 \u0219i s\u0103 se mint\u0103 singur, \u00een niciun caz s\u0103-l schimbi cu ceva.<\/p>\n

Nu \u00eencerca s\u0103 extragi cu insisten\u021be acceptarea \u0219i \u00een\u021belegerea. Tu le-ai spus ce era de spus, de aici e treaba lor s\u0103 proceseze sau nu. Las\u0103-i pur \u0219i simplu \u00een pace, s\u0103 deschid\u0103 ei subiectul data viitoare. \u0218i dac\u0103-l deschid din acela\u0219i unghi al ignoran\u021bei \u0219i sp\u0103l\u0103rii pe creier, mai explici o dat\u0103. Nu cedezi, pentru c\u0103 via\u021ba \u0219i adev\u0103rul t\u0103u sunt ale tale, nu ale lor.<\/p>\n

\u0218i \u00een cele din urm\u0103, dac\u0103 ei insist\u0103 cu ale lor, po\u021bi lua decizia, dureroas\u0103 dar necesar\u0103, s\u0103 retragi ambasadele \u0219i s\u0103-\u021bi vezi de via\u021ba ta pur \u0219i simplu. A\u0219a cum ei nu\u00a0 te pot schimba pe tine, nici tu nu-i po\u021bi schimba pe ei. Dac\u0103 bun\u0103voin\u021ba de a se informa \u0219i de a \u00een\u021belege nu exist\u0103, caut\u0103-\u021bi propriul trib, de oameni deschi\u0219i mintal \u0219i emo\u021bional, cu care po\u021bi comunica liber.<\/p>\n

\u0218i important<\/p>\n

Nu l\u0103sa experien\u021ba negativ\u0103 derivat\u0103 din experien\u021ba cu p\u0103rin\u021bii t\u0103i s\u0103 modeleze cine e\u0219ti tu ca om.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Abuzul parental tinde s\u0103 fie una dintre acele chestii care te marcheaz\u0103 pe via\u021b\u0103. Mai ales dac\u0103 se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 la v\u00e2rste la care tinzi s\u0103 crezi c\u0103 \u021bi se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 pentru c\u0103 tu real e\u0219ti un om de calitate inferioar\u0103 \u0219i c\u0103 e normal s\u0103 fii tratat a\u0219a.<\/p>\n

Vestea bun\u0103 e c\u0103 abuzul parental NU are leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu tine, ci cu demonii interiori cu care se lupt\u0103 p\u0103rin\u021bii t\u0103i, cu sl\u0103biciunea \u0219i instabilitatea lor mintal\u0103 pe care o compenseaz\u0103 f\u0103c\u00e2nd excese de autoritarism fa\u021b\u0103 de tine \u0219i cu inadecvarea care \u00eei face s\u0103 se refugieze \u00een teorii conspira\u021bioniste demente, pentru c\u0103 a rezolva probleme cere efort \u0219i responsabilitate, iar a \u00eenvinui pe Satana, flac\u0103ra\u00a0 violet\u0103 sau SRI-ul \u0219i pe \u0218oro\u0219 de ele nu.<\/p>\n

De asemenea, c\u00e2nd te confrun\u021bi cu o situa\u021bie grea, po\u021bi decide dac\u0103 e\u0219ti eroul acelei \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103ri sau victima ei. S\u0103 te complaci \u00een ipostaza de victim\u0103 e mai simplu. Vai, vai, vai, toat\u0103 ziua \u0219i nimic concret s\u0103 schimbi ceva.<\/p>\n

S\u0103 g\u0103se\u0219ti for\u021ba interioar\u0103 de a o lua mereu de la cap\u0103t, pe pagin\u0103 alb\u0103, e dificil, dar e singurul mod \u00een care merit\u0103 s\u0103 tr\u0103ie\u0219ti. Iar dac\u0103 ai nevoie de terapie pentru asta, just do it.<\/p>\n

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Dac\u0103 \u0163i-a pl\u0103cut acest articol,\u00a0sus\u0163ine site-ul cu o dona\u0163ie<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n

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Ascult\u0103 Jet pe\u00a0Spotify<\/a><\/strong>, cump\u0103r\u0103 piesa pe\u00a0iTunes<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0sau pe\u00a0Amazon Music<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n

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Zilele astea, Antonella g\u0103zduie\u0219te la ea o fat\u0103 trans cu o poveste extrem de trist\u0103. P\u0103rin\u021bii, oameni cu idei tradi\u021bionaliste, au dat-o afar\u0103 din...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":20969,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20966","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/man-5355842_640.jpg?fit=640%2C427&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20966","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20966"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20966\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20971,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20966\/revisions\/20971"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20969"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20966"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20966"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20966"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}