{"id":21327,"date":"2021-02-25T13:54:43","date_gmt":"2021-02-25T10:54:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=21327"},"modified":"2021-02-25T13:58:20","modified_gmt":"2021-02-25T10:58:20","slug":"mi-as-dori-o-relatie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/mi-as-dori-o-relatie\/","title":{"rendered":"Po\u0219ta redac\u021biei: Mi-a\u0219 dori o rela\u021bie"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>De Dragobete, po\u0219ta redac\u021biei e instant (sau aproape). Omul d\u0103 un mail pe birou@lorenalupu.com, cu o problem\u0103 ap\u0103s\u0103toare de iubire, \u0219i prime\u0219te pe loc un articol \u00een care \u00eei spunem ce credem.<\/p>\n<p>\u0218i misiva de azi zice a\u0219a:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Drag\u0103 Lorena,<\/strong><\/p>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><strong>Cum s\u0103 nu ajungi \u00een ipostaza de tip\u0103 cu prieteni cu beneficii, c\u00e2nd tu vrei de fapt o rela\u021bie? Prietenii, m\u0103 refer la fete \u0219i b\u0103ie\u021bi lua\u021bi, \u00eemi spun c\u0103 abstinen\u021ba ar trebui s\u0103 m\u0103 ajute s\u0103 \u00eemi reevaluez op\u021biunile \u0219i s\u0103 nu m\u0103 mai ata\u0219ez random dup\u0103 ce fac sex cu c\u00e2te unul. Asta \u0219i aplic acum, dar e al naibii de greu, chiar \u0219i cu avut grij\u0103 de mine \u00eens\u0103mi, dac\u0103 \u00een\u021belegi la ce m\u0103 refer. De asemenea, men\u021bionez c\u0103 nu sunt ur\u00e2t\u0103 cu crengi sau ultima idioat\u0103, deci un de\u0219tept pentru mine ar trebui s\u0103 fie pe undeva.<\/strong><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><strong>Tu ce p\u0103rere ai?<\/strong><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><strong>Merci anticipat!<\/strong><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><strong>X.\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">***<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Drag\u0103 X.,<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">S\u0103 te lini\u015ftesc: Prea pu\u0163in conteaz\u0103 cum ar\u0103\u0163i \u015fi c\u00e2t de de\u015fteapt\u0103 e\u015fti. Lumea asta e plin\u0103 de femei ur\u00e2\u0163ele care au parteneri iubitori \u015fi de fotomodele respinse, deci nu e vorba despre nimic de genul.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Acum, o s\u0103-\u0163i povestesc o nedumerire a mea.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Ce nu \u00een\u021beleg eu din cum e compus mailul: tu vrei o rela\u021bie \u00een general, \u0219i te alegi \u00een general cu ipostaza de prieten\u0103 cu beneficii, sau ai pus ochii pe unul \u0219i \u0103la te trateaz\u0103 ca pe o prieten\u0103 cu beneficii \u0219i tu generalizezi?<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Hai s\u0103 lu\u0103m fiecare caz \u00een parte.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><strong>A) \u021ai s-a pus pata, iar \u0103la vrea sex \u0219i at\u00e2t.\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">E o dinamic\u0103 extrem de toxic\u0103, \u00een care \u0103la, care e 100% deta\u0219at, folose\u0219te \u00eempotriva ta propria ta investi\u021bie emo\u021bional\u0103. Pentru c\u0103 investi\u021bia lui emo\u021bional\u0103 e zero barat.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">\u0218i singurul lucru pe care po\u021bi s\u0103-l faci s\u0103 schimbi aceast\u0103 dinamic\u0103 e s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi asumi c\u0103 e tot ce se poate ob\u021bine \u0219i s\u0103 rupi pur \u0219i simplu rela\u021bia. Definitiv. F\u0103r\u0103 ezit\u0103ri, f\u0103r\u0103 p\u0103reri de r\u0103u, \u0219i renun\u021b\u00e2nd complet la investi\u021bia de p\u00e2n\u0103 acum.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">\u0218i pe viitor, nu mai repeta gre\u0219elile care te-au adus aici in the first place.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><strong>B) Vrei o rela\u021bie \u00een general, \u0219i ajungi \u00een general \u00een ipostaza de prieten\u0103 cu beneficii.\u00a0<\/strong><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Asta se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 pentru c\u0103 dai prea mult prea repede.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Am un exemplu preferat. O fost\u0103 cuno\u0219tin\u021b\u0103 de Facebook. Voia r\u0103u de tot o rela\u021bie. Grav, grav. Cum o scotea unul \u00een ora\u0219, cum a doua zi se trecea pe Facebook ca in a relationship cu \u0103la.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Practic, timeline-ul ei era a\u0219a:<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Luni: Vasilica is\u00a0 in a relationship cu Ion.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Ne iubiiiim, ne ador\u0103\u0103\u0103m, omg.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Mar\u021bi: Vasilica is single.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Status: Nimeni, nimeeeni nu m\u0103 iube\u0219te.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Miercuri: Vasilica loves George. #amor<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Joi: Vasilica is single, depressed and wants to die.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Vineri: Vasilica is at Rendez-Vous Cafe with Marin.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">New love in the air.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Ce f\u0103cea Vasilica gre\u0219it \u0219i \u00eei alunga pe to\u021bi?<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Prea se punea pe sine \u00eens\u0103\u0219i pe o tav\u0103 \u0219i se d\u0103dea cu totul a\u0219a, la primul contact.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">\u0218i oamenii sunt crea\u021bi s\u0103 nu respecte ceea ce primesc foarte u\u0219or.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Evident, c\u00e2nd primeau at\u00e2t de mult la schimb cu mai nimic, b\u0103rba\u021bii respectivi nu \u0219tiau cum s\u0103 fug\u0103. Pentru c\u0103 o femeie care se respect\u0103 nu va proceda niciodat\u0103 a\u0219a. O femeie care se respect\u0103 spune: &#8220;Stai pu\u0163in, s\u0103 ne cunoa\u015ftem mai bine. Nu sunt convins\u0103 c\u0103 tu e\u015fti b\u0103rbatul cu care vreau s\u0103 \u00eemi petrec urm\u0103torii ani de via\u0163\u0103.&#8221;<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Nu cred c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 ascunzi faptul c\u0103 vrei o rela\u0163ie ci, dimpotriv\u0103, s\u0103 \u00eel spui la primul date: &#8220;\u00cemi doresc O RELA\u0162IE. O conexiune emo\u0163ional\u0103 profund\u0103. Vreau un b\u0103rbat care s\u0103 m\u0103 iubeasc\u0103.&#8221;<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Apoi. Trebuie s\u0103 evaluezi realist \u0219ansele de a avea o rela\u021bie cu X, Y \u0219i Z. Pentru c\u0103 un alt mit feminin e c\u0103 o s\u0103 se schimbe pentru tine. Mnup. Ce vezi, aia o s\u0103 ai. E un mincinos notoriu? Nu va deveni fufle\u021bel autentic \u00eentr-o rela\u021bie. E isteric \u0219i gher\u021boi? Nervii \u0103ia o s\u0103-i descarce pe tine. \u00cemb\u00e2rlig\u0103 zece femei deodat\u0103? Salut\u0103-le pe viitoarele tale \u0219ogori\u021be. Etc., etc.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Orienteaz\u0103-te direct spre un om ok, loial \u0219i bun.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Apoi, un lucru care face poten\u021biale rela\u021bii s\u0103 devin\u0103 simple co\u021b\u0103ieli e accentul pe sex mult prea devreme.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Nu te gr\u0103bi s\u0103 sari \u00een pat. Discu\u0163iile cu o prieten\u0103 cu beneficii sunt sexuale. Cele cu o femeie pe care o consideri jum\u0103tatea ta, nu de la \u00eenceput. E perfect ok, chiar dac\u0103 atipic \u00een zilele noastre, s\u0103-i spui unuia exact ce mi-ai scris mie: &#8220;Nu m\u0103 gr\u0103besc s\u0103 fac sex, pentru c\u0103 dac\u0103 fac sex, m\u0103 ata\u015fez. Vreau s\u0103 \u015ftiu \u00eent\u00e2i c\u0103 e serios.&#8221;<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">\u0102la care va lua asta la mi\u015fto, sau care va pleca voia doar co\u0163\u0103ial\u0103 in the first place. \u0102la care TE place cu adev\u0103rat PE TINE o s\u0103 respecte chestia asta \u015fi chiar va aprecia c\u0103 nu te \u00eentinzi ca untul.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Creeaz\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2i conexiunea emo\u0163ional\u0103 \u015fi uman\u0103 pentru ca, \u00een momentul \u00een care ajungi \u00een pat, s\u0103 \u00eensemni mult mai mult dec\u00e2t o pereche de \u0163\u00e2\u0163e \u015fi una de buci.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Ah, \u015fi important. Arat\u0103 interes, c\u0103ldur\u0103, afec\u0163iune, dar NU trage de om. Multe femei pierd b\u0103rba\u0163i nu pentru c\u0103 vor o rela\u0163ie. \u015ei tipii vor o rela\u0163ie. Ci din cauza disper\u0103rii de a-l lega pe \u0103la de gard c\u00e2t mai repede. Mesaje multe, ini\u0163iative multe, pis\u0103logeal\u0103. \u0102la o s\u0103 \u00een\u0163eleag\u0103 c\u0103 a\u015fa o s\u0103 fie \u015fi rela\u0163ia.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">\u015ei o s\u0103 zic\u0103 ok, mul\u0163umim, v\u0103 sun\u0103m noi.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Sper c\u0103 \u0163i-am fost util\u0103,<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">Lorena.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\">\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>Dac\u0103 \u0163i-a pl\u0103cut acest articol,\u00a0<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/paypal.me\/Trollywood\">sus\u0163ine site-ul cu o dona\u0163ie<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/paypal.me\/Trollywood\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-14577 jetpack-lazy-image jetpack-lazy-image--handled\" src=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=768%2C768&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=160%2C160&amp;ssl=1 160w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=320%2C320&amp;ssl=1 320w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=184%2C184&amp;ssl=1 184w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=600%2C600&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=100%2C100&amp;ssl=1 100w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?w=931&amp;ssl=1 931w\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" data-lazy-loaded=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>***<br \/>\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lorenaalmighty\/\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/lorenalupu\">Twitter<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u015fi\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/lorena.lup\/\">Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCCHBtHi6S2GlUFqETH70cjQ\">YouTube<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n<div dir=\"auto\"><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>De Dragobete, po\u0219ta redac\u021biei e instant (sau aproape). Omul d\u0103 un mail pe birou@lorenalupu.com, cu o problem\u0103 ap\u0103s\u0103toare de iubire, \u0219i prime\u0219te pe loc&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":21197,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21327","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/02\/lover-1822498_640.jpg?fit=640%2C416&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21327","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21327"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21327\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21329,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21327\/revisions\/21329"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/21197"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21327"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21327"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21327"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}