{"id":21437,"date":"2021-03-15T11:20:55","date_gmt":"2021-03-15T08:20:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=21437"},"modified":"2021-03-15T11:20:55","modified_gmt":"2021-03-15T08:20:55","slug":"ce-facem-cu-baieteii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/ce-facem-cu-baieteii\/","title":{"rendered":"Ce facem cu b\u0103ie\u0163eii?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ieri, Alin Dinc\u0103 a postat pe wallul lui ni\u015fte print screens ale unei conversa\u0163ii cu un gigel. Gigelul avea o atitudine nespus de toxic\u0103 fa\u0163\u0103 de femei. Mare fan al violului, al lu\u0103rii femeii cu japca, \u015fi a\u015fa mai departe. Postarea a generat sute de comentarii oripilate.<\/p>\n

Pu\u0163in\u0103 lume a b\u0103gat \u00een seam\u0103 mesajul final:<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Pe final o recunoa\u015fte \u015fi gigelul, plusa din top. Probabil, era singurul mod \u00een care ob\u0163inea \u015fi el aten\u0163ie \u015fi conversa\u0163ie de la cineva celebru. Glum\u0103, glum\u0103, daaaar “tu chiar le aju\u0163i f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 ceri nimic \u00een schimb, nu pui m\u00e2na pe ele”?<\/p>\n

Sentimentul c\u0103, \u00eentr-un fel sau altul, femeile acelea datoreaz\u0103 sex oricui catadicse\u015fte s\u0103 le bage \u00een seam\u0103 d\u0103inuie\u015fte dincolo de glum\u0103.<\/p>\n

Iar \u0103sta e UN gigel. UN oarecare. Drama nu e c\u0103 el g\u00e2nde\u015fte a\u015fa. Drama e c\u0103 exact ca el g\u00e2ndesc sute de mii. Sute de mii de b\u0103ie\u0163ei, influen\u0163a\u0163i de ta\u0163i toxici, r\u0103i \u015fi pro\u015fti, de g\u0103\u015fti toxice, rele \u015fi proaste \u015fi de forumuri de internet, care adun\u0103 al\u0163i gigel r\u0103i \u015fi pro\u015fti.<\/p>\n

\u015ei to\u0163i ace\u015fti gigei r\u0103i \u015fi pro\u015fti se \u00eencurajeaz\u0103 activ unul pe altul c\u0103 femeia e doar o bucat\u0103 de carne, \u015fi scopul ei primordial e s\u0103-\u0163i bagi tu virguli\u0163a pleo\u015ftit\u0103 \u00een ea.<\/p>\n

Unii probabil c\u0103 au \u00een\u0163eles deja c\u0103 treaba nu merge a\u015fa. Daaar glumele porcoase de genul sunt aduc\u0103toare de aten\u0163ie. Aten\u0163ie negativ\u0103 de la fete \u015fi femei (singurul mod \u00een care femeile \u00eei bag\u0103 vreodat\u0103 \u00een seam\u0103). \u015ei aten\u0163ie entuziast\u0103 de la al\u0163i gigei la fel de redu\u015fi.<\/p>\n

Ne e clar tuturor c\u0103 reeducarea societ\u0103\u0163ii trebuie s\u0103 pun\u0103 accent \u015eI pe educarea \/ reeeducarea b\u0103ie\u0163eilor.<\/p>\n

E incredibil cum, \u00eentr-o lume plin\u0103 de op\u0163iuni, unde po\u0163i \u00eenv\u0103\u0163a tot ce vrei tu, unde te po\u0163i angaja remote \u00een diverse locuri, unde izvoarele creativit\u0103\u0163ii \u015fi c\u0103ile de a evolua sunt mai accesibile dec\u00e2t oric\u00e2nd, ni\u015fte gigei se rezum\u0103 tot la a s\u00e2c\u00e2i femei. Respectiv, la a \u00eenvinui femei pe care nu le cunosc, \u015fi c\u0103rora nu au nici un motiv obiectiv s\u0103 le pretind\u0103 nimic, de tot ce merge prost \u00een vie\u0163ile lor. Ale gigeilor.<\/p>\n

De parc\u0103 toat\u0103 bun\u0103starea de alt\u0103dat\u0103 a gigelului, succesul b\u0103rbatului patriarhal, ar fi depins de servitudinea \u015fi exploatarea gratuit\u0103 a muncii unei femei sau a mai multora, \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 asta, nu se descurc\u0103 s\u0103 fac\u0103 nimic de unii singuri.<\/p>\n

Ah, dar stai. Chiar a depins, lol. C\u0103 munca domestic\u0103 nu se vede \u0219i nu se simte, atunci c\u00e2nd e bine f\u0103cut\u0103. Se simte doar c\u00e2nd trebuie s-o faci tu, \u0219i te mai \u0219i chinuie sentimentul c\u0103 cineva \u00ee\u021bi datora s-o fac\u0103.<\/p>\n

Degeaba facem empowerment feminin, degeaba le \u00eenv\u0103\u0163\u0103m pe femei s\u0103 nu mai tolereze abuz sau comportament b\u0103d\u0103r\u0103nesc, s\u0103 ias\u0103 din rela\u0163ii degradante \u015fi s\u0103 refuze interac\u0163iuni intruzive \u015fi invazive, dac\u0103 nu c\u0103ut\u0103m s\u0103 reeduc\u0103m \u015fi b\u0103ie\u0163eii.<\/p>\n

S\u0103 \u00eei \u00eenv\u0103\u0163\u0103m c\u0103 nu, corpul feminin nu \u0163i se cuvine, dac\u0103 nu vrea \u015fi femeia.<\/p>\n

C\u0103 nu, femeia nu e obligat\u0103 s\u0103 vrea, doar pentru c\u0103 vrei tu.<\/p>\n

C\u0103 femeia e om de sine st\u0103t\u0103tor, cu priorit\u0103\u0163i \u015fi treburi care poate c\u0103 nu coincid cu ale tale, dar sunt la fel de importante pentru ea, cum sunt ale tale pentru tine.<\/p>\n

C\u0103 e perfect normal \u015fi ok s\u0103 nu fii dorit de persoana X, \u015fi trecem to\u0163i prin asta.<\/p>\n

C\u0103 h\u0103r\u021buirea femeilor nu e un scop \u00een via\u0163\u0103, nu aduce nimic valoros, \u015fi nu te face nici mai b\u0103rbat, nici mai special, nici mai cool. C\u0103 te po\u0163i concentra pe ceea ce vrei s\u0103 realizezi cu via\u0163a ta, \u015fi c\u00e2nd vei deveni cu adev\u0103rat relevant, te vor c\u0103uta ele.<\/p>\n

\u00cen \u00eencheiere, haide\u0163i s\u0103 v\u0103 povestesc cum m-am \u00eemprietenit cu un fost bully al unei foste amice. \u0102la postase public diverse filmule\u0163e personale ale ei, \u0219i ducea o campanie intens\u0103 de shaming. La reexaminare prin prisma experien\u021bei mele ulterioare, tipa era un caracter \u00eendoielnic \u0219i duplicitar, dar nu shamingul e solu\u021bia. Pur \u0219i simplu, rupi rela\u021bia \u0219i \u00ee\u021bi vezi de ale tale.<\/p>\n

Pe atunci, \u00eens\u0103, eram quite close, \u0219i m\u0103 durea s-o v\u0103d t\u00e2r\u00e2t\u0103 la modul \u0103sta.<\/p>\n

Drept care, l-am abordat privat.<\/p>\n

\u00cent\u00e2i, mi-am b\u0103gat p \u00een toat\u0103 familia lui, p\u00e2n\u0103 la maimu\u0163\u0103.<\/p>\n

Dup\u0103 ce s-a convins c\u0103 nu pot fi intimidat\u0103 \u015fi c\u0103 sunt tare pe pozi\u0163ie, l-am \u00eentrebat: B\u0103i, b\u0103iatule. Asta e tot ce vrei tu s\u0103 faci cu via\u0163a ta?<\/p>\n

Adic\u0103??<\/p>\n

Adic\u0103, la 80 de ani, vrei s\u0103 te ui\u0163i \u00eenapoi peste via\u0163a ta, singura ta \u015fans\u0103 la fericire, singura ta \u015fans\u0103 la \u00eemplinire, \u015fi s\u0103 nu te po\u0163i l\u0103uda dec\u00e2t cu faptul c\u0103 ai h\u0103r\u0163uit o femeie? E ceea ce vrei s\u0103 te reprezinte ca om?<\/p>\n

\u0102\u0103\u0103\u0103, nu.<\/p>\n

P\u0103i, m\u0103i, b\u0103iatule, \u00een loc s\u0103 te macine grija c\u0103 nu te iube\u015fte cut\u0103ri\u0163a, nu mai bine investe\u015fti efort \u015fi energie \u00een tine, s\u0103 devii cu adev\u0103rat bun \u00een domeniile la care e\u015fti bun deja? Iar dac\u0103 nu e\u015fti bun la nimic, iat\u0103 \u015fi motivul pentru care nu te iube\u015fte cut\u0103ri\u0163a.<\/p>\n

\u0102\u0103\u0103\u0103, da.<\/p>\n

L-am \u015fi sunat pe Facebook call, am avut o discu\u0163ie ca de la tat\u0103 la fiu. Exact cum b\u0103nuiam, un copil debusolat, c\u0103ruia nu i-a spus nimeni niciodat\u0103 c\u0103 poate face \u015fi altceva \u00een via\u0163\u0103.<\/p>\n

La final, mi-a mul\u0163umit.<\/p>\n

Acum e bine, face o facultate, are o gr\u0103mad\u0103 de preocup\u0103ri interesante \u015fi roiesc gagicile \u00een jurul lui. Pentru c\u0103 eman\u0103 pozitivitate \u015fi \u00eencredere \u00een for\u0163ele proprii. \u015ei la scandalurile de pe net, intr\u0103 periodic s\u0103 m\u0103 apere.<\/p>\n

Eu nu am c\u00e2te dou\u0103 ore de alocat fiec\u0103rui b\u0103ie\u0163el debusolat din social media care h\u0103r\u0163uie\u015fte femei pentru c\u0103 nu i-a spus nimeni c\u0103 poate face ceva mai valoros cu via\u0163a lui.<\/p>\n

Dar \u00eemi e clar c\u0103, dac\u0103 vrem s\u0103 evolu\u0103m ca societate, trebuie s\u0103 insufl\u0103m for\u0163\u0103 \u015fi scop b\u0103ie\u0163eilor. S\u0103 le canaliz\u0103m energia spre ceva important. Dac\u0103-i l\u0103s\u0103m de capul lor, o s\u0103 continue s\u0103 fac\u0103 lucruri toxice f\u0103r\u0103 miz\u0103, doar pentru aten\u021bie. Cum ar fi: s\u0103 trimit\u0103 alte 56 de mesaje private scandalizante, c\u0103 poate-poate storc ni\u015fte aten\u0163ie.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103 v-a pl\u0103cut acest text, pute\u021bi sus\u0163ine activitatea siteului cu o dona\u0163ie.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

***
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe\u00a0Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe\u00a0Twitter<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u015fi\u00a0Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe\u00a0YouTube<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Ascult\u0103 Jet pe\u00a0Spotify<\/a><\/strong>, cump\u0103r\u0103 piesa pe\u00a0iTunes<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0sau pe\u00a0Amazon Music<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ieri, Alin Dinc\u0103 a postat pe wallul lui ni\u015fte print screens ale unei conversa\u0163ii cu un gigel. Gigelul avea o atitudine nespus de toxic\u0103...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9373,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21437","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/FACEPALM.png?fit=800%2C486&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21437","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21437"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21437\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21439,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21437\/revisions\/21439"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9373"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21437"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21437"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21437"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}