{"id":21513,"date":"2021-03-27T11:31:09","date_gmt":"2021-03-27T08:31:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=21513"},"modified":"2021-03-27T11:31:09","modified_gmt":"2021-03-27T08:31:09","slug":"o-cadere-nervoasa","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/o-cadere-nervoasa\/","title":{"rendered":"O c\u0103dere nervoas\u0103"},"content":{"rendered":"

Eram la telefon cu mama. De obicei, sunt politicoas\u0103 \u015fi discu\u0163ia curge mai mult despre problemele \u015fi bolile ei. Dar azi, m-au apucat hodoronc tronc to\u0163i dr\u0103cu\u015forii. Cred c\u0103 de la ideea c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 plimb\u0103m iar o declara\u0163ie. Acolo mi s-a pus capacul.<\/p>\n

-Mam\u0103, nu mai rezist cu nervii. Nu mai rezist, s\u0103-mi bag p*** ad\u00e2nc \u00een to\u0163i mor\u0163ii lor. Nu mai suport g\u00e2ndul c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103-mi completez iar declara\u0163ie \u00een fiecare zi, \u015fi s-o plimb cu mine. S\u0103 dau motivul drumului, dac\u0103 poli\u0163istul \u00ee\u015fi dore\u015fte s\u0103-l afle.<\/p>\n

-P\u0103i, o faci pe mobil, ce mare chestie, a protestat maic\u0103-mea, surprins\u0103 un pic c\u0103 nu e totul despre ea, cum e de obicei.<\/p>\n

-Nu mai pot, turbez, \u00eennebunesc. Nu e de la mobil, e de la ideea c\u0103 iar trebuie s\u0103 dau raport unui gabor unde m\u0103 duc \u015fi ce fac. Eu, care nu dau rapoarte \u00een general. M-am chinuit o s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 cu pi\u015fatul \u0103la de vaccin, f***-le muma \u00een c*** celor care l-au inventat, am crezut c\u0103 mor. Bonus, mi se oprise tusea astmatic\u0103, cu un sac de medicamente, \u015fi dup\u0103 vaccin, o am iar, nou\u0103 \u015fi neatins\u0103, trebuie iar s\u0103 cer cortizon de la doctor \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103n\u00e2nc f\u0103r\u0103 sare, b\u0103ga-mi-a\u015f p*** \u00een ea de via\u0163\u0103. Nu. Mai. Pot. N-am mai avut un eveniment de un secol.<\/p>\n

-F\u0103 un live pe Facebook.<\/p>\n

-S\u0103 m\u0103 p*** \u015fi \u00een Facebook, \u015fi \u00een zuccurile lui, c\u0103 iar am ban pe cont o lun\u0103, doar pentru c\u0103 i-am sugerat fin unuia c\u0103 \u00een loc de creier are un borcan de mur\u0103turi incorect conservate. S\u0103 m\u0103 c*c \u00een social media asta corect\u0103 politic, unde nu po\u0163i spune pro\u015ftilor c\u0103 sunt pro\u015fti, pentru c\u0103 pro\u015ftii sunt ultraofensa\u0163i \u015fi te raporteaz\u0103 imediat, b\u0103ga-mi-a\u015f eu o p*** noduroas\u0103 \u00een mamele lor c***e, care au preferat s\u0103 ia m*** de la camionagii pe bonuri de mas\u0103, \u00een loc s\u0103 pocneasc\u0103 ni\u015fte educa\u0163ie \u00een ei. \u015ei dac\u0103 \u00eemi mai trimite un libidinos mesaj privat cu “Ce faci frumoasa”, m\u0103 jur c\u0103 pl\u0103tesc vr\u0103jitoare doar s\u0103 fac\u0103 blestem pe cancer pe c***ele libidinosului, s\u0103 nu-i mai ard\u0103 de co\u0163\u0103ial\u0103. Trece-le-a\u015f pu\u0163ulicile prin ma\u015fina de tocat, s\u0103 fac mititei din ele \u015fi s\u0103-i pun s\u0103 \u015fi le m\u0103n\u00e2nce. Eu nu mai am publicitate pe blog de dou\u0103 luni \u015fi tu m\u0103 iei cu ce faci frumoasa?? O f*** pe m\u0103-ta ap\u0103sat \u00een g***za ei p\u0103roas\u0103, asta fac!!<\/p>\n

-Aoleu, mam\u0103.<\/p>\n

-De ce nu-\u015fi caut\u0103 to\u0163i \u0103\u015ftia escorte s\u0103 se calmeze cu ele \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 lase \u00een plm \u00een pace!?<\/p>\n

-D\u0103-le block.<\/p>\n

-\u015ei dac\u0103 le dau block, vin al\u0163ii. De ce plm nu apare un Covid pentru c***e?? Unul care s\u0103 duc\u0103 la impoten\u0163\u0103 generalizat\u0103, s\u0103 stea to\u0163i nef*** \u0103\u015ftia pe c***ele lor \u015fi s\u0103 nu mai plictiseasc\u0103 femei pe net? Nu vrem deranj amoros, ce e neclar? Mar\u015f \u00een mor\u0163ii lor!<\/p>\n

-Hai, c\u0103 prea o iei personal.<\/p>\n

-Mam\u0103, nu mai suport, turbez, \u00eennebunesc! De un an \u00eentreg fac tot ce e corect \u015fi tot ce trebuie, port masc\u0103, m\u0103 sp\u0103l pe m\u00e2ini, consum un s\u0103pun solid la dou\u0103 luni numai din sp\u0103lat pe m\u00e2ini, stau acas\u0103 serile, nu ies dec\u00e2t cu munc\u0103, \u015fi doar dac\u0103 e obligatoriu, am pierdut o droaie de bani, \u015fi simt c\u0103 suntem \u00eenapoi la starea de urgen\u0163\u0103 \u015fi declara\u0163ii. M\u0103 \u00een\u0163elegi c\u0103 m\u0103 simt ca \u015fi cum m\u0103 rotesc \u00een cerc, \u00eentr-un labirint care nu are ie\u015fire? M-am s\u0103turat s\u0103 mimez c\u0103 va fi bine. M\u0103 f** \u00een mor\u0163ii lor.<\/p>\n

-Auzi, fata mea, zice maic\u0103-mea, dar te-ai g\u00e2ndit s\u0103 apelezi la un psiholog?<\/p>\n

-Aoleeeu. Dac\u0103 m\u0103 ia cu hai s\u0103 g\u0103sim un echilibru interior, \u00eei rup o m\u00e2n\u0103 \u015fi-l bat cu ea. De un an \u00eemi tot g\u0103sesc echilibru interior. Nu mai am echilibru interior \u015fi nu mai vreau s\u0103 am! M\u0103 f** \u00een familia echilibrului interior!<\/p>\n

Tace pu\u0163in maic\u0103-mea.<\/p>\n

-C\u00e2t mai ai din zilele alea f\u0103r\u0103 b\u0103uturi alcoolice?<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103 v-a pl\u0103cut acest text, pute\u021bi sus\u0163ine activitatea siteului cu o dona\u0163ie.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

***
\nVrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe\u00a0Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe\u00a0Twitter<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u015fi\u00a0Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe\u00a0YouTube<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Ascult\u0103 Jet pe\u00a0Spotify<\/a><\/strong>, cump\u0103r\u0103 piesa pe\u00a0iTunes<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0sau pe\u00a0Amazon Music<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n

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Eram la telefon cu mama. De obicei, sunt politicoas\u0103 \u015fi discu\u0163ia curge mai mult despre problemele \u015fi bolile ei. Dar azi, m-au apucat hodoronc...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15091,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21513","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/angry.jpg?fit=640%2C426&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21513","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21513"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21513\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21514,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21513\/revisions\/21514"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15091"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21513"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21513"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21513"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}