1. Nu participa<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u0218tiu, \u0219tiu, pe to\u021bi ne \u00eengrijoreaz\u0103 b\u00e2rfa, c\u00e2nd ne vizeaz\u0103 pe noi, dar credem orice mizerie ca o turm\u0103 de oi bete \u0219i plimb\u0103m de colo-colo rahatul, atunci c\u00e2nd e vorba de al\u021bii, \u0219i nu vedem dublul standard. E drept, poate am participat \u0219i eu de c\u00e2teva ori \u00een asta, dar de obicei deliberat, \u0219i de obicei viz\u00e2nd oameni care mi-au f\u0103cut r\u0103u \u00eenainte. Dar mul\u021bi oameni o fac pur \u0219i simplu, din pur\u0103 pl\u0103cere, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 le fi gre\u0219it cineva cu ceva, doar pentru c\u0103 a m\u00e2nca kkt \u00ee\u021bi d\u0103 fiori \u0219i frisoane, c\u00e2nd tu te plictise\u0219ti la \u0219coal\u0103 sau la birou. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
C\u0103 na, oamenii care au cu adev\u0103rat foarte mult de munc\u0103 nu au timp de b\u00e2rfe. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u0102sta e argumentul idealist pentru a nu participa. Mai e \u0219i argumentul practic. De multe ori, b\u00e2rfitorul \/ oarea caut\u0103 doar s\u0103 creeze artificial du\u0219m\u0103nii. Vine la tine s\u0103 m\u0103n\u00e2nce kkt despre cutare, tu contribui cu ni\u0219te replici, apoi se duce la numitul cutare, s\u0103-i povesteasc\u0103 ce ai zis tu despre el \/ ea, f\u0103c\u00e2nd s\u0103 par\u0103 c\u0103 a fost ideea ta. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Nu ai nevoie de genul \u0103sta de rahat \u00een via\u021ba ta. C\u00e2nd vine X s\u0103 abereze despre Y, o regul\u0103 bun\u0103 este s\u0103 te \u021bii de sf\u00e2nta treime: Nu e problema mea \/ Cu ce m\u0103 afecteaz\u0103 asta? \/ Poate c\u0103 \u00eel \u00eentreb pe Y dac\u0103 e adev\u0103rat. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ce s\u0103 nu faci deloc: <\/strong>s\u0103 \u00eencepi s\u0103-l persecu\u0163i sau s\u0103-l h\u0103r\u0163uie\u015fti pe Y doar pentru c\u0103 a zis X nu \u015ftiu ce. P\u00e2n\u0103 \u015fi la tribunal func\u0163ioneaz\u0103 prezum\u0163ia de nevinov\u0103\u0163ie, d-ap\u0103i \u00een instan\u0163a moral\u0103 numit\u0103 de fix nimeni intitulat\u0103 \u0163a\u0163ele de la tine de la munc\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n 2. Nu pleca capul <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n E o atitudine comun\u0103 a oamenilor vorbi\u0163i de r\u0103u \u015fi, dac\u0103 se combin\u0103 \u015fi cu copil\u0103rie abuzat\u0103, e u\u015for s\u0103 iei mintal asupra ta negativitatea grupului de cutre \u015fi s\u0103 te compor\u0163i ca \u015fi cum \u0163i-ai cere perpetuu scuze c\u0103 exi\u015fti. <\/p>\n\n\n\n HELL. NO. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Acum, sigur, dac\u0103 i-ai cerut bani \u00eemprumut Vasilic\u0103i \u015fi nu i-ai dat \u00eenapoi, deci b\u00e2rfa se bazeaz\u0103 pe dreptate, repar\u0103-\u0163i fapta, d\u0103-i femeii banii \u015fi cere-\u0163i scuze. Cu c\u00e2t mai mul\u0163i de fa\u0163\u0103, s\u0103 vad\u0103 oamenii c\u0103 nu e\u015fti ca \u00een legende. Cere-\u0163i scuze la modul cel mai sincer, eventual explic\u0103 ce problem\u0103 \u0163i-a blocat cashflow-ul \u015fi promite c\u0103 nu se va mai repeta. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Lumea o s\u0103 zic\u0103: Uite, b\u0103, \u015fi Vasilica asta a f\u0103cut din \u0163\u00e2n\u0163ar arm\u0103sar degeaba \u015fi o s\u0103 \u00eenceap\u0103 s\u0103 te simpatizeze. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Dar de multe ori, lumea te b\u00e2rfe\u015fte f\u0103r\u0103 ca tu s\u0103 fi f\u0103cut propriu-zis ceva. <\/p>\n\n\n\n C\u00e2nd unii m\u0103n\u00e2nc\u0103 kkt nejustificat despre tine, nu e vorba despre ce faci tu, despre cine e\u015fti tu sau despre cum e\u015fti tu, ci de propria lor prostie, tic\u0103lo\u015fie \u015fi nesiguran\u0163\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n N-o s\u0103 vezi niciodat\u0103 un om cu adev\u0103rat valoros, un creator, un mare artist, un mare medic, un om cu adev\u0103rat respectabil plimb\u00e2nd kkt pe la col\u0163uri. E sub demnitatea lor. Plimbatul kktului pe la col\u0163uri e specialitatea limbricilor m\u0103run\u0163i, meschini, par\u015fivi, f\u0103r\u0103 caracter, iar tu o s\u0103-i prive\u015fti pe \u0103\u015ftia drept ca pe nimicurile care sunt de fapt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u015ei, brusc, o s\u0103 consta\u0163i c\u0103 nu te afecteaz\u0103 cu nimic ce spun \u0103ia, a\u015fa cum nu te afecteaz\u0103 b\u00e2z\u00e2itul de musc\u0103, sc\u00e2r\u0163\u00e2itul u\u015fii de la baie (unge totu\u015fi balamalele) sau spamul cu m\u0103rirea penisului. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 3. Ia-te public de b\u00e2rfitor. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Dac\u0103 \u015ftii exact care e sursa primar\u0103 a rahatului, interpeleaz-o direct \u015fi de fa\u0163\u0103 cu oameni: Hei, Vasilico, am auzit c\u0103 ai o problem\u0103 cu mine! <\/p>\n\n\n\n Sigur, nu trebuie s\u0103 fii genul anxios \u015fi panicos, ci s\u0103 ai o doz\u0103 de relaxare \u015fi de ruperempl, dar dac\u0103 o prive\u015fti pe Vasilica drept \u00een ochi, de fa\u0163\u0103 cu grupul, \u015fi o iei a\u015fa, o anihilezi instant, \u015fi pe ea, \u015fi falsa autoritate pe care \u015fi-o crease m\u00e2nc\u00e2nd kkt despre oameni, \u015fi o s\u0103-i faci pe mul\u0163i s\u0103 treac\u0103 instant de partea ta, mai ales c\u0103 Vasilica va avea reac\u0163ii vinovate: fie se va f\u00e2st\u00e2ci, fie va \u00eencepe s\u0103 te jigneasc\u0103 necontrolat. La care tu r\u00e2zi \u015fi zici: Aha. Mai ave\u0163i \u00eentreb\u0103ri, oameni buni? <\/p>\n\n\n\n 4. Sau adreseaz\u0103-te unui mediator. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Sunt situa\u0163ii, cum ar fi \u015fcolile sau birourile, unde un conflict deschis de acest tip este interzis prin regulament \u015fi, de obicei, Vasilicile care \u00ee\u015fi permit acest comportament au pile pe la \u015fefi sau au cump\u0103rat direc\u0163iunea \u015fcolii cu ni\u015fte parfumuri de la Sephora, \u015fi atunci, ri\u015fti ca scandalul s\u0103 fie folosit \u00eempotriva ta. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Te duci frumu\u015fel la persoana care are atribu\u0163ia s\u0103 rezolve situa\u0163ia, dirigintele dac\u0103 e\u015fti la \u015fcoal\u0103, persoana de la HR, dac\u0103 e\u015fti la munc\u0103, \u015fi \u00eei poveste\u015fti situa\u0163ia. La nevoie, s\u0103-i dai un instrument de lucru, faci \u015fi pl\u00e2ngere scris\u0103. P\u00e2n\u0103 la proba contrarie, h\u00e2r\u0163uirea e pedepsit\u0103 de lege, iar b\u00e2rfa \u00eendelungat\u0103 \u015fi toxic\u0103 e o form\u0103 de h\u0103r\u0163uire. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Dac\u0103 oamenii \u0103\u015ftia au autoritate real\u0103, de obicei o s\u0103-l pun\u0103 ei pe b\u00e2rfitor cu botul pe labe. Dac\u0103 n-au, te duci cu o treapt\u0103 mai sus. P\u00e2n\u0103 la director \/ manager. \u015ei dac\u0103 nici \u0103\u015ftia nu fac nimic, \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 h\u0103r\u0163uirea e cu complicitatea lor \u015fi po\u0163i trimite pl\u00e2ngeri la inspectorate \u015fi alte organe de control. Partea bun\u0103 cu pandemia e c\u0103 po\u0163i face pl\u00e2ngere online oriunde, din confortul propriului fotoliu. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 5. Abordeaz\u0103 public situa\u0163ia <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Cum fac eu, c\u00e2nd cineva \u00eencepe s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eemproa\u015fte cu rahat. Dau un status pe Facebook, o postare pe blog sau un video pe YouTube \u00een care clarific treaba, calm \u015fi obiectiv, pentru spectatorii impar\u0163iali. Sigur, exist\u0103 mereu cotarlele biased, care te ur\u0103sc pentru c\u0103 nu vor fi egalii t\u0103i niciodat\u0103, \u015fi \u0103ia o s\u0103 te latre ampulea \u00een continuare, dar pe \u0103ia prive\u015fte-i exact ca pe nimicurile care sunt de fapt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Ai gre\u015fit cuiva? Repari, pe c\u00e2t se poate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n N-ai gre\u015fit nim\u0103nui cu nimic? S\u0103-\u0163i swg\u0103 pwla lung, lent \u015fi cu av\u00e2nt voios de pionier. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Asta dac\u0103 b\u00e2rfa ajunge la mine. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Pentru c\u0103 mai sunt \u015fi b\u00e2rfele care nu ajung niciodat\u0103 la tine, doar circul\u0103 pervers \u00een subteran. \u015ei asta ne duce la: <\/p>\n\n\n\n 6. C\u00e2nd cineva te trateaz\u0103 dubios \u015fi<\/strong> nu \u015ftii de ce<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n C\u0103 a auzit ceva de la cineva, care a auzit la r\u00e2ndul lui ceva de la cineva, de cele mai multe ori o minciun\u0103 ordinar\u0103, amplificat\u0103 prin telefonul f\u0103r\u0103 fir. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u00centrebi, pur \u015fi simplu: <\/p>\n\n\n\n -E totul ok? <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u015fi dac\u0103 nu \u0163i se r\u0103spunde concludent, po\u0163i completa: <\/p>\n\n\n\n -Dac\u0103 ai vreo nel\u0103murire, putem s\u0103 discut\u0103m. \u00centreab\u0103-m\u0103 ce vrei. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Asta face s\u0103 sar\u0103 dopul, \u00een multe cazuri. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Dar dac\u0103 omul continu\u0103 s\u0103 te trateze dubios, probabil c\u0103 e foarte prost, caz \u00een care e mai simplu s\u0103 \u00eentrerupi interac\u0163iunea cu totul \u015fi s\u0103 iei distan\u0163\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u015ei punctul final, care s\u0103 te empower: <\/p>\n\n\n\n 7. Nimeni nu b\u00e2rfe\u015fte oameni insignifian\u0163i sau irelevan\u0163i. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Pentru c\u0103 \u0103ia nu intereseaz\u0103 pe nimeni. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Dac\u0103 cineva a alocat timp \u015fi resurse s\u0103 confec\u0163ioneze o abera\u0163ie despre tine, dac\u0103 cineva e chinuit de fixa\u0163ia de a debita despre tine nonstop \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 TE REMARCI, c\u0103 FACI IMPRESIE \u015fi c\u0103 AI CEVA SPECIAL, CEVA CE NU AU EI, \u015eI DIN CAUZA ASTA NU DORM LINI\u015eTI\u0162I LA NOAPTE. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Ia b\u00e2rfa drept ceea ce e. Un laudatio de la oameni mult prea meschini s\u0103 \u015ftie s\u0103 laude. <\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dac\u0103 v-a pl\u0103cut acest text, sus\u0163ine\u0163i activitatea siteului cu o dona\u0163ie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n *** Azi, avem din nou un articol sus\u021binut de cititori. V\u0103z\u00e2ndu-le pe cele precedente, o fat\u0103 care dore\u0219te s\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 anonim\u0103 mi-a trimis 50 de...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":22143,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-22142","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/gossip.jpg?fit=640%2C447&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22142","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22142"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22142\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":22144,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22142\/revisions\/22144"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/22143"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22142"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22142"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22142"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\")
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Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"