{"id":22992,"date":"2022-03-04T11:06:28","date_gmt":"2022-03-04T08:06:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=22992"},"modified":"2022-03-04T11:06:30","modified_gmt":"2022-03-04T08:06:30","slug":"boom-boom-boom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/boom-boom-boom\/","title":{"rendered":"Boom Boom Boom"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Tot aud \u00een ultima vreme discu\u021bii \u00eengrozite \u0219i mult\u0103 panic\u0103 legat\u0103 de bomba nuclear\u0103 a lui Putin. \u0218i, cel pu\u021bin pe teritoriul Rom\u00e2niei, intuiesc c\u0103 treaba se va desf\u0103\u0219ura a\u0219a: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Vama! Cine sunte\u021bi \u0219i ce transporta\u021bi? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Sunt Vladimir Putin \u0219i aduc bomba. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Tsss. Crede\u021bi c\u0103 merge a\u0219a, domnule? A\u021bi depus dosar cu \u0219in\u0103? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Nu. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-F\u0103r\u0103 dosar cu \u0219in\u0103 nu trece nimic de un birou rom\u00e2nesc!! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Nu pot depune un formular online? Suntem totu\u0219i \u00een 2022. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Pute\u021bi \u00eencerca, dar siteul se \u00eencarc\u0103 greu \u0219i \u00eenc\u0103 func\u021bioneaz\u0103 pe Flash Player. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Bine, ok. Dosar cu \u0219in\u0103 it is. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Bun\u0103 ziua, sunt Vladimir Putin \u0219i aduc bomba. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Ave\u021bi acordul vecinilor? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-P\u0103i vecinii sunt fraieri \u0219i fac din ei ce vreau eu. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Nu conteaz\u0103. Avem nevoie de acordul lor scris, semnat, original \u0219i copie, legalizat la notar. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Oook. M\u0103 duc s\u0103 cer acord. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Bun\u0103 ziua, Vladi… <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Aaaa, domnul cu bomba. Nu v-am v\u0103zut de ceva vreme. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-P\u0103i, vecinul ucrainean e cam recalcitrant \u0219i cel moldovean era mereu beat p***, greu s\u0103 te \u00een\u021belegi cu ei. Dar uite acordul. Acum pot s\u0103… <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-A\u021bi pl\u0103tit taxa de timbru? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-\u0102\u0103\u0103\u0103, pe asta unde o mai pl\u0103tesc? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-La circumscrip\u021bia de care apar\u021bine\u021bi, orar de luni p\u00e2n\u0103 joi \u00eentre 8 \u0219i 12. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Eu apar\u021bin peste tot, sunt mondial ca Nelson. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Ne pare r\u0103u, domnu Pu\u021bin, e vorba de adresa din buletin. Iar dac\u0103 nu sta\u021bi \u00een \u021bar\u0103, avem nevoie de viz\u0103 de lucru \u0219i viz\u0103 de flotant la proprietarul unde \u00eenchiria\u021bi. \u0218i aprobare special\u0103 de la Ministerul Afacerilor Externe, original \u0219i copie legalizat\u0103 la notar. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Da’ de p m\u0103-tii original \u0219i copie legalizat\u0103 la notar n-ai nevoie? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Ceeee?? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Nimic, m\u0103 duc dup\u0103 acte. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Bun\u0103 ziua, sunt Vladimir Putin, am bomba nuclear\u0103 \u0219i am toate actele. Pot s\u0103… <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Nu a\u0219a repede, voinicule. Depui cerere scris\u0103, semnat\u0103 \u0219i le… <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-…Galizat\u0103 la notar. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Exact. Ai \u00eenceput s\u0103 \u00eenve\u021bi. \u00e2<\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Voi, rom\u00e2nii, v\u0103 iubi\u021bi al dracu de tare notarii. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Da, ne place s\u0103 le d\u0103m de lucru. Dar s\u0103 revenim. Depui cerere scris\u0103 \u0219i revenim noi \u00een termen de 45 de zile lucr\u0103toare. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Bag pl \u00een ea bomb\u0103 nuclear\u0103. Mai bine iau o macet\u0103 \u0219i v\u0103 c\u0103s\u0103pesc unul c\u00e2te unul. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Tsss. Pentru asta ai nevoie de permis conform Legii privind regimul armelor \u0219i muni\u021biilor nr. 295 \/ 2004, modificat\u0103 \u00een 2007 \u0219i \u00een 2011, republicat\u0103 \u0219i completat\u0103 \u00een 2014, 2015, 2017, 2018 \u0219i 2019, c\u0103 \u00een 2020 \u0219i 2021 a venit covidul \u0219i n-am mai avut timp \u0219i de ea. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

-B\u0103i, oameni buni. Voi nici nu ave\u021bi nevoie de bomb\u0103 nuclear\u0103. Voi v\u0103 omor\u00e2\u021bi unul pe altul cu birocra\u021bia. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dac\u0103 \u0163i-a pl\u0103cut acest articol, sus\u0163ine site-ul cu o dona\u0163ie<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

***
Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tot aud \u00een ultima vreme discu\u021bii \u00eengrozite \u0219i mult\u0103 panic\u0103 legat\u0103 de bomba nuclear\u0103 a lui Putin. \u0218i, cel pu\u021bin pe teritoriul Rom\u00e2niei, intuiesc...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":14493,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-22992","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/loud-boom.jpg?fit=800%2C638&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22992","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22992"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22992\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":22995,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22992\/revisions\/22995"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14493"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22992"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22992"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22992"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}