{"id":24460,"date":"2023-02-04T09:46:20","date_gmt":"2023-02-04T06:46:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=24460"},"modified":"2023-02-04T09:46:23","modified_gmt":"2023-02-04T06:46:23","slug":"posta-redactiei-cumnatul-s-a-mutat-cu-noi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/posta-redactiei-cumnatul-s-a-mutat-cu-noi\/","title":{"rendered":"Po\u015fta redac\u0163iei: Cumnatul s-a mutat cu noi"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. \u00cen sensul \u00een care el sau ea, sau chiar tu, de ce nu, ne trimi(te)\u021bi problema voastr\u0103 de suflet pe birou@lorenalupu.com. Noi citim, cuget\u0103m \u0219i analiz\u0103m, apoi propunem o solu\u021bie sau d\u0103m o opinie \u00ceNTR-UN ARTICOL PE BLOG.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sau \u00een consulta\u0163ie privat\u0103 remunerat\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Subliniez:&nbsp;<strong>dac\u0103 NU vrei s\u0103 scriu despre, NU-mi trimite o po\u015ft\u0103 a redac\u0163iei cu amendamentul \u201cdar vreau r\u0103spuns privat\u201d<\/strong>, dup\u0103 ce am citit un \u00eentreg roman fluviu. Exist\u0103 dou\u0103 op\u0163iuni: vrei formatul \u0103sta, sau \u00eemi recompensezi timpul. Merci de \u00een\u0163elegere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Scrisorica de azi spune a\u015fa:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Drag\u0103 Loredana, <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(cine e Loredana? &#8211; not\u0103 LORENA)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Sunt \u00eempreun\u0103 cu so\u021bul meu de peste 10 ani, dar dinamica relatiei noastre s-a schimbat in ultimii 3 ani. Am ajuns, printr-o circumstan\u021b\u0103 nefericit\u0103, s\u0103 locuim \u00een cas\u0103 cu fratele s\u0103u single care 35 de ani, e f\u0103r\u0103 \u0219i&#8230;omniprezent. Eu sunt extrem de inhibat\u0103, vigilent\u0103 \u0219i mi-e groaz\u0103 s\u0103 ies din camer\u0103&#8230; pentru c\u0103 acest om nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 nimic pentru mine \u0219i \u00eel simt ca pe un intrus. Casa apar\u021bine atat so\u021bului meu, c\u00e2t si fratelui s\u0103u, so\u021bul meu are vo&#8217; 90%, fratele s\u0103u 10% deoarece cam atat a fost investitia sa in cas\u0103. Eu cu so\u021bul meu ne-am \u00een\u021beles foarte bine, p\u00e2n\u0103 dup\u0103 ce am sf\u00e2r\u0219it to\u021bi trei \u00eentr-o cas\u0103. Eu nu mai am lini\u0219te cu acest om l\u00e2ng\u0103 mine, pur si simplu ma\u0103 simt mereu \u00eencordat\u0103, nervoas\u0103 \u0219i simt c\u0103 nu este firesc.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Problema este c\u0103 so\u021bul meu nu vrea s\u0103 \u00eei propun\u0103 s\u0103 se mute, zice c\u0103 \u00eei e ru\u0219ine \u0219i mil\u0103 de el, c\u0103 nici nu se poate \u00eentre\u021bine singur (nu \u00een\u021beleg de ce nu are job, e s\u0103n\u0103tos din c\u00e2te \u0219tiu eu, joac\u0103 jocuri video toat\u0103 ziua).\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>So\u021bul meu mai spune c\u0103 p\u0103rin\u021bii lor au fost da\u021bi afar\u0103 din case de c\u0103tre p\u0103rin\u021bi pe vremea c\u00e2nd erau copii &#8211; deoarece erau mul\u021bi \u0219i s\u0103raci, \u0219i el \u0219tiind istoria p\u0103rin\u021bilor lor, nu vor s\u0103 se &#8220;dea afar\u0103 din cas\u0103 unul pe altul&#8221;.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Dar eu nu consider c\u0103 &#8220;se dau afar\u0103&#8221;. Eu consider c\u0103 e normal ca cel care nu produce s\u0103 stea pe parcela lui \u0219i in casa lui mai mic\u0103, nu s\u0103 stea u\u0219\u0103 \u00een u\u0219\u0103 cu fratele s\u0103u \u0219i so\u021bia lui. Am propus s\u0103 \u00eel desp\u0103gubim, s\u0103 \u00eei d\u0103m partea lui de bani reprezent\u00e2nd valoarea lui de cas\u0103, dar so\u021bul meu nici nu vrea s\u0103 aud\u0103. \u00cel v\u0103d c\u0103 sufer\u0103, dar m\u0103 \u00eentreb, cu mine, cu noi ca \u0219i cuplu cum r\u0103m\u00e2ne?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>So\u021bul meu spune c\u0103 exagerez, \u0219i din ce mai nefericit\u0103 \u0219i inhibat\u0103 sunt eu, din ce mai mult so\u021bul meu parc\u0103 se apropie suflete\u0219te de fratele s\u0103u \u0219i de familia lui.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Mi se pare c\u0103 ori accept, ori plec. Nu \u00eei va propune nimic fratelui s\u0103u pentru a ne l\u0103sa pe noi \u00een cas\u0103.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Mie mi se face r\u0103u de la stomac (FIZIC) s\u0103 aud aceast\u0103 persoan\u0103 \u00een cas\u0103, pentru c\u0103 \u00eemi simt spa\u021biul invadat.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Merg \u0219i la psiholog. Am 33 de ani, \u00eel iubesc pe so\u021bul meu, dar starea mea ne altereaz\u0103 rela\u021bia, eu nici s\u0103 dorm nu mai pot.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>A\u0219 vrea s\u0103 vorbeasc\u0103 b\u0103rb\u0103te\u0219te cu fratele lui, c\u0103ci eu sunt dispus\u0103 s\u0103 fac un \u00eemprumut bancar s\u0103 \u00eei dau, s\u0103 plece. Dar so\u021bul nu vrea banca deoarece este dob\u00e2nda prea mare.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Eu m\u0103 pot vedea cu acest om in weekenduri, ca familia, dar 24 din 24 de ore u\u0219\u0103 \u00een us\u0103 cu el este groaznic. \u0218i \u0219tiu cumva \u00een sufletul meu c\u0103 el aici va r\u0103m\u00e2ne &#8211; plus c\u0103 este favoritul familiei intr-un fel deoarece el este, deschid citatul:\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u00a0<strong>&#8220;s\u0103racul de el, c\u0103 e vai de el, d\u0103-i pace s\u0103racul c\u0103 nici de lucru nu are, m\u0103car o fat\u0103 dac\u0103 ar sta cu el&#8221;.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Am \u00eencheiat citatul mamei lui.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>M\u0103 doare g\u00e2ndul s\u0103 ma mut \u00een chirie cu so\u021bul, noi am lucrat aici la casa mult, mai ales so\u021bul meu in primul rand. Parc\u0103 nu imi vine sa cred c\u00e2t de tolerant este so\u021bul meu \u0219i nu i se pare anormal. El zice c\u0103 &#8220;suntem o familie&#8221; \u0219i s\u0103 nu il pun s\u0103 \u00ee\u0219i renege familia. Dar eu nu \u00eel pun s\u0103 fac\u0103 asta, dar m-a\u0219 a\u0219tepta ca eu, so\u021bia lui si viitoarea mam\u0103 a copiilor lui (teoretic), s\u0103 putem fim intimi \u00een cuibul nostru.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>So\u021bul consider\u0103 c\u0103 dormitorul e cuibul, si deci avem cuib, nu toat\u0103 casa e cuibul.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Noi am tr\u0103it c\u00e2\u021biva ani singuri \u015fi a fost minunat, dar am zis s\u0103 ne retragem la casa noastr\u0103 ca a fost destul\u0103 vacan\u021b\u0103 \u0219i chirie c\u00e2\u021biva ani. Nu m-am g\u00e2ndit nici eu, nici el c\u00e2 fratele s\u0103u va veni aici.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Mi se fr\u00e2nge inima, dar nu mai am lini\u0219te \u0219i nu \u00een\u021beleg cum so\u021bul meu poate fi at\u00e2t de moale. Eu m\u0103 simt prost s\u0103 \u00eel presez pe subiect, dar el vede c\u00e2t suf\u0103r \u0219i mi-a zis s\u0103 &#8220;m\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc bine ce vreau&#8221; c\u0103ci nu vrea ca eu s\u0103 mai suf\u0103r. M\u0103 doare inima s\u0103 plec\u0103m \u00een chirie din cauza asta, dup\u0103 10 ani \u00eempreun\u0103, eu \u0219i el ne g\u00e2ndeam s\u0103 prindem r\u0103d\u0103cini la casa noastr\u0103.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>M\u0103 fr\u00e2ng c\u0103ci m\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc s\u0103 \u00eel p\u0103r\u0103sesc. Oare exagerez? Eu nu sunt genul s\u0103 fiu singur\u0103, \u00eemi place \u00een rela\u021bie \u0219i s\u0103 am un b\u0103rbat aproape.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Atunci c\u00e2nd \u00eemi bubuie capul de tensiune, recunosc c\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eentreb; oare exist\u0103 iubire dup\u0103 33 de ani? Oare m\u0103 mai g\u0103sesc cu cineva s\u0103 m\u0103 potrivesc \u00een vorb\u0103 \u0219i \u00een port, \u00een suflet, \u00een sex, \u00een nesex, \u00een finan\u021be, \u00een valori, \u00een m\u00e2ncare? So\u021bul meu nu bea, nu are vicii, e curat, \u00eengrijit, frumos, respectuos, de\u0219tept, bun \u0219i prezentabil. Dar nu m\u0103 mai pot bucura de el cu fratele s\u0103u l\u00e2ng\u0103 noi &#8211; care e foarte diferit fa\u021b\u0103 de el. Simt c\u0103 \u00eel tr\u0103dez pe so\u021bul meu c\u0103 m\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc la asta, la o eventual\u0103 desp\u0103r\u021bire, dar nu mai suport situa\u021bia, simt c\u0103 ajung la cap\u0103tul puterilor.Nu a\u0219a mi-am imaginat c\u0103 va evolua dinamica noastr\u0103.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>A\u0219a c\u0103 da, \u00eencep s\u0103 am fantezii \u00een afara rela\u021biei c\u0103ci m\u0103 cuprinde neputin\u021ba \u0219i o depresie \u00eengrozitoare. Nu \u00eemi e ru\u0219ine s\u0103 spun c\u0103 \u00eemi este team\u0103 de singur\u0103tate \u0219i vreau s\u0103 tr\u0103iesc \u00een cuplu, a\u0219a \u00eemi place mie &#8211; cu cineva al\u0103turi de care s\u0103 existe pace \u0219i lini\u0219te. Dar \u00eemi este groaz\u0103 s\u0103 ies, dup\u0103 10 ani de cuplu, &#8220;pe pia\u021b\u0103&#8221;, deoarece da, m\u0103 tem de e\u0219ec. \u0218i cumva, \u00eemi este \u0219i sil\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc c\u0103 pune m\u00e2na pe mine &#8220;un nepotrivit&#8221;. Exagerez? Identific b\u0103rba\u021bii sim\u021bi\u021bi c\u00e2t de c\u00e2t bine, dar da, nu sunt mana omida p\u00e2n\u0103 la urm\u0103. S\u0103 cuno\u0219ti un om dureaz\u0103.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>So\u021bul meu \u00eenc\u0103 munce\u0219te activ la cas\u0103, \u00eemi face acum un dormitor la etaj c\u0103 s\u0103 nu mai fiu at\u00e2t de aproape de fratele s\u0103u. At\u00e2t de frumoas\u0103 este camera nou\u0103, o facem \u00eempreun\u0103 \u0219i mor de drag c\u00e2t de bine ne \u00een\u021belegem \u0219i pe design \u0219i tot.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Dar c\u00e2nd m\u0103 bucur mai tare, \u00eemi vine s\u0103 \u0219i pl\u00e2ng pentru c\u0103 de\u0219i face aceast\u0103 camer\u0103 la etaj, fratele s\u0103u este TOT AICI \u00ceN CAS\u0102, iar pe mine \u00een continuare se ridic\u0103 p\u0103rul la g\u00e2ndul c\u0103 dau ochii cu el pentru urm\u0103torii 100 de ani c\u00e2nd ies din baie, c\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2lnesc cu el la buc\u0103t\u0103rie, c\u0103 poate va avea \u0219i el femeie \u0219i poate chiar copii aici &#8211; \u00een viitor.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Simt c\u0103 am o bipolaritate de moment, c\u0103ci m\u0103 bucur de so\u021b, \u0219i \u00een acela\u0219i timp sunt furioas\u0103 pe el c\u0103ci nu discut\u0103 cu fratele s\u0103u pe tema reloc\u0103rii. Acesta nu este &#8220;dat afar\u0103&#8221;, este vorbit omene\u0219te.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Familia mea extins\u0103 lucreaz\u0103 \u00een avocatur\u0103, mie aceste discu\u021bii mi se par normale, iar faptul c\u0103 so\u021bul meu \u0219i familia lui se ascund dup\u0103 deget pe aceste teme, \u00eemi d\u0103 tensiune, mi se pare o copil\u0103rie \u0219i o t\u00e2mpenie c\u0103ci trece via\u021ba aiurea \u0219i noi t\u0103cem bubu\u021boi ca s\u0103 nu sup\u0103r\u0103m pe unu \u0219i pe altul.<\/strong>\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Ce p\u0103rere ai, iar voi, dragi cititori, ce p\u0103rere ave\u021bi? Exagerez eu? Ori schimb\u0103 el tab\u0103ra sufleteasc\u0103 \u0219i se mut\u0103 la fratele lui \u0219i la familia lui? Eu asta simt, ce altceva s\u0103 simt dac\u0103 el nu deschide subiectul cu ei\/el? Este at\u00e2t de nefiresc s\u0103 \u00eei pretind spa\u021biul nostru personal? (\u0219i s\u0103-l desp\u0103gubim pe fratele s\u0103u?). Este timpul s\u0103 plec din rela\u021bie? Este mult\u0103 tensiune \u0219i \u00eemi fac r\u0103u at\u00e2t mie, c\u00e2t \u0219i so\u021bului deoarece el este foarte trist c\u00e2nd m\u0103 vede \u00een aceast\u0103 depresie \u0219i crispare pe care nu le mai pot ascunde. Dar de\u0219i m\u0103 vede astfel, nu face niciun pas c\u0103tre fratele s\u0103u pentru a discuta o eventual\u0103 mutare, \u00een schimb, imi zice mie &#8220;s\u0103 m\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc bine ce vreau&#8221;.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Eu cu so\u021bul o ducem bine financiar, muncim am\u00e2ndoi, dar nu at\u00e2t de bine \u00eenc\u00e2t s\u0103 putem cump\u0103ra o nou\u0103 proprietate (fie pt noi, fie pt fratele s\u0103u). Dac\u0103 mi-a\u0219 permite, ACUM a\u0219 lua una. Dar cumva tot m-ar r\u00e2c\u00e2i pe inima\u2026de ce nu-mi \u021bine sau nu NE \u021bine partea, nou\u0103 ca \u0219i cuplu. Nici m\u0103car nu-i propune, nu-l \u00eentreab\u0103 dac\u0103 ar vrea, cu ajutorul nostru, s\u0103 se mute. M\u0103 \u00eentreb uneori dac\u0103 so\u021bul meu nu cumva a evoluat s\u0103 stea cu mine din convenien\u021b\u0103, adic\u0103 dac\u0103 vrea ca eu s\u0103-i fiu bagaj &#8211; bine, dac\u0103 nu, pot s\u0103 plec. M\u0103 \u00eencearc\u0103 aceast\u0103 senza\u021bie uneori, c\u0103 ori stau unde \u0219i cum m\u0103 pune, ori\u2026pot alege s\u0103 p\u0103r\u0103sesc incinta.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>F\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 mai intru-n detalii spun c\u0103 so\u021bul meu e &#8220;destul de confident c\u0103 in vo&#8217; doi ani ne vom putea lua o cas\u0103 nou\u0103, ca atunci va putea el financiar&#8221;, dar nu poate s\u0103 promit\u0103 asta c\u0103ci nu se \u0219tie cum evolueaz\u0103 jobul lui.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>S\u0103 mai stau doi ani pentru o &#8220;posibilitate&#8221;? Mi se pare c\u0103 m\u0103 pierd pe mine \u00een a\u0219teptarea asta, c\u0103 m\u0103 fr\u00e2ng. Iar s\u0103n\u0103tatea mea mental\u0103 e sub\u021bire ca frunza.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Plec? Stau? Ce fac? Ce facem? Ce-a\u021bi face?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>X.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>***<br>Drag\u0103 X., <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Eu te \u00een\u0163eleg. Nici eu nu suport s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2lnesc cu intru\u015fi \u00een buc\u0103t\u0103rie, baie \u015fi a\u015fa mai departe, de aceea locuiesc singur\u0103 \u00eentr-o garsonier\u0103 \u00eenchiriat\u0103. E forma de via\u0163\u0103 care se potrive\u015fte cel mai bine cu cine suntem noi, \u015fi cred cu t\u0103rie c\u0103 nu avem de ce s\u0103 ne cerem scuze pentru cine suntem \u015fi nici s\u0103 ne justific\u0103m prea mult. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u00cen\u0163eleg, mai departe, c\u00e2t te poate irita o povar\u0103 masculin\u0103 de 35 de ani, gamer \u00eenr\u0103it de diminea\u0163a p\u00e2n\u0103 seara, care nu d\u0103 un ban \u00een cas\u0103, dar \u00ee\u0163i bea toat\u0103 cafeaua \u015fi-\u0163i fumeaz\u0103 toate \u0163ig\u0103rile, \u015fi tot tu trebuie s\u0103 ie\u015fi la Mega s\u0103 mai faci aprovizionarea o dat\u0103. Been there, done that, never again. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ceea ce tu nu \u00een\u0163elegi, \u00eens\u0103, e leg\u0103tura fratern\u0103 dintre so\u0163ul t\u0103u \u015fi fratele lui. So\u0163ul t\u0103u nu simte ca tine, el nu vede o problem\u0103 \u00een faptul c\u0103 fratele e cu voi, dimpotriv\u0103, prefer\u0103 s\u0103-l aib\u0103 sub monitorizare direct\u0103, pentru c\u0103 a\u015fa, ratatul nu creeaz\u0103 alte probleme mai dificil de rezolvat, gen o chirie undeva \u015fi restan\u0163e de sute de milioane de lei. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Tu g\u00e2nde\u015fti doar pentru tine, el g\u00e2nde\u015fte din punctul de vedere al \u00eentregii familii, pentru ei ratatul e o problem\u0103 \u015fi, \u00eempreun\u0103, au decis care e cea mai ieftin\u0103 modalitate de a rezolva problema. \u00cel \u0163ii acas\u0103 la tine,   \u00eei cumperi tu m\u00e2ncarea \u015fi-l \u00eentre\u0163ii, \u015fi m\u0103car a\u015fa, nu se drogheaz\u0103, nu face t\u00e2mpenii majore \u015fi nu ne creeaz\u0103 datorii \u015fi obliga\u0163ii dracu&#8217; \u015ftie pe unde. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So\u0163ul t\u0103u nu e moale. Ca dovad\u0103 c\u0103 are ini\u0163iativa s\u0103 te mute pe tine la etaj, s\u0103-\u0163i fac\u0103 dormitor acolo, respectiv s\u0103-\u0163i spun\u0103 \u00een fa\u0163\u0103 s\u0103 te g\u00e2nde\u015fti ce vrei s\u0103 faci. \u00ce\u0163i traduc eu ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103 te g\u00e2nde\u015fti ce vrei s\u0103 faci? \u00censeamn\u0103 c\u0103 prefer\u0103 s\u0103 renun\u0163e la tine, dec\u00e2t la obliga\u0163ia dat\u0103 de p\u0103rin\u0163i de a-i purta de grij\u0103 loserului. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ce trebuie tu s\u0103 faci e s\u0103-\u0163i asumi lucid c\u0103 timpurile frumoase \u00een doi au trecut, iar pe so\u0163ul t\u0103u nu-l intereseaz\u0103 nici c\u00e2t negru sub unghie s\u0103 le aduc\u0103 \u00eenapoi. Prin urmare, \u015fterge cu buretele partea asta, \u015fi evalueaz\u0103-\u0163i lucid op\u0163iunile prezente. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>A) Te mu\u0163i la etaj, ceri s\u0103-\u0163i fac\u0103 \u015fi o mic\u0103 buc\u0103t\u0103rie \u015fi baie la etaj, te \u00eenchizi acolo \u015fi nu te mai intereseaz\u0103 parterul, e problema lor. \u015ei exprimi asta foarte clar, inclusiv de fa\u0163\u0103 cu loserul, pentru c\u0103 polite\u0163ea ardeleneasc\u0103 e un mare defect care ne trage tot pe noi \u00een jos, l\u0103s\u00e2ndu-ne prad\u0103 nesim\u0163irii celor care nu citesc aluzii subtile, de aceea, exist\u0103 \u015fansa ca loserul s\u0103 nici nu \u015ftie c\u0103 e \u00een plus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>B) Te despar\u0163i, dar tu nu vrei asta, cum ai spus; \u00eenc\u0103 \u00eel iube\u015fti pe so\u0163ul t\u0103u \u015fi nu \u00ee\u0163i dore\u015fti pe altcineva. De\u015fi, sincer, dac\u0103 acumulezi frustr\u0103ri legate de ratat, \u00een doi ani o s\u0103 ajungi s\u0103-l ur\u0103\u015fti cu sete, pentru tot ce ai expus \u00een acest mail. Nu, \u00een doi ani nu ve\u0163i cump\u0103ra cas\u0103 \u00een alt\u0103 parte, \u015ftii \u015fi tu asta. Aia e casa voastr\u0103 \u015fi \u00eel \u0163ine\u0163i pe loser, pentru c\u0103 e rezolvarea convenabil\u0103, iar din punctul de vedere al familiei, problema e\u015fti tu, nu el. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>C) O variant\u0103 la care nu te-ai g\u00e2ndit, dar e o rezolvare de tip \u00eemp\u0103cat \u015fi capra \u015fi varza, e s\u0103-i spui so\u0163ului t\u0103u c\u0103 nu mai vrei s\u0103 tr\u0103ie\u015fti nici o zi \u00een plus cu ratatul sub acela\u015fi acoperi\u015f, c\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i face r\u0103u fizic, \u015fi te vei muta tu \u00eentr-o garsonier\u0103 \u00een ora\u015f, temporar, p\u00e2n\u0103-l rezolv\u0103 pe loser. Nu e un divor\u0163. E binevenit s\u0103 vin\u0103 s\u0103 te vad\u0103 c\u00e2nd vrea. Dar tu vrei lini\u015fte \u015fi alegi lini\u015ftea p\u00e2n\u0103 la noi m\u0103suri. \u00ce\u0163i alegi o garsonier\u0103 comod\u0103, te mu\u0163i acolo \u015fi a\u015ftep\u0163i. A\u015fa vei avea \u015fi rela\u0163ia cu el mai departe, \u015fi distan\u0163are fa\u0163\u0103 de ratat, \u015fi a\u015fa vei crea o presiune real\u0103 s\u0103 se \u00eent\u00e2mple ceva. Te previn, exist\u0103 riscul ca acest ceva s\u0103 fie divor\u0163ul de tine, dar m\u0103car scapi de animal. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ce a\u015f face eu, odat\u0103 mutat\u0103 \u00een garsonier\u0103, ar fi s\u0103 m\u0103 dau un pic dificil de g\u0103sit, s\u0103 fie clar c\u0103 e o pedeaps\u0103 pentru c\u0103 mi-a b\u0103gat pe g\u00e2t o gioars\u0103 de om f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 consulte \u015fi c\u0103 nu \u0163ine cont de nevoia mea de lini\u015fte. Dar hey, eu sunt bitchy din na\u015ftere. Tu po\u0163i pur \u015fi simplu s\u0103 te mu\u0163i, iar dac\u0103 vrea s\u0103 te vad\u0103, s\u0103 vin\u0103 \u00een vizit\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>E posibil ca aceast\u0103 distan\u0163are s\u0103 alunge rutina din rela\u0163ie \u015fi s\u0103-l ajute s\u0103 \u00een\u0163eleag\u0103 c\u0103 nu e\u015fti c\u00e2\u015ftigat\u0103 la belciuge, \u015fi c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 te sim\u0163i bine \u015fi tu acas\u0103, nu doar el \u015fi ai lui. Sau e posibil ca, odat\u0103 plecat\u0103, s\u0103 \u00ee\u015fi dea seama c\u0103 \u00eei place via\u0163a de burlac. E o decizie riscant\u0103 pentru rela\u0163ie, dar totodat\u0103 una \u00een care \u00ee\u0163i reg\u0103se\u015fti echilibrul \u015fi ie\u015fi din cercul vicios al toxicit\u0103\u0163ii familiale: cel \u00een care tu repro\u015fezi ceva concret, iar b\u0103rbatul te acuz\u0103 tot pe tine c\u0103 te repe\u0163i \u015fi e\u015fti cic\u0103litoare, \u00ceN TIMP CE nu face nimic s\u0103 rezolve problema expus\u0103 de tine. Fiindc\u0103, pentru el, nu e o problem\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sper c\u0103 \u0163i-am oferit o solu\u0163ie c\u00e2t de c\u00e2t aplicabil\u0103. \u015ei nu, c\u00e2t timp nu iei o m\u0103sur\u0103 de acest tip, ratatul nu pleac\u0103 nic\u0103ieri \u015fi nu prea ai ce face \u00een privin\u0163a asta, regret s\u0103 \u0163i-o spun. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Cu prietenie, <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Lorena (NU Loredana) <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Learn my name right, bitchez! <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Acest site \u00ee\u015fi poate continua activitatea doar cu sus\u0163inerea cititorilor.&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.paypal.com\/paypalme\/Trollywood\"><strong>Aici<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><a href=\"http:\/\/paypal.me\/Trollywood\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-14577\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=768%2C768&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=160%2C160&amp;ssl=1 160w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=320%2C320&amp;ssl=1 320w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=184%2C184&amp;ssl=1 184w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=600%2C600&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=100%2C100&amp;ssl=1 100w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?w=931&amp;ssl=1 931w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lorenaalmighty\/\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/lorenalupu\">Twitter<\/a><\/strong>&nbsp;\u015fi&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/lorena.lup\/\">Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCCHBtHi6S2GlUFqETH70cjQ\">YouTube<\/a><\/strong>&nbsp;\u015fi pe<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lorena.lupu\">&nbsp;Tiktok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. \u00cen sensul \u00een care el sau ea, sau chiar tu, de ce nu, ne trimi(te)\u021bi problema voastr\u0103 de suflet&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":24463,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24460","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/02\/flowers.jpg?fit=640%2C427&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24460","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24460"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24460\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":24465,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24460\/revisions\/24465"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/24463"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24460"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24460"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24460"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}