Salut! Ostap Bender. Lorena \u00eei plecat\u0103 \u00een Costa Rica s\u0103 fac\u0103 un interviu cu crocodilii a\u0219a c\u0103 profit \u0219i scriu nesupravegeat. \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n
Pe vremea c\u00e2nd eram io \u00een liceu nu erau telefoane mobile asa c\u0103 invita\u021biile la bere( mai mult vin, \u00een perioada aia) se f\u0103ceau prin telefonul fix. Ceva de genul :<\/em><\/p>\n – Alo, familia Bender? S\u0103r\u00eem\u00eena, \t\t\tOstap i-acas?<\/p>\n ………………………………………………………………<\/p>\n – Ostape, vii la o bere?<\/p>\n – Ok, ai reu\u0219it sa ma convingi.<\/p>\n De multe ori raspundeau t\u0103ticii \u0219i cum noi b\u0103ie\u021bii eram \u00een perioada c\u00e2nd ne ingro\u0219am vocile \u0219i penisurile, se produceau confuzii. C\u00e2teva cazuri de convorbiri devenite clasice:<\/em><\/p>\n 1.Pulete 1: – Alo, ce faci, b\u0103i \tpul\u0103, nu vii-n ora\u0219?<\/p>\n T\u0103tic : – Stai s-o \u00eentreb pe \tnevasta-mea.<\/p>\n 2. Pulete 2: – Ce faci, b\u0103 pul\u0103?<\/p>\n T\u0103tic : – Stai c\u0103-l chem pe fiu-meu acum. B\u0103, pul\u0103, hai la telefon!<\/p>\n 3. Pulete 3: – Salut, be\u021bivule! Ie\u0219im la beri?<\/p>\n T\u0103tic : – Hhhhm, hhhm(\u00ee\u0219i drege vocea<\/em>). Be\u021bivu’ nu-i acas\u0103.<\/p>\n 4. Pulete 4: – Ce faci, veveri\u021b\u0103 mic\u0103?(veveri\u021ba mic\u0103 avea 120 de kile)<\/em><\/p>\n T\u0103tic : – M\u0103n\u00e2nc nuci!.<\/p>\n Inchei cu sosirea la u\u0219a apartamentului familiei Bender a puletelui nr.5:<\/em><\/p>\n – Bun\u0103 ziua, Ostap ii pe-acas\u0103?<\/p>\n – O murit, zice Bender senior \u0219i \t\t\t\to lacrim\u0103 mare \u0219i grea de vin cade cu zgomot pe pragul u\u0219ii.<\/p>\n \u00cen ziua aia o ma\u0219ina imi lovise c\u00e2inele \u0219i ga\u0219ca o b\u0103ut c\u00e2teva beri \u00een memoria mea p\u00e2n\u0103 s\u0103 ajung io la c\u00e2rcium\u0103. A doua zi l-am injurat pe profu de fizic\u0103.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Salut! Ostap Bender. Lorena \u00eei plecat\u0103 \u00een Costa Rica s\u0103 fac\u0103 un interviu cu crocodilii a\u0219a c\u0103 profit \u0219i scriu nesupravegeat. \ud83d\ude42 Pe vremea...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2470","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2470","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2470"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2470\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2470"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2470"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2470"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}