A\u0219 dori s\u0103 v\u0103 \u00eentreb ceva nastru\u0219nic,dar foarte serios. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u00cen \u201econversa\u021biile\u201d mele de a lungul vie\u021bii, am auzit o afirma\u021bie: \u201eam auzit ceva ur\u00e2t despre tine, \u0219tie toat\u0103 lumea… m\u0103 mir c\u0103 tu nu \u0219tii.\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Pare o r\u0103utate banal\u0103. Dar am auzit expresia de la prea mult\u0103 lume. \u00cens\u0103 nu am \u00een\u021beles despre ce anume e vorba. Nu am pe cine \u00eentreba, \u0219i \u00eentrebarea mea e cum s\u0103\u00a0m\u0103 folosesc de google ,s\u0103 pot afla ce ,de ce \u0219i cum. Dac\u0103 \u00eemi pute\u021bi spune ceva, bine dac\u0103 nu ,nu.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n V\u0103 mul\u021bumesc. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n X. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n Drag\u0103 X., <\/p>\n\n\n\n De c\u00e2te ori s-a legat de mine c\u00e2te un agarici online, de-a lungul vie\u021bii, am auzit o afirma\u021bie: \u201e\u0219tiu unde stai\u201d. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Care e caracteristica pe care aceste dou\u0103 afirma\u021bii o au \u00een comun? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Tentativa j\u0103vreasc\u0103 a interlocutorului de a exploata un poten\u021bial punct sensibil cu o tentativ\u0103 de gaslighting: \u00een cazul t\u0103u, teama de gura lumii, \u00een cazul meu, anxietatea legat\u0103 de un poten\u021bial agresor care s\u0103 m\u0103 a\u0219tepte noaptea \u00een scara blocului. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u0218i aceste dou\u0103 afirma\u021bii mai au un lucru \u00een comun: ambiguitatea. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Ca dovad\u0103 c\u0103, dac\u0103 \u00eentrebi prompt: Ia spune, unde stau? – agariciul continu\u0103 s\u0103 amenin\u021be, dar se face c\u0103 n-a auzit \u00eentrebarea. Tu: \u201eZi, b\u0103, ratatule, unde stau, nu te face c\u0103 n-ai auzit.\u201d \u0218i a\u0219a \u00eel faci s\u0103 cedeze. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u0218i tu po\u021bi lua gaslighterii t\u0103i care \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103-\u021bi diminueze sentimentul stimei de sine cu pretins\u0103 zvonistic\u0103: Ce ai auzit? Pariez c\u0103 r\u0103spunsul este: Nu pot s\u0103-\u021bi spun. La care tu: Ce nu po\u021bi s\u0103-mi spui nu exist\u0103, iar pe viitor vom aborda doar lucruri pe care po\u021bi s\u0103 mi le spui. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Iar dac\u0103 persoana insist\u0103, pleci \u0219i o la\u0219i s\u0103 vorbeasc\u0103 singur\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Sunt extrem de mul\u021bi p\u0103duchi din \u0103\u0219tia care \u00ee\u0219i extrag satisfac\u021bia din spirala de negativitate, depresie \u0219i anxietate \u00een care \u00eei trimit pe al\u021bii, \u0219i singurul modus operandi cu ei este s\u0103 le ar\u0103\u021bi ferm c\u0103 nu pui botul \u0219i s\u0103 le dai macaroana f\u0103r\u0103 echivoc, apoi s\u0103 setezi consecin\u021be: Dac\u0103 mai \u00eencerci de-astea cu mine, se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 X. Dar X s\u0103 se chiar \u00eent\u00e2mple, c\u0103 altfel, vor recidiva. <\/p>\n\n\n\n C\u00e2nd un om are s\u0103 te acuze de ceva concret, o face f\u0103r\u0103 s-o ard\u0103 pe mister \u0219i suspans. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u00cen general, dac\u0103 n-ai f\u0103cut nimic reprobabil: s\u0103 min\u021bi \u0219i s\u0103 \u00een\u0219eli \u00eencrederea cuiva, s\u0103 datorezi bani sau s\u0103 \u00eei promi\u021bi uneia o rela\u021bie, iar tu s\u0103 umbli cu altele pe la spatele ei – i meeean, ceva obiectiv nasol – vr\u0103jelile astea sunt simple vr\u0103jeli \u0219i trebuie tratate ca atare. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Sper c\u0103 \u021bi-am fost util\u0103, <\/p>\n\n\n\n Lorena. <\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dac\u0103 apreciezi aceast\u0103 rubric\u0103, po\u021bi sus\u021bine la r\u00e2ndul t\u0103u site-ul \u00een singurul mod care conteaz\u0103. Aici<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi pe TikTok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Periodic, oferim iubire cititorului nostru. \u00cen sensul \u00een care el sau ea, sau chiar tu, de ce nu, ne trimi(te)\u021bi problema voastr\u0103 de suflet...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":13001,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25478","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/email.jpg?fit=602%2C689&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25478","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=25478"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25478\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25480,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25478\/revisions\/25480"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13001"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=25478"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=25478"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=25478"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\")
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