Fie c\u0103 e\u0219ti b\u0103iat, fie c\u0103 e\u0219ti fat\u0103, dac\u0103 ai familie tradi\u021bional\u0103, desf\u0103\u0219ur\u0103torul ac\u021biunii este a\u0219a: b\u0103rba\u021bii stau la mas\u0103 cu bur\u021bile \u00een v\u00e2nt, iar mama ta alearg\u0103 din buc\u0103t\u0103rie \u00een sufragerie, dus \u0219i \u00eentors, cu toate felurile de m\u00e2ncare. Un mod de a sc\u0103pa de discu\u021bii aiurea e s\u0103 te oferi s\u0103 preiei par\u021bial sarcina. Unu, o faci super fericit\u0103 pe maic\u0103-ta, care se bucur\u0103 c\u0103 m\u0103car \u00een chestia asta nu semeni cu porcul de taic\u0103-tu. \u0218i doi: scapi de extreeeeem de multe b\u0103g\u0103ri \u00een seam\u0103 inadecvate \u0219i inoportune. \u0218i trei: faptul c\u0103 te tot mi\u0219ti \u0219i te tot agi\u021bi duce la mai pu\u021bin m\u00e2ncat de stres \u0219i la mai pu\u021bin sl\u0103bit de urgen\u021b\u0103 \u00een ianuarie. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
2. \u0218i dac\u0103 tot faci drumuri spre buc\u0103t\u0103rie, po\u021bi s\u0103 mimezi c\u0103 tocmai cau\u021bi ceva, sau c\u0103 ai observat c\u0103 lipse\u0219te nu \u0219tiu ce vin, care se \u0219tie c\u0103 aduce noroc, sau *alt BS* \u0219i te po\u021bi da disp\u0103rut mai mult <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Cine-mparte, parte-\u0219i face. Din toate punctele de vedere. Po\u021bi improviza \u00een buc\u0103t\u0103rie mare parte din durata mesei, \u0219i lumea o s\u0103 uite, pur \u0219i simplu, de tine. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 3. Pune-le \u00eentreb\u0103ri despre ei <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Un excelent mod de a distrage aten\u021bia de pe capul t\u0103u e s\u0103 faci tu prima mutare la \u0219ah, \u0219i s\u0103 \u00eentrebi despre boli, serialul lor preferat, certurile cu vecinele (fiecare rud\u0103 \u00een v\u00e2rst\u0103 are o vecin\u0103 c***\u0103 nenorocit\u0103 care d\u0103 muzic\u0103 tare \u0219i priime\u0219te b\u0103rba\u021bi acas\u0103, ptiu, bagaboanta ordinar\u0103).<\/p>\n\n\n\n C\u00e2nd \u00eei porne\u0219ti \u00eentr-un rant despre un subiect care-i pasioneaz\u0103, altul dec\u00e2t tine, pluseaz\u0103 cu \u00eentreb\u0103ri mici, dar la obiect, cam cum bagi lemne \u00een sob\u0103 s\u0103 \u00eentre\u021bii un foc. F\u0103-i s\u0103 vorbeasc\u0103 despre ei \u0219i or s\u0103 uite, pur \u0219i simplu, s\u0103 te \u00eentrebe lucruri despre tine. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 4. Coopteaz\u0103 rudele cool <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Fiecare familie are unchiul chitarist fost pletos \u0219i m\u0103tu\u0219a care a fost gagic\u0103 de lume \u00een tinere\u021be. \u0102\u0219tia au tr\u0103it \u0219i ei boem \u0219i periculos \u0219i \u00een\u021beleg c\u0103 tu le calci pe urme. \u0218i atunci, din fraternitate de haiduc, vor s\u0103ri prompt s\u0103 te scoat\u0103 din gura maic\u0103-tii, a bunic\u0103-tii, a unchiului \u0219o\u0219ocar \u0219i a cui se mai nimere\u0219te s\u0103 aib\u0103 p\u0103reri despre via\u021ba ta. Vor \u0219ti s\u0103-i umple prompt paharul de \u021buic\u0103 \u0219i s\u0103 zic\u0103: Hai, noroc, Marinic\u0103, s\u0103 dea Dumnezeu s\u0103n\u0103tate \u0219i bel\u0219ug. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Iar dac\u0103 nu ai rude cool, po\u021bi fi tu ruda cool care saboteaz\u0103 orice \u00eencercare de pis\u0103logeal\u0103 cu paharul de \u021buic\u0103 \u0219i cu mult\u0103 s\u0103n\u0103tate. Trebuie s\u0103 ai un pic de tupeu, dar v\u0103 lini\u0219tesc: func\u021bioneaz\u0103 \u00een 99% din cazuri. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 5. Fii primul\/prima care sare s\u0103 adune farfurii, tac\u00e2muri, pahare, de c\u00e2te ori e cazul <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Impresioneaz\u0103-i cu h\u0103rnicia \u0219i vor uita c\u0103 te-ai desp\u0103r\u021bit de b\u0103iatul \u0103la bun, care avea \u0219i ma\u0219in\u0103, \u0219i nici nu te b\u0103tea, \u0219i c\u0103 cine te mai ia pe tine la 32 de ani, c\u00e2nd eu aveam deja patru copii \u0219i cel mai mare d\u0103dea admiterea la liceu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 6. Ofer\u0103-te s\u0103 duci c\u00e2inele la plimbare <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Dup\u0103 mas\u0103 \u0219i dup\u0103 multe pahare, limbile tind s\u0103 se dezlege \u0219i s\u0103 devin\u0103 t\u0103ioase. Dar asta nu se poate \u00eent\u00e2mpla dac\u0103 nu au cu cine. Ia-l pe cel mai bun prieten al omului, care nu-\u021bi va repro\u0219a niciodat\u0103 c\u0103 nu ai g\u0103sit \u0219i tu o fat\u0103 bun\u0103, de cas\u0103, \u0219i du-l la o lung\u0103 plimbare. S\u0103 fac\u0103 exerci\u021biu, c\u0103 a m\u00e2ncat mult de Cr\u0103ciun. P\u00e2n\u0103 te \u00eentorci, poate ai noroc \u0219i jum\u0103tate din rude au plecat acas\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 7. C\u00e2nd insist\u0103 \u0219i insist\u0103 \u0219i insist\u0103 <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Tehnicile astea soft \u021bin cu rudele normale \u0219i cu un coeficient de fxxtere de grij\u0103 rezonabil. Dar mai sunt \u0219i rudele-r\u00e2ie, care se oplo\u0219esc pe capul t\u0103u ca impozitul pe om \u0219i nu se dau biruite. Aici, e momentul s\u0103 dai milit\u0103ria jos din pod: <\/p>\n\n\n\n -Da, nu m\u0103 intereseaz\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 m\u0103rit, e vreo problem\u0103? E via\u021ba mea, nu a ta, \u0219i nu am pretins nic\u0103ieri c\u0103 e cazul s\u0103-\u021bi plac\u0103 \u021bie cum tr\u0103iesc eu. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Dar milit\u0103ria odat\u0103 cobor\u00e2t\u0103 din pod, trebuie s\u0103 te \u021bii tare pe pozi\u021bie p\u00e2n\u0103 c\u00e2nd ruda-r\u00e2ie d\u0103 \u00eenapoi. O acoperi vocal \u0219i NU te la\u0219i \u00eentrerupt. \u00ce\u021bi sus\u021bii punctul de vedere, bazat pe \u201eE alegerea mea \u0219i nu te bagi tu \u00een alegerea mea\u201d \u0219i pe \u201dNu am zis niciodat\u0103 c\u0103 vreau s\u0103 tr\u0103iesc ca tine. Uit\u0103-te \u0219i tu la tine, unde ai ajuns, tr\u0103ind ca tine. E tot ce nu vreau s\u0103 devin\u201d, p\u00e2n\u0103 c\u00e2nd abandoneaz\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Cum zice \u0219i RuPaul: I always try to come from a place of love, but sometimes, you need to BREAK IT DOWN for a motherf**ker.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n 8. C\u00e2nd fac ga\u0219c\u0103 \u00eempotriva ta <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Poate cea mai nasoal\u0103 ipostaz\u0103 e c\u00e2nd al\u021bi membri se familie pactizeaz\u0103 cu ruda-r\u00e2ie \u0219i \u00eencep s\u0103 te streseze \u00een cor. Atunci, po\u021bi aplica tactica delirului controlat. <\/p>\n\n\n\n -Unde o s\u0103 ajungi \u00een halul \u0103sta? <\/p>\n\n\n\n -Dar am ajuns deja. Voi nu \u0219ti\u021bi, dar a doua mea slujb\u0103 e de lucr\u0103toare sexual\u0103 pe M\u0103t\u0103sari. <\/p>\n\n\n\n -Ceee? <\/p>\n\n\n\n -Da, cel mai tare \u00eemi plac **ganii, c\u0103 \u0103ia o au mai mare. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Replicile astea o s\u0103-i oripileze at\u00e2t de tare, \u00eenc\u00e2t vor uita de la ce s-au luat \u0219i o s\u0103 tac\u0103 bloca\u021bi la urm\u0103toarea mutare. Apoi, \u00ee\u021bi iei \u00eenc\u0103 un copan de pui \u0219i \u00eel savurezi lent, a\u0219a cum o face regina penisurilor interlope. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 9. E perfect ok s\u0103 nu te duci<\/strong>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Dac\u0103 \u0219tii c\u0103 nu te a\u0219teapt\u0103 dec\u00e2t discu\u021bii stupide \u0219i c\u0103 nu vei beneficia de nici un fel de empatie, po\u021bi face Cr\u0103ciunul cu un grup de prieteni la fel de panica\u021bi de familiile lor, sau \u00ee\u021bi iei trei sticle de \u0219ampanie \u0219i ni\u0219te m\u00e2ncare delicioas\u0103 pentru m\u00e2\u021b\u0103, c\u0103 \u0219i ea e om, \u0219i s\u0103 faci un superb Cr\u0103ciun de b\u0103ut \u0219i tors. \u00cen fond, \u0219i M\u00e2ntuitorul nostru Isus Cristos, pe care \u00eel s\u0103rb\u0103torim de Cr\u0103ciun, a murit singur. Ai fi \u00een spiritul real al s\u0103rb\u0103torii. <\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dac\u0103 \u021bi-a pl\u0103cut articolul, sus\u021bine site-ul \u00een singurul mod care conteaz\u0103. Aici<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi pe TikTok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Dac\u0103 ai genul \u0103la de familie \u00een haine albe \u0219i z\u00e2mbete pe fa\u021b\u0103 care apare mereu pe pliantele antiavort, felicit\u0103ri, te descurci \u0219i f\u0103r\u0103...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":18780,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25828","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/christmas-table.jpg?fit=640%2C426&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25828","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=25828"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25828\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":28920,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25828\/revisions\/28920"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18780"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=25828"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=25828"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=25828"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\")
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n