{"id":26259,"date":"2024-03-29T10:33:17","date_gmt":"2024-03-29T07:33:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=26259"},"modified":"2024-03-29T10:33:20","modified_gmt":"2024-03-29T07:33:20","slug":"sunt-brad-pitt-si-te-iubesc","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/sunt-brad-pitt-si-te-iubesc\/","title":{"rendered":"Sunt Brad Pitt \u015fi te iubesc"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Drag\u0103 Maricica, <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sunt Brad Pitt. Nu, pe bune, jur pe mama \u015fi pe tata c\u0103 sunt Brad Pitt. E adev\u0103rat, tu nu te prea ui\u0163i la filme, altfel ai fi aflat c\u0103 nu mai ar\u0103t chiar a\u015fa: <\/p>\n\n\n

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\"\"<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

\u015ei nici a\u015fa: <\/p>\n\n\n

\n
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\u015ei nici a\u015fa: <\/p>\n\n\n

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(Note to self: Abia uit\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 la toate astea, realizez c\u00e2t de homoerotic\u0103 a fost, de fapt, cariera mea.) <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ci a\u015fa: <\/p>\n\n\n

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Desigur, \u00een continuare sunt cu zece clase peste p\u00e2rlitul \u0103la ur\u00e2t ca noaptea care te freac\u0103 la icre cu mesaje private, dar ar\u0103t ca \u015fi cum a\u015f prefera s\u0103 vin\u0103 o stimat\u0103 doamn\u0103 \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 oblojeasc\u0103 cu ni\u015fte tincturi antireumatice, dec\u00e2t s\u0103 se a\u015ftepte de la mine s-o foot cu bestialitate \u015fi cu rapacitate animalic\u0103 p\u00e2n\u0103 se crap\u0103 de ziu\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u015ei mai important: Am la bani de-i \u00eentorc cu lopata. OK? Uite aici poze cu to\u0163i banii mei. Ignor\u0103, te rog, logoul de shutterstock din col\u0163, e doar o iluzie. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u015etii ce tare te iubesc, Maricico? S\u0103-mi sar\u0103 ochii din cap dac\u0103 nu bolunzesc de dragostea ta. Clocotesc chilo\u0163ii pe mine de dorul t\u0103u. Toate fotomodelele \u015fi actri\u0163ele superbe cu care am eu treab\u0103 p\u0103lesc \u00een compara\u0163ie cu \u015for\u0163ul t\u0103u \u00eenflorat \u015fi \u015fosetele cu model de inimioare. E\u015fti o viziune a amorului chintesen\u0163ial, Maricico. Cum, ce e aia \u201echintesen\u021bial\u201d? Perfect, e\u0219ti \u0219i proast\u0103. Femeia ideal\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Acum trimite \u0219i tu 10.000 de euro, s\u0103-mi demonstrezi c\u0103 meri\u021bi dragostea mea. C\u0103 dac\u0103 nu, m\u0103 \u00eentorc la Angelina. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Te pup \u00een orificii \u00een care nu visai c\u0103 vrei s\u0103 fii pupat\u0103, <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Al t\u0103u, <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Brad. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dac\u0103 apreciezi acest articol, po\u021bi sus\u021bine la r\u00e2ndul t\u0103u site-ul \u00een singurul mod care conteaz\u0103. Aici<\/strong><\/a>. Pentru dona\u021bii de 50 de euro sau mai mult, \u00eemi po\u021bi propune tu un subiect. Pentru dona\u021bii de 25 de euro sau mai mult, po\u021bi propune o poezie pentru cele 365 de zile de poezie.<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe Twitter<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi pe TikTok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Drag\u0103 Maricica, Sunt Brad Pitt. Nu, pe bune, jur pe mama \u015fi pe tata c\u0103 sunt Brad Pitt. E adev\u0103rat, tu nu te prea...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15167,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-26259","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/brad-pitt.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26259","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26259"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26259\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26262,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26259\/revisions\/26262"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15167"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26259"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26259"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26259"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}