{"id":26641,"date":"2024-06-27T09:58:53","date_gmt":"2024-06-27T06:58:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=26641"},"modified":"2024-06-27T09:58:56","modified_gmt":"2024-06-27T06:58:56","slug":"de-ce-romanii-nu-se-duc-la-terapie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/de-ce-romanii-nu-se-duc-la-terapie\/","title":{"rendered":"De ce rom\u00e2nii nu se duc la terapie"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">De multe ori, sec\u021biunea de comentarii e at\u00e2t de \u00eenecat\u0103 \u00een ur\u0103, \u00een prejudec\u0103\u021bi sau \u00een intruziuni pe care \u00een mod cert nu le justific\u0103 nici o prietenie prealabil\u0103 cu cel pe care \u00eel s\u00e2c\u00e2i, \u00eenc\u00e2t ai senza\u021bia c\u0103 te ui\u021bi la pacien\u021bii \u00een plin delir \u0219i \u00een plin\u0103 criz\u0103 maniacal\u0103 ai unei institu\u021bii de tratament psihiatric. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0218i da, foarte mul\u021bi rom\u00e2ni au tulbur\u0103ri emo\u021bionale \u0219i mintale grave. Foarte pu\u021bine sunt diagnosticate, \u0219i evident, nici nu sunt tratate. Oamenii respectivi nu  \u0219tiu c\u0103 se poate mai bine, pentru c\u0103 tr\u0103iesc cu acele g\u00e2nduri \u0219i idei, poate de c\u00e2nd s-au n\u0103scut. Insuflate de o educa\u021bie defectuoas\u0103, de modele parentale disfunc\u021bionale, ba chiar de o copil\u0103rie abuziv\u0103, oamenii sunt bloca\u021bi \u00eentr-un cerc vicios al urii \u0219i al agresiunii, \u0219i nu acceseaz\u0103 niciun fel de resurse care \u00eei ajut\u0103 s\u0103 ias\u0103 de acolo. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Cred c\u0103 sunt doi factori primordiali prin care rom\u00e2nii contribuie activ la problemele mintale \u0219i emo\u021bionale ale celor din jur, precum \u0219i la cele proprii. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Prima e cultura de tip \u021ba\u021ba satului. Avem o tendin\u021b\u0103 na\u021bional\u0103 de a ne pfoote extrem de tare grija de treaba altuia, dar niciodat\u0103 \u00een mod pozitiv \u0219i constructiv, ci doar a\u0219a, la nivel de b\u0103\u0219c\u0103lie josnic\u0103 \u0219i dizgra\u021bioas\u0103. Eternul \u201eeu, \u00een locul t\u0103u\u201d, dublat de o incapacitate cras\u0103 de a \u00een\u021belege cu adev\u0103rat situa\u021bia celuilalt; preten\u021bia arogant\u0103 c\u0103 ne-am descurca mai bine \u00een condi\u021biile date, de\u0219i nu le tr\u0103im pe pielea noastr\u0103; impunerea ideilor fixe \u0219i presiunii sociale \u201etradi\u021bionale\u201d, ca de exemplu, a presa oameni imaturi \u0219i nepreg\u0103ti\u021bi pentru c\u0103s\u0103torie sau pentru a avea copii de care nu \u0219tiu sau nu-\u0219i permit s\u0103 aib\u0103 grij\u0103. Incapacitatea de a asuma c\u0103, dac\u0103 cel\u0103lalt are cu adev\u0103rat nevoie de perspectiva noastr\u0103 \u0219i o consider\u0103 relevant\u0103 pentru situa\u021bia lui, \u0219tie s\u0103 \u00eentrebe \u0219i singur. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Aceast\u0103 pfootere de grij\u0103 b\u0103\u0219c\u0103lioas\u0103 e o surs\u0103 teribil\u0103 de disconfort. \u0218i pentru cei ca mine, care nu vor lua niciodat\u0103 asupra lor mizeriile pe care le debiteaz\u0103 Mirel din Turnu M\u0103gurele, ci sunt doar  irita\u021bi de intruziune. Dar mai ales pentru cei care chiar cred ce are Mirel de debitat \u0219i ajung s\u0103 \u00ee\u0219i rateze via\u021ba c\u0103ut\u00e2nd  s\u0103 corespund\u0103 unei imagini false create de al\u021bii \u0219i ignor\u00e2ndu-\u0219i propriile nevoi. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A doua e cultura de tip v\u0103ic\u0103real\u0103 neurmat\u0103 de ac\u021biuni concrete de reparare a problemei. Rom\u00e2nii se pl\u00e2ng de so\u021bi mitocani sau de so\u021bii isterice, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 divor\u021beze. Se pl\u00e2ng de p\u0103rin\u021bi b\u0103g\u0103re\u021bi, dar nu se mut\u0103 cu chirie. Se pl\u00e2ng de joburi exploatatoare \u0219i prost pl\u0103tite, dar nu caut\u0103 altceva. Se pl\u00e2ng de situa\u021bii care ar avea solu\u021bie, dac\u0103, \u00een loc s\u0103 te pl\u00e2ngi, ai respira ad\u00e2nc \u0219i te-ai g\u00e2ndi cum po\u021bi remedia problema. Eventual cau\u021bi un \u021bap isp\u0103\u0219itor: cum ar fi fostul, chit c\u0103 \u0103la te-a l\u0103sat \u00een pace de ani buni; fosta, chit c\u0103 aia deja s-a rec\u0103s\u0103torit \u0219i nu te sup\u0103r\u0103 \u00een mod real cu nimic; gigel din liceu; care era  un bully agresiv; chit c\u0103 acum locui\u021bi \u00een ora\u0219e diferite \u0219i \u0219ansa de a-l re\u00eent\u00e2lni fizic e nul\u0103. \u0218i tot a\u0219a. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0218i totu\u0219i, de ce nu se duc rom\u00e2nii la terapie, de\u0219i ea le-ar putea remedia multe probleme? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>A) \u201dEu nu sunt nebun(\u0103)<\/strong>!\u201d  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Unul dintre efectele secundare dezastruoase ale culturii intruziunii nesolicitate este  c\u0103 ne face pe to\u021bi foarte, foarte, FOARTE defensivi. Pentru ei, s\u0103 te duci la terapie e s\u0103 recuno\u0219ti c\u0103 m\u0103-ta avea dreptate c\u00e2nd spunea c\u0103 e\u0219ti gre\u0219eala vie\u021bii ei. Pentru ei, s\u0103 te duci la terapie e ca \u0219i cum ai recunoa\u0219te c\u0103 exul t\u0103u indiferent, \u0219eful narcisist \u0219i m\u0103tu\u0219\u0103-ta Aglaia pis\u0103loaga aveau to\u021bi dreptate c\u00e2nd te tratau oribil. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">C\u00e2nd colo, e invers. E faptul c\u0103, dup\u0103 ce ai tr\u0103it cu exul indiferent, \u0219eful narcisist \u0219i Aglaia pis\u0103loaga, e cel mai s\u0103n\u0103tos s\u0103 faci terapie, s\u0103 g\u0103se\u0219ti un punct de echilibru \u0219i pozitivitate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">S\u0103n\u0103tatea mintal\u0103 nu e ceva binar, cu op\u021biunile \u201enormal\u201d \u0219i \u201enebun\u201d, ci un univers complex \u0219i misterios, \u00een care lucrurile se pot degrada subtil, progresiv, f\u0103r\u0103 ca tu s\u0103 realizezi. Apoi, te pomene\u0219ti c\u0103 urli singur pe strad\u0103 la du\u0219mani care nu-s acolo. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nu mai bine te duci din timp la terapie, s\u0103 previi asta? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>B) N-am timp! <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A\u0219 fi cump\u0103rat asta \u00een 1995, c\u00e2nd majoritatea \u0219efilor \u00ee\u0219i \u021bineau angaja\u021bii la munc\u0103 p\u00e2n\u0103 seara, f\u0103r\u0103 ore suplimentare pl\u0103tite, \u0219i exista internet doar la cafenele dedicate. Acum, c\u00e2nd at\u00e2\u021bia psihologi ofer\u0103 terapie online, \u0219i dac\u0103 tu po\u021bi doar noaptea, g\u0103se\u0219ti un medic din SUA care e fix atunci \u00een business hours \u0219i ofer\u0103 terapie pe Zoom, timpul \u00eenceteaz\u0103 s\u0103 fie o problem\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dac\u0103 ai net acas\u0103, terapia e de g\u0103sit la orice or\u0103, dac\u0103 te deranjezi s\u0103 cau\u021bi. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">C) <strong>N-am bani! <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Problema banilor e mereu relevant\u0103 pentru noi to\u021bi. Oric\u00e2\u021bi ai avea, tendin\u021ba uman\u0103 normal\u0103 e s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi creezi obliga\u021bii \u0219i cheltuieli care s\u0103 te for\u021beze s\u0103 ai nevoie de mai mul\u021bi \u0219i mai mul\u021bi. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dar dac\u0103 \u021bi-ai restructura priorit\u0103\u021bile, la modul \u201epot tr\u0103i o via\u021b\u0103 perfect ok f\u0103r\u0103 a, b \u0219i c, dar via\u021ba mea nu e ok c\u00e2nd eu experimentez zi de zi o panic\u0103 teribil\u0103 legat\u0103 de ziua de m\u00e2ine \u0219i o anxietate de c\u00e2te ori trebuie s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2lnesc cu o persoan\u0103 necunoscut\u0103\u201d; ai descoperi c\u0103 ba da, ai bani. Eu mi-am dat seama c\u00e2\u021bi bani am de fapt, dup\u0103 ce am renun\u021bat la sticla de vin pe care o goleam \u00een fiecare sear\u0103. Subit, m\u0103 b\u0103l\u0103ceam \u00een bani. 50 de lei sticla ori 30 de zile ne d\u0103 1500 de lei pe lun\u0103. Din care po\u021bi face c\u00e2t\u0103 terapie dore\u0219te p\u0103s\u0103rica ta. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>D)  M\u0103 descurc \u0219i singur. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dac\u0103 solu\u021bia ta e s\u0103 deranjezi str\u0103ini cu b\u0103gare \u00een seam\u0103 la 3 diminea\u021b\u0103, sau s-o \u00eenjuri pe F\u0103nica de pe net c\u0103 nu tr\u0103ie\u0219te conform ideilor tale, sau s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi \u021bii prietenele ore \u00een \u0219ir la telefon s\u0103 te vaie\u021bi \u0219i s\u0103 nu te \u00eentrebi ce altceva ar avea ele de f\u0103cut \u00een loc s\u0103 te asculte, nu, nu te descurci \u0219i singur. \u0218i la un moment dat, prietenele vor mima c\u0103 au ratat apelul. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Doar pentru c\u0103 un om e prietenos cu tine, nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 are obliga\u021bia s\u0103 devin\u0103 tomberonul t\u0103u emo\u021bional. Asta e treaba unui terapeut pl\u0103tit. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>E) Ru\u0219inea <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sunt o gr\u0103mad\u0103 de oameni care tr\u0103iesc un interminabil conflict interior \u00eentre traumele \u0219i disfunc\u021biile care \u00eei fac s\u0103 comit\u0103 t\u00e2mpenii, \u0219i ra\u021biunea care \u00eei face s\u0103 fie extrem de ru\u0219ina\u021bi de respectivele t\u00e2mpenii. \u201dCe-o s\u0103 zic\u0103 doctorul dac\u0103 aude c\u00e2te rahaturi am f\u0103cut? Hai s\u0103 le \u00eengrop ad\u00e2nc \u00een mine \u0219i s\u0103 mimez c\u0103 n-au existat\u201d. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Realitatea e c\u0103 nici un terapeut competent nu o s\u0103 te judece \u00een acest mod. Sau dac\u0103 o face, e un impostor. Realitatea e c\u0103 to\u021bi oamenii au scheletele lor din dulap, de care le e o ru\u0219ine de nedescris, \u0219i c\u0103 terapeutul t\u0103u a auzit, probabil, pove\u0219ti mai oribile dec\u00e2t ale tale. \u0218i realitatea e c\u0103 scopul lui nu e s\u0103 fie \u021ba\u021ba satului, s\u0103 te critice superficial, ci s\u0103 te ajute s\u0103 evoluezi. Dac\u0103 d\u0103 semne de \u021ba\u021ba satului, e un impostor \u0219i e cazul  s\u0103 cau\u021bi pe altcineva. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>F) Frica de schimbare <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dac\u0103 terapia te ajut\u0103 s\u0103 descoperi modurile \u00een care \u00ee\u021bi faci r\u0103u, subit con\u0219tientizezi c\u0103 responsabilitatea pentru propria fericire e \u00een m\u00e2inile tale. Nu \u00eel po\u021bi \u00eenvinui la infinit pe exul abuziv pentru nefericirea  ta de acum, dac\u0103 v-a\u021bi desp\u0103r\u021bit acum cinci ani \u0219i \u0103la nu te-a mai sup\u0103rat cu absolut nimic din acel moment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0218i nu e u\u0219or s\u0103 treci din ipostaza de victim\u0103 etern\u0103 a \u00eemprejur\u0103rilor \u00een omul responsabil pentru propriile decizii. Mai e \u0219i frica de faptul c\u0103 vei lua decizii extrem de proaste. E nevoie de asumare \u0219i efort. \u0218i mul\u021bi nu sunt preg\u0103ti\u021bi de aceast\u0103 munc\u0103. Nu e mai simplu s\u0103 b\u0103ltesc mai departe \u00een nefericire \u0219i s\u0103-l bomb\u0103n pe porcul \u0103la cui are chef s\u0103 m\u0103 asculte? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Terapia e un proces lung \u0219i complicat.  Dar la final, vei fi omul care nu are nevoie de vinova\u021bi \u0219i nu ar nevoie de certuri, pentru c\u0103 e prea ocupat s\u0103 tr\u0103iasc\u0103. Eu zic c\u0103 merit\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dac\u0103 apreciezi acest articol, po\u021bi sus\u021bine la r\u00e2ndul t\u0103u site-ul \u00een singurul mod care conteaz\u0103.&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.paypal.com\/paypalme\/Trollywood\"><strong>Aici<\/strong><\/a>. Pentru dona\u021bii de 50 de euro sau mai mult, \u00eemi po\u021bi propune tu un subiect. Pentru dona\u021bii de 25 de euro sau mai mult, po\u021bi propune o poezie pentru<strong>&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lorena.lupu\">cele 365 de zile de poezie.<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><a href=\"http:\/\/paypal.me\/Trollywood\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea-300x300.jpg?resize=300%2C300\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-14577\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=768%2C768&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=160%2C160&amp;ssl=1 160w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=320%2C320&amp;ssl=1 320w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=184%2C184&amp;ssl=1 184w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=600%2C600&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?resize=100%2C100&amp;ssl=1 100w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/cafea.jpg?w=931&amp;ssl=1 931w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da like pe&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lorenaalmighty\/\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>, follow pe&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/lorenalupu\">Twitter<\/a><\/strong>&nbsp;\u015fi&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/lorena.lup\/\">Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCCHBtHi6S2GlUFqETH70cjQ\">YouTube<\/a><\/strong>&nbsp;\u015fi pe<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lorena.lupu\">&nbsp;TikTok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>De multe ori, sec\u021biunea de comentarii e at\u00e2t de \u00eenecat\u0103 \u00een ur\u0103, \u00een prejudec\u0103\u021bi sau \u00een intruziuni pe care \u00een mod cert nu le&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":26642,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-26641","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/terapie.jpg?fit=853%2C672&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26641","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26641"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26641\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26643,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26641\/revisions\/26643"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/26642"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26641"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26641"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26641"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}