{"id":2757,"date":"2010-10-14T11:09:25","date_gmt":"2010-10-14T08:09:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.wordpress.com\/?p=2757"},"modified":"2010-10-14T11:09:25","modified_gmt":"2010-10-14T08:09:25","slug":"patru-tablete-de-maltofer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/patru-tablete-de-maltofer\/","title":{"rendered":"Patru tablete de Maltofer"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Sau cum era s\u0103 mor ca proasta degeaba.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cen ultima vreme, toat\u0103 lumea mi-a spus c\u0103 am o paloare de mort. Am \u015fi ajuns o dat\u0103 la urgen\u0163e, dup\u0103 ce am le\u015finat. F\u0103ceam tahicardie din nimic, nu mai puteam face efort fizic, nu m\u0103 mai concentram, m\u0103 apucam de chestii \u015fi sim\u0163eam c\u0103 nu le pot duce la cap\u0103t. Ca o cretin\u0103, am presupus c\u0103 problema e undeva deasupra g\u00e2tului \u015fi am fost la psiholog. Am povestit minunat despre acte ratate, despre stres cotidian, despre frustr\u0103ri din copil\u0103rie. M-am r\u0103sf\u0103\u0163at cu plimb\u0103ri \u00een sta\u0163iuni montane. Mi-a \u015fi venit r\u0103u \u00eentr-un peisaj idilic \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 aproape nimeni \u00een jur, de am speriat-o pe prietena cu care m\u0103 dusesem. Partea cea mai nasoal\u0103 era senza\u0163ia aia de neputin\u0163\u0103, de sl\u0103biciune, faptul c\u0103 nu mai de\u0163ineam controlul. M\u0103 uram. M\u0103 for\u0163am fizic s\u0103 dep\u0103\u015fesc starea asta &#8211; \u015fi nu mergea.<\/p>\n<p>Apoi, unei prietene doctori\u0163e i-a dat prin cap evidentul: &#8220;B\u0103i, dar dac\u0103 problema ta e totu\u015fi de natur\u0103 fizic\u0103?&#8221; \u015ei m-a trimis la analize. Care au ie\u015fit normale &#8211; cu excep\u0163ia celei mai mari caren\u0163e de fier din istorie, \u015fi a anemiei aFERente. \u015ei m-a luat la penis: &#8220;Vezi de ce n-are ursul coad\u0103? Umbli dup\u0103 cai verzi pe pere\u0163i, \u00een loc s\u0103 vii s\u0103 vedem concret care-i problema!&#8221; Da&#8217; chiar te po\u0163i sim\u0163i at\u00e2t de lamentabil de la o banal\u0103 lips\u0103 de fier? &#8220;Po\u0163i s\u0103 \u015fi mori lamentabil de la o banal\u0103 lips\u0103 de fier, dac\u0103 nu faci ceva.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>\u015ei fac ceva. Culmea e c\u0103, de patru tablete de Maltofer \u00eencoace, mi-au revenit \u015fi energia creatoare, \u015fi cheful de b\u0103ut, \u015fi cheful de sex. Anyone interested? \ud83d\ude00<\/p>\n<div class=\"video-container\"><span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"700\" height=\"394\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/OxZp4VEopcE?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sau cum era s\u0103 mor ca proasta degeaba. \u00cen ultima vreme, toat\u0103 lumea mi-a spus c\u0103 am o paloare de mort. Am \u015fi ajuns&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2757","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2757","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2757"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2757\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2757"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2757"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2757"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}