{"id":2762,"date":"2010-10-15T21:19:16","date_gmt":"2010-10-15T18:19:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.wordpress.com\/?p=2762"},"modified":"2010-10-15T21:19:16","modified_gmt":"2010-10-15T18:19:16","slug":"oficially-idiot","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/oficially-idiot\/","title":{"rendered":"Oficially idiot"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Veneam io azi c\u0103tinel spre cas\u0103, pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 parc, c\u00e2nd am auzit ni\u015fte mieun\u0103turi triste dintr-un tufi\u015f.<br \/>\n-Nu v\u0103 sup\u0103ra\u0163i, sunte\u0163i tufi\u015ful care miaun\u0103? a\u015f fi \u00eentrebat eu dac\u0103 a\u015f fi fost \u00een filmul \u0103sta.<\/p>\n<div class=\"video-container\"><span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"700\" height=\"394\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/7yNV-GXoeCM?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span><\/div>\n<p>Numai c\u0103 nu se potrivea tonul cu m\u0103rimea. Tufi\u015ful se \u00eentindea c\u00e2t jum\u0103tate de bulevard, era lat de vreun metru \u015fi jum\u0103tate, dar mieuna foarte infantil \u015fi sopran. M-am l\u0103sat \u00een genunchi (de\u015fi purtam pantaloni cu dung\u0103) \u015fi m-am uitat pe sub cr\u0103ci. O mog\u00e2ldea\u0163\u0103 de pisic portocaliu, mititel \u015fi frumos. \u015ei m-am b\u0103gat \u00een tufi\u015f. O crac\u0103 aspr\u0103 mi-a penetrat bluza, l\u0103s\u00e2ndu-mi pe spate ceea ce viitorul meu amant va considera c\u0103 e un semn de \u00een\u015fel\u0103torie. Alt\u0103 crac\u0103 aspr\u0103 p\u0103rea decis\u0103 s\u0103 \u00eemi ofere pl\u0103ceri anale. M\u00e2\u0163ul m-a v\u0103zut, s-a tras de cap\u0103tul cel\u0103lalt al tufi\u015fului. Am \u00eencercat s\u0103 m\u0103 strecor, nu puteam. Am ocolit tufi\u015ful, am \u00eengenuncheat iar, am \u00eencercat s\u0103 ating pisicu\u0163ul. \u015ei desigur, vorba c\u00e2ntecului:<\/p>\n<div class=\"video-container\"><span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"700\" height=\"394\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/IqUwnF8_roo?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span><\/div>\n<p>Dac\u0103 \u015fti\u0163i bancul cu Ion, care a alunecat pe coaja de banan\u0103 \u015fi a c\u0103zut \u00een sat\u00e2r, \u015fti\u0163i \u015fi finalul: \u015eI TOT A\u015eA, DE OPT ORI.<\/p>\n<p>\u00centr-un final, c\u00e2nd m-a pocnit o crac\u0103 \u015fi peste ochi, i-am urat pisoia\u015fului mult succes \u00een carier\u0103 \u015fi-n via\u0163a personal\u0103, \u015fi m-am \u00eendreptat. Cred c\u0103 n-aveam noroi \u00een buric. \u00cen rest&#8230; de pl\u0103ceri anale am vorbit deja. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Veneam io azi c\u0103tinel spre cas\u0103, pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 parc, c\u00e2nd am auzit ni\u015fte mieun\u0103turi triste dintr-un tufi\u015f. -Nu v\u0103 sup\u0103ra\u0163i, sunte\u0163i tufi\u015ful care miaun\u0103?&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2762","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2762","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2762"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2762\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2762"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2762"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2762"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}