{"id":27830,"date":"2025-04-06T14:21:56","date_gmt":"2025-04-06T11:21:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=27830"},"modified":"2025-04-06T14:21:59","modified_gmt":"2025-04-06T11:21:59","slug":"clisee-nocive-daca-n-ai-copii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/clisee-nocive-daca-n-ai-copii\/","title":{"rendered":"Cli\u015fee nocive: Dac\u0103 n-ai copii…"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Relatam ieri pe profilul meu personal o mic\u0103 scen\u0103 de la supermarket, c\u00e2nd brusc, se \u00eenfiin\u0163eaz\u0103 leli\u0163ozaurul. Leli\u0163ozaurul e genul de muieret \u00een\u0163epenit mintal \u00een vremuri de dinaintea civiliza\u0163iei. Se propte\u015fte ferm pe cele dou\u0103 picioare posterioare \u015fi expectoreaz\u0103: \u201eDac\u0103 n-ai copii, tr\u0103ie\u0219ti degeaba!\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Unu la m\u00e2n\u0103: de c\u00e2nd m\u0103 cuno\u0219ti tu pe mine a\u0219a de bine, s\u0103 stabile\u0219ti dac\u0103 am pentru ce s\u0103 tr\u0103iesc? Numai faptul c\u0103 intri aici zi de zi s\u0103 vezi ce am mai scris arat\u0103 c\u0103 am infinite motive de tr\u0103it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

E extrem de bizar s\u0103 te iei a\u0219a de persoane pe care nu le cuno\u0219ti \u0219i care nu-\u021bi datoreaz\u0103 nimic. S\u0103 pretinzi c\u0103 evaluezi din sec\u021biunea de comentarii valoarea vie\u021bii lor. Sau valoarea priorit\u0103\u021bilor lor. Sau valoarea stilului lor de via\u021b\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Afirma\u021bia c\u0103 numai ipostaza de reproducere d\u0103 valoare vie\u021bii unei femei – oricare ar fi acea femeie – arat\u0103 o lips\u0103 profund\u0103 de respect fa\u021b\u0103 de respectiva femeie, ca fiin\u021b\u0103 uman\u0103, \u0219i considera\u021bie zero fa\u021b\u0103 de ce dore\u0219te ea de fapt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sau poate leli\u021bozaurul vorbea despre sine? C\u0103 via\u021ba ei proprie nu are nicio valoare \u00een afara propriilor ovare \u0219i a ce iese de acolo? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

E ca \u0219i cum ai fi la ferm\u0103 \u0219i ai evalua g\u0103ina prin prisma cantit\u0103\u021bii de ou\u0103. Dac\u0103 e ou\u0103toare, e valoroas\u0103. Dac\u0103 nu, consum\u0103 furajul degeaba. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

OK, dar eu nu sunt la ferma nim\u0103nui, \u0219i furajul meu nu e din banii fermierului, ci din ai mei personali. \u0218i periodic din ai vo\u0219tri, c\u00e2nd nu uita\u021bi s\u0103 sus\u021bine\u021bi blogul cu c\u00e2te o cafea pe Paypal. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dac\u0103 obiectiv sim\u021bi c\u0103 valoarea vie\u021bii tale st\u0103 DOAR \u00een copii, \u0219i c\u0103 f\u0103r\u0103 ei e\u0219ti nimic, poate c\u0103 e o idee bun\u0103 s\u0103 mergi la terapie. Pentru c\u0103 a fi un p\u0103rinte bun presupune, \u00een primul r\u00e2nd, s\u0103 fii un om s\u0103n\u0103tos din punct de vedere emo\u021bional. S\u0103 fii tu \u201ethe rock\u201d, c\u00e2nd copilul trece prin tantrumurile specifice v\u00e2rstei. S\u0103 \u00eel sus\u021bii cu experien\u021b\u0103 \u0219i maturitate c\u00e2nd \u00eent\u00e2mpin\u0103 o problem\u0103, s\u0103-i explici diferen\u021ba \u00eentre bine \u0219i r\u0103u, s\u0103 fii cel puternic \u0219i \u00een\u021belept din rela\u021bie, s\u0103 te poat\u0103 privi cu respect. Nimic nu-\u021bi pierde respectul copilului dec\u00e2t sentimentul c\u0103 p\u0103rin\u021bii sunt mai verze dec\u00e2t el. \u0218i degeaba te preseaz\u0103 lumea cu pove\u021be de genul \u201erespect\u0103-\u021bi p\u0103rin\u021bii\u201d dac\u0103 tu obiectiv nu ai ce respecta, pentru c\u0103 nu te bazezi pe ei cu absolut nimic niciodat\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eDe ce nu faci \u0219i tu un copil?\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cemi amintesc de o prieten\u0103 scriitoare care, la un moment dat, \u0219i-a blocat toate rudele femei. \u201dCa\u021bele astea nu m\u0103 \u00eentreab\u0103 niciodat\u0103 cum merge scrierea urm\u0103toarei c\u0103r\u021bi, dar le phoote aprig grija legat\u0103 de c\u00e2nd \u00eemi complic via\u021ba cu urlet de bebelu\u0219i \u0219i scutece\u201d, \u00eemi povestea ea. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Doar pentru c\u0103 avem ovare, NU \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 le folosim, \u0219i mai ales, NU la ordin. Fiecare dintre noi are un set de priorit\u0103\u021bi. \u00cen care poate sau nu s\u0103 intre un copil. Iar respectul fa\u021b\u0103 de al\u021bii \u00eencepe prin a nu le da tu pove\u021be generice vecine de genera\u021bie cu Proclama\u021bia lui Tudor Vladmirescu, ci din a \u00ceNTREBA. \u201eCe dore\u0219ti s\u0103 faci? Care sunt planurile tale de viitor?\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Iar dac\u0103 femeia respectiv\u0103 nu se vede pe ea \u00eens\u0103\u0219i ca mam\u0103, guess what? E perfect \u00een regul\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nu mai presa\u021bi oameni lipsi\u021bi de orice fel de aptitudini p\u0103rinte\u0219ti s\u0103 se reproduc\u0103 de gura voastr\u0103. Nu le cre\u0219te\u021bi voi copiii, nu ave\u021bi voi grij\u0103 de noile fiin\u021be umane rezultate din speechurile voastre \u0219i nu \u0219ti\u021bi c\u00e2t de neglijen\u021bi \u0219i de dezinteresa\u021bi pot fi p\u0103rin\u021bii lipsi\u021bi de aptitudini p\u0103rinte\u0219ti. Copil\u0103ria al\u0103turi de ei e un calvar, \u0219i rezultatul sunt adul\u021bi traumatiza\u021bi pe via\u021b\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Maic\u0103-mea e genul de femeie care s-a \u00eenmul\u021bit de gura bunicii \u0219i a colegelor, ca s\u0103-l responsabilizeze pe taic\u0103-miu, care era extrem de neimplicat \u00een c\u0103s\u0103toria cu ea. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Rezultatul? \u0102la a divor\u021bat oricum, pentru c\u0103 dac\u0103 un b\u0103rbat e neimplicat c\u00e2nd e\u0219ti doar tu, e cu at\u00e2t mai neimplicat c\u00e2nd e urlet de bebelu\u0219i prin cas\u0103 \u0219i aten\u021bia nu i se mai dedic\u0103 doar lui. Deci, nu doar c\u0103 am fost produsul presiunii populare, ci \u0219i e\u0219ecul de a \u021bine b\u0103rbatul legat de calorifer. \u0218i ne-a tratat \u00een consecin\u021b\u0103. Toat\u0103 copil\u0103ria noastr\u0103, nu i-a p\u0103sat dac\u0103 avem ce ne trebuie. Iar dac\u0103 formulam noi o nevoie copil\u0103reasc\u0103 normal\u0103, f\u0103cea o criz\u0103 de isterie de o auzeai de la intersec\u021bie. Rezultatul? Nici eu, nici fratele meu nu avem copii, \u0219i foarte bine c\u0103 nu avem. Cine \u0219tie ce traume transgenera\u021bionale am da mai departe. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

O lume \u00een care oamenii se reproduc DUP\u0102 CE \u00een\u021beleg care sunt responsabilit\u0103\u021bile p\u0103rinte\u0219ti, precum \u0219i faptul c\u0103 tu ai decis s\u0103 faci copilul, nu a cerut el s\u0103 se nasc\u0103, prin urmare, nu ai de ce s\u0103 te r\u0103zbuni pe el c\u0103 exist\u0103 \u0219i c\u0103 te \u00eencurc\u0103 va fi o lume mai bun\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sunt multe moduri cringe de ag\u0103\u021bat pe net, dar de departe cel mai cringe e \u201ebun\u0103, frumoaso, a\u0219 vrea s\u0103-\u021bi fac copii.\u201d Ironic, cei care o eructeaz\u0103 pe asta sunt cei cu zero calit\u0103\u021bi de provider. Pentru c\u0103 un b\u0103rbat responsabil se g\u00e2nde\u0219te \u00eent\u00e2i dac\u0103 are ce s\u0103 pun\u0103 pe mas\u0103 respectivului copil, dac\u0103 are din ce s\u0103-i asigure o copil\u0103rie decent\u0103 \u0219i bazele unui viitor. Un b\u0103rbat responsabil ezit\u0103 c\u00e2nd partenera lui long-term \u00eei spune: \u201eHai s\u0103 facem copii\u201d, pentru c\u0103 acum, cu r\u0103zboi economic \u00een toat\u0103 lumea \u0219i cu r\u0103zboi propriu-zis \u00een vecini, nu e cea mai bun\u0103 idee. E cel care-\u021bi spune: \u201eHai s\u0103 ne punem ordine \u00een via\u021b\u0103, s\u0103 se redreseze treburile pe plan global, \u0219i c\u00e2nd totul e ok, vorbim.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Acesta e genul de b\u0103rbat cu care merit\u0103 s\u0103 faci copii. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Concluzia acestui articola\u0219: Fat\u0103 drag\u0103, dac\u0103 nu vrei copii acum, reteaz-o leli\u021bozaurului \u0219i spune-i sec \u0219i tran\u0219ant: Valoarea vie\u021bii mele nu e dat\u0103 de func\u021bia de reproducere. Tr\u0103iesc o via\u021b\u0103 fericit\u0103 \u0219i \u00eemplinit\u0103 f\u0103r\u0103 copii, iar dac\u0103 vrei s\u0103 afli pentru ce tr\u0103iesc, e\u0219ti liber\u0103 s\u0103 \u00eentrebi. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dar \u00eentreab\u0103 frumos, c\u0103 altfel \u00ee\u021bi r\u0103spund cu un sarcasm: \u201eScopul vie\u021bii mele e s\u0103 efectuez zboruri frecvente \u0219i r\u0103t\u0103citoare pe m\u0103tur\u0103.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pe de alt\u0103 parte, cafeaua mi-ar lipsi teribil :).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da follow pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi pe TikTok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Relatam ieri pe profilul meu personal o mic\u0103 scen\u0103 de la supermarket, c\u00e2nd brusc, se \u00eenfiin\u0163eaz\u0103 leli\u0163ozaurul. Leli\u0163ozaurul e genul de muieret \u00een\u0163epenit mintal...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":27831,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-27830","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/witch.jpg?fit=1176%2C880&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27830","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=27830"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27830\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":27832,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27830\/revisions\/27832"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/27831"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=27830"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=27830"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=27830"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}