{"id":28561,"date":"2025-09-22T11:34:16","date_gmt":"2025-09-22T08:34:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=28561"},"modified":"2025-09-22T11:34:19","modified_gmt":"2025-09-22T08:34:19","slug":"biletel-de-adio","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/biletel-de-adio\/","title":{"rendered":"Bile\u0163el de adio"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Disclaimer: acesta e un text satiric. Rog aoleul, tulaiul \u015fi istericalele pe la mesele vecine. Inspirat de asta<\/a>, de asta<\/a> \u015fi de asta<\/a>. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Drag\u0103 patrie, drag popor, <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sunt Oleg Olegovici Ba\u015ftanov \u015fi scriu aceste r\u00e2ndule\u0163e s\u0103 v\u0103 m\u0103rturisesc c\u0103 \u00eemi iau adio de la o via\u0163\u0103 nefericit\u0103 \u015fi de la aceast\u0103 lume mult prea bun\u0103 pentru mine. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

E adev\u0103rat, m-a\u0163i v\u0103zut pe Instagram \u015fi pe TikTok \u00een palatul meu somptuos cu zece dormitoare, fiecare cu fotomodel \u00een dotare, plus dormitorul conjugal pentru Nata\u015fa, m-a\u0163i v\u0103zut conduc\u00e2nd o colec\u0163ie impresionant\u0103 de ma\u015fini de lux, a\u0163i citit despre investi\u0163iile mele de miliarde de dolari \u015fi a\u0163i fost invidio\u015fi pe petrecerile mele cu c\u00e2te o mie de invita\u0163i. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Acesta e motivul pentru care \u00eemi iau via\u0163a: nu mai pot cu at\u00e2\u0163ia bani. M\u0103 sufoc\u0103, m\u0103 asfixiaz\u0103, m\u0103 perturbeaz\u0103 emo\u0163ional, nu mai \u00eencap \u00een palat de ei, oriunde m\u0103 duc, oamenii arunc\u0103 cu bani \u00een mine \u015fi asta \u00eemi face via\u0163a un infern. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

C\u0103tre mult iubitul nostru pre\u015fedinte, Vladimir Putin, \u00eemi cer iertare pentru comentariile neinspirate, motivate doar de eroarea de a fi combinat vodca cu cocain\u0103 \u015fi cu Diazepam. \u00cen realitate, e\u015fti singura stea care ne ghideaz\u0103 existen\u0163ele efemere \u015fi f\u0103r\u0103 tine, eram praf generic. Tu ne faci eroi, solda\u0163i \u00een slujba singurei \u0163\u0103ri care ar trebui s\u0103 existe: Mama Rusie. Restul popula\u0163iilor de subumanoizi sunt coloniile tale, de\u015fi nu \u015ftiu asta. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Te iubesc, Vladimir. Nu a existat zi \u00een care s\u0103 nu vreau s\u0103-\u0163i ling fiecare b\u0103t\u0103tur\u0103 a t\u0103lpilor \u015fi ro\u015fea\u0163a acolo unde te-a ros pantoful. De aceea, voi urma gestul firesc al restului de confra\u0163i miliardari sinuci\u015fi \u015fi \u00ee\u0163i voi l\u0103sa \u0163ie toat\u0103 averea mea, s\u0103 ai bani de drone pentru c\u0103catul \u0103la de Europ\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

P. S. Pentru c\u0103 nu vreau ca resursele poli\u0163iei s\u0103 fie consumate aiurea pe aceast\u0103 sinucidere pe care o confesez cu inima deschis\u0103, adaug c\u0103 m-am \u00eempu\u015fcat singur cu patru gloan\u0163e \u00een spate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cu etern\u0103 recuno\u015ftin\u0163\u0103 pentru conduc\u0103torul iubit, <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Oleg. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Izbe\u015fte autorul cu o cafea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da follow pe Facebook<\/strong><\/a> \u015fi Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe YouTube<\/a><\/strong> \u015fi pe TikTok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Disclaimer: acesta e un text satiric. Rog aoleul, tulaiul \u015fi istericalele pe la mesele vecine. Inspirat de asta, de asta \u015fi de asta. Drag\u0103...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":28563,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28561","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/letter.jpg?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28561","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=28561"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28561\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":28562,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28561\/revisions\/28562"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/28563"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=28561"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=28561"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=28561"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}