{"id":28702,"date":"2025-10-26T14:00:30","date_gmt":"2025-10-26T11:00:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=28702"},"modified":"2025-10-27T03:31:05","modified_gmt":"2025-10-27T00:31:05","slug":"n-ai-nevoie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/n-ai-nevoie\/","title":{"rendered":"\u201eN-ai nevoie\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Zilele astea, radiourile dau \u00een heavy-rotation threesome-ul Connect-R featuring Smiley \u0219i Alex Velea cu \u201dN-ai nevoie de macheaji, e\u0219ti ok cum te-a f\u0103cut mama ta.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Piesa m\u0103 irit\u0103. \u0218i nu m\u0103 irit\u0103 doar din motivele evidente: c\u0103 toate dansatoarele din video au machiaj neutru de scen\u0103, deci nu, nu sunt cum le-au f\u0103cut mamele lor, \u0219i nici fondul de ten al lui Smiley, coafurile perpetuu evolu\u00e2nde ale lui Connect-R \u0219i piercingurile lui Velea nu s-au format \u00een uterul matern, ci versul \u00een sine, \u00een care \u00ee\u021bi spun negru pe alb c\u0103 \u201en-ai nevoie\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Pentru c\u0103 ei sunt deciden\u021bi pe nevoile tale. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Problemele \u00een orice cuplu \u00eencep c\u00e2nd \u00eencetezi s\u0103 ascul\u021bi de nevoile celuilalt \u0219i \u00eencepi s\u0103-i spui tu lui sau ei de ce are \u0219i nu are nevoie. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">O femeie pe care o  vezi frumoas\u0103 pe net are o mul\u021bime de nevoi despre care nu \u0219tii nimic. Nevoi strict fizice \u0219i de natur\u0103 igienic\u0103 \u0219i cosmetic\u0103. Altfel, ar fi o bab\u0103 la 30 de ani, ca femeile de la \u021bar\u0103, care \u00eentr-adev\u0103r nu tr\u0103iesc dec\u00e2t cu m\u00e2ncare, \u021buic\u0103 \u0219i religie. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">E adev\u0103rat, machiajul nu e o nevoie primar\u0103. Dar e o nevoie de statement. E un manifest de cochet\u0103rie. De aceea, meseriile care-\u0219i fac p\u00e2inea din seduc\u021bia b\u0103rba\u021bilor sunt cele care au cel mai abundent \u0219i strident machiaj. \u0218i de aceea, at\u00e2tea divor\u021buri se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 dup\u0103 o na\u0219tere, c\u00e2nd femeia nu are timp s\u0103 fug\u0103reasc\u0103 program\u0103ri la coafor, cosmetic\u0103, mani-pedi \u0219i restul saloanelor \u0219i e fix cum a f\u0103cut-o mama ei. Brusc, nu mai e atractiv\u0103. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dar nu exist\u0103 nimic mai lipsit de respect fa\u021b\u0103 de un om dec\u00e2t preten\u021bia c\u0103 \u00eei spui tu de ce are nevoie \u0219i de ce nu. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dac\u0103 melodia ar fi pe linia \u201dNoi prefer\u0103m femei naturale\u201d, treac\u0103-mearg\u0103. \u0218i eu prefer b\u0103rba\u021bi u\u0219or feminini, cu piele catifelat\u0103, \u0219i nu e cu nimic vina mea c\u0103 m\u0103 atrag ei, iar gigi-duru care vine s\u0103 se umfle \u00een pene \u00eemi inspir\u0103 c\u00e2\u00e2h. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dar dac\u0103 s\u0103 c\u00e2n\u021bi c\u0103 \u201en-are nevoie\u201d&#8230; lol. S\u0103-l v\u0103d pe Velea spun\u00e2ndu-i Antoniei c\u0103 n-are nevoie de machiaj, sau pe Smiley Ginei Pistol. I-ar fug\u0103ri consoartele cu tigaia sculat\u0103 prin tot cartierul. Pe Connect-R nu are cine s\u0103-l fug\u0103reasc\u0103. \ud83d\ude00 <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201dOK, eu n-am nevoie de macheaji \u0219i tu n-ai nevoie de sex oral. Problem\u0103 rezolvat\u0103.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dar cum m-am s\u0103turat de ranturi, de data asta am ales s\u0103 dau replica cu o parodie. Umorul m\u0103 prinde mai bine. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Originalul: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<div class=\"video-container\"><span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"700\" height=\"394\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/X-n8ub0ZNjk?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span><\/div>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Parodia mea: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-tiktok wp-block-embed-tiktok\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<div class=\"video-container\"><blockquote class=\"tiktok-embed\" cite=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lorena.lupu\/video\/7565053568076500246\" data-video-id=\"7565053568076500246\" data-embed-from=\"oembed\" style=\"max-width:605px; min-width:325px;\"> <section> <a target=\"_blank\" title=\"@lorena.lupu\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lorena.lupu?refer=embed\">@lorena.lupu<\/a> <p><a title=\"cumteafacutmamata\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/tag\/cumteafacutmamata?refer=embed\">#cumteafacutmamata<\/a> <a title=\"parodie\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/tag\/parodie?refer=embed\">#parodie<\/a> <a title=\"connectr\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/tag\/connectr?refer=embed\">#connectr<\/a> <a title=\"smiley\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/tag\/smiley?refer=embed\">#smiley<\/a> <a title=\"alexvelea\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/tag\/alexvelea?refer=embed\">#alexvelea<\/a> <\/p> <a target=\"_blank\" title=\"\u266c original sound - Lorena Lupu\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/music\/original-sound-7565054002212113174?refer=embed\">\u266c original sound &#8211; Lorena Lupu<\/a> <\/section> <\/blockquote> <script async src=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/embed.js\"><\/script><\/div>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dac\u0103 vre\u021bi s\u0103 afla\u021bi ce nevoi are un om, \u00eentreba\u021bi-l. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><br>***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dac\u0103 \u021bi-a pl\u0103cut articolul, arat\u0103-\u021bi sus\u021binerea cu o dona\u021bie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paypal.com\/paypalme\/Trollywood\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"250\" height=\"82\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/paypal-.jpg?w=700&amp;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-25884\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/paypal-.jpg?w=250&amp;ssl=1 250w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/paypal-.jpg?resize=150%2C49&amp;ssl=1 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 250px) 100vw, 250px\" \/><\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Vrei s\u0103 m\u0103 urm\u0103re\u015fti \u00een social media? \u00cemi po\u0163i da follow pe&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lorenaalmighty\/\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>&nbsp;\u015fi&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/lorena.lup\/\">Instagram<\/a><\/strong>, subscribe pe&nbsp;<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCCHBtHi6S2GlUFqETH70cjQ\">YouTube<\/a><\/strong>&nbsp;\u015fi pe<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lorena.lupu\">&nbsp;TikTok<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Zilele astea, radiourile dau \u00een heavy-rotation threesome-ul Connect-R featuring Smiley \u0219i Alex Velea cu \u201dN-ai nevoie de macheaji, e\u0219ti ok cum te-a f\u0103cut mama&#46;&#46;&#46;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":28703,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28702","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/smiley-alex-velea-connect-r-nu-ma-ierta.jpg?fit=1280%2C720&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28702","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=28702"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28702\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":28706,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28702\/revisions\/28706"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/28703"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=28702"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=28702"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=28702"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}