Unii, nu to\u0163i. C\u0103 nu generaliz\u0103m. Dar cretinii pu\u015fi pe aga\u0163amente sufer\u0103 de o lips\u0103 de logic\u0103 elementar\u0103. \u015eti\u0163i bancul cu badea Ion \u00een compartimentul de tren – badea Ion o oche\u015fte pe una care i se pare fute\u015f\u0103, \u00eentinde \u015ftergarul cu br\u00e2nz\u0103, slan\u0103 \u015fi ceap\u0103, o serve\u015fte, aia: nu mul\u0163umesc, scoate sticla cu palinc\u0103, o serve\u015fte, aia: nu mul\u0163umesc, iar badea Ion, sp\u0103\u015fit: aha, deci despre futut nici nu are rost s\u0103 aduc vorba.<\/p>\n
Deci, \u0163\u0103ranul din banc e suficient de inteligent s\u0103 trag\u0103 singur concluzia. Prostul urban care se bag\u0103-n seam\u0103 \u00een timp ce a\u015ftep\u0163i metroul, sau orice altceva, sau \u00een timp ce stai noaptea la coad\u0103 la shaorma nu. Am avut \u00een ultimele s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2ni acest pattern de dialog de fix 4 ori. 4! Asta \u00een condi\u0163iile \u00een care n-am prea ie\u015fit.<\/p>\n
—<\/p>\n
Se propte\u015fte cu ochii-n tine:<\/p>\n
-Pot ca s\u0103 te invit la o cafea? (cu variante de agramatism \u015fi retarzeal\u0103).<\/p>\n
-Nu, mul\u0163umesc.<\/p>\n
Iar la mine “nu, mul\u0163umesc” nu mai e de mult un “nu, mul\u0163umesc” timid, evaziv, s\u0103 nu r\u0103neasc\u0103. De c\u00e2nd m-am prins c\u00e2t de animale proaste \u015fi disperate sunt mul\u0163i b\u0103rba\u0163i, “nu, mul\u0163umesc” \u00een gura mea sun\u0103 a “mar\u015f \u00een mor\u0163ii m\u0103-tii”, dar cu alte vorbe.<\/p>\n
\u0102la mai st\u0103. (De ce oare? m\u0103 \u00eentreb. De ce un b\u0103rbat refuzat simte mereu nevoia s\u0103 mai fac\u0103 pu\u0163in pe prostul?).<\/p>\n
-Poate la o bere, ceva?<\/p>\n
-NU, MUL\u0162UMESC! (cu un bonus de fermitate, agresivitate, subtext de “mori, idiotule, ucis de un accident sinistru!”<\/p>\n
\u0102la continu\u0103 s\u0103 stea. (De ceeee? Ce pana mea o fi neclar \u00eentr-un refuz at\u00e2t de evident?)<\/p>\n
\u015ei aici urmeaz\u0103 ceea ce chiar nu \u00een\u0163eleg. Bovina \u00eentreab\u0103:<\/p>\n
-Poate ai chef s\u0103 mergem undeva?<\/p>\n
Deci, dup\u0103 ce tu refuzi sec propuneri de a petrece timp liber \u00een orice alt fel, \u015fi-i ar\u0103\u0163i c\u0103 nu te intereseaz\u0103 compania lui nici m\u0103car pentru o cafea banal\u0103, boul nu are nici m\u0103car logica \u0163\u0103ranului din banc, ci te \u00eentreab\u0103 mai mult sau mai pu\u0163in explicit dac\u0103 te fu\u0163i.<\/p>\n
\u0102la e momentul la care eu trec la nivelul protocolar zero.<\/p>\n
-C\u00e2t de prost poate fi cineva s\u0103 nu \u00een\u0163eleag\u0103 dintr-un “nu, mul\u0163umesc!” c\u0103 nu e cazul s\u0103 insiste? Nu, nu vreau cafea, nu vreau nimic, vreau s\u0103 te \u00eendep\u0103rtezi ACUM de mine c\u0103 dac\u0103 nu, sun la 112! A\u015fa e clar c\u0103 te g\u0103sesc hidos \u015fi nu, nici prin minte nu-mi trece s\u0103 socializez cu tine?<\/p>\n
De obicei, ie\u015firea isteric\u0103 \u00eei convinge. Dar, pe bune, mi-ar pl\u0103cea at\u00e2t de mult s\u0103 nu ajungem acolo. Mi-ar pl\u0103cea at\u00e2t de mult ca oamenii s\u0103 se simt\u0103 de la primele semne c\u0103 fac chestii de c\u0103cat \u015fi s\u0103 nu m\u0103 oblige s\u0103 le fut efectiv mamele. \u015ei, da, cred c\u0103 nesiguran\u0163a \u015fi complexele de inferioritate ale voastre, femei prea politicoase \u015fi prea binecrescute, sunt responsabile pentru asta. Cred c\u0103 \u00eentr-o lume \u00een care am lua cu toate lec\u0163ii de box de la 3 ani \u015fi am fi \u00eenv\u0103\u0163ate de mici s\u0103 zicem ce avem pe suflet, nu “vai, nu e frumos s\u0103 spui asta”, “vai, vezi, \u00eenva\u0163\u0103 s\u0103 nu superi”, nici boii nu ar fi at\u00e2t de tupei\u015fti.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Unii, nu to\u0163i. C\u0103 nu generaliz\u0103m. Dar cretinii pu\u015fi pe aga\u0163amente sufer\u0103 de o lips\u0103 de logic\u0103 elementar\u0103. \u015eti\u0163i bancul cu badea Ion \u00een...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[126,175,260,275],"class_list":["post-4425","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy","tag-dragostea-din-tei","tag-indigenous-people","tag-pacific-islanders","tag-polynesians"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4425","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4425"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4425\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4425"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4425"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4425"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}