Sunt ultimul om care s\u0103 fac\u0103 discrimin\u0103ri regionale sau etnice. Dimpotriv\u0103, cred c\u0103 noi to\u0163i suntem cet\u0103\u0163eni ai lumii, \u015fi unicele diferen\u0163e sunt cele de aptitudini \u015fi tendin\u0163e. \u015ei am c\u00e2\u0163iva prieteni olteni foarte ok. (De\u015fi \u015ftiu, linia de ap\u0103rare “\u015fi eu am prieteni unguri” e cea care-\u0163i garanteaz\u0103 c\u0103 \u0103la e un xenofob odios.)
\nDar nimic nu poate nega faptul c\u0103, de cum se ajunge cu trenul \u00een zon\u0103 olteneasc\u0103, \u00eencep s\u0103 urce idio\u0163i \u00een tren, sau s\u0103 coboare idio\u0163i deja existen\u0163i \u00een tren.
\nIeri, veneam de la Timi\u015foara. \u015ei, de cum a \u00eenceput Dun\u0103rea, s-au b\u0103gat peste mine – c\u0103, plm, mi-am pl\u0103tit locul, nu tot compartimentul – ni\u015fte idio\u0163i sini\u015ftri, duhnind a hoit \u015fi cu cele mai stridente voci din univers: o \u0163\u0103ranc\u0103 mai de 50, cu vocea \u015fmirghel, o bab\u0103 de vreo 80 cu vocea pi\u0163ig\u0103iat\u0103 \u015fi \u0163iuitoare \u015fi un mo\u015f de v\u00e2rsta \u0163\u0103r\u0103ncii-fiice.
\n-Uite, mam\u0103, Dun\u0103rea.
\n-\u015ei ce, e o g\u00e2rl\u0103 \u015fi at\u00e2t.
\n-Uite, mam\u0103, Dun\u0103rea.
\n(Un mod infailibil de a identifica idiotul irecuperabil \u015fi eutanasiabil e repetarea informa\u0163iei. \u00cen mor\u0163ii m\u0103-tii de prost sau proast\u0103, pe asta ai mai zis-o deja.)
\n-Vezi, mam\u0103, c\u00e2t de mare e Dun\u0103rea?
\n-E o g\u00e2rl\u0103 mai mare, d\u0103 \u0163\u0103ranca b\u0103tr\u00e2n\u0103 din umeri.
\n(Genul de pizd\u0103 care o arde superior; crede c\u0103 dac\u0103 exprim\u0103 vreo mirare, o s\u0103 par\u0103 mai pu\u0163in de\u015fteapt\u0103 f\u0103cut\u0103 gr\u0103mad\u0103.)
\n-V\u0103leu, uite, apa e chiar sub noi, \u00eencepe baba s\u0103 se vaiete. Dac\u0103 ne pr\u0103bu\u015fim?
\n(Eu \u00een g\u00e2nd: Ar fi pe merit. Dar eu ce vin\u0103 am?)
\n-Nu, mam\u0103, nu ne pr\u0103bu\u015fim, c\u0103 e construit bine. Uite, mam\u0103, Dun\u0103rea. Peste zece minute vine Por\u0163ile de Fier. \u015ei aia de pe malul cel\u0103lalt e Serbia.
\n(Eu \u00een g\u00e2nd: zgura m\u0103-tii, zgura m\u0103-tii, zgura m\u0103-tii. C\u0103ra\u0163i-v\u0103 dracu’, c\u0103ra\u0163i-v\u0103 dracu’, c\u0103ra\u0163i-v\u0103 dracu’)
\n-\u015ei apa asta mult\u0103 unde se duce? \u00eentreab\u0103 baba dup\u0103 vreo cinci minute de “O s\u0103 c\u0103dem” \/ “Ba nu, nu c\u0103dem!”
\n\u0162\u0103ranca t\u00e2n\u0103r\u0103: La Marea Neagr\u0103, mam\u0103!
\nBaba: P\u0103i uite c\u0103 nu e neagr\u0103, e gri.<\/p>\n
Au stat pe capul meu, cu mirosurile, vocifer\u0103rile \u015fi t\u00e2mpeniile lor, p\u00e2n\u0103 a disp\u0103rut Dun\u0103rea din peisaj. Mi-a\u015f fi dorit s\u0103 am la mine o mitralier\u0103. Pentru c\u0103 nu suport g\u00e2ndul c\u0103 cretinii \u0103\u015ftia sini\u015ftri au drept de vot. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Sunt ultimul om care s\u0103 fac\u0103 discrimin\u0103ri regionale sau etnice. Dimpotriv\u0103, cred c\u0103 noi to\u0163i suntem cet\u0103\u0163eni ai lumii, \u015fi unicele diferen\u0163e sunt cele...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7435","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7435","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7435"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7435\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7435"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7435"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7435"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}