Efuziunile erotico-sentimentale sunt un lucru minunat. Mai ales pentru urechile celor care nu sunt direct implica\u0163i. Cine are un job bun din acest punct de vedere, e un om norocos. Pentru restul, exist\u0103 MasterCard. S\u0103-\u015fi cumpere romane de dragoste.<\/p>\n
Domnul Costel T\u0103nase era norocos din acest punct de vedere. Postul lui de ofi\u0163er al serviciilor secrete era departe de ceea ce-\u015fi imaginau naivii \u015fi fanii lui Roger Moore c\u0103 ar \u00eensemna aceast\u0103 slujb\u0103: urm\u0103riri spectaculoase cu ma\u015fini de lux, fotomodele blonde cu dimensiuni perfecte, dornice s\u0103 pun\u0103 c\u00e2t mai repede buzele pe tine \u015fi cazinouri \u00eembibate de fine spirits. M\u0103 rog, poate existau agen\u0163i a c\u0103ror via\u0163\u0103 aducea pu\u0163intel cu filmele cu spioni; dar a domnului Costel T\u0103nase presupune s\u0103-\u015fi petreac\u0103 tura de opt ore \u00eentr-un birou minuscul, pr\u0103fuit, s\u0103 bea o cafea proast\u0103 f\u0103cut\u0103 la un expresor vechi, \u015fi s\u0103 monitorizeze telefoanele mai multor persoane \u00eensemnate.<\/p>\n
Dar domnului Costel T\u0103nase \u00eei convenea postul. C\u00e2nd ai nevast\u0103 terorist\u0103, greu de min\u0163it, \u015fi doi b\u0103ie\u0163i liceeni, preferi s\u0103 nu te av\u00e2n\u0163i prea departe \u00een ghearele aventurii, c\u0103 altminteri, ri\u015fti s\u0103 dormi pe pre\u015f. De aceea, se mul\u0163umea s\u0103 savureze la telefon certuri, scandaluri, amenin\u0163\u0103ri, \u015fantaje, negocieri dure \u015fi\u2026 ocazional, tandre\u0163uri interzise.<\/p>\n
Ca de exemplu, azi. Abia \u00ee\u015fi turnase prima cea\u015fc\u0103 de cafea, cu c\u0103\u015ftile pe urechi, c\u00e2nd auzi acel click bine cunoscut: subiectul r\u0103spunsese la telefon. Vocea lui manierat\u0103, dar pu\u0163in cam prea sub\u0163ire pentru ceea ce considera domnul Costel T\u0103nase c\u0103 ar trebui s\u0103 fie o voce de om politic, r\u0103sun\u0103 \u00eentr-o formul\u0103 politicoas\u0103 de salut expectativ. \u015ei atunci, se auzi riposta ei. O voce dulce, ca de catifea:<\/p>\n
\u201ePisoia\u015f, de ce nu m\u0103 mai iube\u015fti?\u201d<\/p>\n
Domnul Costel T\u0103nase ciuli brusc urechile. Vocea aceea senzual\u0103 \u00eei f\u0103cuse \u015fi lui s\u0103 vibreze coarda sensibil\u0103, de\u015fi el dep\u0103\u015fise cu mult v\u00e2rsta \u015fi gabaritul de pisoia\u015f. Nu putea fi considerat acum dec\u00e2t coto\u015fman, cu indulgen\u0163\u0103.<\/p>\n
\u201eEu\u2026 Drag\u0103 Andreea, te rog frumos. Nu \u015ftiu ce\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201eCe nu \u015ftii, pisoia\u015f?\u201d \u00eel \u00eentrerupse ea pe un ton bl\u00e2nd-mustr\u0103tor, care nu-\u015fi pierdu nici m\u0103car un strop din timbrul \u0103la irezistibil, provocator. \u201e\u00cen ultima vreme, am impresia c\u0103 ai cam uitat de mine.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201eAm fost ocupat, \u00een\u0163elege-m\u0103. Pur \u015fi simplu, muncesc de diminea\u0163a p\u00e2n\u0103 seara.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201eHai, pisoia\u015f\u201d, toarse ea, \u201eai fost tu ocupat \u015fi \u00eenainte, dar g\u0103seai mereu timp s\u0103 treci pe la mine\u2026 Pe la o cafelu\u0163\u0103 cu mult\u0103, mult\u0103 fri\u015fc\u0103. Ce s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat? Unde a disp\u0103rut chimia dintre noi?\u201d<\/p>\n
Chimia nu p\u0103rea s\u0103 fi disp\u0103rut, dimpotriv\u0103. Era at\u00e2t de intens\u0103, \u00eenc\u00e2t \u00eei afecta \u00een sens ascendent \u015fi anatomia domnului Costel T\u0103nase, care afl\u0103 astfel, cu agreabil\u0103 stupoare, c\u0103 \u00eenc\u0103 se mai poate numi b\u0103rbat, cel pu\u0163in telefonic.<\/p>\n
\u201eAndreea, termin\u0103! Sunt un om care munce\u015fte de diminea\u0163a p\u00e2n\u0103 seara, habar n-ai ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103 fii ministru \u00een perioada asta de criz\u0103 atroce \u015fi degringolad\u0103 major\u0103\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201eDar \u015fi sufletul meu e \u00eentr-o criz\u0103 atroce \u015fi o degringolad\u0103 major\u0103, pisoia\u015ful meu cu limbu\u0163\u0103 aspr\u0103, \u015fopti ea cu o melancolie \u00eenv\u0103luit\u0103 \u00een dorin\u0163\u0103. Eu sunt o femeie pasional\u0103 \u015fi fidel\u0103, sunt dependent\u0103 de tine. Voi, b\u0103rba\u0163ii, v\u0103 duce\u0163i la prostituate dac\u0103 n-o ave\u0163i l\u00e2ng\u0103 voi pe femeia iubit\u0103. Dar eu ce m\u0103 fac, pisoia\u015f? Nimeni nu are m\u00e2ini mai tandre \u015fi atingeri mai delicate ca ale tale\u2026 nimeni nu \u015ftie s\u0103-mi morfoleasc\u0103 lobii urechii \u015fi sf\u00e2rcurile a\u015fa cum o faci tu\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201eHa\u2026 stai pu\u0163in, Andreea\u201d, se auzi vocea t\u00e2n\u0103rului politician, ac\u0163ion\u00e2nd ca un du\u015f rece asupra imagina\u0163iei domnului Costel T\u0103nase, \u201eeu trebuie s\u0103 intru acum \u00eentr-o \u015fedin\u0163\u0103 \u015fi nu m\u0103 pot g\u00e2ndi la chestiile astea\u201d.<\/p>\n
Prostu\u2019 dracului! bomb\u0103ni Costel \u00een g\u00e2nd.<\/p>\n
\u201eTu mereu e\u015fti \u00een \u015fedin\u0163\u0103, pisoia\u015f. C\u00e2nd nu e\u015fti \u00een \u015fedin\u0163\u0103, lucrezi la proiecte de legi. C\u00e2nd nu faci nici asta, e\u015fti \u00een \u00eent\u00e2lniri de afaceri. Iar c\u00e2nd nu faci nici asta, ai treab\u0103 \u015fi punct. \u015ei eu sunt o treab\u0103 pe care o ai, pisoia\u015f. Pe mine c\u00e2nd m\u0103 rezolvi?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00centrebarea asta at\u00e2t de neru\u015finat\u0103 \u00een perversiunea ei \u00eel l\u0103s\u0103 perplex pe domnul T\u0103nase. Mai-mai s\u0103 intervin\u0103 pe fir, s\u0103 se ofere voluntar s\u0103 o rezolve el pe domni\u015foar\u0103. Dar zisese c\u0103 e \u015fi fidel\u0103, nu doar pasional\u0103; deci n-ar fi avut nici un rost.<\/p>\n
\u201eHai, te rog, Andreea, potole\u015fte-te\u201d, insist\u0103 politicianul. Dar vocea ei dulce, suav\u0103, pe strecur\u0103 peste a lui.<\/p>\n
\u201ePisoia\u015f, s\u0103 \u015ftii c\u0103 m\u0103 m\u00e2ng\u00e2i noapte de noapte cu g\u00e2ndul la tine. \u00cemi imaginez c\u0103 e m\u00e2na ta cea care-mi zg\u00e2nd\u0103re p\u0103s\u0103rica, dar nu e acela\u015fi lucru. Ai degetele alea at\u00e2t de lungi, de iu\u0163i, de juc\u0103u\u015fe. Uite, m\u0103 \u00eenfierb\u00e2nt \u015fi acum c\u00e2nd m\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc.\u201d<\/p>\n
Nu numai tu, \u00ee\u015fi zise \u00een g\u00e2nd domnul Costel.<\/p>\n
\u201eDraga mea, te rog, nu m\u0103 pune s\u0103 m\u0103 duc a\u015fa la \u015fedin\u0163\u0103\u201d, implor\u0103 politicianul. Uimitor! Autoritatea l\u0103sase loc rug\u0103min\u0163ii.<\/p>\n
\u201eAtunci, te rog s\u0103 \u0163ii \u015fi tu cont c\u0103 eu am aici o p\u0103s\u0103ric\u0103 fl\u0103m\u00e2nd\u0103 \u015fi e datoria ta s-o hr\u0103ne\u015fti, p\u0103pu\u015fel\u201d, murmur\u0103 dulce vocea feminin\u0103. \u201eTe rog, vino \u00een seara asta s\u0103 facem dragoste. Vreau at\u00e2t de mult s\u0103 te simt \u00een mine.\u201d<\/p>\n
Domnul Costel T\u0103nase sim\u0163i c\u0103 nu mai suport\u0103. L\u0103s\u0103 c\u0103\u015ftile pe mas\u0103 \u015fi se ridic\u0103 s\u0103 se duc\u0103 la baie, s\u0103 se elibereze rapid de presiunea pulsatil\u0103 care-i ap\u0103sa fermoarul de la pantaloni, c\u00e2nd, brusc, mobilul \u00eencepu s\u0103 sune. Se uit\u0103 pe ecran. Era nevast\u0103-sa. Sim\u0163i c\u0103 \u00eentreg universul interior i se pleo\u015fte\u015fte subit.<\/p>\n
\u201eDa, drag\u0103\u201d, r\u0103spunse el.<\/p>\n
\u201eCosteleee, s\u0103 nu ui\u0163i s\u0103 cumperi macaroane, ceap\u0103 \u015fi \u015func\u0103 d\u0103 porc c\u00e2nd vii acas\u0103, da? Da\u2019 s\u0103 fie d-aia gras\u0103, mai d\u0103grab\u0103 Kaiser, m-ai \u00een\u0163eles?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Efuziunile erotico-sentimentale sunt un lucru minunat. Mai ales pentru urechile celor care nu sunt direct implica\u0163i. Cine are un job bun din acest punct...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8411","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8411","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8411"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8411\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8411"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8411"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8411"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}