Treceam eu pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 IOR, cu mintea la ale mele, c\u00e2nd m\u0103 opre\u015fte brusc un mo\u015f zb\u00e2rcit \u015fi storcit. Se ridic\u0103 de pe banca de unde \u00ee\u015fi supraveghea doi nepo\u0163ei \u015fi-un c\u00e2ine, se holbeaz\u0103 lung la mine, casc\u0103 gura \u015fi zice:
\n-Domni\u015foar\u0103!
\n-Da.
\n-Numai ochii alba\u015ftri v\u0103 lipsesc ca s\u0103 fi\u0163i femeia ideal\u0103.
\n\u015ei iar am v\u0103zut ro\u015fu \u00een fa\u0163a ochilor.
\n-P\u0103i s\u0103 vedem. Dumneavoastr\u0103 v\u0103 lipsesc numai ochii verzi, p\u0103rul de o culoare (albul e ton, nu culoare), tenul \u00eentins, un corp fraged cu carnea tare, o pul\u0103 de 20 de centimetri, un cont gras la banc\u0103 \u015fi disponibilitatea de a-mi d\u0103rui mie diamante \u015fi plimb\u0103ri la Milano din con\u0163inutul lui. Dac\u0103 e s\u0103 compar\u0103m, stau mai bine.<\/p>\n
A r\u0103mas no reply. Eu am tirat-o ca s\u0103 nu asist la un infarct, ceva.<\/p>\n
B\u0103i, coaie. B\u0103i, oameni buni. \u00cenc\u0103 o dat\u0103: \u00eenainte s\u0103 freca\u0163i la icre femei care NU V\u0102 DATOREAZ\u0102 NIMIC, \u00een puii mei, \u015fi nu au nici un motiv s\u0103 dea doi bani pe idealurile voastre, UITA\u0162I-V\u0102 NAIBII \u00ceNTR-O AFURISIT\u0102 DE OGLIND\u0102. V\u0103 rog din inim\u0103.<\/p>\n
Dac\u0103 mi-ar zice Brad Pitt ce-mi lipse\u015fte ca s\u0103 fiu femeia ideal\u0103, poate c\u0103 a\u015f scoate iPhone-ul \u015fi a\u015f lua meditativ\u0103 noti\u0163e. Dar Brad Pitt, ca orice b\u0103rbat frumos, e un domn. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Treceam eu pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 IOR, cu mintea la ale mele, c\u00e2nd m\u0103 opre\u015fte brusc un mo\u015f zb\u00e2rcit \u015fi storcit. Se ridic\u0103 de pe banca...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8534","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8534","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8534"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8534\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8534"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8534"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8534"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}