Nu pot s\u0103 nu remarc c\u0103, de c\u00e2te ori vine vorba de nevasta Pre\u015fedintelui Rom\u00e2niei, tot m\u00e2rletele care \u00eembin\u0103 cu succes blugul din obor cu sacoul ieftin de la chineji \u015fi sandala cu \u015foseta se g\u0103se\u015fte, peste noapte, mare critic de fe\u015f\u0103n. Peste noapte, tot miticul ciocoflender c\u0103ruia, dac\u0103-i dai ac de cravat\u0103, \u00eentreab\u0103 unde are borta \u015fi unde e a\u0163a de cravat\u0103 s\u0103 o coas\u0103 de g\u00e2t s\u0103 nu-i cad\u0103-n ciorb\u0103 \u015fi de-i dai butoni, crede c\u0103 sunt supozitoare \u015fi-i bag\u0103 \u00een cur, tot analfabetul care are impresia c\u0103 Yves Saint Laurent e un juc\u0103tor de fotbal olandez iar Dolce and Gabbana, o marc\u0103 de curele din angro Europa, special create ca proptele pentru cele trei bur\u0163i pe care le t\u00e2r\u0103\u015fte dup\u0103 sine \u015fi \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103 le conving\u0103 pe domni\u015foare c\u0103 la 12 noaptea se transform\u0103 toate \u00een pule, tot talibanul care crede c\u0103 s\u0103punul e strict o form\u0103 de conservat evrei din Auschwitz se crede subit Lynn Yaeger. Grasa ro\u015fcat\u0103 care face critic\u0103 de stil \u00een Vogue. <\/p>\n
Rom\u00e2na\u015ful analfabet n-o critic\u0103 pe Carmen Iohannis pentru c\u0103 i-ar displ\u0103cea ce vede, ci pentru c\u0103 l-a auzit pe vecinu’ Tase zic\u00e2nd foarte sigur pe el c\u0103 nu a\u015fea se \u00een\u0163ole\u015fte o pre\u015fedint\u0103, care este, \u015fi ca s\u0103 nu-l cread\u0103 lumea prost, zice \u015fi el ca vecinu’ Tase. Dar azi, mama voastr\u0103 Lorena a preg\u0103tit ceva fresh pentru voi. Ghidul “s\u0103 vorbim dac\u0103 ne pricepem”. <\/p>\n
Deci, hai s\u0103 parcurgem \u00eempreun\u0103 urm\u0103torul test \u015fi s\u0103 vedem dac\u0103 te califici s-o latri vestimentar pe Carmen Iohannis. F\u0103r\u0103 Google. <\/p>\n
1. Ce este o pens\u0103 \u015fi unde se g\u0103se\u015fte ea?
\n2. C\u00e2t guler trebuie s\u0103 aib\u0103 un decolteu de tip b\u0103rcu\u0163\u0103? Argumenta\u0163i.
\n3. Care nuan\u0163\u0103 este mai \u00eenchis\u0103, taupe, marsala sau aubergine? Argumenta\u0163i.
\n4. Ce este un ascot \u015fi la ce se poart\u0103?
\n5. Care este diferen\u0163a dintre alpaca \u015fi mohair?
\n6. Ce tip de \u00eembr\u0103c\u0103minte creeaz\u0103 Vera Wang \u015fi pentru ce sex?
\n7. Care e diferen\u0163a \u00eentre pret-a-porter \u015fi streetwear?
\n8. Pumps \u015fi stilettos sunt unul \u015fi acela\u015fi lucru? Dac\u0103 da, argumenta\u0163i. Dac\u0103 nu, argumenta\u0163i.
\n9. Ce este organza \u015fi la ce se folose\u015fte?
\n10. Care-s diferen\u0163ele \u00eentre rochii de cocktail \u015fi rochii de sear\u0103? <\/p>\n
Booon. Acum d\u0103 Goag\u0103lu’ de rigoare \u015fi vezi c\u00e2te r\u0103spunsuri corecte ai acumulat. Dac\u0103 niciunul – ceea ce presupun c\u0103 e cazul – caut\u0103 cel mai apropiat perete. L-ai g\u0103sit? OK. D\u0103-te cu capul \u015fi repet\u0103: “Nu mai comentez chestii la care nu m\u0103 pricep”. Repet\u0103 \u00een 5 serii de c\u00e2te 20, diminea\u0163a, la pr\u00e2nz \u015fi seara, p\u00e2n\u0103 p\u0103trunde ideea. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Nu pot s\u0103 nu remarc c\u0103, de c\u00e2te ori vine vorba de nevasta Pre\u015fedintelui Rom\u00e2niei, tot m\u00e2rletele care \u00eembin\u0103 cu succes blugul din obor...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9779,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9778","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/carmen-iohannis.png?fit=620%2C349&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9778","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9778"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9778\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9780,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9778\/revisions\/9780"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9779"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9778"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9778"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9778"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}