{"id":9876,"date":"2015-10-10T08:18:38","date_gmt":"2015-10-10T08:18:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/?p=9876"},"modified":"2015-10-10T08:50:33","modified_gmt":"2015-10-10T08:50:33","slug":"romanian-gigolo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/romanian-gigolo\/","title":{"rendered":"Romanian Gigolo"},"content":{"rendered":"

Men\u0163iune: Uneori, m\u0103 uit prin textele mele vechi \u015fi g\u0103sesc unul la care \u00eencep s\u0103 r\u00e2d zgomotos. \u0102sta a fost scris la vremea aia pentru o revist\u0103 de pizde care m-a taguit recent ca “blogger”. Serios, s\u0103 taguie\u015fti ca blogger pe \u0103la care, \u00eenainte s\u0103-l enervezi p\u00e2n\u0103 la punctul b\u0103g\u0103rii de picior, \u00ee\u0163i aducea premii de jurnalism \u015fi materiale publicate \u00een edi\u0163iile interna\u0163ionale – asta \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103 fii mafiot. Dar divaghez. Deci, minireportaj de r\u00e2s. \u015ei blogger s-o faci pe m\u0103-ta. <\/em><\/p>\n

Femeile ur\u0103sc s\u0103 pl\u0103teasc\u0103 pentru sex. Le place s\u0103 simt\u0103 c\u0103 pot aburi \u015fi prestatori profesioni\u015fti. Cu acest g\u00e2nd \u00een minte, mi-am intrat \u00een rolul unei studente s\u0103race \u0219i n\u0103b\u0103d\u0103ioase din Gala\u021bi \u0219i-am pus m\u00e2na pe telefonul redac\u021biei, ca s\u0103 v\u0103d cum st\u0103 pia\u021ba de gigolo \u00een Bucure\u0219ti \u0219i mai ales, ca s\u0103 aflu dac\u0103 ar fi vreunul disponibil s\u0103 ofere o partid\u0103 gratuit.<\/p>\n

GIGOLO 1: \u201eHAI S\u0102 NE VEDEM LA MALL VITAN.\u201d<\/p>\n

Primul tip pe care l-am apelat a r\u0103spuns cu jen\u0103. Era maseur profesionist, f\u0103cea modelling \u015fi \u00eenso\u0163ire la evenimente. Am recunoscut \u00een el ceva din orgoliul prostituatei care, chit c\u0103 se fute pe bani, e \u015fi ea om \u015fi merit\u0103 respect. Dar o student\u0103 s\u0103rac\u0103 \u015fi ahtiat\u0103 dup\u0103 sex nu se las\u0103 cu una, cu dou\u0103: \u201eUite de ce v-am sunat: m-a p\u0103r\u0103sit prietenul, sunt singur\u0103 \u015fi vreau s\u0103 apelez la serviciile unui profesionist. Pe de alt\u0103 parte, n-am cu ce pl\u0103ti. M\u0103 sponsoriza\u0163i cu o partid\u0103 de sex?\u201d<\/p>\n

Pauz\u0103 lung\u0103 \u015fi \u00eencurcat\u0103: \u201eAm at\u00e2\u00e2\u00e2t de mult de lucru.\u201d \u00cenc\u0103 o pauz\u0103. \u201eE o ofert\u0103 intere\u2026 c\u00e2\u0163i ani ziceai c\u0103 ai?\u201d, \u201e20\u201d. \u201eBun, \u0103\u0103\u0103, uite\u2026 ar trebui s\u0103 te v\u0103d \u015fi eu cum ar\u0103\u0163i, s\u0103 decid dac\u0103\u2026 Pfff, nu \u015ftiu ce s\u0103 zic\u201d. \u201eVreau total\u201d, am completat. \u201eFac tot ce-\u0163i place, sunt din Moldova\u201d.<\/p>\n

Brusc, tonul lui a devenit mai prietenos: \u201eEi, da, cred c\u0103 ne putem \u00een\u0163elege dac\u0103 ar\u0103\u0163i bine. Pot s\u0103 te v\u0103d la webcam?\u201d \u201eN-am webcam, sunt din partea s\u0103r\u0103c\u0103cioas\u0103 a Moldovei, am luat compu\u2019 la second hand \u015fi nu am avut \u015fi de webcam.\u201d \u201eMda.\u201d<\/p>\n

Spre deosebire de o curv\u0103 adev\u0103rat\u0103, care ar fi zis: \u201eJet, b\u0103, s\u0103r\u0103cie\u201d, gigolo-ul nostru avea un ton comp\u0103timitor. Pentru o secund\u0103 am crezut c\u0103 m\u0103 ia acas\u0103, ca s\u0103 fiu amanta lui nematerialist\u0103, c\u0103reia \u00eei aduce banii c\u00e2\u015ftiga\u0163i de la turiste olandeze grase \u015fi slinoase.<\/p>\n

\u201eHai s\u0103 ne vedem la Mall Vitan, la 16:00. La Starbucks-ul de jos. S\u0103 v\u0103d cum ar\u0103\u0163i, apoi vedem ce facem. Poate ne \u00een\u0163elegem.\u201d Pe la patru f\u0103r\u0103 20 suna exasperat pe telefonul redac\u0163iei: \u201eUnde e\u015fti!? Aveam o \u00eent\u00e2lnireee!\u201d (\u201eAveam de futut\u201d, se h\u0103h\u0103ia lumea din redac\u021bie.)<\/p>\n

GIGOLO 2: \u201eAZI, LA 18:00, LA MINE ACAS\u0102!\u201d<\/p>\n

Al doilea expert \u00eentr-ale sexului nici m\u0103car n-a \u00eencercat s\u0103 afle cum ar\u0103t. \u201eDa, e \u00een regul\u0103. Hai la mine. Am o garsonier\u0103 pe care o \u00eenchiriez special pentru treaba de gigolo. Vino dup\u0103 18:00 \u015fi o facem. Faci total, da?\u201d<\/p>\n

At\u00e2ta cooperare m-a l\u0103sat tablou, a\u0219a c\u0103 am zis s\u0103 complic treaba cu urm\u0103torii.<\/p>\n

GIGOLO 3, TRANSEXUAL: \u201eIUBITA, SUNT NI\u015eTE COSTURI\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Primii transexuali pe care i-am contactat m-au flituit scurt: f\u0103r\u0103 femei! \u201eNu a\u015f face sex cu femei nici pl\u0103tit cu aur!\u201d Apoi am dat de Crystyana, care se descria drept \u201eo blond\u0103 matur\u0103 manierat\u0103\u201d \u0219i care a cedat cu un oftat.<\/p>\n

Dar c\u00e2nd i-am m\u0103rturisit c\u0103 sunt student\u0103 s\u0103rac\u0103 \u015fi nu am posibilit\u0103\u0163i financiare, a schimbat brusc tonul: \u201eIubita, sunt ni\u015fte costuri, da? Stau singur\u0103 \u00een apartamentul \u0103sta de lux, fardurile m\u0103 cost\u0103, coaforul m\u0103 cost\u0103, hainele m\u0103 cost\u0103, solarul m\u0103 cost\u0103. Dac\u0103 n-ai bani acum, revii c\u00e2nd ai!\u201d<\/p>\n

A\u015f fi vrut s\u0103-i spun c\u0103-s de la \u0163ar\u0103 \u015fi c\u0103-i pot aduce un purcel sau trei g\u0103ini, dar ceva \u00een tonul ei m-a oprit. Am \u00eencheiat sec: \u201eOK, te sun c\u00e2nd iau bursa.\u201d \u0218i-atunci, brusc, s-a \u00eendulcit: \u201eEi, a\u015fa da, scumpa. Pupici.\u201d<\/p>\n

GIGOLO 4: \u201eE\u015eTI G\u0102LEAT\u0102? NICIO PROBLEM\u0102!\u201d<\/p>\n

Urm\u0103torului gigolo i-am zis nu doar c\u0103 sunt student\u0103, s\u0103rac\u0103 \u015fi moldoveanc\u0103, ci c\u0103 sunt \u015fi g\u0103leat\u0103. Ei bine, nu chiar g\u0103leat\u0103, dar oricum foarte larg\u0103.<\/p>\n

\u201eP\u0103pu\u015fa, m\u0103 descurc. Am cu ce!\u201d. \u0102sta era un fl\u0103c\u0103u mai de cartier a\u015fea. \u201eUnde s\u0103 vin?\u201d \u201e\u00cen c\u0103min \u00een Regie e ok?\u201d \u201eOriunde, p\u0103pu\u015fa.\u201d \u201eBun, dar poate s\u0103 intre administratorul peste noi.\u201d \u201eEi, atunci nu. Undeva unde s\u0103 nu intre nimeni peste noi\u201d, a zis el ferm. \u201eOk, gata, o sun pe prietena mea cu garsonier\u0103, v\u0103d ce aranjez\u201d, m-am conformat eu. \u201e\u015ei, p\u0103pu\u015fa, zi-i c\u0103, dac\u0103 se bag\u0103, nu-i cer nici ei nimic. Chiar dac\u0103 e larg\u0103 \u015fi ea.\u201d<\/p>\n

GIGOLO 5: \u201eNU CRED S\u0102 N-AIB\u0102 CINEVA 200 DE LEI, S\u0102-\u015eI PIARD\u0102 VIRGINITATEA!\u201d<\/p>\n

Gigolo 5 se declara de lux (cerea 50 de euro \u00een loc de 50, o sut\u0103 de lei, c\u00e2t cost\u0103 treaba asta \u00een mod normal). Deluxe era \u015fi accentul ardelenesc, de baci harnic, care se scoal\u0103 odat\u0103 cu g\u0103inile, ca s\u0103 duc\u0103 oile la p\u0103scut. \u00cent\u00e2i i-am expus situa\u021bia clasic\u0103: student\u0103 moldoveanc\u0103, horny \u015fi s\u0103rac\u0103. R\u0103spunsul a venit scurt, clar \u0219i omenos: \u201eOk, hai s\u0103 ne vedem! Unde vrei tu.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201eBun, dar\u2026 sunt virgin\u0103.\u201d Cum a auzit-o pe asta, a retras pe loc superoferta: \u201eCu virginele e prea mult de munc\u0103. Nu fac sex gratis cu virgine. Vino cu dou\u0103 sute de lei \u015fi te rezolv.\u201d \u201eBine, dar sunt student\u0103.\u201d \u201eA\u015fa, \u015fi? Merit\u0103 dou\u0103 sute de lei.\u201d \u201eDa, dar nu am posibilit\u0103\u0163i.\u201d \u201eCere de la p\u0103rin\u0163i.\u201d \u201eCum s\u0103 zic: Mam\u0103, d\u0103-mi bani ca s\u0103-mi pierd virginitatea?\u201d \u201eP\u0103i nu zici asta, zici c\u0103 vrei pentru o rochie nou\u0103.\u201d<\/p>\n

Apoi a insistat: \u201eHaide, f\u0103 rost de dou\u0103 sute de lei \u015fi vorbim!\u201d Am \u00eenchis, n\u0103uc\u0103. Unde sunt vremurile \u00een care sclavele virgine costau dublu fa\u0163\u0103 de cele p\u00e2ng\u0103rite?<\/p>\n

GIGOLO 6: \u201eNUM\u0102R BLOCAT PENTRU NEPLAT\u0102.\u201d<\/p>\n

Asta e, meseria de gigolo nu e foarte profitabil\u0103 \u00een Rom\u00e2nia. De aceea ne emigreaz\u0103 valorile.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Men\u0163iune: Uneori, m\u0103 uit prin textele mele vechi \u015fi g\u0103sesc unul la care \u00eencep s\u0103 r\u00e2d zgomotos. \u0102sta a fost scris la vremea aia...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9877,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9876","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spicy"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/kokkkkalar.jpg?fit=728%2C409&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9876","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9876"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9876\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9882,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9876\/revisions\/9882"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9877"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9876"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9876"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lorenalupu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9876"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}